This is the sole design in publishing the following treatise17, which I hope will serve for an interim18 of some months to employ those unquiet spirits till the perfecting of that great work, into the secret of which it is reasonable the courteous19 reader should have some little light.
It is intended that a large Academy be erected20, capable of containing nine thousand seven hundred forty and three persons, which, by modest computation, is reckoned to be pretty near the current number of wits in this island 1. These are to be disposed into the several schools of this Academy, and there pursue those studies to which their genius most inclines them. The undertaker himself will publish his proposals with all convenient speed, to which I shall refer the curious reader for a more particular account, mentioning at present only a few of the principal schools. There is, first, a large pederastic school, with French and Italian masters; there is also the spelling school, a very spacious21 building; the school of looking-glasses; the school of swearing; the school of critics; the school of salivation; the school of hobby-horses; the school of poetry; the school of tops; the school of spleen; the school of gaming; with many others too tedious to recount. No person to be admitted member into any of these schools without an attestation22 under two sufficient persons’ hands certifying23 him to be a wit.
But to return. I am sufficiently24 instructed in the principal duty of a preface if my genius, were capable of arriving at it. Thrice have I forced my imagination to take the tour of my invention, and thrice it has returned empty, the latter having been wholly drained by the following treatise. Not so my more successful brethren the moderns, who will by no means let slip a preface or dedication25 without some notable distinguishing stroke to surprise the reader at the entry, and kindle26 a wonderful expectation of what is to ensue. Such was that of a most ingenious poet, who, soliciting27 his brain for something new, compared himself to the hangman and his patron to the patient. This was insigne, recens, indictum ore alio 2. When I went through that necessary and noble course of study, 3 I had the happiness to observe many such egregious28 touches, which I shall not injure the authors by transplanting, because I have remarked that nothing is so very tender as a modern piece of wit, and which is apt to suffer so much in the carriage. Some things are extremely witty29 to-day, or fasting, or in this place, or at eight o’clock, or over a bottle, or spoke30 by Mr. Whatdyecall’m, or in a summer’s morning, any of which, by the smallest transposal or misapplication, is utterly31 annihilate32. Thus wit has its walks and purlieus, out of which it may not stray the breadth of a hair, upon peril33 of being lost. The moderns have artfully fixed this Mercury, and reduced it to the circumstances of time, place, and person. Such a jest there is that will not pass out of Covent Garden, and such a one that is nowhere intelligible34 but at Hyde Park Corner. Now, though it sometimes tenderly affects me to consider that all the towardly passages I shall deliver in the following treatise will grow quite out of date and relish35 with the first shifting of the present scene, yet I must need subscribe36 to the justice of this proceeding37, because I cannot imagine why we should be at expense to furnish wit for succeeding ages, when the former have made no sort of provision for ours; wherein I speak the sentiment of the very newest, and consequently the most orthodox refiners, as well as my own. However, being extremely solicitous38 that every accomplished39 person who has got into the taste of wit calculated for this present month of August 1697 should descend40 to the very bottom of all the sublime41 throughout this treatise, I hold it fit to lay down this general maxim42. Whatever reader desires to have a thorough comprehension of an author’s thoughts, cannot take a better method than by putting himself into the circumstances and posture43 of life that the writer was in upon every important passage as it flowed from his pen, for this will introduce a parity44 and strict correspondence of ideas between the reader and the author. Now, to assist the diligent45 reader in so delicate an affair — as far as brevity will permit — I have recollected46 that the shrewdest pieces of this treatise were conceived in bed in a garret. At other times (for a reason best known to myself) I thought fit to sharpen my invention with hunger, and in general the whole work was begun, continued, and ended under a long course of physic and a great want of money. Now, I do affirm it will be absolutely impossible for the candid47 peruser48 to go along with me in a great many bright passages, unless upon the several difficulties emergent he will please to capacitate and prepare himself by these directions. And this I lay down as my principal postulatum.
