The majority of those I found, and noted3 down, were men who had lost former places, and were desirous of returning to them, chiefly of the better class, and government officials. In almost all the lodgings4 we entered with the landlord, we were told, “Here we need not trouble to fill up the card ourselves: the man here is able to do it, provided he is not tipsy.”
Thus summoned by Iván Fedotitch, there would
appear, from some dark corner, the once rich nobleman or official, mostly drunk, and always half-dressed. If he were not drunk, he willingly undertook the task: he kept nodding his head with a sense of importance, knitted his brows, inserted now and then learned terms in his remarks, and carefully holding in his dirty, trembling hands the neat pink card, looked round at his fellow-lodgers with pride and contempt, as if he were now, by the superiority of his education, triumphing over those who had been continually humbling6 him.
He was evidently pleased to have intercourse7 with the world which used pink cards, with a world of which he himself had once been a member.
To my questions about his life, this kind of man not only replied willingly, but with enthusiasm,—beginning to tell a story, fixed8 in his mind like a prayer, about all kinds of misfortunes which had happened to him, and chiefly about his former position, in which, considering his education, he ought to have remained.
Many such people are scattered9 about in all the tenements10 of the Rzhanoff Houses. One lodging5-house was tenanted exclusively by them, women and men. As we approached them, Iván Fedotitch said, “Now, here's where the nobility live.”
The lodging was full. Almost all the lodgers—about forty persons—were at home. In the whole house, there were no faces so ruined and degraded-looking as these,—if old, flabby; if young, pale and haggard.
I talked with several of them. Almost always the same story was told, differing only in degree of development. One and all had been once rich, or had still a rich father or brother or uncle; or either his father or his unfortunate self had held a high office. Then came some misfortune caused by envious11 enemies, or his own imprudent kindness, or some out-of-the-way occurrence; and, having lost everything, he was obliged to descend12 to these strange and hateful surroundings, among lice and rags, in company with drunkards and loose characters, feeding upon bread and liver, and subsisting13 by beggary.
All the thoughts, desires, and recollections of these men are turned toward the past. The present appears to them as something unnatural14, hideous15, and unworthy of attention. It does not exist for them. They have only recollections of the past, and expectations of the future which may be realized at any moment, and for the attainment16 of which but very little is needed; but, unfortunately, this little is out of their reach; it cannot be got
anywhere: and so one has wasted one year, another five, and a third thirty years.
One needs only to be dressed respectably in order to call on a well-known person who is kindly17 disposed toward him; another requires only to be dressed, have his debts paid, and go to some town or other; a third wants to take his effects out of pawn18, and get a small sum to carry on a law-suit, which must be decided19 in his favour, and then all will be well again. All say that they have need of some external circumstance in order to regain20 that position which they think natural and happy.
If I had not been blinded by my pride in being a benefactor21, I should have needed only to look a little closer into their faces, young and old, which were generally weak, sensual, but kind, in order to understand that their misfortunes could not be met by external means; that they could be happy in no position while their present conception of life remained the same; that they were by no means peculiar22 people in peculiarly unhappy circumstances, but that they were like all other men, ourselves included.
I remember well how my intercourse with men of this class was particularly trying to me. I now understand why it was so. In them I saw my own self as in a mirror. If I had considered carefully my own life and the lives of people of my own class, I should have seen that between us and these unfortunate men there existed no essential difference.
Those who live around me in expensive suites23 of apartments and houses of their own in the best streets of the city, eating something better than liver or herring with their bread, are none the less unhappy. They also are discontented with their lot, regret the past, and desire a happier future, precisely24 as did the wretched tenants25 of the Rzhanoff Houses. Both wished to be worked less and to be worked for more, the difference between them being only in degrees of idleness.
Unfortunately, I did not see this at first, nor did I understand that such people needed to be relieved, not by my charity, but from their own false views of the world; and that to change a man's estimate of life he must be given one more accurate than his own, which, unhappily, not possessing myself, I could not communicate to others.
These men were unhappy not because, to use an illustration, they were without nourishing food, but because their stomachs were spoiled; and they required, not
nourishment26, but a tonic27. I did not see that in order to help them, it was not necessary to give them food but to teach them how to eat. Though I am anticipating, I must say that of all these people whose names I put down I did not in reality help one, notwithstanding that everything some of them had desired was done to relieve them. Of these I became acquainted with three men in particular. All three, after many failures and much assistance, are now in the same position they were in three years ago.
点击收听单词发音
1 advantageous | |
adj.有利的;有帮助的 | |
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2 secondly | |
adv.第二,其次 | |
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3 noted | |
adj.著名的,知名的 | |
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4 lodgings | |
n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍 | |
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5 lodging | |
n.寄宿,住所;(大学生的)校外宿舍 | |
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6 humbling | |
adj.令人羞辱的v.使谦恭( humble的现在分词 );轻松打败(尤指强大的对手);低声下气 | |
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7 intercourse | |
n.性交;交流,交往,交际 | |
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8 fixed | |
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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9 scattered | |
adj.分散的,稀疏的;散步的;疏疏落落的 | |
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10 tenements | |
n.房屋,住户,租房子( tenement的名词复数 ) | |
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11 envious | |
adj.嫉妒的,羡慕的 | |
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12 descend | |
vt./vi.传下来,下来,下降 | |
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13 subsisting | |
v.(靠很少的钱或食物)维持生活,生存下去( subsist的现在分词 ) | |
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14 unnatural | |
adj.不自然的;反常的 | |
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15 hideous | |
adj.丑陋的,可憎的,可怕的,恐怖的 | |
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16 attainment | |
n.达到,到达;[常pl.]成就,造诣 | |
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17 kindly | |
adj.和蔼的,温和的,爽快的;adv.温和地,亲切地 | |
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18 pawn | |
n.典当,抵押,小人物,走卒;v.典当,抵押 | |
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19 decided | |
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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20 regain | |
vt.重新获得,收复,恢复 | |
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21 benefactor | |
n. 恩人,行善的人,捐助人 | |
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22 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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23 suites | |
n.套( suite的名词复数 );一套房间;一套家具;一套公寓 | |
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24 precisely | |
adv.恰好,正好,精确地,细致地 | |
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25 tenants | |
n.房客( tenant的名词复数 );佃户;占用者;占有者 | |
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26 nourishment | |
n.食物,营养品;营养情况 | |
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27 tonic | |
n./adj.滋补品,补药,强身的,健体的 | |
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