THE GRANDCHILD

 To

X

{312} 

Scene I

{313} In Guy Fallon’s Garden

 

Katya. What you have never understood, dear, is that mamma is terribly indelicate. Proper people nearly always are.

Mariana. Yes, but.... How can she?

Katya. I don’t know. But she’s doing it now, this very minute. Imagine Guy’s blushes¹.

Mariana. Poor Guy! But, really, if it’s any one’s duty to ask him, surely it’s yours?

Katya. But I have asked him! He always says no. He detests² children—or, at least, he says he does. It’s a disease with mamma. “How I should like to hold a grandchild on my knee ... the patter of its little feet ... its first childish⁴ attempts to talk ... its soft smooth cheeks.” That’s how she goes on. Really, she embarrasses even me.

Mariana. Well, I s’pose it’s only natural. But what does your papa say?

Katya. Oh, it hasn’t got as far as that; I hope it never will. You see, mamma will only amuse Guy; papa would make him angry. After all, dear, it’s very soon. And you must remember that even mamma only had one.

Mariana. ’M yes. She needn’t talk, need she?

Katya. But she does. She has asked me all sorts of questions about Guy.

Mariana. Yes? What sort of questions?

Katya. Mariana! As if I’d tell you!

Mariana. Do—please!

Katya. Can’t you guess?{314}

Mariana. I’ve tried—hard. But, you see, I know so little about these things. In fact, I know nothing at all.

Katya. These things?

Mariana. Well, you know what I mean.

Katya. Oh! you might mean anything.

Mariana. I do.

Katya. If you were married, now, I might.

Mariana. I should love to be there, listening.

Katya. It’s a grandson she wants. She’ll order it from Guy. And he will look so awfully⁵ solemn and feel so frightfully tickled⁶.

Mariana. Oh, I do wish I was married. It must be so tremendously—well, exciting. So unexpected, you know—the things that happen, I mean.

Katya. Well, it is rather wonderful at first. I have a friend in Brussels—Elise Deschamps. The other day she wrote me such a funny letter. She wanted to know whether she ought to behave just naturally or pretend to be shy.

Mariana. And what did you say?

Katya. What could I say?

Mariana. Really, Katya, you’re frightfully exasperating⁷. You always seem to be on the point of telling me things, but you never do.

Katya. Well, there’s nothing to tell—nothing, that is, that you don’t know already.

Mariana. Oh, how dreadfully disappointing! Isn’t there really more in it than that?

Katya. Than what?

Mariana. Than what I know already.

Katya. But what do you know?

{315}

* * *

Scene II

In Guy Fallon’s Library

 

Mrs. Kontorompa. I was just saying the same thing as I came upstairs. “What an exquisite⁸ day!” That’s what I was saying.

Guy. But a trifle⁹ too hot.

Mrs. K. Ye—es. [A long pause.] Oh yes, quite.

Guy. Seen Katya?

Mrs. K. I waved my hand to her in the garden as I came up the drive.... How is Katya, Guy?

Guy. Tophole.

Mrs. K. [Significantly.] Have you anything to tell me about—well, about Katya?

Guy. Let me see, now.... N-no; I think not. She bought three new hats yesterday, but I haven’t seen them yet.

Mrs. K. What I meant was.... Well, it’s no use beating about the bush—how is she?

Guy. But I’ve already told you, mamma. She has the appetite of a horse.

Mrs. K. Nothing at all? well—quite?... no sign that?... you know!

Guy. I wish I did. What is it you want me to tell you?

Mrs. K. Just the truth—the honest, simple truth.

Guy. [Wilfully misunderstanding her.] Oh, your {316}new toque! How stupid I am! I think it’s simply splendid. But you always do look nice in pink.

Mrs. K. [Beaming.] How sweet of you, Guy! But that wasn’t it.... Have you ever considered, Guy, that I should like to be a grandmother?

Guy. No. Would you really? Really and truly?

Mrs. K. Yes, Guy. The patter of little feet, the ... the soft, smooth cheeks....

Guy. But I detest³ children.

