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INTRODUCTORY BOOTSTRAP-LIFTING
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 Bootstrap-lifting? says the reader.
 
It is a vision I have seen: upon a vast plain, men and women are gathered in dense1 throngs2, crouched4 in uncomfortable and distressing6 positions, their fingers hooked in the straps7 of their boots. They are engaged in lifting themselves; tugging9 and straining until they grow red in the face, exhausted10. The perspiration11 streams from their foreheads, they show every symptom of distress5; the eyes of all are fixed12, not upon each other, nor upon their boot-straps, but upon the sky above. There is a look of rapture13 upon their faces, and now and then, amid grunts14 and groans15, they cry out with excitement and triumph.
I approach one and say to him, "Friend, what is this you are doing?"
He answers, without pausing to glance at me, "I am performing spiritual exercises. See how I rise?"
"But," I say, "you are not rising at all!"
Whereat he becomes instantly angry. "You are one of the scoffers!"
"But, friend," I protest, "don't you feel the earth under your feet?"
"You are a materialist16!"
"But, friend, I can see—"
"You are without spiritual vision!"
And so I move on among the sweating and groaning17 hordes18. Being of a sympathetic turn of mind, I cannot help being distressed19 by the prevalence of this singular practice among so large a portion of the human race. How is it possible that none of them should suspect the futility20 of their procedure? Or can it really be that I am uncomprehending? That in some way they are actually getting off the ground, or about to get off the ground?
Then I observe a new phenomenon: a man gliding21 here and there among the bootstrap-lifters, approaching from the rear and slipping his hands into their pockets. The position of the spiritual exercisers greatly facilitates his work; their eyes being cast up to heaven, they do not see him, their thoughts being occupied, they do not heed22 him; he goes through their pockets at leisure, and transfers the contents to a bag he carries, and then moves on to the next victim. I watch him for a while, and finally approach and ask, "What are you doing, sir?"
He answers, "I am picking pockets."
"Oh," I say, puzzled by his matter-of-course tone. "But—I beg pardon—are you a thief?"
"Oh, no," hie answers, smilingly, "I am the agent of the Wholesale23 Pickpockets24' Association. This is Prosperity."
"I see," I reply. "And these people let you—"
"It is the law," he says. "It is also the gospel."
I turn, following his glance, and observe another person approaching—a stately figure, clad in scarlet26 and purple robes, moving with slow dignity. He gazes about at the sweating and grunting27 hordes; now and then he stops and lifts his hands in a gesture of benediction28, and proclaims in rolling tones, "Blessed are the Bootstrap-lifters, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven." He moves on, and after a bit stops and announces again, "Man doth not live by bread alone, but by every word that cometh out of the mouth of the prophets and priests of Bootstrap-lifting."
Watching a while longer, I see this majestic29 one approach the agent of the Wholesale Pickpockets' Association. The agent greets him as a friend, and proceeds to transfer to the pockets of his capacious robes a generous share of the loot which he has collected. The majestic one does not cringe, nor does he make any effort to hide what is going on. On the contrary he cries aloud, "It is more blessed to give than to receive!" And again he cries, "The laborer30 is worthy31 of his hire!" And a third time he cries, yet more sternly, "Render unto Caesar the things which are Caesar's!" And the Bootstrap-lifters pause long enough to answer: "Lord have mercy upon us, and incline our hearts to keep this law!" Then they renew their straining and tugging.
I step up, and in timid tones begin, "Reverend sir, will you tell me by what right you take this wealth?"
Instantly a frown comes upon his face, and he cries in a voice of thunder, "Blasphemer!" And all the Bootstrap-lifters desist from their lifting, and menace me with furious looks. There is a general call for a policeman of the Wholesale Pickpockets' Association; and so I fall silent, and slink away in the throng3, and thereafter keep my thoughts to myself.
