Silently I had entered the room in great awe1. The angelic appearance of Master Mahasaya fairly dazzled me. With silky white beard and large lustrous2 eyes, he seemed an incarnation of purity. His upraised chin and folded hands apprized me that my first visit had disturbed him in the midst of his devotions.
His simple words of greeting produced the most violent effect my nature had so far experienced. The bitter separation of my mother's death I had thought the measure of all anguish3. Now an agony at separation from my Divine Mother was an indescribable torture of the spirit. I fell moaning to the floor.
"Little sir, quiet yourself!" The saint was sympathetically distressed4.
Abandoned in some oceanic desolation, I clutched his feet as the sole raft of my rescue.
"Holy sir, thy intercession! Ask Divine Mother if I find any favor in Her sight!"
Beyond reach of doubt, I was convinced that Master Mahasaya was in intimate converse7 with the Universal Mother. It was deep humiliation8 to realize that my eyes were blind to Her who even at this moment was perceptible to the faultless gaze of the saint. Shamelessly gripping his feet, deaf to his gentle remonstrances9, I besought10 him again and again for his intervening grace.
"I will make your plea to the Beloved." The master's capitulation came with a slow, compassionate11 smile.
What power in those few words, that my being should know release from its stormy exile?
"Sir, remember your pledge! I shall return soon for Her message!" Joyful13 anticipation14 rang in my voice that only a moment ago had been sobbing15 in sorrow.
Descending16 the long stairway, I was overwhelmed by memories. This house at 50 Amherst Street, now the residence of Master Mahasaya, had once been my family home, scene of my mother's death. Here my human heart had broken for the vanished mother; and here today my spirit had been as though crucified by absence of the Divine Mother. Hallowed walls, silent witness of my grievous hurts and final healing!
My steps were eager as I returned to my Gurpar Road home. Seeking the seclusion17 of my small attic18, I remained in meditation19 until ten o'clock. The darkness of the warm Indian night was suddenly lit with a wondrous20 vision.
Haloed in splendor21, the Divine Mother stood before me. Her face, tenderly smiling, was beauty itself.
"Always have I loved thee! Ever shall I love thee!"
The sun on the following morning had hardly risen to an angle of decorum when I paid my second visit to Master Mahasaya. Climbing the staircase in the house of poignant23 memories, I reached his fourth- floor room. The knob of the closed door was wrapped around with a cloth; a hint, I felt, that the saint desired privacy. As I stood irresolutely24 on the landing, the door was opened by the master's welcoming hand. I knelt at his holy feet. In a playful mood, I wore a solemn mask over my face, hiding the divine elation25.
"Sir, I have come-very early, I confess!-for your message. Did the Beloved Mother say anything about me?"
"Mischievous26 little sir!"
Not another remark would he make. Apparently27 my assumed gravity was unimpressive.
"Why so mysterious, so evasive? Do saints never speak plainly?" Perhaps I was a little provoked.
"Must you test me?" His calm eyes were full of understanding. "Could I add a single word this morning to the assurance you received last night at ten o'clock from the Beautiful Mother Herself?"
Master Mahasaya possessed29 control over the flood-gates of my soul: again I plunged30 prostrate31 at his feet. But this time my tears welled from a bliss32, and not a pain, past bearing.
"Think you that your devotion did not touch the Infinite Mercy? The Motherhood of God, that you have worshiped in forms both human and divine, could never fail to answer your forsaken33 cry."
Who was this simple saint, whose least request to the Universal Spirit met with sweet acquiescence34? His role in the world was humble35, as befitted the greatest man of humility36 I ever knew. In this Amherst Street house, Master Mahasaya 9-1 conducted a small high school for boys. No words of chastisement37 passed his lips; no rule and ferule maintained his discipline. Higher mathematics indeed were taught in these modest classrooms, and a chemistry of love absent from the textbooks. He spread his wisdom by spiritual contagion38 rather than impermeable39 precept40. Consumed by an unsophisticated passion for the Divine Mother, the saint no more demanded the outward forms of respect than a child.
