We now have to consider how to acquire the faculty1 of seeing the light that in our fellowmen is often so deeply hidden. We can love only that which is lovable. If we could see holiness, beauty concealed2 within our fellow-beings, we should be drawn3 towards them by the most powerful attraction, willingly living in their life, and permitting them to live in ours. We should then love all men, for we should see in all what is unspeakably lovable. But the empirical man stands between us and the spiritual man, and the empirical woman between us and the spiritual woman; and very often the former are most repulsive4, even when their ugly traits do not affect us personally, even when as spectators merely we observe how they behave.
Much more is it well-nigh insuperably difficult to worship, in the sense of holding worthy6, those whose characteristic traits directly offend us, or are perpetual thorns in our side. We must somehow learn to regard the empirical traits, odious7, harmful or merely commonplace and vulgar as they may be, as the mask, the screen interposed between our eyes and the real self of others. We must acquire the faculty of second sight, of seeing the lovable self as the true self. And how without 224self deception8 we can possibly succeed in doing so is the question.
In the first place, it is my own craving9 for resurrection out of that death in life to which I seem doomed10 that must impel11 me to penetrate12 to the essential life in others. My own spiritual nature is in fetters13, and to burst the fetters, to escape from the prison, there is but one way. The unique personality, which is the real life in me, I cannot gain, nor even approximate to, unless I search and go on searching for the spiritual numen in others.67 The force which incites14 me to penetrate beyond the empirical traits of others, to surmount15 the walls which surround the shrine16 in them, is the consciousness that unless I do so I am myself spiritually lost, I remain myself spiritually dead. For it is only face to face with the god enthroned in the innermost shrine of the other that the god hidden in me will consent to appear. 225
The expression “death in life” means living, even living passionately17 and in a way efficiently18, with a sense, nevertheless, underneath19 of the hollowness, the futility20 of the objects of pursuit. The death in life is the state of discontent that slowly gathers and augments21 in a man’s mind as he pursues his customary ends, as he reviews his intellectual achievement, the books he has written, the pictures he has painted, the meager22 outcome of his schemes of social reform, the uncertain result of his efforts at moral self-development. It is the ensuing distaste for what he has actually accomplished23, the disallowance24 of it as in any way ultimately satisfying. And yet this death in life is itself the well-spring of resurrection, out of which is engendered25 an irrepressible yearning26 of the mind to attach itself to something greater than all ephemeral interests, to something that has eternal worth, and is of such a kind as to communicate of its eternal nature to him who touches it. The god in the other, the eternal personality in the inner sanctuary27 of the other, is that object which must be sought and touched. The cry of my own soul for salvation28 is the impulse that leads me on to search for that object. Without the previous discontent, I shall not seek; without the appraisement29 of the temporal ends and interests of man as in the last analysis unsatisfying, I shall not226 set out on my quest. Enmeshed in the jungle of the empirical world, I shall find no exit. I shall remain the victim of the illusion that the peace I need can be found in the realm of temporal desire. I shall commit what the theologians called Original Sin, that is, the preferring of “the works of the Creator to the Creator himself.”
But there is a second force that must act in conjunction with this keen desire for personal liberation or highest personal self-affirmation. It is the sense of the dependence30 of others upon what I can do for them. Notoriously it is the dependence of the child that evokes31 in the parent the noblest qualities of which he is capable, the self-denial, the incessant32 willingness to labor33 for the good of the offspring. It is the dependence of the student on the teacher, of the disciple34 on the master that elicits35 the latter’s best thought. It is the dependence of the multitude on the religious teacher that puts him on his mettle36. But if the dependence of others upon oneself is to produce its appropriate results, that dependence will have to be interpreted in a spiritual sense. We shall have to think of others as dependent on us not only for the necessary empirical services we are bound to render them, but those empirical services themselves will have to be regarded as instruments by means of which we may render them the highest spiritual service.