Over the vast plain I wander, observing a thousand strange and incredible and terrifying manifestations32 of the Bootstrap-lifting impulse. There is, I discover, a regular propaganda on foot; a long time ago—no man can recall how far back—the Wholesale Pickpockets made the discovery of the ease with which a man's pockets could be rifled while he was preoccupied33 with spiritual exercises, and they began offering prizes for the best essays in support of the practice. Now their propaganda is everywhere triumphant34, and year by year we see an increase in the rewards and emoluments35 of the prophets and priests of the cult36. The ground is covered with stately temples of various designs, all of which I am told are consecrated37 to Bootstrap-lifting. I come to where a group of people are occupied in laying the corner-stone of a new white marble structure; I inquire and am informed it is the First Church of Bootstrap-lifters, Scientist. As I stand watching, a card is handed to me, informing me that a lady will do my Bootstrap-lifting at five dollars per lift.
I go on to another building, which I am told is a library containing volumes in defense38 of the Bootstrap-lifters, published under the auspices39 of the Wholesale Pickpockets. I enter, and find endless vistas40 of shelves, also several thousand current magazines and papers. I consult these—for my legs have given out in the effort to visit and inspect all phases of the Bootstrap-lifting practice. I discover that hardly a week passes that some one does not start a new cult, or revive an old one; if I had a hundred life-times I could not know all the creeds41 and ceremonies, the services and rituals, the litanies and liturgies42, the hymns43, anthems44 and offertories of Bootstrap-lifting. There are the Holy Roman Bootstrap-lifters, whose priests are fed by Transubstantiation; the established Anglican Bootstrap-lifters, whose priests live by "livings"; the Baptist Bootstrap-lifters, whose preachers practice total immersion45 in Standard Oil. There are Yogi Bootstrap-lifters with flowing robes of yellow silk; Theosophist Bootstrap-lifters with green and purple auras; Mormon Bootstrap-lifters, Mazdaznan Bootstrap-lifters, Spiritualist and Spirit-Fruit, Millerite and Dowieite, Holy Roller and Holy Jumper, Come-to-glory negro, Billy Sunday base-ball and Salvation46 Army bass-drum Bootstrap-lifters. There are the thousand varieties of "New Thought" Bootstrap-lifters; the mystic and transcendentalist, Swedenborgian and Jacob Boehme Bootstrap-lifters; the Elbert Hubbard high-art Bootstrap-lifters with half a million magazinelets at two bits apiece; the "uplift" and "optimist," the Ralph Waldo Trine and Orison Swett Marden Bootstrap-lifters with a hundred thousand volumes at one dollar per volume. There are the Platonist and Hegelian and Kantian professors of collegiate metaphysical Bootstrap-lifting at several thousand dollars per year each. There are the Nietzschean Bootstrap-lifters, who lift themselves to the Superman, and the art-for-art's-sake, neo-Pagan Bootstrap-lifters, who lift themselves down to the Ape.
Excepting possibly the last-mentioned group, the priests of all these cults47, the singers, shouters, prayers and exhorters of Bootstrap-lifting have as their distinguishing characteristic that they do very little lifting at their own bootstraps, and less at any other man's. Now and then you may see one bend and give a delicate tug8, of a purely49 symbolical50 character: as when the Supreme51 Pontiff of the Roman Bootstrap-lifters comes once a year to wash the feet of the poor; or when the Sunday-school Superintendent52 of the Baptist Bootstrap-lifters shakes the hand of one of his Colorado mine-slaves. But for the most part the priests and preachers of Bootstrap-lifting walk haughtily53 erect54, many of them being so swollen55 with prosperity that they could not reach their bootstraps if they wanted to. Their role in life is to exhort48 other men to more vigorous efforts at self-elevation, that the agents of the Wholesale Pickpockets' Association may ply25 their immemorial role with less chance of interference.