Mrs. K. Ah! You’ll never make me believe that. No good man hates children.

Guy. No, I s’pose not. But then, mamma, I’m not good. I remember that when I was a boy....

Mrs. K. But poor Katya! Consider her. Consider me.

Guy. In what way?

Mrs. K. You—you know perfectly¹⁰ well what I mean. If I could only be the grandmother of one child—well, that would be something, wouldn’t it?

Guy. It would be a great deal.

Mrs. K. For my part, I had four brothers and three sisters. My grandmother had seventy-three grandchildren.

Guy. Yes, people were very thorough¹¹ half a century ago. Quite like the Old Testament¹².

Mrs. K. But you will promise, won’t you?

Guy. {317}Do you know, mamma, you have the manner of being most direct and open, but as a matter of fact you are speaking in riddles¹³. Now, tell me—what is it you want me to promise you?

Mrs. K. I don’t quite know.

Guy. I thought you didn’t.

Mrs. K. You see, Katya is so reticent¹⁴ in these matters. But you’ll do your best, I’m sure. To win over Katya, I mean. That is, if it is Katya.

Guy. Who is to blame, you mean?

Mrs. K. Oh, I shouldn’t say “blame.” Although if it goes on much longer, I may. But you’ll think it over, eh? That is the most I can expect at our first interview on this subject.

Guy. There are to be others?

Mrs. K. If necessary.

Guy. But, mamma, you don’t know how much at sea I feel. As a matter of fact, I’m not absolutely certain that we’re both talking about the same thing. Will you tell me what you have been talking about?

Mrs. K. N-no. You tell me first.

Guy. I daren’t.

Mrs. K. That’s it! We are talking about the same thing. I felt sure we were.

Guy. Well, so long as you’re satisfied, mamma....

Mrs. K. I shall look forward to it with the greatest pleasure. You see, you’ve got such a big house. I should have this room, if I were you. Bars across the windows, and so on.

Guy. But the stairs!

Mrs. K. A little wicket ga{318}te on the landing. They begin to prowl about quite early. I remember Katya eighteen years ago—always on her hands and knees!

Guy. She’s in the garden with Mariana.

Mrs. K. Yes, I saw her.... Well, then, that’s settled.

Guy. One can only do what one can.

Mrs. K. Yes, win her over, Guy: win her over.

* * *

Scene III

In Guy Fallon’s Garden

 

Mrs. Kontorompa. What an exquisite day! How do you do?

Mariana. How do you do? Yes, isn’t it?

Guy. We’ve been talking, Katya.

Katya. Yes?... I think the fuchsias are better than ever this year, don’t you, mamma?

Mrs. K. Yes, darling. Oh, Katya, I am so pleased.

Katya. How nice, mamma! I like you to be happy. But what has happened?

Mrs. K. Oh—er—nothing. Nothing that I know of. But Guy has promised to....

Mariana. I’m afraid I must be really going now, Katya, dear.

Mrs. K. Oh, don’t run away just because I’ve come.

Mariana. Oh, Mrs. Kontorompa, it wasn’t that. But, you see..{319}..

Katya. Mariana feels embarrassed.

Mariana. Oh—no, dear: why should I?

Guy. You felt that mamma was going to say something.

Mrs. K. Yes—that’s quite right. You’ve reminded me. Katya, I was going to say that Guy has promised to....

Guy. To do my best to....

Mrs. K. Win you over.

Katya. Me? Win me over? To what?

Guy. Bars on the window—a wicket-gate on the landing.

Katya. But I am won over. I always have been.

Mrs. K. Then it is your fault, Guy.

Guy. If I’d only known! You see, you never told me.

Mariana. How mysterious all this sounds.

Mrs. K. Well, Mariana, this is how it stands. You see, Guy and Katya have been married three years and....

Mariana. Oh yes: quite. I understand. Good-bye, Mrs. Kontorompa. Good-bye, Katya. Goo....

Guy. Really, mamma.

Katya. Really, mamma.

Mrs. K. Oh, dear, dear! What have I said?