The question we must answer, and it is one that has never been adequately met, is: What is it in the other that we are to serve, what is the true object of our service? Man is worth while on his own account.227 Now no one can pretend that the welfare of the animal part of man is an object worth while on its own account. To satisfy the hunger or the thirst of another, or to promote his health is to serve his body. But the body is the servant of a master. And I am not bound to serve a servant. If I am to serve the servant at all it must be for the sake of the master. Who then is the master?
The same argument applies also to the intellect. Human science is after all but a narrow littoral38 along the illimitable continent of nescience. No one who compares the intellectual achievements of mankind with the problems that remain unsolved will pretend that the accomplishments39 of the intellect are worth while on their own account. The mental no less than the physical part of us has a master. There is an object higher than the acquisition of knowledge to be attained40 in the course of the mind’s endeavors to acquire knowledge, namely the growth of the scientist towards unique personality, as will be shown in the chapter on the Vocations42 in the last Book. Analogous43 considerations apply to art and its achievements.
And if someone should say that neither the satisfaction of the body alone, nor of the intellect, nor of the ?sthetic sense, nor of the affections, but of all of them taken together, is to be the object of our service, the answer is that this would be merely serving a whole household of servants, and still not serving the master. This quite aside from the fact that the ideal of happiness as consisting in the harmonious44 gratification of the various elements enumerated45 is chimerical46. Since some of the most indispensable elements of happiness, such as freedom228 from disease and from bereavement47, are beyond our control. While even the higher faculties48 are far from harmoniously49 co?perating, the one-sidedness of human nature being such that a marked development in one direction is actually incompatible50 with complete development in other directions.
Unless, then, there be some master end in everyone’s life, one paramount51 to all others, to which all others are subordinate (the subordination and the renunciation involved being themselves means of spiritualizing one’s nature) there is no point to the notion of service. That master end I have defined as the attainment52 of the conviction of one’s infinite interrelatedness, the consciousness of oneself as a member of the spiritual universe, a ?παξ λεγ?μενον68 in the eternal life, a source of energy induplicable in its kind, which radiates out and touches at the center each one of the infinite multitude of spiritual associates, and receives from them the effect of their aboriginally diverse modes of energizing53 in return.
I have mentioned two motives54 that impel me to search for the numen in others. The one, the craving for my own liberation from the death in life, my own desperate outreaching toward salvation; the other, the sense of the dependence of others upon me. Yes, but this dependence of theirs I must now interpret as spiritual dependence. I must look for them also beyond the death in life to life itself. I must have the courage and the truthfulness55 to look upon neighbor, friend, wife, husband, son, daughter sub specie ?ternitatis, that is, as primarily spiritual beings, and estimate any physical, intellectual229 or emotional help I can give them by the consideration whether it does or does not advance them toward the master end of their being.
Courage of this sort is rare, because precisely56 the physical, mental and emotional wants of those who depend on us are the most obvious and clamorous57. I do not of course mean that we should not attend effectually to their immediate58 wants. How could we avoid doing so? How could we neglect the health, the education, etc., of our children? What I say is that we should acquire the habit of looking upon the immediate ends as instrumental, and keep in view the supreme59 end which they in turn are to serve, and that we should beware of what I have called the fallacy of provisionalism—that of supposing that we are at liberty to provide for the lower immediate necessities first, leaving the higher and the highest needs to be attended to later on.
The manner in which parents commonly plan for the future of their sons and daughters is perhaps the fittest illustration of the idea I am here seeking to exclude. During the period of infancy60 they pilot the child through the dangers that beset61 its physical existence. Later on, what is called education, the preliminary mental training required to fit the young for the business of life, is felt to be imperative62. Then comes the selection of a vocation41 with a view of assuring the material basis of subsistence. Still later, the advancement63 of the sons or daughters in their chosen vocations, or their social success occupies perhaps the parent’s mind. Thoughts of a happy marriage flatter the parent’s im230agination. If the moral side receives attention, the utmost that as a rule is demanded is that the young person shall not fall below the average moral standard that happens to prevail in the community. And it is in such ways as these that we are apt to respond to the claims of those spiritual beings for whose essential future welfare we are to so large an extent responsible.