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 dense aONzX     
a.密集的,稠密的,浓密的;密度大的
参考例句:
  • The general ambushed his troops in the dense woods. 将军把部队埋伏在浓密的树林里。
  • The path was completely covered by the dense foliage. 小路被树叶厚厚地盖了一层。
2 throngs 5e6c4de77c525e61a9aea0c24215278d     
n.人群( throng的名词复数 )v.成群,挤满( throng的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • She muscled through the throngs of people, frantically searching for David. 她使劲挤过人群,拼命寻找戴维。 来自辞典例句
  • Our friends threaded their way slowly through the throngs upon the Bridge. 我们这两位朋友在桥上从人群中穿过,慢慢地往前走。 来自辞典例句
3 throng sGTy4     
n.人群,群众;v.拥挤,群集
参考例句:
  • A patient throng was waiting in silence.一大群耐心的人在静静地等着。
  • The crowds thronged into the mall.人群涌进大厅。
4 crouched 62634c7e8c15b8a61068e36aaed563ab     
v.屈膝,蹲伏( crouch的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • He crouched down beside her. 他在她的旁边蹲了下来。
  • The lion crouched ready to pounce. 狮子蹲下身,准备猛扑。
5 distress 3llzX     
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛
参考例句:
  • Nothing could alleviate his distress.什么都不能减轻他的痛苦。
  • Please don't distress yourself.请你不要忧愁了。
6 distressing cuTz30     
a.使人痛苦的
参考例句:
  • All who saw the distressing scene revolted against it. 所有看到这种悲惨景象的人都对此感到难过。
  • It is distressing to see food being wasted like this. 这样浪费粮食令人痛心。
7 straps 1412cf4c15adaea5261be8ae3e7edf8e     
n.带子( strap的名词复数 );挎带;肩带;背带v.用皮带捆扎( strap的第三人称单数 );用皮带抽打;包扎;给…打绷带
参考例句:
  • the shoulder straps of her dress 她连衣裙上的肩带
  • The straps can be adjusted to suit the wearer. 这些背带可进行调整以适合使用者。
8 tug 5KBzo     
v.用力拖(或拉);苦干;n.拖;苦干;拖船
参考例句:
  • We need to tug the car round to the front.我们需要把那辆车拉到前面。
  • The tug is towing three barges.那只拖船正拖着三只驳船。
9 tugging 1b03c4e07db34ec7462f2931af418753     
n.牵引感v.用力拉,使劲拉,猛扯( tug的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • Tom was tugging at a button-hole and looking sheepish. 汤姆捏住一个钮扣眼使劲地拉,样子显得很害羞。 来自英汉文学 - 汤姆历险
  • She kicked him, tugging his thick hair. 她一边踢他,一边扯着他那浓密的头发。 来自辞典例句
10 exhausted 7taz4r     
adj.极其疲惫的,精疲力尽的
参考例句:
  • It was a long haul home and we arrived exhausted.搬运回家的这段路程特别长,到家时我们已筋疲力尽。
  • Jenny was exhausted by the hustle of city life.珍妮被城市生活的忙乱弄得筋疲力尽。
11 perspiration c3UzD     
n.汗水;出汗
参考例句:
  • It is so hot that my clothes are wet with perspiration.天太热了,我的衣服被汗水湿透了。
  • The perspiration was running down my back.汗从我背上淌下来。
12 fixed JsKzzj     
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的
参考例句:
  • Have you two fixed on a date for the wedding yet?你们俩选定婚期了吗?
  • Once the aim is fixed,we should not change it arbitrarily.目标一旦确定,我们就不应该随意改变。
13 rapture 9STzG     
n.狂喜;全神贯注;着迷;v.使狂喜
参考例句:
  • His speech was received with rapture by his supporters.他的演说受到支持者们的热烈欢迎。
  • In the midst of his rapture,he was interrupted by his father.他正欢天喜地,被他父亲打断了。
14 grunts c00fd9006f1464bcf0f544ccda70d94b     
(猪等)作呼噜声( grunt的第三人称单数 ); (指人)发出类似的哼声; 咕哝着说; 石鲈
参考例句:
  • With grunts of anguish Ogilvie eased his bulk to a sitting position. 奥格尔维苦恼地哼着,伸个懒腰坐了起来。
  • Linda fired twice A trio of Grunts assembling one mortar fell. 琳达击发两次。三个正在组装迫击炮的咕噜人倒下了。
