After successfully carrying through the purchase of mourning stationery2 and attending to other important items connected with sorrow in its worldly shape, Arthur Agar went back to Cambridge. There was enough of the woman in his nature to enable him to cherish grief and nurse it lovingly, as some women (not the best of them) do. In this attitude towards the world there was none of that dogged going about his business which characterises the ordinary man from whose life something has slipped out.
He wandered by the banks of the Cam with mourning in his mien3, and his cherished friends took sympathetic coffee with him after Hall. They spoke4 of Jem with that fervid5 admiration6 which University men honestly feel for one a few years their senior who has already “done something.”
“A ripping soldier” they called him and some of them entertained serious doubts as to whether they had done wisely in choosing the less glorious paths of peace. And Arthur Agar settled down into the old profitless life, with this difference—that he could not dine out, that he used blackedged notepaper, and that his delicate heliotrope7 neckties were folded away in a drawer until such time as his grief should be assuaged8 into that state of resignation technically9 called half-mourning.
One afternoon well towards the end of the term Arthur Agar's “gyp” crept in with that valet-like confidential10 air which seems to be bred of too intimate a knowledge of the extent of one's wardrobe.
“There is a gentleman, sir,” he said, “as wants to see you. But in no wise will he give his name, which, he says, you don't know it.”
“Is he selling engravings?” asked Arthur.
The “gyp” looked mildly offended. As if he didn't know that sort!
“No, sir. Military man, I should take it.”
Arthur Agar had met the Scotch11 Balaclava veteran in his time too. He hesitated, and the “gyp,” who felt that his reputation was at stake, spoke:
“Well, then, show him up.”
A moment later a man who might have been the wandering Jew fin13 de siècle stood in the doorway14. His smart military moustache was small and evidently trimmed, his face was sunburnt, and in his eyes there gleamed the restlessness of India.
He bowed, and awaited the exit of the man. Then, coming forward, he was able for the first time to see Arthur Agar's face distinctly, and his glance wavered.
At that moment Arthur Agar was staring at him with something in his face that was almost strong. When this man had entered the room, Arthur felt his heart give one great bound which almost choked him. There was a strange physical feeling of vacuity15 in his breast which seemed to paralyse his breathing powers, and his temples throbbed16 painfully.
Arthur Agar's life had been passed in eminently pleasant places. The seamy side of existence had always been carefully hidden from his eyes. He therefore did not recognise this strange sense which had leapt into his being—the sense of superhuman, physical, mortal revulsion.
He was divided between two instincts. One side of his nature urged him to shriek17 like a woman. Had he followed the other, he would have rushed at this man, whom he had never seen before, seeking to do him bodily harm. He would not have paused to reason that in anything like a struggle he would stand no chance against the sinewy18, dark-eyed soldier who stood watching him. For there are moments even in this age of self-suppression when we do not pause to think, when he who cannot swim will leap into deep water to save another.
This sudden unreasoning hatred19, so foreign to his gentle nature, seemed to stagger Arthur Agar as the sudden intimation of some mortal disease lurking20 in his own being would have done. He gripped the back of the spindle-legged chair, and could find no word to say. The stranger it was who spoke.
“I presume,” he said, with a pleasant smile, in a voice so musical that his hearer breathed suddenly as if his head had been lifted from water, “I presume that you are Mr. Arthur Agar?”
While he spoke he looked past Arthur, out of the silken-draped window. He did not seem to like the glance of this young man, for even the most practical of us have a conscience at times.
“Yes.”
The new-comer laid his walking-stick on the table, and turned to make sure that the door was closed.
“I knew your step-brother,” he explained, “Jem Agar, in India.”
Then the instinct of the gentleman and the host asserted itself over and above the throbbing21 hatred.
“Ah! Will you sit down?”
The stranger took the proffered22 chair and laid aside his hat. But neither of them was at ease. There was a subtle suggestion that they had met before and quarrelled—vague, unreasoning, quite impossible if you will; but it was there. They were as men meeting again with a past between them (too full of strong passions ever to be forgotten) which each was trying in vain to ignore.
“I have brought home a few belongings23 of his,” the stranger went on to explain. “Just a port-manteau with some clothes and things.”
He paused, and drew a small packet from the pocket of a covert-coat which he carried over his arm.
“Here,” he went on, “are some papers of his—a diary and one or two letters. The rest of the things are at my hotel in town.”
