On each side of the drive which led down to the gateway8 grew an irregular line of these trees, here and there shading the way from side to side, and again leaving a space for the moonlight to stream upon. As he tied his horse Tredennis glanced up this drive-way toward the house.
"There is a light burning in one of the rooms," he said. "It must be there that"—He broke off in the midst of a sentence, his attention suddenly attracted by a figure which flitted across one of the patches of moonlight.
He knew it at once, though he had had no thought of seeing it before entering the house. It was Bertha, in[Pg 178] a white dress, and with two large dogs following her, leaping and panting, when she spoke9 in a hushed voice, as if to quiet them.
She came down toward the gate with a light, hurried tread, and, when she was within a few feet of it, spoke.
"Doctor," she said, "oh, how glad I am—how glad!" and, as she said it, came out into the broad moonlight again, and found herself face to face with Tredennis.
She fell back from him as if a blow had been struck her,—fell back trembling, and as white as the moonlight itself.
"What!" she cried, "is it you—you?"
He looked at her, bewildered by the shock his presence seemed to her.
"I did not think I should frighten you," he said. "I came to-night because the professor was not well enough to make the journey. Doctor Wentworth will be here in the morning. He would have come with me, but he had an important case to attend."
"I did not think you would come," she said, breathlessly, and put out her hand, groping for the support of the swinging gate, which she caught and held.
"There was no one else," he answered.
He felt as if he were part of some strange dream. The stillness, the moonlight, the heavy shadows of the great trees, all added to the unreality of the moment; but most unreal of all was Bertha herself, clinging with one trembling hand to the gate, and looking up at him with dilated10 eyes.
"I did not think you would come," she said again, "and it startled me—and"—She paused with a poor little effort at a smile, which the next instant died away. "Don't—don't look at me!" she said, and, turning away from him, laid her face on the hand clinging to the gate.
He looked down at her slight white figure and bent11 head, and a great tremor12 passed over him. The next instant she felt him standing13 close at her side.
[Pg 179]
"You must not—do that," he said, and put out his hand and touched her shoulder.
His voice was almost a whisper; he was scarcely conscious of what his words were; he had scarcely any consciousness of his touch. The feeling which swept over him needed no sense of touch or sound; the one thing which overpowered him was his sudden sense of a nearness to her which was not physical nearness at all.
"Perhaps I was wrong to come," he went on; "but I could not leave you alone—I could not leave you alone. I knew that you were suffering, and I could not bear that."
She did not speak or lift her head.
"Has it been desolate14?" he asked.
"Yes," she answered, in a hushed voice.
"I was afraid so," he said. "You have been alone so long—I thought of it almost every hour of the day; you are not used to being alone. Perhaps it was a mistake. Why do you tremble so?"
"I don't know," she answered.
"My poor child!" he said. "My poor child!" And then there was a pause which seemed to hold a lifetime of utter silence.
It was Bertha who ended it. She stirred a little, and then lifted her face. She looked as he remembered her looking when he had first known her, only that she was paler, and there was a wearied softness in her eyes. She made no attempt at hiding the traces of tears in them, and she spoke as simply as a child.
"I thought it was the doctor, when I heard the horse's feet," she said; "and I was afraid the dogs would bark and waken Janey. She has just fallen asleep, and she has slept so little. She has been very ill."
"You have not slept," he said.
"No," she replied. "This is the first time I have left her."
He took her hand and drew it gently through his arm.
[Pg 180]
"I will take you up to the house," he said, "so that you can hear every sound; but you must stay outside for a little while. The fresh air will do you good, and we can walk up and down while I tell you the reason the professor did not come."