Because I have professed49 to be a most devoted50 servant of all modern forms, I apprehend51 some curious wit may object against me for proceeding thus far in a preface without declaiming, according to custom, against the multitude of writers whereof the whole multitude of writers most reasonably complain. I am just come from perusing52 some hundreds of prefaces, wherein the authors do at the very beginning address the gentle reader concerning this enormous grievance53. Of these I have preserved a few examples, and shall set them down as near as my memory has been able to retain them.
One begins thus: “For a man to set up for a writer when the press swarms54 with,” &c.
Another: “The tax upon paper does not lessen55 the number of scribblers who daily pester,” &c.
Another: “When every little would-be wit takes pen in hand, ’tis in vain to enter the lists,” &c.
Another: “To observe what trash the press swarms with,” &c.
Another: “Sir, it is merely in obedience56 to your commands that I venture into the public, for who upon a less consideration would be of a party with such a rabble57 of scribblers,” &c.
Now, I have two words in my own defence against this objection. First, I am far from granting the number of writers a nuisance to our nation, having strenuously58 maintained the contrary in several parts of the following discourse59; secondly60, I do not well understand the justice of this proceeding, because I observe many of these polite prefaces to be not only from the same hand, but from those who are most voluminous in their several productions; upon which I shall tell the reader a short tale.
A mountebank61 in Leicester Fields had drawn a huge assembly about him. Among the rest, a fat unwieldy fellow, half stifled62 in the press, would be every fit crying out, “Lord! what a filthy63 crowd is here. Pray, good people, give way a little. Bless need what a devil has raked this rabble together. Z—— ds, what squeezing is this? Honest friend, remove your elbow.” At last a weaver64 that stood next him could hold no longer. “A plague confound you,” said he, “for an overgrown sloven65; and who in the devil’s name, I wonder, helps to make up the crowd half so much as yourself? Don’t you consider that you take up more room with that carcass than any five here? Is not the place as free for us as for you? Bring your own guts66 to a reasonable compass, and then I’ll engage we shall have room enough for us all.”
There are certain common privileges of a writer, the benefit whereof I hope there will be no reason to doubt; particularly, that where I am not understood, it shall be concluded that something very useful and profound is couched underneath67; and again, that whatever word or sentence is printed in a different character shall be judged to contain something extraordinary either of wit or sublime.
As for the liberty I have thought fit to take of praising myself, upon some occasions or none, I am sure it will need no excuse if a multitude of great examples be allowed sufficient authority; for it is here to be noted68 that praise was originally a pension paid by the world, but the moderns, finding the trouble and charge too great in collecting it, have lately bought out the fee-simple, since which time the right of presentation is wholly in ourselves. For this reason it is that when an author makes his own eulogy69, he uses a certain form to declare and insist upon his title, which is commonly in these or the like words, “I speak without vanity,” which I think plainly shows it to be a matter of right and justice. Now, I do here once for all declare, that in every encounter of this nature through the following treatise the form aforesaid is implied, which I mention to save the trouble of repeating it on so many occasions.
It is a great ease to my conscience that I have written so elaborate and useful a discourse without one grain of satire70 intermixed, which is the sole point wherein I have taken leave to dissent71 from the famous originals of our age and country. I have observed some satirists to use the public much at the rate that pedants72 do a naughty boy ready horsed for discipline. First expostulate the case, then plead the necessity of the rod from great provocations73, and conclude every period with a lash74. Now, if I know anything of mankind, these gentlemen might very well spare their reproof75 and correction, for there is not through all Nature another so callous76 and insensible a member as the world’s posteriors, whether you apply to it the toe or the birch. Besides, most of our late satirists seem to lie under a sort of mistake, that because nettles77 have the prerogative78 to sting, therefore all other weeds must do so too. I make not this comparison out of the least design to detract from these worthy79 writers, for it is well known among mythologists that weeds have the pre-eminence over all other vegetables; and therefore the first monarch80 of this island whose taste and judgment81 were so acute and refined, did very wisely root out the roses from the collar of the order and plant the thistles in their stead, as the nobler flower of the two. For which reason it is conjectured82 by profounder antiquaries that the satirical itch83, so prevalent in this part of our island, was first brought among us from beyond the Tweed. Here may it long flourish and abound84; may it survive and neglect the scorn of the world with as much ease and contempt as the world is insensible to the lashes85 of it. May their own dulness, or that of their party, be no discouragement for the authors to proceed; but let them remember it is with wits as with razors, which are never so apt to cut those they are employed on as when they have lost their edge. Besides, those whose teeth are too rotten to bite are best of all others qualified86 to revenge that defect with their breath.