15 groans 41bd40c1aa6a00b4445e6420ff52b6ad     
n.呻吟,叹息( groan的名词复数 );呻吟般的声音v.呻吟( groan的第三人称单数 );发牢骚;抱怨;受苦
参考例句:
  • There were loud groans when he started to sing. 他刚开始歌唱时有人发出了很大的嘘声。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • It was a weird old house, full of creaks and groans. 这是所神秘而可怕的旧宅,到处嘎吱嘎吱作响。 来自《简明英汉词典》
16 materialist 58861c5dbfd6863f4fafa38d1335beb2     
n. 唯物主义者
参考例句:
  • Promote materialist dialectics and oppose metaphysics and scholasticism. 要提倡唯物辩证法,反对形而上学和烦琐哲学。
  • Whoever denies this is not a materialist. 谁要是否定这一点,就不是一个唯物主义者。
17 groaning groaning     
adj. 呜咽的, 呻吟的 动词groan的现在分词形式
参考例句:
  • She's always groaning on about how much she has to do. 她总抱怨自己干很多活儿。
  • The wounded man lay there groaning, with no one to help him. 受伤者躺在那里呻吟着,无人救助。
18 hordes 8694e53bd6abdd0ad8c42fc6ee70f06f     
n.移动着的一大群( horde的名词复数 );部落
参考例句:
  • There are always hordes of tourists here in the summer. 夏天这里总有成群结队的游客。
  • Hordes of journalists jostled for position outside the conference hall. 大群记者在会堂外争抢位置。 来自《简明英汉词典》
19 distressed du1z3y     
痛苦的
参考例句:
  • He was too distressed and confused to answer their questions. 他非常苦恼而困惑,无法回答他们的问题。
  • The news of his death distressed us greatly. 他逝世的消息使我们极为悲痛。
20 futility IznyJ     
n.无用
参考例句:
  • She could see the utter futility of trying to protest. 她明白抗议是完全无用的。
  • The sheer futility of it all exasperates her. 它毫无用处,这让她很生气。
21 gliding gliding     
v. 滑翔 adj. 滑动的
参考例句:
  • Swans went gliding past. 天鹅滑行而过。
  • The weather forecast has put a question mark against the chance of doing any gliding tomorrow. 天气预报对明天是否能举行滑翔表示怀疑。
22 heed ldQzi     
v.注意,留意;n.注意,留心
参考例句:
  • You must take heed of what he has told.你要注意他所告诉的事。
  • For the first time he had to pay heed to his appearance.这是他第一次非得注意自己的外表不可了。
23 wholesale Ig9wL     
n.批发;adv.以批发方式;vt.批发,成批出售
参考例句:
  • The retail dealer buys at wholesale and sells at retail.零售商批发购进货物,以零售价卖出。
  • Such shoes usually wholesale for much less.这种鞋批发出售通常要便宜得多。
24 pickpockets 37fb2f0394a2a81364293698413394ce     
n.扒手( pickpocket的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Crowded markets are a happy hunting ground for pickpockets. 拥挤的市场是扒手大展身手的好地方。
  • He warned me against pickpockets. 他让我提防小偷。 来自《简明英汉词典》
25 ply DOqxa     
v.(搬运工等)等候顾客,弯曲
参考例句:
  • Taxis licensed to ply for hire at the railway station.许可计程车在火车站候客。
  • Ferryboats ply across the English Channel.渡船定期往返于英吉利海峡。
26 scarlet zD8zv     
n.深红色,绯红色,红衣;adj.绯红色的
参考例句:
  • The scarlet leaves of the maples contrast well with the dark green of the pines.深红的枫叶和暗绿的松树形成了明显的对比。
  • The glowing clouds are growing slowly pale,scarlet,bright red,and then light red.天空的霞光渐渐地淡下去了,深红的颜色变成了绯红,绯红又变为浅红。
27 grunting ae2709ef2cd9ee22f906b0a6a6886465     
咕哝的,呼噜的
参考例句:
  • He pulled harder on the rope, grunting with the effort. 他边用力边哼声,使出更大的力气拉绳子。
  • Pigs were grunting and squealing in the yard. 猪在院子里哼哼地叫个不停。
28 benediction 6Q4y0     
n.祝福;恩赐
参考例句:
  • The priest pronounced a benediction over the couple at the end of the marriage ceremony.牧师在婚礼结束时为新婚夫妇祈求上帝赐福。
  • He went abroad with his parents' benediction.他带着父母的祝福出国去了。