To widen this all too narrow conception of our responsibilities, the following reflections may be found useful. A father in the last decade of his life realizes acutely the brevity of his own past existence. The curve of his life is now rapidly descending65. Supposing him to be nearing seventy, his adult sons and daughters may by this time have reached the age of thirty or forty. Looking back on the thirty or more years that separate him from them, and remembering how like a dream the intervening years have glided66 by, it may come home to him with sudden force how soon these, his sons and daughters too, though now in their prime, will reach the point at which he has arrived. The error of parents is to think of their grown sons and daughters only as moving on the upward curve of life. They stop short in imagination there. They look forward to marriage, vocational success and the like, as finalities for those who are still young. We ought to remember that the upward curve in the lives of our children will presently descend64 just as ours has descended67, that the few decades which separate them from old age will pass as quickly for them as they have passed for us,—almost in the twinkling of an eye,—and we ought to ask on their behalf as we must on ours,—What is to be the result of it all? What does231 it all profit? And it is this thought that will turn our attention for them as for ourselves to the spiritual end which should be dominant68 at all times,—in the morning, at noon, and in the evening twilight69 of a human existence.
All that has been said has to do with the arousing in us of the desire to see in others the god, the numen, the master end. The wish to escape from our own death in life, the sense of the dependence of others on us as interpreted,—these two are the means of stirring us up to go forth70 upon the quest, and the seeking is already more than half the journey. Seek, and ye shall find. But what exactly is it that we are to seek? What are we to see in the other?—The spiritual nature. But what is the spiritual nature? I have frequently urged that the lack of a definite description of the spiritual nature is the chief defect in ethics71 up to the present time. This defect I endeavor to supply. The spiritual nature is the unique nature conceived as interrelated with an infinity72 of natures unique like itself. The spiritual nature in another is the fair quality distinctive73 of the other raised toward the Nth degree. We are to paint ideal portraits of our spiritual associates. We are to see them in the light of what is better in them as it would be if it were transfigured into the best. We are to go on as long as we live painting these ideal portraits of them. We are to retouch their portraits constantly. We are not indeed to obtrude74 or impose upon others these sketches75, these mental creations of ours, but to propose them diffidently, reverently76, to hold them up as glasses in which our associates may possibly see themselves mir232rored. It is for them to accept in whole or in part our rendering77 of their inner selves or to reject it. But we are not to desist from our labor in creating the ideal portraits, for in this consists the spiritual artistry of human intercourse78.
Our friends we are to see in the light of these glorified79 sketches,—our friends and our enemies too. For only thus can we win them, and be essentially80 their benefactors81. There is no power so irresistible82, it has been said, as love. I do not quite accept the word Love. It signifies the feeling that goes with the ideal appreciation83 of others; and mere5 feeling supplies no directive rule of conduct. But it is true that the power of ideally appreciating others, of seeing them in the light of their possible best, and the feeling of love consequent on this vision, is the mightiest84 lever for transforming evil into good, and for sweetening the embittered85 lives of men. No greater boon86 can anyone receive from another than to be helped to think well of himself. Flattery is the base counterfeit87 of appreciation. Spiritual appreciation, appreciation of the inner self despite the mask, is the greatest of gifts, to manifest it is the greatest of arts. In its supreme form it is the art of going down to the lowest of human beings—the man in the ditch, the woman on the street—and making them think well of themselves because of possibilities in their nature they themselves hardly surmise88. It is also the art of making the most developed and advanced human beings realize in themselves something still higher and better than they have ever reached. It is this art by which the supreme human benefactors have worked their spiritual miracles, and it is233 an art which to the extent of our ability we must each acquire and practice, if human society is to be redeemed89.