Arthur took the packet, and, still in the same dreamy, unreal way, opened it. He turned to the last entry—dated six weeks back.
“Got out of bed at five, but nothing to be seen in the valley. I feel a bit chippy this morning. If nothing turns up to-day shall begin to feel uneasy. The men seem all right. They are plucky24 little fellows.”
There was a self-consciousness about Jem Agar's diary, a selection of the right word, which conveyed nothing to Arthur. But it fell into other hands later on, where it was understood better.
General Michael was watching the undergraduate with the same critical attention which he had brought to bear on the writer of the diary not two months before.
Arthur looked up. He was getting accustomed to the loathing26 that he felt for this man, as one gets accustomed to an evil odour or a physical pain.
“I saw enough of him to be very fond of him,” he replied.
“And your mother—was she attached to him? Excuse my asking; I have a reason.”
The little pause was enough. Seymour Michael had expected as much.
He had never forgiven Mrs. Agar the insults she heaped upon his head in the drawing-room of Jaggery House. It is very difficult to bring shame home to a Jew, and on that occasion this son of the modern Ishmaelites had been thoroughly27 ashamed of himself. The sting of that past ignominy was with him still, and would remain within his heart until such time as he could revenge himself.
With that mean, underhand watchfulness28 for an opportunity which is almost excusable in one of the unfortunates against whom every man's hand is raised to-day, he had never parted with his thirst for revenge. The moment seemed propitious29. It was within his power to lay for Anna Agar one of those spiteful feminine traps of which a woman can only fully1 appreciate the sting.
He determined30 to leave Mrs. Agar in ignorance of the real facts respecting her step-son. His vengeance31 was to allow her to rejoice—almost openly, as she did—in the stroke of fortune by which her own son, Arthur, had become possessed32 of Stagholme. He knew the woman well enough to foresee that in a hundred ways she would heap up ignominy, meanness, deception33, which would crumble34 in one vast wreck35 about her head when Jem Agar returned.
It was a vengeance worthy36 of the man, and spiteful enough to be fully comprehended by its victim. But, like others handling petards, Seymour Michael grew somewhat careless, and forgot that the wrong man is sometimes hoist37.
He knew his position well enough to make all safe as regarded Jem Agar on his return. It was absolutely necessary to tell Arthur Agar—necessary for his own safety in the future. The other two persons to whom the secret was to be imparted were Mrs. Agar and Dora Glynde. From Mrs. Agar Seymour Michael determined to withhold38 the news for his own reasons. Dora was to be kept in the dark because she was a woman, and therefore unsafe.
This was the plan in its original shape with which Michael sought out Arthur Agar at his rooms in college at Cambridge. It was further assisted and elaborated by a circumstance which the originator could scarcely have been expected to foresee—the fact of Arthur Agar's love for Dora, which was at this time beginning to take to itself a definite existence. It began, as all love does, with a want more or less elevated according to the nature of the wanter. Arthur Agar required some one for whom to buy those small and feminine luxuries which he could not for manly39 shame purchase to himself. He delighted in spending money in those establishments tersely40 called magasins de luxe in the country from whence their contents do emanate41. He therefore got into the habit of “picking up little things” for Dora, with the result that she in her turn picked up that very small object, his heart.
Michael had seen enough of Arthur Agar during this short interview to endow him with the same need of contempt which he had entertained towards Anna Agar, the mother. The strong personal resemblance, the obvious weakness of the boy's face, and, above all, that sense of having the upper hand, which makes brave men out of cowards, gave him confidence. It seemed that he had only to play the cards thrust into his hand.
“I knew,” he pursued, “Jem Agar very well. He was a peculiar42 man: very quiet, very reserved, and just the man to make a difficult position rather more difficult.”
Arthur's intelligence was not keen enough to follow the drift of this remark.
“Yes,” he said gently.
“He hinted to me once or twice,” went on Seymour Michael, “that things were not very harmonious43 at home.”
“I was not aware of it,” answered Arthur, whose innate44 gentlemanliness told him that this should be held sacred ground.
The General shifted his position.
“He was a first-rate soldier,” he said warmly.
It was obvious to both that they were not getting on. Something seemed to hold them both back, paralysing the savoir-faire which both had acquired in their intercourse45 with the world. Seymour Michael was puzzled. He was not afraid of this boy. He knew himself to be stronger—capable of over-mastering him entirely46. But for the first time in his life he felt awkward and ill at ease.
