There are people who must always be quarrelling, whose exuberant5 energy must be discharged in this way, to whom life does not seem worth [Pg 172]while if it runs along smoothly6. These are the everlastingly7 unsatisfied who have not found the ideals of their youth, who have not attained9 their dreams. They project their discontent, their internal distraction10, upon all their daily experiences. That is why they so often appear to be overcharged with emotion; that is why the intensity11 of their excitement is incomprehensible to us. For it is a fact that they fly into rages about trivial matters. But it is this very intensity of emotion that shows that there is more behind these little rows than they will ordinarily admit, that the quarrel derives12 its fuel from a deeper source than appears on the surface.
It has struck many observers that the external provocation13 to quarrelling is often very trivial. Of course we frequently hear a man or his wife declare that they would gladly avoid a quarrel if it were possible to do so. Either one says something that seems to be quite innocent, and yet it will be the occasion for a heated altercation14, a great domestic scene with all its unpleasant consequences.
This is due to the fact that most persons do not distinguish between cause and provocation. The provocation to a quarrel is easily found if hidden unconscious forces seek for it, if a deeper cause, acting15 as a driving power, sets the wheels of passion in motion.
A somewhat careful investigation16 of every quarrel easily brings the conviction that it is [Pg 173]invariably the secret, unconscious emotions that bring about the conflict of opinions. Where this deep resonance17 of the unconscious is lacking we playfully pass over differences. Unfortunately there are probably no two human beings whose souls vibrate so harmoniously19 that there never occurs a discord20. This phenomenon is altogether too deeply rooted in human nature for an exception ever to occur. And paradoxical as it may sound, it is lovers who love each other most who cause each other the greatest pain. The great intensity which their emotions attain8 is due only to the fact they have repressed a series of experiences and feelings. They are blind to the faults of the beloved because they do not wish to see these faults. But the suppressed forces have not yet lost their power over the soul. These bring about the quarrel, and are capable, even if only for a few seconds, to transform love into hatred21.
But a few practical examples will do more to make this subject clear than all our theoretical explanations. Mr. N. S., a pious22, upright man, asserts that his present ailment23 dates from a quarrel that had been frightfully upsetting him for months. He had inherited from his father a large library rich in manuscripts, and had also succeeded him in his position. One day his brother came to him and stormily demanded the return of the books. But inasmuch as he was the older he felt himself entitled to be the sole heir. A violent quarrel ensued, during which [Pg 174]he exclaimed: “I’ll die before I give up any of these books!” After the quarrel he became very neurotic24. He tortures himself with self-reproaches; he is convinced that with that exclamation25 he had been guilty of an act of impiety26; he is very unhappy and finds no rest, no peace, either at home or in his office.
Many persons may be satisfied with the superficial explanation offered by the patient himself that he is an ardent27 bibliophile28 and collector of ancient manuscripts. But the physician who treats sick souls must not be so easily satisfied.
We know that every collector is an unconscious Don Juan who has transferred his passion from an erotic upon a non-erotic sphere. But we also know that the passion with which the collected objects are loved emanates30 from the erotic domain31. And what did our psychoanalysis of the above case bring out? Remarkably32 enough a rivalry33 between the two brothers which went back all the way to their youth. The older one had the privileges of the first-born and was a good-for-nothing. The younger one was a pattern of what a child ought to be. From their childhood they had been rivals for the affection of their parents, and more especially of the mother. We encounter here the so-called “Oedipus motive34,” a son’s love for his mother—a motive whose instinctive35 force and urge are still too imperfectly appreciated. The two had been rivals, the older one being jealous of the parents’ preference for the [Pg 175]younger one, and the younger jealous of the older one’s privileges. In this we have the first of the deeper motives36 for the quarrel. Further investigation brought a second and a third motive to light. The older had, very naturally, married first, and repeatedly boasted in the presence of his younger and unmarried brother of his wife’s charms and virtues38. In fact, he had even led him into his wife’s bedroom that he might see for himself what a treasure he possessed39. (You see the motives of such stories as “Gyges and his Ring” and “King Candaules” occurring even nowadays.) At that moment a great passion for his sister-in-law flared40 up in the younger brother’s breast. Here we have then a second cause for dissension. But other factors are also involved. Our pious young man married a beautiful woman and would have been happy if he had not been the victim of a jealous passion. Jealousy41 always has its origin in the knowledge of one’s inferiority. He thought he noticed that his older brother was too devoted42 to his wife. And during an excursion into the country they had been in the woods a little too long, as he thought, and it occurred to him—and here we have the fourth motive—to tempt43 his sister-in-law. He is a Don Juan who runs after every petticoat and wants to drain life in large draughts44. N. S. was a pious virtuous45 man who knew how to turn his sinful cravings to good account for the success of his business and to bad account as far as his health was concerned. The brother whom [Pg 176]he despised openly he envied in secret. But we could mention still other motives for their quarrel if Mrs. Grundy considerations did not bar the way....