There are specially90 two points to be remembered: the one, that of seeing the unattained excellence91 in those who are already in the way of excellence; the other, where there is or seems to be a complete absence of fine qualities or of the promise of development, as in the case of backward children, that we should still not abate92 one jot93 of hope or effort, seeking to win even the smallest improvement, in the conviction that the best possible under the circumstances is incalculably worth while. For, compared with the infinite ideal even the achievements of the most advanced and most developed fall infinitely94 short, and what are they more than the best possible under the circumstances. The best possible under the circumstances represents for us the absolute best.
Now a word in regard to those who resist the better influence which we may seek to exercise over them, for instance, the so-called black sheep in families. Our chief concern should here be to prevent the resistance from infecting ourselves and provoking unethical reactions. Ethics is a system of relations. The ethical95 point of view consists in seeing the relation between the offending person and ourselves as it ought to be, in seeing with perfect objectivity the kind of conduct ideally required by the relation on both sides, seeing it and thereby96 assisting the other to see it. But we shall never succeed in doing this until we purge97 from our thoughts and speech every trace of private irritation98. If we can point out to the one who has gone wrong how he has hurt another, and has spiritually hurt himself; if while we do234 this we see the fineness that is possible to him and make him realize that we see it, we shall not utterly99 fail. I am aware that other methods should accompany the spiritual appeal. In some cases, a temporary separation is indicated, in other cases, a prolonged change of environment, or the gradual formation of new habits of industry and application, the awakening100 of interest in some pursuit that leads the mind away from egocentric pre-occupation. Psychology101 and experience crystallized, into commonsense102 have valuable counsels to give. But, along with the technical aids, the spiritual influence should never be lost sight of or relegated103 to the second place.
And finally two ideas should be mentioned which are pertinent104 to broken relations, as for instance to the unhappy marriage relation and to interrupted friendships: One that the break is never complete. There remain certain threads unsundered, which should be most sedulously105 preserved intact. They may serve as points of attachment106 to weave the tie anew. Again, and this is still more important, thought that the break would never have occurred if the relation had been as finely conceived as it ought to have been on my side as well as on the others. Take friendship as an example. A friendship of many years’ standing107 is suddenly wrecked108. Why? What were the terms on which the friendship had been based? What had friendship meant to me?—A certain personal attraction, mutual109 aid and comfort, taking counsel together, sympathy in joy and sorrow. These are valuable elements of friendship, but they do not even touch the essential point. They235 do not describe the principal function which a friend has to fulfil. The friend ideally is one who stands alongside another as the spectator of his spiritual development, as one who appraises110 his friend’s advance toward the master end of life disinterestedly111, and yet with deepest personal concern. He is the mirror in which his friend may see the stages of his spiritual progress reflected. Now I have lost my friend. Why have I lost him? Because he was never a true friend to me, and, I must add, because I was never a real friend to him. I have not really lost him, because I never really possessed112 him. And on making this discovery I shall have a new light shed on what friendship might mean. I may never be so fortunate as to find the actual friend, but I shall know what he ought to be, and what it is in me to be to him. And when I say, “what it is in me to be to him,” I think of resources of my inner being which have never been called out; I think of the worth that belongs to me as a spiritual being capable of giving forth and receiving highest spiritual influence, and I am thereby immeasurably aggrandized113 in my own esteem114, the self in me is lifted nearer as it were to its infinite counterpart in the eternal life. I walk henceforth on a higher level, I dwell amid serener115 presences. And this aggrandizement116 of the self, not on the ground of what I am but what I may be, and of others too, not on the ground of what they are, but what they may be, is the compensation derived117 from the bitter experience of broken relations. And what has been said of friendship by way of example is true of frustration118 in marriage as well, and of frustrations119 of every kind.