Arthur Agar only wanted this man to go. He felt that he could forego the news which he must undoubtedly47 be in a position to give if only he could be rid of this hated presence. At moments the loathing came to him again, like a cold hand laid upon his heart.
“Were you with him,” inquired the undergraduate, “at the time of his—death?”
“No. I was at head-quarters, forty miles to the rear.”
There was a little pause, then suddenly Seymour Michael leant forward with his two hands on the table that stood between them.
“Mr. Agar,” he said, “are you able to keep a secret?”
“I suppose so,” answered Agar apprehensively48.
“Then I am going to tell you something which you must swear by all that you hold most sacred to keep a strict secret until such time as I give you leave to reveal it.”
Arthur looked at him with a vague fear in his face. It seemed suddenly as if this man had always been in his life—as if he would never go out of it again.
“I am not sure that I care to hear it,” he wavered.
“You must hear it. Almost the last words that Jem Agar spoke to me were requesting me to tell you this.”
“You promise that that is true?”
Arthur was surprised at his own suspicions. It was so unlike him, whose nature, too weak to compass vice49, had never allowed the suspicion of vice or deceit in others to trouble him.
“I promise,” replied Seymour Michael.
Arthur gathered himself together for an effort. His distrust of this man was almost a panic.
“Then tell me,” he said.
Michael leant back in his chair, fixing his pleasant eyes on Arthur's pale face.
“The estate is not yours,” he said. “Your step-brother, Jem Agar, is not dead.”
“Not dead!” repeated Arthur, without any joy in his voice. “Not dead! Then who are you? Tell me who you are!”
“Ah! That I cannot tell you.”
And Seymour Michael sat smiling quietly on Anna Agar's son.
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1
fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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stationery
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| n.文具；(配套的)信笺信封 | |
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mien
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| n.风采；态度 | |
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4
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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fervid
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| adj.热情的；炽热的 | |
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admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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7
heliotrope
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| n.天芥菜；淡紫色 | |
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assuaged
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| v.减轻( assuage的过去式和过去分词 )；缓和；平息；使安静 | |
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technically
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| adv.专门地，技术上地 | |
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confidential
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| adj.秘（机）密的，表示信任的，担任机密工作的 | |
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11
scotch
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| n.伤口，刻痕；苏格兰威士忌酒；v.粉碎，消灭，阻止；adj.苏格兰(人)的 | |
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eminently
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| adv.突出地；显著地；不寻常地 | |
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fin
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| n.鳍；(飞机的)安定翼 | |
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doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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15
vacuity
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| n.(想象力等)贫乏，无聊，空白 | |
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throbbed
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| 抽痛( throb的过去式和过去分词 )； （心脏、脉搏等）跳动 | |
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shriek
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| v./n.尖叫，叫喊 | |
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sinewy
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| adj.多腱的，强壮有力的 | |
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hatred
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| n.憎恶，憎恨，仇恨 | |
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lurking
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| 潜在 | |
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throbbing
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| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
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proffered
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| v.提供，贡献，提出( proffer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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belongings
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| n.私人物品，私人财物 | |
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plucky
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| adj.勇敢的 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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loathing
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| n.厌恶，憎恨v.憎恨，厌恶( loathe的现在分词)；极不喜欢 | |
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thoroughly
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| adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地 | |
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28
watchfulness
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| 警惕，留心； 警觉（性） | |
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propitious
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| adj.吉利的；顺利的 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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vengeance
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| n.报复，报仇，复仇 | |
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32
possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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deception
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| n.欺骗，欺诈；骗局，诡计 | |
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34
crumble
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| vi.碎裂，崩溃；vt.弄碎，摧毁 | |
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wreck
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| n.失事，遇难；沉船；vt.(船等)失事，遇难 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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hoist
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| n.升高，起重机，推动；v.升起，升高，举起 | |
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38
withhold
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| v.拒绝，不给；使停止，阻挡 | |
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manly
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| adj.有男子气概的；adv.男子般地，果断地 | |
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40
tersely
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| adv. 简捷地, 简要地 | |
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41
emanate
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| v.发自，来自，出自 | |
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42
peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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43
harmonious
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| adj.和睦的，调和的，和谐的，协调的 | |
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44
innate
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| adj.天生的，固有的，天赋的 | |
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45
intercourse
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| n.性交；交流，交往，交际 | |
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46
entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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47
undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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48
apprehensively
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| adv.担心地 | |
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49
vice
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| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
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