29 majestic GAZxK     
adj.雄伟的,壮丽的,庄严的,威严的,崇高的
参考例句:
  • In the distance rose the majestic Alps.远处耸立着雄伟的阿尔卑斯山。
  • He looks majestic in uniform.他穿上军装显得很威风。
30 laborer 52xxc     
n.劳动者,劳工
参考例句:
  • Her husband had been a farm laborer.她丈夫以前是个农场雇工。
  • He worked as a casual laborer and did not earn much.他当临时工,没有赚多少钱。
31 worthy vftwB     
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的
参考例句:
  • I did not esteem him to be worthy of trust.我认为他不值得信赖。
  • There occurred nothing that was worthy to be mentioned.没有值得一提的事发生。
32 manifestations 630b7ac2a729f8638c572ec034f8688f     
n.表示,显示(manifestation的复数形式)
参考例句:
  • These were manifestations of the darker side of his character. 这些是他性格阴暗面的表现。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • To be wordly-wise and play safe is one of the manifestations of liberalism. 明哲保身是自由主义的表现之一。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
33 preoccupied TPBxZ     
adj.全神贯注的,入神的;被抢先占有的;心事重重的v.占据(某人)思想,使对…全神贯注,使专心于( preoccupy的过去式)
参考例句:
  • He was too preoccupied with his own thoughts to notice anything wrong. 他只顾想着心事,没注意到有什么不对。
  • The question of going to the Mount Tai preoccupied his mind. 去游泰山的问题盘踞在他心头。 来自《简明英汉词典》
34 triumphant JpQys     
adj.胜利的,成功的;狂欢的,喜悦的
参考例句:
  • The army made a triumphant entry into the enemy's capital.部队胜利地进入了敌方首都。
  • There was a positively triumphant note in her voice.她的声音里带有一种极为得意的语气。
35 emoluments eaa2355fcb5f099421e4dac05c4aa7ec     
n.报酬,薪水( emolument的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The emoluments of this profession is not satisfactory. 此行业的报酬不令人满意。 来自辞典例句
  • Emoluments connected with this position include free education for the children. 与这职务有关的酬劳包括为子女提供免费教育。 来自互联网
36 cult 3nPzm     
n.异教,邪教;时尚,狂热的崇拜
参考例句:
  • Her books aren't bestsellers,but they have a certain cult following.她的书算不上畅销书,但有一定的崇拜者。
  • The cult of sun worship is probably the most primitive one.太阳崇拜仪式或许是最为原始的一种。
37 consecrated consecrated     
adj.神圣的,被视为神圣的v.把…奉为神圣,给…祝圣( consecrate的过去式和过去分词 );奉献
参考例句:
  • The church was consecrated in 1853. 这座教堂于1853年祝圣。
  • They consecrated a temple to their god. 他们把庙奉献给神。 来自《简明英汉词典》
38 defense AxbxB     
n.防御,保卫;[pl.]防务工事;辩护,答辩
参考例句:
  • The accused has the right to defense.被告人有权获得辩护。
  • The war has impacted the area with military and defense workers.战争使那个地区挤满了军队和防御工程人员。
39 auspices do0yG     
n.资助,赞助
参考例句:
  • The association is under the auspices of Word Bank.这个组织是在世界银行的赞助下办的。
  • The examination was held under the auspices of the government.这次考试是由政府主办的。
40 vistas cec5d496e70afb756a935bba3530d3e8     
长条形景色( vista的名词复数 ); 回顾; 展望; (未来可能发生的)一系列情景
参考例句:
  • This new job could open up whole new vistas for her. 这项新工作可能给她开辟全新的前景。
  • The picture is small but It'shows broad vistas. 画幅虽然不大,所表现的天地却十分广阔。
41 creeds 6087713156d7fe5873785720253dc7ab     
(尤指宗教)信条,教条( creed的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • people of all races, colours and creeds 各种种族、肤色和宗教信仰的人
  • Catholics are agnostic to the Protestant creeds. 天主教徒对于新教教义来说,是不可知论者。
42 liturgies 9c34cb6653964fe18f826fbff8228350     