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1
faculty
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| n.才能；学院，系；(学院或系的)全体教学人员 | |
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concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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repulsive
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| adj.排斥的，使人反感的 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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odious
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| adj.可憎的，讨厌的 | |
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deception
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| n.欺骗，欺诈；骗局，诡计 | |
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craving
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| n.渴望,热望 | |
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doomed
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| 命定的 | |
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impel
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| v.推动；激励，迫使 | |
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penetrate
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| v.透(渗)入；刺入，刺穿；洞察，了解 | |
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fetters
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| n.脚镣( fetter的名词复数 )；束缚v.给…上脚镣，束缚( fetter的第三人称单数 ) | |
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incites
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| 刺激，激励，煽动( incite的第三人称单数 ) | |
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surmount
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| vt.克服；置于…顶上 | |
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shrine
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| n.圣地，神龛，庙；v.将...置于神龛内，把...奉为神圣 | |
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passionately
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| ad.热烈地，激烈地 | |
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efficiently
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| adv.高效率地，有能力地 | |
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underneath
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| adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面 | |
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futility
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| n.无用 | |
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augments
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| 增加，提高，扩大( augment的名词复数 ) | |
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meager
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| adj.缺乏的，不足的，瘦的 | |
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accomplished
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| adj.有才艺的；有造诣的；达到了的 | |
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disallowance
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| n.不许可，驳回，拒绝 | |
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engendered
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| v.产生（某形势或状况），造成，引起( engender的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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yearning
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| a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的 | |
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sanctuary
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| n.圣所，圣堂，寺庙；禁猎区，保护区 | |
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salvation
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| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
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appraisement
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| n.评价，估价；估值 | |
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dependence
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| n.依靠，依赖；信任，信赖；隶属 | |
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evokes
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| 产生，引起，唤起( evoke的第三人称单数 ) | |
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incessant
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| adj.不停的，连续的 | |
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labor
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| n.劳动，努力，工作，劳工；分娩；vi.劳动，努力，苦干；vt.详细分析；麻烦 | |
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disciple
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| n.信徒，门徒，追随者 | |
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elicits
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| 引出，探出( elicit的第三人称单数 ) | |
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mettle
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| n.勇气，精神 | |
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scrutiny
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| n.详细检查，仔细观察 | |
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littoral
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| adj.海岸的；湖岸的；n.沿（海）岸地区 | |
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accomplishments
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| n.造诣；完成( accomplishment的名词复数 )；技能；成绩；成就 | |
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attained
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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vocation
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| n.职业，行业 | |
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vocations
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| n.（认为特别适合自己的）职业( vocation的名词复数 )；使命；神召；（认为某种工作或生活方式特别适合自己的）信心 | |
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analogous
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| adj.相似的；类似的 | |
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harmonious
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| adj.和睦的，调和的，和谐的，协调的 | |
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enumerated
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| v.列举，枚举，数( enumerate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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chimerical
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| adj.荒诞不经的，梦幻的 | |
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bereavement
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| n.亲人丧亡，丧失亲人，丧亲之痛 | |
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faculties
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| n.能力( faculty的名词复数 )；全体教职员；技巧；院 | |
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harmoniously
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| 和谐地，调和地 | |
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incompatible
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| adj.不相容的，不协调的，不相配的 | |
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51
paramount
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| a.最重要的，最高权力的 | |
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52
attainment
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| n.达到，到达；［常pl.］成就，造诣 | |
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53
energizing
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| v.给予…精力，能量( energize的现在分词 )；使通电 | |
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54
motives
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| n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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truthfulness
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| n. 符合实际 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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57
clamorous
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| adj.吵闹的，喧哗的 | |
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immediate
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| adj.立即的；直接的，最接近的；紧靠的 | |
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supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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infancy
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| n.婴儿期；幼年期；初期 | |
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beset
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| v.镶嵌；困扰，包围 | |