Katya. Ah, here’s tea coming!

Mrs. K. Oh, I can’t stop. I must hurry home and tell papa the good news. So very satisfactory! These modern times—the things people do. Don’t they, dear?

Mariana. And don’t do, too.{320}

Mrs. K. Yes. Well, Guy, I keep you to your word. I shall expect to hear some news shortly. Good-bye, dear Katya. So satisfactory. Take care of yourself, dear.

Guy. Why, what has happened, Katya?

Katya. Nothing. Mother merely anticipates.

 

1 blushes   

n.脸红的人( blush的名词复数 )v.脸红( blush的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• She often blushes when speaking to strangers. 她跟生人说话爱红脸。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Blushes showed her embarrassment. 她双颊发红，一副窘态。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

2 detests   

v.憎恶，嫌恶，痛恨( detest的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• My brother detests having to get up early. 我兄弟极讨厌早起，又不得不早起。 来自辞典例句
• The LORD detests differing weights, and dishonest scales do not please him. 两样的法码，为耶和华所憎恶。诡诈的天平，也为不善。 来自互联网

3 detest   

vt.痛恨，憎恶

参考例句：

• I detest people who tell lies.我恨说谎的人。
• The workers detest his overbearing manner.工人们很讨厌他那盛气凌人的态度。

4 childish   

adj.孩子的，孩子气的，幼稚的

参考例句：

• The little girl spoke in a high childish voice.这个小女孩用尖尖的童声讲话。
• We eventually ran out of patience with his childish behaviour.我们终于对他幼稚的行为忍无可忍。

5 awfully   

adv.可怕地，非常地，极端地

参考例句：

• Agriculture was awfully neglected in the past.过去农业遭到严重忽视。
• I've been feeling awfully bad about it.对这我一直感到很难受。

6 tickled   

（使）发痒( tickle的过去式和过去分词 )； （使）愉快，逗乐

参考例句：

• We were tickled pink to see our friends on television. 在电视中看到我们的一些朋友，我们高兴极了。
• I tickled the baby's feet and made her laugh. 我胳肢孩子的脚，使她发笑。

7 exasperating   

adj. 激怒的 动词exasperate的现在分词形式

参考例句：

• Our team's failure is very exasperating. 我们队失败了，真是气死人。
• It is really exasperating that he has not turned up when the train is about to leave. 火车快开了， 他还不来，实在急人。

8 exquisite   

adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的

参考例句：

• I was admiring the exquisite workmanship in the mosaic.我当时正在欣赏镶嵌画的精致做工。
• I still remember the exquisite pleasure I experienced in Bali.我依然记得在巴厘岛所经历的那种剧烈的快感。

9 trifle   

n.无价值的东西、问题、行动；v.轻视，小看

参考例句：

• It's senseless to get angry over such a trifle.不值得为这点小事惹气。
• This trifle developed itself into a serious problem.这件小事已发展成一个很严重的问题。

10 perfectly   

adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
• Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。

11 thorough   

adj. 彻底的，完全的，精心的

参考例句：

• He made a very thorough analysis on the situation.他对形势的分析很透彻。
• The committee reported its findings after a thorough investigation.委员会在彻底调查以后报告了调查结果。

12 testament   

n.遗嘱；证明

参考例句：

• This is his last will and testament.这是他的遗愿和遗嘱。
• It is a testament to the power of political mythology.这说明，编造政治神话可以产生多大的威力。

13 riddles   

n.谜（语）( riddle的名词复数 )；猜不透的难题，难解之谜

参考例句：

• Few riddles collected from oral tradition, however, have all six parts. 但是据收集的情况看，口头流传的谜语很少具有这完整的六部分。 来自英汉非文学 - 民俗
• But first, you'd better see if you can answer riddles. 但是你首先最好想想你会不会猜谜语。 来自辞典例句

14 reticent   

adj.沉默寡言的；言不如意的

参考例句：

• He was reticent about his opinion.他有保留意见。
• He was extremely reticent about his personal life.他对自己的个人生活讳莫如深。