Among other things, Media, who at times turned over Babbalanja for an encyclopaedia4, however unreliable, demanded information upon the subject of neap tides and their alleged5 slavish vassalage6 to the moon.
When true to his cyclopaediatic nature, Babbalanja quoted from a still older and better authority than himself; in brief, from no other than eternal Bardianna. It seems that that worthy7 essayist had discussed the whole matter in a chapter thus headed: "On Seeing into Mysteries through Mill-Stones;" and throughout his disquisitions he evinced such a profundity8 of research, though delivered in a style somewhat equivocal, that the company were much struck by the erudition displayed.
"Babbalanja, that Bardianna of yours must have been a wonderful student," said Media after a pause, "no doubt he consumed whole thickets9 of rush-lights."
"Not so, my lord.—'Patience, patience, philosophers,' said Bardianna; 'blow out your tapers10, bolt not your dinners, take time, wisdom will be plenty soon.'"
"A notable hint! Why not follow it, Babbalanja?"
"Because, my lord, I have overtaken it, and passed on."
"True to your nature, Babbalanja; you stay nowhere."
"Ay, keep moving is my motto; but speaking of hard students, did my lord ever hear of Midni the ontologist and entomologist?"
"No."
"Then, my lord, you shall hear of him now. Midni was of opinion that day-light was vulgar; good enough for taro-planting and traveling; but wholly unadapted to the sublime11 ends of study. He toiled12 by night; from sunset to sunrise poring over the works of the old logicans. Like most philosophers, Midni was an amiable13 man; but one thing invariably put him out. He read in the woods by glow-worm light; insect in hand, tracing over his pages, line by line. But glow-worms burn not long: and in the midst of some calm intricate thought, at some imminent14 comma, the insect often expired, and Midni groped for a meaning. Upon such an occasion, 'Ho, Ho,' he cried; 'but for one instant of sun- light to see my way to a period!' But sun-light there was none; so Midni sprang to his feet, and parchment under arm, raced about among the sloughs15 and bogs16 for another glow-worm. Often, making a rapid descent with his turban, he thought he had caged a prize; but nay17. Again he tried; yet with no better succcess. Nevertheless, at last he secured one; but hardly had he read three lines by its light, when out it went. Again and again this occurred. And thus he forever went halting and stumbling through his studies, and plunging18 through his quagmires19 after a glim."
At this ridiculous tale, one of our silliest paddlers burst into uncontrollable mirth. Offended at which breach20 of decorum, Media sharply rebuked21 him.
But he protested he could not help laughing.
"My lord, he is not to blame. Mark how earnestly he struggles to suppress his mirth; but he can not. It has often been the same with myself. And many a time have I not only vainly sought to check my laughter, but at some recitals23 I have both laughed and cried. But can opposite emotions be simultaneous in one being? No. I wanted to weep; but my body wanted to smile, and between us we almost choked. My lord Media, this man's body laughs; not the man himself."
"But his body is his own, Babbalanja; and he should have it under better control."
"The common error, my lord. Our souls belong to our bodies, not our bodies to our souls. For which has the care of the other? which keeps house? which looks after the replenishing of the aorta24 and auricles, and stores away the secretions25? Which toils26 and ticks while the other sleeps? Which is ever giving timely hints, and elderly warnings? Which is the most authoritative27?—Our bodies, surely. At a hint, you must move; at a notice to quit, you depart. Simpletons show us, that a body can get along almost without a soul; but of a soul getting along without a body, we have no tangible28 and indisputable proof. My lord, the wisest of us breathe involuntarily. And how many millions there are who live from day to day by the incessant29 operation of subtle processes in them, of which they know nothing, and care less? Little ween they, of vessels30 lacteal and lymphatic, of arteries31 femoral and temporal; of pericranium or pericardium; lymph, chyle, fibrin, albumen, iron in the blood, and pudding in the head; they live by the charity of their bodies, to which they are but butlers. I say, my lord, our bodies are our betters. A soul so simple, that it prefers evil to good, is lodged32 in a frame, whose minutest action is full of unsearchable wisdom. Knowing this superiority of theirs, our bodies are inclined to be willful: our beards grow in spite of us; and as every one knows, they sometimes grow on dead men."