Unconscious sexual motives lurk46 behind many quarrels, one might almost say behind most quarrels. We have already hinted that dissensions between brothers or sisters are due to rivalry. But even in the quarrels between parents and children we may frequently enough demonstrate the identical undertone for the disharmony. The infant son sees in his father a rival for the mother’s favour. The reverse also occurs, though not so frequently. I was once the witness to a violent quarrel between a father and his son. The father had, as it seemed to me, not the slightest cause for grievance47 against the son, and yet a little trifle led to a violent altercation that ended in a tragic48 scene. At the height of the row the father screamed to his wife: “You are to blame for it all! You robbed me of my son’s love!”
Naturally one would think that this lava49 stream belched50 forth51 in a great burst of passion from a volcano would contain the truth in its torrid current. And so it does, but in a disguised form. The true reproach should have been directed at the son, and should have been: “You have robbed me of my wife’s love!”
We see in this a “transference” of a painful emotion from one person upon another. Such transferences or “displacements” are extremely [Pg 177]common in everyday life, and it is only with their aid that we can account for the many domestic conflicts. A man will rarely admit that he erred29 in the choice of a wife. The feeling of hatred that his wife engenders52 in him he transfers upon others. Upon whom? The answer is obvious. Upon her next of kin18. Most frequently upon her mother, the most immediate53 cause of her existence. This is the secret meaning of the many mother-in-law jokes, a never-failing and inexhaustible and perpetual theme for wits.
So that, for example, if we hear a young woman complain that she cannot bear her husband’s family but that she loves him beyond bounds we may with perfect safety translate this in the language of the unconscious thus: “I would not care a rap about my husband’s family if I did not have to love my husband.”
The rows with servants, well-known daily occurrences, become intelligible54 only if we know the law of transference. An unfaithful wife, who had been betrayed and deserted55 by her lover, suddenly began to watch her servant girls suspiciously, and to strike them on the slightest provocations56. The woman had for years employed “help” without having had more than the customary quarrels with them. After a short sojourn57 with her husband the rage of the abandoned woman, who would have loved to give her faithless lover a good thrashing in true southern fashion, was transferred upon her servants. And exactly like this the resentment58 [Pg 178]of many a housewife is discharged through these more or less innocent lightning rods, and thus is brought about the phenomenon so common in modern large cities which may be designated as “servant-girl neurosis.”
Obviously the deeper motives slumber59 in the unconscious, and if they ever become conscious they are looked upon as sinfulness and bad temper. Freud has become the founder60 of a wholly new psychology61 by virtue37 of his discovery of the laws of repression62 and of transference—a psychology which will be indispensable to the criminologist of the future. What is nowadays brought to light in our halls of justice as the psychological bases for conflicts is generally only superficial psychology.