n.礼拜仪式( liturgy的名词复数 );(英国国教的)祈祷书
参考例句:
  • Politicians recite their liturgies in TV studios. 政客们在电视演播室里朗诵祷文。 来自互联网
  • The Martyrium was a five nave basilica terminatedapse and a and festive liturgies were celebrated. 殉道者大殿是全部五大殿之一,一直通到另一个圆秃型的神殿人员公署。 来自互联网
43 hymns b7dc017139f285ccbcf6a69b748a6f93     
n.赞美诗,圣歌,颂歌( hymn的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • At first, they played the hymns and marches familiar to them. 起初他们只吹奏自己熟悉的赞美诗和进行曲。 来自英汉非文学 - 百科语料821
  • I like singing hymns. 我喜欢唱圣歌。 来自辞典例句
44 anthems e63efc85a8384929b8067b0278b921b5     
n.赞美诗( anthem的名词复数 );圣歌;赞歌;颂歌
参考例句:
  • They usually play the national anthems of the teams at the beginning of a big match. 在大型赛事开始前,他们通常演奏参赛国国歌。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Rise please, rise for the anthems of & . 请全体起立,奏和两国国歌。 来自互联网
45 immersion baIxf     
n.沉浸;专心
参考例句:
  • The dirt on the bottom of the bath didn't encourage total immersion.浴缸底有污垢,不宜全身浸泡于其中。
  • The wood had become swollen from prolonged immersion.因长时间浸泡,木头发胀了。
46 salvation nC2zC     
n.(尤指基督)救世,超度,拯救,解困
参考例句:
  • Salvation lay in political reform.解救办法在于政治改革。
  • Christians hope and pray for salvation.基督教徒希望并祈祷灵魂得救。
47 cults 0c174a64668dd3c452cb65d8dcda02df     
n.迷信( cult的名词复数 );狂热的崇拜;(有极端宗教信仰的)异教团体
参考例句:
  • Religious cults and priesthoods are sectarian by nature. 宗教崇拜和僧侣界天然就有派性。 来自辞典例句
  • All these religions were flourishing side by side with many less prominent cults. 所有这些宗教和许多次要的教派一起,共同繁荣。 来自英汉非文学 - 历史
48 exhort Nh5zl     
v.规劝,告诫
参考例句:
  • The opposition can only question and exhort.反对党只能提出质问和告诫。
  • This is why people exhort each other not to step into stock market.这就是为什么许多人互相告诫,不要涉足股市的原因。
49 purely 8Sqxf     
adv.纯粹地,完全地
参考例句:
  • I helped him purely and simply out of friendship.我帮他纯粹是出于友情。
  • This disproves the theory that children are purely imitative.这证明认为儿童只会单纯地模仿的理论是站不住脚的。
50 symbolical nrqwT     
a.象征性的
参考例句:
  • The power of the monarchy in Britain today is more symbolical than real. 今日英国君主的权力多为象徵性的,无甚实际意义。
  • The Lord introduces the first symbolical language in Revelation. 主说明了启示录中第一个象徵的语言。
51 supreme PHqzc     
adj.极度的,最重要的;至高的,最高的
参考例句:
  • It was the supreme moment in his life.那是他一生中最重要的时刻。
  • He handed up the indictment to the supreme court.他把起诉书送交最高法院。
52 superintendent vsTwV     
n.监督人,主管,总监;(英国)警务长
参考例句:
  • He was soon promoted to the post of superintendent of Foreign Trade.他很快就被擢升为对外贸易总监。
  • He decided to call the superintendent of the building.他决定给楼房管理员打电话。
53 haughtily haughtily     
adv. 傲慢地, 高傲地
参考例句:
  • She carries herself haughtily. 她举止傲慢。
  • Haughtily, he stalked out onto the second floor where I was standing. 他傲然跨出电梯,走到二楼,我刚好站在那儿。
54 erect 4iLzm     
n./v.树立,建立,使竖立;adj.直立的,垂直的
参考例句:
  • She held her head erect and her back straight.她昂着头,把背挺得笔直。
  • Soldiers are trained to stand erect.士兵们训练站得笔直。
55 swollen DrcwL     
adj.肿大的,水涨的;v.使变大,肿胀
参考例句:
  • Her legs had got swollen from standing up all day.因为整天站着,她的双腿已经肿了。
  • A mosquito had bitten her and her arm had swollen up.蚊子叮了她,她的手臂肿起来了。


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