"You mortals are alive, then, when you are dead, Babbalanja."
"No, my lord; but our beards survive us."
"An ingenious distinction; go on, philosopher."
"Without bodies, my lord, we Mardians would be minus our strongest motive-passions, those which, in some way or other, root under our every action. Hence, without bodies, we must be something else than we essentially33 are. Wherefore, that saying imputed34 to Alma, and which, by his very followers35, is deemed the most hard to believe of all his instructions, and the most at variance36 with all preconceived notions of immortality37, I Babbalanja, account the most reasonable of his doctrinal teachings. It is this;—that at the last day, every man shall rise in the flesh."
"Pray, Babbalanja, talk not of resurrections to a demi-god."
"Then let me rehearse a story, my lord. You will find it in the 'Very Merry Marvelings' of the Improvisitor Quiddi; and a quaint38 book it is. Fugle-fi is its finis:—fugle-fi, fugle-fo, fugle-fogle-orum!"
"That wild look in his eye again," murmured Yoomy. "Proceed, Azzageddi," said Media.
"The philosopher Grando had a sovereign contempt for his carcass. Often he picked a quarrel with it; and always was flying out in its disparagement39. 'Out upon you, you beggarly body! you clog40, drug, drag! You keep me from flying; I could get along better without you. Out upon you, I say, you vile41 pantry, cellar, sink, sewer42; abominable43 body! what vile thing are you not? And think you, beggar! to have the upper hand of me? Make a leg to that man if you dare, without my permission. This smell is intolerable; but turn from it, if you can, unless I give the word. Bolt this yam!—it is done. Carry me across yon field!—off we go. Stop!—it's a dead halt. There, I've trained you enough for to-day; now, sirrah, crouch44 down in the shade, and be quiet.—I'm rested. So, here's for a stroll, and a reverie homeward:— Up, carcass, and march.' So the carcass demurely45 rose and paced, and the philosopher meditated46. He was intent upon squaring the circle; but bump he came against a bough47. 'How now, clodhopping bumpkin! you would take advantage of my reveries, would you? But I'll be even with you;' and seizing a cudgel, he laid across his shoulders with right good will. But one of his backhanded thwacks injured his spinal48 cord; the philosopher dropped; but presently came to. 'Adzooks! I'll bend or break you! Up, up, and I'll run you home for this.' But wonderful to tell, his legs refused to budge49; all sensation had left them. But a huge wasp50 happening to sting his foot, not him, for he felt it not, the leg incontinently sprang into the air, and of itself, cut all manner of capers51. Be still! Down with you!' But the leg refused. 'My arms are still loyal,' thought Grando; and with them he at last managed to confine his refractory52 member. But all commands, volitions, and persuasions53, were as naught54 to induce his limbs to carry him home. It was a solitary55 place; and five days after, Grando the philosopher was found dead under a tree."
"Ha, ha!" laughed Media, "Azzageddi is full as merry as ever."
"But, my lord," continued Babbalanja, "some creatures have still more perverse56 bodies than Grando's. In the fables57 of Ridendiabola, this is to be found. 'A fresh-water Polyp, despising its marine58 existence; longed to live upon air. But all it could do, its tentacles59 or arms still continued to cram60 its stomach. By a sudden preternatural impulse, however, the Polyp at last turned itself inside out; supposing that after such a proceeding61 it would have no gastronomic62 interior. But its body proved ventricle outside as well as in. Again its arms went to work; food was tossed in, and digestion63 continued.'"
"Is the literal part of that a fact?" asked Mohi.
"True as truth," said Babbalanja; "the Polyp will live turned inside out."
"Somewhat curious, certainly," said Media.—"But me-thinks, Babbalanja, that somewhere I have heard something about organic functions, so called; which may account for the phenomena64 you mention; and I have heard too, me-thinks, of what are called reflex actions of the nerves, which, duly considered, might deprive of its strangeness that story of yours concerning Grande and his body."