I am not, like other men, to envy or undervalue the talents I cannot reach, for which reason I must needs bear a true honour to this large eminent87 sect88 of our British writers. And I hope this little panegyric89 will not be offensive to their ears, since it has the advantage of being only designed for themselves. Indeed, Nature herself has taken order that fame and honour should be purchased at a better pennyworth by satire than by any other productions of the brain, the world being soonest provoked to praise by lashes, as men are to love. There is a problem in an ancient author why dedications90 and other bundles of flattery run all upon stale musty topics, without the smallest tincture of anything new, not only to the torment91 and nauseating92 of the Christian93 reader, but, if not suddenly prevented, to the universal spreading of that pestilent disease the lethargy in this island, whereas there is very little satire which has not something in it untouched before. The defects of the former are usually imputed94 to the want of invention among those who are dealers95 in that kind; but I think with a great deal of injustice96, the solution being easy and natural, for the materials of panegyric, being very few in number, have been long since exhausted97; for as health is but one thing, and has been always the same, whereas diseases are by thousands, besides new and daily additions, so all the virtues98 that have been ever in mankind are to be counted upon a few fingers, but his follies99 and vices100 are innumerable, and time adds hourly to the heap. Now the utmost a poor poet can do is to get by heart a list of the cardinal101 virtues and deal them with his utmost liberality to his hero or his patron. He may ring the changes as far as it will go, and vary his phrase till he has talked round, but the reader quickly finds it is all pork, 4 with a little variety of sauce, for there is no inventing terms of art beyond our ideas, and when ideas are exhausted, terms of art must be so too.
But though the matter for panegyric were as fruitful as the topics of satire, yet would it not be hard to find out a sufficient reason why the latter will be always better received than the first; for this being bestowed102 only upon one or a few persons at a time, is sure to raise envy, and consequently ill words, from the rest who have no share in the blessing103. But satire, being levelled at all, is never resented for an offence by any, since every individual person makes bold to understand it of others, and very wisely removes his particular part of the burden upon the shoulders of the World, which are broad enough and able to bear it. To this purpose I have sometimes reflected upon the difference between Athens and England with respect to the point before us. In the Attic104 5 commonwealth it was the privilege and birthright of every citizen and poet to rail aloud and in public, or to expose upon the stage by name any person they pleased, though of the greatest figure, whether a Creon, an Hyperbolus, an Alcibiades, or a Demosthenes. But, on the other side, the least reflecting word let fall against the people in general was immediately caught up and revenged upon the authors, however considerable for their quality or their merits; whereas in England it is just the reverse of all this. Here you may securely display your utmost rhetoric105 against mankind in the face of the world; tell them that all are gone astray; that there is none that doeth good, no, not one; that we live in the very dregs of time; that knavery106 and atheism107 are epidemic108 as the pox; that honesty is fled with Astraea; with any other common-places equally new and eloquent109, which are furnished by the splendida bills 6; and when you have done, the whole audience, far from being offended, shall return you thanks as a deliverer of precious and useful truths. Nay110, further, it is but to venture your lungs, and you may preach in Covent Garden against foppery and fornication, and something else; against pride, and dissimulation111, and bribery112 at Whitehall. You may expose rapine and injustice in the Inns-of-Court chapel113, and in a City pulpit be as fierce as you please against avarice114, hypocrisy115, and extortion. It is but a ball bandied to and fro, and every man carries a racket about him to strike it from himself among the rest of the company. But, on the other side, whoever should mistake the nature of things so far as to drop but a single hint in public how such a one starved half the fleet, and half poisoned the rest; how such a one, from a true principle of love and honour, pays no debts but for wenches and play; how such a one runs out of his estate; how Paris, bribed116 by Juno and Venus, loath117 to offend either party, slept out the whole cause on the bench; or how such an orator118 makes long speeches in the Senate, with much thought, little sense, and to no purpose; — whoever, I say, should venture to be thus particular, must expect to be imprisoned119 for scandalum magnatum, to have challenges sent him, to be sued for defamation120, and to be brought before the bar of the House.