All the ordinary conventional barriers had fallen away from between them. He did not know why or how, and he did not ask. Suddenly he found himself once again side by side with the Bertha he had fancied lost forever. All that had bewildered him was gone. The brilliant little figure, with its tinkling15 ornaments16, the unemotional little smile, the light laugh, were only parts of a feverish17 dream. It was Bertha whose hand rested on his arm—whose fair, young face was pale with watching over her child—whose soft voice was tremulous and tender with innocent, natural tears. She spoke very little. When they had walked to and fro before the house for a short time, she said:
"Let us go and sit down on the steps of the porch," and they went and sat there together,—he upon a lower step, and she a few steps above, her hands clasped on her knee, her face turned half away from him. She rarely looked at him, he noticed, even when he spoke to her or she spoke to him; her eyes rested oftener than not upon some far-away point under the trees.
"You are no better than you were when you went away," he said, looking at her cheek where the moonlight whitened it.
"No," she answered.
"I did not think to find you looking like this," he said.
"Perhaps," she said, still with her eyes fixed18 on the far-away shadows, "perhaps I have not had time enough. You must give me time."
"You have had two months," he returned.
"Two months," she said, "is not so long as it seems." And between the words there came a curious little catch of the breath.
[Pg 181]
"It has seemed long to you?" he asked.
"Yes."
She turned her face slowly and looked at him.
"Has it seemed long to you?" she said.
"Yes," he replied, "long and dreary19."
She swayed a little toward him with a sort of unconscious movement; her eyes were fixed upon his face with a wistful questioning; he had seen her look at her children so.
"Was it very hot?" she said. "Were you tired? Why did you not go away?"
"I did not want to go away," he answered.
"But you ought to have gone away," she said. "You were not used to the heat, and—Let the light fall on your face so that I can see it!"
He came a little nearer to her, and as she looked at him the wistfulness in her eyes changed to something else.
"Oh," she cried, "it has done you harm. Your face is quite changed. Why didn't I see it before? What have you been doing?"
"Nothing," he answered.
He did not stir, or want to stir, but sat almost breathlessly still, watching her, the sudden soft anxiousness in her eyes setting every pulse in his body throbbing20.
"Oh," she said, "you are ill—you are ill! How could you be so careless? Why did not papa"—
She faltered21—her voice fell and broke. She even drew back a little, though her eyes still rested upon his.
"You were angry with me when you thought I did not take care of myself," she said; "and you have been as bad as I was, and worse. You had not so many temptations. And she turned away, and he found himself looking only at her cheek again, and the soft side-curve of her mouth.
"There is less reason why I should take care of myself," he said.
[Pg 182]
"You mean"—she asked, without moving—"that there are fewer people who would miss you?"
"I do not know of any one who would miss me."
Her hands stirred slightly, as they lay in her lap.
"That is underrating your friends," she said, slowly. "But"—altering her tone—"it is true, I have the children and Richard."
"Where is Richard?" he asked.
"I don't know."
"When you heard from him last," he began.
"He is a bad correspondent," she said.
"He always finds so much to fill his time when he is away. There is an understanding between us that he shall write very few letters. I am responsible for it myself, because I know it spoils everything for him when he has an unwritten letter on his conscience. I haven't heard from him first yet since he went West."
She arose from her seat on the step.
"I will go in now," she said. "I must speak to Mrs. Lucas about giving you a room, and then I will go to Janey. She is sleeping very well."
He arose, too, and stood below her, looking up.
"You must promise not to think of me," he said. "I did not come here to be considered. Do you think an old soldier, who has slept under the open sky many a night, cannot provide for himself?"
"Have you slept so often?" she asked, the very triviality of the question giving it a strange sweetness to his ears.
"Yes," he answered. "And often with no surety of wakening with my scalp on."
"Oh!" she exclaimed, and made an involuntary movement toward him.
He barely restrained his impulse to put out his hands, but hers fell at her sides the next instant.
"I am a great coward," she said. "It fills me with[Pg 183] terror to hear of things like that. Is it at all likely that you will be ordered back?"
"I don't know," he replied, his uplifted eyes devouring22 all the sweetness of her face. "Would that"—
The very madness of the question forming itself on his lips was his own check.
"I don't want to think of it," he said. Then he added, "As I stand here I look up at you. I never looked up at you before."
"Nor I down at you," she returned. "You are always so high above me. It seems strange to look down at you."