"Mere65 substitutions of sounds for inexplicable66 meanings, my lord. In some things science cajoles us. Now, what is undeniable of the Polyp some physiologists67 analogically maintain with regard to us Mardians; that forasmuch, as the lining68 of our interiors is nothing more than a continuation of the epidermis69, or scarf-skin, therefore, that in a remote age, we too must have been turned wrong side out: an hypothesis, which, indirectly70 might account for our moral perversities: and also, for that otherwise nonsensical term—'the coat of the stomach;' for originally it must have been a surtout, instead of an inner garment."
"Pray, Azzageddi," said Media, "are you not a fool?"
"One of a jolly company, my lord; but some creatures besides wearing their surtouts within, sport their skeletons without: witness the lobster71 and turtle, who alive, study their own anatomies72."
"Azzageddi, you are a zany."
"Pardon, my lord," said Mohi, "I think him more of a lobster; it's hard telling his jaws73 from his claws."
"Yes, Braid-Beard, I am a lobster, a mackerel, any thing you please; but my ancestors were kangaroos, not monkeys, as old Boddo erroneously opined. My idea is more susceptible74 of demonstration75 than his. Among the deepest discovered land fossils, the relics76 of kangaroos are discernible, but no relics of men. Hence, there were no giants in those days; but on the contrary, kangaroos; and those kangaroos formed the first edition of mankind, since revised and corrected."
"The old question, Mohi. But where are the tails of the tadpoles78, after their gradual metamorphosis into frogs? Have frogs any tails, old man? Our tails, Mohi, were worn off by the process of civilization; especially at the period when our fathers began to adopt the sitting posture79: the fundamental evidence of all civilization, for neither apes, nor savages80, can be said to sit; invariably, they squat81 on their hams. Among barbarous tribes benches and settles are unknown. But, my lord Media, as your liege and loving subject I can not sufficiently82 deplore83 the deprivation84 of your royal tail. That stiff and vertebrated member, as we find it in those rustic85 kinsmen86 we have disowned, would have been useful as a supplement to your royal legs; and whereas my good lord is now fain to totter87 on two stanchions, were he only a kangaroo, like the monarchs88 of old, the majesty89 of Odo would be dignified90, by standing91 firm on a tripod."
"Babbalanja," said Mohi, "you must be the last of the kangaroos."
"I am, Mohi."
"My lord, I take it, that must have been transferred; nowadays our sex carries the purse."
"Ha, ha!"
"My lord, why this mirth? Let us be serious. Although man is no longer a kangaroo, he may be said to be an inferior species of plant. Plants proper are perhaps insensible of the circulation of their sap: we mortals are physically95 unconscious of the circulation of the blood; and for many ages were not even aware of the fact. Plants know nothing of their interiors:—three score years and ten we trundle about ours, and never get a peep at them; plants stand on their stalks:—we stalk on our legs; no plant flourishes over its dead root:—dead in the grave, man lives no longer above ground; plants die without food:—so we. And now for the difference. Plants elegantly inhale96 nourishment97, without looking it up: like lords, they stand still and are served; and though green, never suffer from the colic:—whereas, we mortals must forage98 all round for our food: we cram our insides; and are loaded down with odious99 sacks and intestines100. Plants make love and multiply; but excel us in all amorous101 enticements, wooing and winning by soft pollens102 and essences. Plants abide103 in one place, and live: we must travel or die. Plants flourish without us: we must perish without them."
"Enough Azzageddi!" cried Media. "Open not thy lips till to-morrow."'