But I forget that I am expatiating121 on a subject wherein I have no concern, having neither a talent nor an inclination122 for satire. On the other side, I am so entirely123 satisfied with the whole present procedure of human things, that I have been for some years preparing material towards “A Panegyric upon the World;” to which I intended to add a second part, entitled “A Modest Defence of the Proceedings124 of the Rabble in all Ages.” Both these I had thoughts to publish by way of appendix to the following treatise; but finding my common-place book fill much slower than I had reason to expect, I have chosen to defer125 them to another occasion. Besides, I have been unhappily prevented in that design by a certain domestic misfortune, in the particulars whereof, though it would be very seasonable, and much in the modern way, to inform the gentle reader, and would also be of great assistance towards extending this preface into the size now in vogue126 — which by rule ought to be large in proportion as the subsequent volume is small — yet I shall now dismiss our impatient reader from any further attendance at the porch; and having duly prepared his mind by a preliminary discourse, shall gladly introduce him to the sublime mysteries that ensue.
点击收听单词发音
1 penetrating | |
adj.(声音)响亮的,尖锐的adj.(气味)刺激的adj.(思想)敏锐的,有洞察力的 | |
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2 grandees | |
n.贵族,大公,显贵者( grandee的名词复数 ) | |
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3 apprehensions | |
疑惧 | |
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4 intervals | |
n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 );间隔时间;[数学]区间;(戏剧、电影或音乐会的)幕间休息 | |
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5 canvassing | |
v.(在政治方面)游说( canvass的现在分词 );调查(如选举前选民的)意见;为讨论而提出(意见等);详细检查 | |
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6 fixed | |
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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7 levies | |
(部队)征兵( levy的名词复数 ); 募捐; 被征募的军队 | |
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8 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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9 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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10 expedient | |
adj.有用的,有利的;n.紧急的办法,权宜之计 | |
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11 maturity | |
n.成熟;完成;(支票、债券等)到期 | |
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12 seamen | |
n.海员 | |
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13 parable | |
n.寓言,比喻 | |
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14 rotation | |
n.旋转;循环,轮流 | |
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15 commonwealth | |
n.共和国,联邦,共同体 | |
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16 inquiry | |
n.打听,询问,调查,查问 | |
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17 treatise | |
n.专著;(专题)论文 | |
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18 interim | |
adj.暂时的,临时的;n.间歇,过渡期间 | |
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19 courteous | |
adj.彬彬有礼的,客气的 | |
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20 ERECTED | |
adj. 直立的,竖立的,笔直的 vt. 使 ... 直立,建立 | |
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21 spacious | |
adj.广阔的,宽敞的 | |
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22 attestation | |
n.证词 | |
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23 certifying | |
(尤指书面)证明( certify的现在分词 ); 发证书给…; 证明(某人)患有精神病; 颁发(或授予)专业合格证书 | |
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24 sufficiently | |
adv.足够地,充分地 | |
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25 dedication | |
n.奉献,献身,致力,题献,献辞 | |
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26 kindle | |
v.点燃,着火 | |
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27 soliciting | |
v.恳求( solicit的现在分词 );(指娼妇)拉客;索求;征求 | |
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28 egregious | |
adj.非常的,过分的 | |
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29 witty | |
adj.机智的,风趣的 | |
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30 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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31 utterly | |
adv.完全地,绝对地 | |
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32 annihilate | |
v.使无效;毁灭;取消 | |
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33 peril | |
n.(严重的)危险;危险的事物 | |
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34 intelligible | |