"I am not your guru; he shall come a little later," he told me. "Through his guidance, your experiences of the Divine in terms of love and devotion shall be translated into his terms of fathomless41 wisdom."
Every late afternoon, I betook myself to Amherst Street. I sought Master Mahasaya's divine cup, so full that its drops daily overflowed42 on my being. Never before had I bowed in utter reverence43; now I felt it an immeasurable privilege even to tread the same ground which Master Mahasaya sanctified.
"Sir, please wear this champak garland I have fashioned especially for you." I arrived one evening, holding my chain of flowers. But shyly he drew away, repeatedly refusing the honor. Perceiving my hurt, he finally smiled consent.
"Since we are both devotees of the Mother, you may put the garland on this bodily temple, as offering to Her who dwells within." His vast nature lacked space in which any egotistical consideration could gain foothold.
nbrothers
TWO BROTHERS OF THERESE NEUMANN
I stand with them in Konnersreuth, Bavaria.
mmahasaya
MASTER MAHASAYA
"Let us go tomorrow to the Dakshineswar Temple, forever hallowed by my guru." Master Mahasaya was a disciple45 of a Christlike master, Sri Ramakrishna Paramhansa.
The four-mile journey on the following morning was taken by boat on the Ganges. We entered the nine-domed Temple of Kali, where the figures of the Divine Mother and Shiva rest on a burnished46 silver lotus, its thousand petals47 meticulously48 chiseled49. Master Mahasaya beamed in enchantment50. He was engaged in his inexhaustible romance with the Beloved. As he chanted Her name, my enraptured51 heart seemed shattered into a thousand pieces.
We strolled later through the sacred precincts, halting in a tamarisk grove52. The manna characteristically exuded53 by this tree was symbolic54 of the heavenly food Master Mahasaya was bestowing55. His divine invocations continued. I sat rigidly56 motionless on the grass amid the pink feathery tamarisk flowers. Temporarily absent from the body, I soared in a supernal57 visit.
This was the first of many pilgrimages to Dakshineswar with the holy teacher. From him I learned the sweetness of God in the aspect of Mother, or Divine Mercy. The childlike saint found little appeal in the Father aspect, or Divine Justice. Stern, exacting58, mathematical judgment59 was alien to his gentle nature.
"He can serve as an earthly prototype for the very angels of heaven!" I thought fondly, watching him one day at his prayers. Without a breath of censure60 or criticism, he surveyed the world with eyes long familiar with the Primal61 Purity. His body, mind, speech, and actions were effortlessly harmonized with his soul's simplicity62.
"My Master told me so." Shrinking from personal assertion, the saint ended any sage12 counsel with this invariable tribute. So deep was his identity with Sri Ramakrishna that Master Mahasaya no longer considered his thoughts as his own.
Hand in hand, the saint and I walked one evening on the block of his school. My joy was dimmed by the arrival of a conceited63 acquaintance who burdened us with a lengthy64 discourse65.
"I see this man doesn't please you." The saint's whisper to me was unheard by the egotist, spellbound by his own monologue66. "I have spoken to Divine Mother about it; She realizes our sad predicament. As soon as we get to yonder red house, She has promised to remind him of more urgent business."
My eyes were glued to the site of salvation67. Reaching its red gate, the man unaccountably turned and departed, neither finishing his sentence nor saying good-by. The assaulted air was comforted with peace.
Another day found me walking alone near the Howrah railway station. I stood for a moment by a temple, silently criticizing a small group of men with drum and cymbals68 who were violently reciting a chant.
"How undevotionally they use the Lord's divine name in mechanical repetition," I reflected. My gaze was astonished by the rapid approach of Master Mahasaya. "Sir, how come you here?"
The saint, ignoring my question, answered my thought. "Isn't it true, little sir, that the Beloved's name sounds sweet from all lips, ignorant or wise?" He passed his arm around me affectionately; I found myself carried on his magic carpet to the Merciful Presence.