点击收听单词发音
1 serenely | |
adv.安详地,宁静地,平静地 | |
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2 speculations | |
n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 );思考;投机活动;推断 | |
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3 pitcher | |
n.(有嘴和柄的)大水罐;(棒球)投手 | |
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4 encyclopaedia | |
n.百科全书 | |
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5 alleged | |
a.被指控的,嫌疑的 | |
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6 vassalage | |
n.家臣身份,隶属 | |
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7 worthy | |
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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8 profundity | |
n.渊博;深奥,深刻 | |
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9 thickets | |
n.灌木丛( thicket的名词复数 );丛状物 | |
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10 tapers | |
(长形物体的)逐渐变窄( taper的名词复数 ); 微弱的光; 极细的蜡烛 | |
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11 sublime | |
adj.崇高的,伟大的;极度的,不顾后果的 | |
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12 toiled | |
长时间或辛苦地工作( toil的过去式和过去分词 ); 艰难缓慢地移动,跋涉 | |
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13 amiable | |
adj.和蔼可亲的,友善的,亲切的 | |
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14 imminent | |
adj.即将发生的,临近的,逼近的 | |
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15 sloughs | |
n.沼泽( slough的名词复数 );苦难的深渊;难以改变的不良心情;斯劳(Slough)v.使蜕下或脱落( slough的第三人称单数 );舍弃;除掉;摒弃 | |
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16 bogs | |
n.沼泽,泥塘( bog的名词复数 );厕所v.(使)陷入泥沼, (使)陷入困境( bog的第三人称单数 );妨碍,阻碍 | |
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17 nay | |
adv.不;n.反对票,投反对票者 | |
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18 plunging | |
adj.跳进的,突进的v.颠簸( plunge的现在分词 );暴跌;骤降;突降 | |
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19 quagmires | |
n.沼泽地,泥潭( quagmire的名词复数 ) | |
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20 breach | |
n.违反,不履行;破裂;vt.冲破,攻破 | |
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21 rebuked | |
责难或指责( rebuke的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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22 interfere | |
v.(in)干涉,干预;(with)妨碍,打扰 | |
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23 recitals | |
n.独唱会( recital的名词复数 );独奏会;小型音乐会、舞蹈表演会等;一系列事件等的详述 | |
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24 aorta | |
n.主动脉 | |
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25 secretions | |
n.分泌(物)( secretion的名词复数 ) | |
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26 toils | |
网 | |
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27 authoritative | |
adj.有权威的,可相信的;命令式的;官方的 | |
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28 tangible | |
adj.有形的,可触摸的,确凿的,实际的 | |
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29 incessant | |
adj.不停的,连续的 | |
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30 vessels | |
n.血管( vessel的名词复数 );船;容器;(具有特殊品质或接受特殊品质的)人 | |
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31 arteries | |
n.动脉( artery的名词复数 );干线,要道 | |
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32 lodged | |
v.存放( lodge的过去式和过去分词 );暂住;埋入;(权利、权威等)归属 | |
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33 essentially | |
adv.本质上,实质上,基本上 | |
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34 imputed | |
v.把(错误等)归咎于( impute的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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35 followers | |
追随者( follower的名词复数 ); 用户; 契据的附面; 从动件 | |
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36 variance | |
n.矛盾,不同 | |
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37 immortality | |
n.不死,不朽 | |
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38 quaint | |
adj.古雅的,离奇有趣的,奇怪的 | |
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39 disparagement | |
n.轻视,轻蔑 | |
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40 clog | |
vt.塞满,阻塞;n.[常pl.]木屐 | |
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41 vile | |
adj.卑鄙的,可耻的,邪恶的;坏透的 | |
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42 sewer | |
n.排水沟,下水道 | |
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43 abominable | |
adj.可厌的,令人憎恶的 | |
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44 crouch | |
v.蹲伏,蜷缩,低头弯腰;n.蹲伏 | |
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45 demurely | |
adv.装成端庄地,认真地 | |
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46 meditated | |
深思,沉思,冥想( meditate的过去式和过去分词 ); 内心策划,考虑 | |
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47 bough | |
n.大树枝,主枝 | |
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48 spinal | |
adj.针的,尖刺的,尖刺状突起的;adj.脊骨的,脊髓的 | |
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49 budge | |
v.移动一点儿;改变立场 | |
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50 wasp | |
n.黄蜂,蚂蜂 | |
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51 capers | |
n.开玩笑( caper的名词复数 );刺山柑v.跳跃,雀跃( caper的第三人称单数 ) | |