It was all so simple and inconsequent, but every word seemed full of the mystery and emotion of the hour. When he tried afterward to recall what they had said he was bewildered by the slightness of what had been uttered, even though the thrill of it had not yet passed away.
He went up the steps and stood beside her.
"Yes," he said, speaking as gently as he might have spoken to a child. "You make me feel what a heavy-limbed, clumsy fellow I am. All women make me feel it, but you more than all the rest. You look almost like a child."
"But I am not very little," she said; "it is only because I am standing near you."
"I always think of you as a small creature," he said. "I used to think, long ago, that some one should care for you."
"You were very good, long ago," she answered softly. "And you are very good now to have come to try to help me. Will you come in?"
"No," he said, "not now. It might only excite the child to-night if she saw me, and so long as she is quiet I will not run the risk of disturbing her. I will tell you what I am going to do. I am not going to leave you alone. I shall walk up and down beneath your window, and if you need me you will know I am there, and you have only to speak in your lowest voice. If[Pg 184] she should be worse, my horse is at the gate, and I can go for the doctor at once."
She looked up at him with a kind of wonder.
"Do you mean that you intend to stand sentinel all night?" she said.
"I have stood sentinel before," was his reply. "I came to stand sentinel. All that I can do is to be ready if I am wanted."
"But I cannot let you stay up all night," she began.
"You said it had been desolate," he answered. "Won't it be less desolate to know that—that some one is near you?"
"Oh, yes! Oh, yes!" she said. "But"—
"Go upstairs," he said, "and promise me that, if she still sleeps, you will lie down and let your nurse watch her."
The gentle authority of his manner seemed to impress her curiously23. She hesitated as if she scarcely understood it.
"I—don't—know," she faltered.
"You will be better for it to-morrow," he persisted, "and so will she."
"I never did such a thing before," she said, slowly.
"I shall be beneath the open window," he said, "and I have the ears of an Indian. I shall know if she stirs."
She drew a soft, troubled breath.
"Well," she said, "I will—go."
And, without another word, she turned away. He stood and watched her as she moved slowly across the wide porch. At the door she stopped and turned toward him.
"But," she said, faint lines showing themselves on her forehead, "I shall be remembering that you—are not asleep."
"You must not remember me at all," he answered.
And then he stood still and watched her again until she had entered the house and noiselessly ascended24 the staircase, which was a few yards from the open door,[Pg 185] and then, when he could see her white figure in the darkness no more, he went out to his place beneath the window, and strode silently to and fro, keeping watch and listening until after the moon had gone down and the birds were beginning to stir in the trees.
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1
dwelling
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| n.住宅，住所，寓所 | |
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2
mansion
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| n.大厦，大楼；宅第 | |
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3
dignified
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| a.可敬的，高贵的 | |
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afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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degenerate
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| v.退步，堕落；adj.退步的，堕落的；n.堕落者 | |
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6
kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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7
soften
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| v.(使)变柔软；(使)变柔和 | |
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8
gateway
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| n.大门口，出入口，途径，方法 | |
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9
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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10
dilated
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| adj.加宽的，扩大的v.（使某物）扩大，膨胀，张大( dilate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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11
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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12
tremor
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| n.震动，颤动，战栗，兴奋，地震 | |
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13
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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14
desolate
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| adj.荒凉的，荒芜的；孤独的，凄凉的；v.使荒芜，使孤寂 | |
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15
tinkling
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| n.丁当作响声 | |
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16
ornaments
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| n.装饰( ornament的名词复数 )；点缀；装饰品；首饰v.装饰，点缀，美化( ornament的第三人称单数 ) | |
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17
feverish
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| adj.发烧的，狂热的，兴奋的 | |
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18
fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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19
dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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throbbing
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| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
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21
faltered
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| （嗓音）颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 )； 支吾其词； 蹒跚； 摇晃 | |
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22
devouring
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| 吞没( devour的现在分词 )； 耗尽； 津津有味地看； 狼吞虎咽地吃光 | |
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23
curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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24
ascended
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| v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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