"Would you like to see some bioscopes?" This question one afternoon from Master Mahasaya was mystifying; the term was then used in India to signify motion pictures. I agreed, glad to be in his company in any circumstances. A brisk walk brought us to the garden fronting Calcutta University. My companion indicated a bench near the goldighi or pond.
"Let us sit here for a few minutes. My Master always asked me to meditate69 whenever I saw an expanse of water. Here its placidity70 reminds us of the vast calmness of God. As all things can be reflected in water, so the whole universe is mirrored in the lake of the Cosmic Mind. So my gurudeva often said."
Soon we entered a university hall where a lecture was in progress. It proved abysmally71 dull, though varied72 occasionally by lantern slide illustrations, equally uninteresting.
"So this is the kind of bioscope the master wanted me to see!" My thought was impatient, yet I would not hurt the saint by revealing boredom73 in my face. But he leaned toward me confidentially74.
"I see, little sir, that you don't like this bioscope. I have mentioned it to Divine Mother; She is in full sympathy with us both. She tells me that the electric lights will now go out, and won't be relit until we have a chance to leave the room."
As his whisper ended, the hall was plunged into darkness. The professor's strident voice was stilled in astonishment75, then remarked, "The electrical system of this hall appears to be defective76." By this time, Master Mahasaya and I were safely across the threshold. Glancing back from the corridor, I saw that the scene of our martyrdom had again become illuminated77.
"Little sir, you were disappointed in that bioscope, 9-2 but I think you will like a different one." The saint and I were standing28 on the sidewalk in front of the university building. He gently slapped my chest over the heart.
A transforming silence ensued. Just as the modern "talkies" become inaudible motion pictures when the sound apparatus78 goes out of order, so the Divine Hand, by some strange miracle, stifled79 the earthly bustle80. The pedestrians81 as well as the passing trolley82 cars, automobiles83, bullock carts, and iron-wheeled hackney carriages were all in noiseless transit84. As though possessing an omnipresent eye, I beheld85 the scenes which were behind me, and to each side, as easily as those in front. The whole spectacle of activity in that small section of Calcutta passed before me without a sound. Like a glow of fire dimly seen beneath a thin coat of ashes, a mellow86 luminescence permeated87 the panoramic88 view.
My own body seemed nothing more than one of the many shadows, though it was motionless, while the others flitted mutely to and fro. Several boys, friends of mine, approached and passed on; though they had looked directly at me, it was without recognition.
The unique pantomime brought me an inexpressible ecstasy89. I drank deep from some blissful fount. Suddenly my chest received another soft blow from Master Mahasaya. The pandemonium90 of the world burst upon my unwilling91 ears. I staggered, as though harshly awakened92 from a gossamer93 dream. The transcendental wine removed beyond my reach.
"Little sir, I see you found the second bioscope to your liking94." The saint was smiling; I started to drop in gratitude95 on the ground before him. "You can't do that to me now; you know God is in your temple also! I won't let Divine Mother touch my feet through your hands!"
If anyone observed the unpretentious master and myself as we walked away from the crowded pavement, the onlooker96 surely suspected us of intoxication97. I felt that the falling shades of evening were sympathetically drunk with God. When darkness recovered from its nightly swoon, I faced the new morning bereft98 of my ecstatic mood. But ever enshrined in memory is the seraphic son of Divine Mother-Master Mahasaya!
Trying with poor words to do justice to his benignity99, I wonder if Master Mahasaya, and others among the deep-visioned saints whose paths crossed mine, knew that years later, in a Western land, I would be writing about their lives as divine devotees. Their foreknowledge would not surprise me nor, I hope, my readers, who have come thus far with me.
9-1: These are respectful titles by which he was customarily addressed. His name was Mahendra Nath Gupta; he signed his literary works simply "M."
9-2: The Oxford100 English Dictionary gives, as rare, this definition of bioscope: A view of life; that which gives such a view.