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imperative
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| n.命令，需要；规则；祈使语气；adj.强制的；紧急的 | |
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advancement
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| n.前进，促进，提升 | |
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64
descend
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| vt./vi.传下来，下来，下降 | |
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descending
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| n. 下行 adj. 下降的 | |
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glided
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| v.滑动( glide的过去式和过去分词 )；掠过；（鸟或飞机 ） 滑翔 | |
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descended
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| a.为...后裔的，出身于...的 | |
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dominant
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| adj.支配的，统治的；占优势的；显性的；n.主因，要素，主要的人(或物)；显性基因 | |
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69
twilight
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| n.暮光，黄昏；暮年，晚期，衰落时期 | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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ethics
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| n.伦理学；伦理观，道德标准 | |
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infinity
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| n.无限，无穷，大量 | |
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distinctive
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| adj.特别的，有特色的，与众不同的 | |
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obtrude
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| v.闯入；侵入；打扰 | |
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sketches
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| n.草图( sketch的名词复数 )；素描；速写；梗概 | |
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reverently
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| adv.虔诚地 | |
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rendering
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| n.表现，描写 | |
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intercourse
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| n.性交；交流，交往，交际 | |
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glorified
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| 美其名的，变荣耀的 | |
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essentially
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| adv.本质上，实质上，基本上 | |
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benefactors
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| n.捐助者，施主( benefactor的名词复数 )；恩人 | |
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irresistible
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| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
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appreciation
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| n.评价；欣赏；感谢；领会，理解；价格上涨 | |
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mightiest
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| adj.趾高气扬( mighty的最高级 )；巨大的；强有力的；浩瀚的 | |
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embittered
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| v.使怨恨，激怒( embitter的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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boon
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| n.恩赐，恩物，恩惠 | |
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counterfeit
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| vt.伪造，仿造；adj.伪造的，假冒的 | |
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surmise
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| v./n.猜想，推测 | |
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redeemed
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| adj. 可赎回的，可救赎的 动词redeem的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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specially
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| adv.特定地；特殊地；明确地 | |
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excellence
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| n.优秀，杰出，(pl.)优点，美德 | |
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abate
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| vi.(风势，疼痛等)减弱，减轻，减退 | |
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jot
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| n.少量；vi.草草记下；vt.匆匆写下 | |
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infinitely
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| adv.无限地，无穷地 | |
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ethical
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| adj.伦理的，道德的，合乎道德的 | |
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thereby
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| adv.因此，从而 | |
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purge
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| n.整肃，清除，泻药，净化；vt.净化，清除，摆脱；vi.清除，通便，腹泻，变得清洁 | |
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irritation
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| n.激怒，恼怒，生气 | |
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utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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awakening
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| n.觉醒，醒悟 adj.觉醒中的；唤醒的 | |
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psychology
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| n.心理，心理学，心理状态 | |
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102
commonsense
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| adj.有常识的；明白事理的；注重实际的 | |
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103
relegated
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| v.使降级( relegate的过去式和过去分词 )；使降职；转移；把…归类 | |
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pertinent
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| adj.恰当的；贴切的；中肯的；有关的；相干的 | |
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sedulously
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| ad.孜孜不倦地 | |
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attachment
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| n.附属物，附件；依恋；依附 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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wrecked
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| adj.失事的，遇难的 | |
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109
mutual
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| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
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appraises
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| v.估价( appraise的第三人称单数 )；估计；估量；评价 | |
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disinterestedly
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112
possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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113
aggrandized
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| v.扩大某人的权力( aggrandize的过去式和过去分词 )；提高某人的地位；夸大；吹捧 | |
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114
esteem
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| n.尊敬，尊重；vt.尊重，敬重；把…看作 | |
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115
serener
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| serene（沉静的，宁静的，安宁的）的比较级形式 | |
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116
aggrandizement
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| n.增大，强化，扩大 | |
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117
derived
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| vi.起源；由来；衍生；导出v.得到( derive的过去式和过去分词 )；（从…中）得到获得；源于；（从…中）提取 | |
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118
frustration
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| n.挫折，失败，失效，落空 | |
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119
frustrations
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| 挫折( frustration的名词复数 )； 失败； 挫败； 失意 | |
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