adj.可理解的,明白易懂的,清楚的 | |
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35 relish | |
n.滋味,享受,爱好,调味品;vt.加调味料,享受,品味;vi.有滋味 | |
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36 subscribe | |
vi.(to)订阅,订购;同意;vt.捐助,赞助 | |
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37 proceeding | |
n.行动,进行,(pl.)会议录,学报 | |
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38 solicitous | |
adj.热切的,挂念的 | |
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39 accomplished | |
adj.有才艺的;有造诣的;达到了的 | |
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40 descend | |
vt./vi.传下来,下来,下降 | |
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41 sublime | |
adj.崇高的,伟大的;极度的,不顾后果的 | |
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42 maxim | |
n.格言,箴言 | |
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43 posture | |
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势 | |
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44 parity | |
n.平价,等价,比价,对等 | |
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45 diligent | |
adj.勤勉的,勤奋的 | |
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46 recollected | |
adj.冷静的;镇定的;被回忆起的;沉思默想的v.记起,想起( recollect的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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47 candid | |
adj.公正的,正直的;坦率的 | |
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48 peruser | |
精细阅读者 | |
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49 professed | |
公开声称的,伪称的,已立誓信教的 | |
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50 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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51 apprehend | |
vt.理解,领悟,逮捕,拘捕,忧虑 | |
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52 perusing | |
v.读(某篇文字)( peruse的现在分词 );(尤指)细阅;审阅;匆匆读或心不在焉地浏览(某篇文字) | |
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53 grievance | |
n.怨愤,气恼,委屈 | |
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54 swarms | |
蜂群,一大群( swarm的名词复数 ) | |
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55 lessen | |
vt.减少,减轻;缩小 | |
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56 obedience | |
n.服从,顺从 | |
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57 rabble | |
n.乌合之众,暴民;下等人 | |
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58 strenuously | |
adv.奋发地,费力地 | |
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59 discourse | |
n.论文,演说;谈话;话语;vi.讲述,著述 | |
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60 secondly | |
adv.第二,其次 | |
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61 mountebank | |
n.江湖郎中;骗子 | |
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62 stifled | |
(使)窒息, (使)窒闷( stifle的过去式和过去分词 ); 镇压,遏制; 堵 | |
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63 filthy | |
adj.卑劣的;恶劣的,肮脏的 | |
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64 weaver | |
n.织布工;编织者 | |
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65 sloven | |
adj.不修边幅的 | |
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66 guts | |
v.狼吞虎咽,贪婪地吃,飞碟游戏(比赛双方每组5人,相距15码,互相掷接飞碟);毁坏(建筑物等)的内部( gut的第三人称单数 );取出…的内脏n.勇气( gut的名词复数 );内脏;消化道的下段;肠 | |
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67 underneath | |
adj.在...下面,在...底下;adv.在下面 | |
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68 noted | |
adj.著名的,知名的 | |
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69 eulogy | |
n.颂词;颂扬 | |
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70 satire | |
n.讽刺,讽刺文学,讽刺作品 | |
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71 dissent | |
n./v.不同意,持异议 | |
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72 pedants | |
n.卖弄学问的人,学究,书呆子( pedant的名词复数 ) | |
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73 provocations | |
n.挑衅( provocation的名词复数 );激怒;刺激;愤怒的原因 | |
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74 lash | |
v.系牢;鞭打;猛烈抨击;n.鞭打;眼睫毛 | |
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75 reproof | |
n.斥责,责备 | |
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76 callous | |
adj.无情的,冷淡的,硬结的,起老茧的 | |
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77 nettles | |
n.荨麻( nettle的名词复数 ) | |
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78 prerogative | |
n.特权 | |
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79 worthy | |
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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80 monarch | |
n.帝王,君主,最高统治者 | |
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81 judgment | |
n.审判;判断力,识别力,看法,意见 | |