This is strikingly illustrated63 by one of the saddest of legal proceedings64 of last year. I mean the trial for murder in the Murri-Boumartini case, in consequence of which an innocent victim—so I am convinced—the Countess Linda Boumartini is languishing65 in prison. Her brother Tullio, who had murdered his brother-in-law, was accused of an illicit66 relationship with his sister, for otherwise the murder would have been inexplicable67. One who has carefully read Linda’s memoirs68 and her letters, which are now before the public, as well as the confessions69 of the imprisoned70 Tullio, will be sure to laugh at the accusation71, which unquestionably owed its origin to a clerical plot. What may have really happened is that unconscious brotherly [Pg 179]love which deep down under consciousness in all likelihood takes its origin from the sexual but whose flowers appear on the surface of consciousness as the loftiest manifestations72 of ethical73 feeling. It was brotherly love, the primal74 motive which Wagner immortalised in his “Valkyrie,” that forced the dagger75 into Tullio Murri’s hand. He saw his sister suffer and go to pieces because of the brutal76 stupidity of his brother-in-law. What lay hidden behind his pure fraternal love may never have entered his consciousness.
Oh, we unfortunates, doomed77 to eternal blindness! What we see of the motives of great conflicts is usually only the surface. Even in the case of the little domestic quarrels, the irritating frictions78 of everyday life, the vessel79 of knowledge sails only over the easily excited ripples80. But what gives these waters their black aspect is the deep bed over which they lie. Down there, at the bottom of the sea which represents our soul, there ever abide81 ugly, deformed82 monsters—our instincts and desires—emanating from the beginnings of man’s history. When they bestir their coarse bodies the sea too trembles and is slightly set in motion. And we stupid human beings think it is the surface wind that has begot83 the waves.
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1 liars | |
说谎者( liar的名词复数 ) | |
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2 oblivious | |
adj.易忘的,遗忘的,忘却的,健忘的 | |
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3 quaff | |
v.一饮而尽;痛饮 | |
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4 sip | |
v.小口地喝,抿,呷;n.一小口的量 | |
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5 exuberant | |
adj.充满活力的;(植物)繁茂的 | |
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6 smoothly | |
adv.平滑地,顺利地,流利地,流畅地 | |
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7 everlastingly | |
永久地,持久地 | |
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8 attain | |
vt.达到,获得,完成 | |
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9 attained | |
(通常经过努力)实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 ); 达到; 获得; 达到(某年龄、水平、状况) | |
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10 distraction | |
n.精神涣散,精神不集中,消遣,娱乐 | |
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11 intensity | |
n.强烈,剧烈;强度;烈度 | |
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12 derives | |
v.得到( derive的第三人称单数 );(从…中)得到获得;源于;(从…中)提取 | |
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13 provocation | |
n.激怒,刺激,挑拨,挑衅的事物,激怒的原因 | |
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14 altercation | |
n.争吵,争论 | |
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15 acting | |
n.演戏,行为,假装;adj.代理的,临时的,演出用的 | |
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16 investigation | |
n.调查,调查研究 | |
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17 resonance | |
n.洪亮;共鸣;共振 | |
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18 kin | |
n.家族,亲属,血缘关系;adj.亲属关系的,同类的 | |
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19 harmoniously | |
和谐地,调和地 | |
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20 discord | |
n.不和,意见不合,争论,(音乐)不和谐 | |
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21 hatred | |
n.憎恶,憎恨,仇恨 | |
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22 pious | |
adj.虔诚的;道貌岸然的 | |
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23 ailment | |
n.疾病,小病 | |
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24 neurotic | |
adj.神经病的,神经过敏的;n.神经过敏者,神经病患者 | |
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25 exclamation | |
n.感叹号,惊呼,惊叹词 | |
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26 impiety | |
n.不敬;不孝 | |
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27 ardent | |
adj.热情的,热烈的,强烈的,烈性的 | |
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28 bibliophile | |
n.爱书者;藏书家 | |
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29 erred | |
犯错误,做错事( err的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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30 emanates | |
v.从…处传出,传出( emanate的第三人称单数 );产生,表现,显示 | |
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31 domain | |
n.(活动等)领域,范围;领地,势力范围 | |