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52 refractory | |
adj.倔强的,难驾驭的 | |
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53 persuasions | |
n.劝说,说服(力)( persuasion的名词复数 );信仰 | |
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54 naught | |
n.无,零 [=nought] | |
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55 solitary | |
adj.孤独的,独立的,荒凉的;n.隐士 | |
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56 perverse | |
adj.刚愎的;坚持错误的,行为反常的 | |
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57 fables | |
n.寓言( fable的名词复数 );神话,传说 | |
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58 marine | |
adj.海的;海生的;航海的;海事的;n.水兵 | |
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59 tentacles | |
n.触手( tentacle的名词复数 );触角;触须;触毛 | |
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60 cram | |
v.填塞,塞满,临时抱佛脚,为考试而学习 | |
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61 proceeding | |
n.行动,进行,(pl.)会议录,学报 | |
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62 gastronomic | |
adj.美食(烹饪)法的,烹任学的 | |
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63 digestion | |
n.消化,吸收 | |
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64 phenomena | |
n.现象 | |
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65 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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66 inexplicable | |
adj.无法解释的,难理解的 | |
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67 physiologists | |
n.生理学者( physiologist的名词复数 );生理学( physiology的名词复数 );生理机能 | |
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68 lining | |
n.衬里,衬料 | |
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69 epidermis | |
n.表皮 | |
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70 indirectly | |
adv.间接地,不直接了当地 | |
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71 lobster | |
n.龙虾,龙虾肉 | |
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72 anatomies | |
n.解剖( anatomy的名词复数 );(详细的)分析;(生物体的)解剖结构;人体 | |
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73 jaws | |
n.口部;嘴 | |
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74 susceptible | |
adj.过敏的,敏感的;易动感情的,易受感动的 | |
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75 demonstration | |
n.表明,示范,论证,示威 | |
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76 relics | |
[pl.]n.遗物,遗迹,遗产;遗体,尸骸 | |
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77 wriggling | |
v.扭动,蠕动,蜿蜒行进( wriggle的现在分词 );(使身体某一部位)扭动;耍滑不做,逃避(应做的事等);蠕蠕 | |
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78 tadpoles | |
n.蝌蚪( tadpole的名词复数 ) | |
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79 posture | |
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势 | |
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80 savages | |
未开化的人,野蛮人( savage的名词复数 ) | |
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81 squat | |
v.蹲坐,蹲下;n.蹲下;adj.矮胖的,粗矮的 | |
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82 sufficiently | |
adv.足够地,充分地 | |
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83 deplore | |
vt.哀叹,对...深感遗憾 | |
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84 deprivation | |
n.匮乏;丧失;夺去,贫困 | |
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85 rustic | |
adj.乡村的,有乡村特色的;n.乡下人,乡巴佬 | |
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86 kinsmen | |
n.家属,亲属( kinsman的名词复数 ) | |
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87 totter | |
v.蹒跚, 摇摇欲坠;n.蹒跚的步子 | |
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88 monarchs | |
君主,帝王( monarch的名词复数 ) | |
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89 majesty | |
n.雄伟,壮丽,庄严,威严;最高权威,王权 | |
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90 dignified | |
a.可敬的,高贵的 | |
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91 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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92 witty | |
adj.机智的,风趣的 | |
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93 conceit | |
n.自负,自高自大 | |
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94 pouch | |
n.小袋,小包,囊状袋;vt.装...入袋中,用袋运输;vi.用袋送信件 | |
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95 physically | |
adj.物质上,体格上,身体上,按自然规律 | |
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96 inhale | |
v.吸入(气体等),吸(烟) | |
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97 nourishment | |
n.食物,营养品;营养情况 | |
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98 forage | |
n.(牛马的)饲料,粮草;v.搜寻,翻寻 | |
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99 odious | |
adj.可憎的,讨厌的 | |
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100 intestines | |
n.肠( intestine的名词复数 ) | |
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101 amorous | |
adj.多情的;有关爱情的 | |
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102 pollens | |
n.花粉( pollen的名词复数 ) | |
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103 abide | |
vi.遵守;坚持;vt.忍受 | |
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