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82 conjectured | |
推测,猜测,猜想( conjecture的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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83 itch | |
n.痒,渴望,疥癣;vi.发痒,渴望 | |
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84 abound | |
vi.大量存在;(in,with)充满,富于 | |
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85 lashes | |
n.鞭挞( lash的名词复数 );鞭子;突然猛烈的一击;急速挥动v.鞭打( lash的第三人称单数 );煽动;紧系;怒斥 | |
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86 qualified | |
adj.合格的,有资格的,胜任的,有限制的 | |
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87 eminent | |
adj.显赫的,杰出的,有名的,优良的 | |
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88 sect | |
n.派别,宗教,学派,派系 | |
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89 panegyric | |
n.颂词,颂扬 | |
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90 dedications | |
奉献( dedication的名词复数 ); 献身精神; 教堂的)献堂礼; (书等作品上的)题词 | |
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91 torment | |
n.折磨;令人痛苦的东西(人);vt.折磨;纠缠 | |
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92 nauseating | |
adj.令人恶心的,使人厌恶的v.使恶心,作呕( nauseate的现在分词 ) | |
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93 Christian | |
adj.基督教徒的;n.基督教徒 | |
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94 imputed | |
v.把(错误等)归咎于( impute的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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95 dealers | |
n.商人( dealer的名词复数 );贩毒者;毒品贩子;发牌者 | |
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96 injustice | |
n.非正义,不公正,不公平,侵犯(别人的)权利 | |
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97 exhausted | |
adj.极其疲惫的,精疲力尽的 | |
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98 virtues | |
美德( virtue的名词复数 ); 德行; 优点; 长处 | |
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99 follies | |
罪恶,时事讽刺剧; 愚蠢,蠢笨,愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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100 vices | |
缺陷( vice的名词复数 ); 恶习; 不道德行为; 台钳 | |
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101 cardinal | |
n.(天主教的)红衣主教;adj.首要的,基本的 | |
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102 bestowed | |
赠给,授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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103 blessing | |
n.祈神赐福;祷告;祝福,祝愿 | |
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104 attic | |
n.顶楼,屋顶室 | |
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105 rhetoric | |
n.修辞学,浮夸之言语 | |
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106 knavery | |
n.恶行,欺诈的行为 | |
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107 atheism | |
n.无神论,不信神 | |
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108 epidemic | |
n.流行病;盛行;adj.流行性的,流传极广的 | |
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109 eloquent | |
adj.雄辩的,口才流利的;明白显示出的 | |
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110 nay | |
adv.不;n.反对票,投反对票者 | |
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111 dissimulation | |
n.掩饰,虚伪,装糊涂 | |
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112 bribery | |
n.贿络行为,行贿,受贿 | |
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113 chapel | |
n.小教堂,殡仪馆 | |
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114 avarice | |
n.贪婪;贪心 | |
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115 hypocrisy | |
n.伪善,虚伪 | |
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116 bribed | |
v.贿赂( bribe的过去式和过去分词 );向(某人)行贿,贿赂 | |
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117 loath | |
adj.不愿意的;勉强的 | |
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118 orator | |
n.演说者,演讲者,雄辩家 | |
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119 imprisoned | |
下狱,监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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120 defamation | |
n.诽谤;中伤 | |
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121 expatiating | |
v.详述,细说( expatiate的现在分词 ) | |
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122 inclination | |
n.倾斜;点头;弯腰;斜坡;倾度;倾向;爱好 | |
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123 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
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124 proceedings | |
n.进程,过程,议程;诉讼(程序);公报 | |
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125 defer | |
vt.推迟,拖延;vi.(to)遵从,听从,服从 | |
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126 Vogue | |
n.时髦,时尚;adj.流行的 | |
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