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32 remarkably | |
ad.不同寻常地,相当地 | |
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33 rivalry | |
n.竞争,竞赛,对抗 | |
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34 motive | |
n.动机,目的;adv.发动的,运动的 | |
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35 instinctive | |
adj.(出于)本能的;直觉的;(出于)天性的 | |
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36 motives | |
n.动机,目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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37 virtue | |
n.德行,美德;贞操;优点;功效,效力 | |
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38 virtues | |
美德( virtue的名词复数 ); 德行; 优点; 长处 | |
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39 possessed | |
adj.疯狂的;拥有的,占有的 | |
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40 Flared | |
adj. 端部张开的, 爆发的, 加宽的, 漏斗式的 动词flare的过去式和过去分词 | |
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41 jealousy | |
n.妒忌,嫉妒,猜忌 | |
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42 devoted | |
adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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43 tempt | |
vt.引诱,勾引,吸引,引起…的兴趣 | |
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44 draughts | |
n. <英>国际跳棋 | |
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45 virtuous | |
adj.有品德的,善良的,贞洁的,有效力的 | |
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46 lurk | |
n.潜伏,潜行;v.潜藏,潜伏,埋伏 | |
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47 grievance | |
n.怨愤,气恼,委屈 | |
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48 tragic | |
adj.悲剧的,悲剧性的,悲惨的 | |
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49 lava | |
n.熔岩,火山岩 | |
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50 belched | |
v.打嗝( belch的过去式和过去分词 );喷出,吐出;打(嗝);嗳(气) | |
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51 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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52 engenders | |
v.产生(某形势或状况),造成,引起( engender的第三人称单数 ) | |
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53 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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54 intelligible | |
adj.可理解的,明白易懂的,清楚的 | |
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55 deserted | |
adj.荒芜的,荒废的,无人的,被遗弃的 | |
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56 provocations | |
n.挑衅( provocation的名词复数 );激怒;刺激;愤怒的原因 | |
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57 sojourn | |
v./n.旅居,寄居;逗留 | |
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58 resentment | |
n.怨愤,忿恨 | |
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59 slumber | |
n.睡眠,沉睡状态 | |
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60 Founder | |
n.创始者,缔造者 | |
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61 psychology | |
n.心理,心理学,心理状态 | |
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62 repression | |
n.镇压,抑制,抑压 | |
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63 illustrated | |
adj. 有插图的,列举的 动词illustrate的过去式和过去分词 | |
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64 proceedings | |
n.进程,过程,议程;诉讼(程序);公报 | |
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65 languishing | |
a. 衰弱下去的 | |
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66 illicit | |
adj.非法的,禁止的,不正当的 | |
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67 inexplicable | |
adj.无法解释的,难理解的 | |
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68 memoirs | |
n.回忆录;回忆录传( mem,自oir的名词复数) | |
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69 confessions | |
n.承认( confession的名词复数 );自首;声明;(向神父的)忏悔 | |
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70 imprisoned | |
下狱,监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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71 accusation | |
n.控告,指责,谴责 | |
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72 manifestations | |
n.表示,显示(manifestation的复数形式) | |
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73 ethical | |
adj.伦理的,道德的,合乎道德的 | |
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74 primal | |
adj.原始的;最重要的 | |
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75 dagger | |
n.匕首,短剑,剑号 | |
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76 brutal | |
adj.残忍的,野蛮的,不讲理的 | |
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77 doomed | |
命定的 | |
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78 frictions | |
n.摩擦( friction的名词复数 );摩擦力;冲突;不和 | |
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79 vessel | |
n.船舶;容器,器皿;管,导管,血管 | |
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80 ripples | |
逐渐扩散的感觉( ripple的名词复数 ) | |
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81 abide | |
vi.遵守;坚持;vt.忍受 | |
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82 deformed | |
adj.畸形的;变形的;丑的,破相了的 | |
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83 begot | |
v.为…之生父( beget的过去式 );产生,引起 | |
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