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
awe
|
|
| n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
lustrous
|
|
| adj.有光泽的；光辉的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
anguish
|
|
| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
distressed
|
|
| 痛苦的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
bestowed
|
|
| 赠给，授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
constrained
|
|
| adj.束缚的,节制的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
converse
|
|
| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
humiliation
|
|
| n.羞辱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
remonstrances
|
|
| n.抱怨，抗议( remonstrance的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
besought
|
|
| v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的过去式和过去分词 )；(beseech的过去式与过去分词) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
compassionate
|
|
| adj.有同情心的，表示同情的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
sage
|
|
| n.圣人，哲人；adj.贤明的，明智的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
joyful
|
|
| adj.欢乐的，令人欢欣的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
anticipation
|
|
| n.预期，预料，期望 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
sobbing
|
|
| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
descending
|
|
| n. 下行 adj. 下降的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
seclusion
|
|
| n.隐遁，隔离 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
attic
|
|
| n.顶楼，屋顶室 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
meditation
|
|
| n.熟虑，（尤指宗教的）默想，沉思，（pl.）冥想录 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
wondrous
|
|
| adj.令人惊奇的，奇妙的；adv.惊人地；异乎寻常地；令人惊叹地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
splendor
|
|
| n.光彩；壮丽，华丽；显赫，辉煌 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
celestial
|
|
| adj.天体的；天上的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
poignant
|
|
| adj.令人痛苦的，辛酸的，惨痛的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
irresolutely
|
|
| adv.优柔寡断地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
elation
|
|
| n.兴高采烈，洋洋得意 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
mischievous
|
|
| adj.调皮的，恶作剧的，有害的，伤人的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
apparently
|
|
| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
standing
|
|
| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
possessed
|
|
| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
plunged
|
|
| v.颠簸( plunge的过去式和过去分词 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
prostrate
|
|
| v.拜倒，平卧，衰竭；adj.拜倒的，平卧的，衰竭的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
bliss
|
|
| n.狂喜，福佑，天赐的福 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
Forsaken
|
|
| adj. 被遗忘的, 被抛弃的 动词forsake的过去分词 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
acquiescence
|
|
| n.默许；顺从 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
humble
|
|
| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
humility
|
|
| n.谦逊，谦恭 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
chastisement
|
|
| n.惩罚 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
contagion
|
|
| n.(通过接触的疾病)传染；蔓延 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
impermeable
|
|
| adj.不能透过的，不渗透的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
precept
|
|
| n.戒律；格言 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
fathomless
|
|
| a.深不可测的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
overflowed
|
|
| 溢出的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
reverence
|
|
| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
engrossed
|
|
| adj.全神贯注的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
disciple
|
|
| n.信徒，门徒，追随者 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
burnished
|
|
| adj.抛光的，光亮的v.擦亮（金属等），磨光( burnish的过去式和过去分词 )；被擦亮，磨光 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
petals
|
|
| n.花瓣( petal的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
meticulously
|
|
| adv.过细地，异常细致地；无微不至；精心 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
chiseled
|
|
| adj.凿刻的，轮廓分明的v.凿，雕，镌( chisel的过去式 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
enchantment
|
|
| n.迷惑，妖术，魅力 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
enraptured
|
|
| v.使狂喜( enrapture的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
grove
|
|
| n.林子，小树林，园林 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
exuded
|
|
| v.缓慢流出，渗出，分泌出( exude的过去式和过去分词 )；流露出对（某物）的神态或感情 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
symbolic
|
|
| adj.象征性的，符号的，象征主义的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
bestowing
|
|
| 砖窑中砖堆上层已烧透的砖 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
rigidly
|
|
| adv.刻板地，僵化地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
57
supernal
|
|
| adj.天堂的，天上的；崇高的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
58
exacting
|
|
| adj.苛求的，要求严格的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
59
judgment
|
|
| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
60
censure
|
|
| v./n.责备；非难；责难 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
61
primal
|
|
| adj.原始的；最重要的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
62
simplicity
|
|
| n.简单，简易；朴素；直率，单纯 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
63
conceited
|
|
| adj.自负的，骄傲自满的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
64
lengthy
|
|
| adj.漫长的，冗长的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
65
discourse
|
|
| n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
66
monologue
|
|
| n.长篇大论，（戏剧等中的）独白 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
67
salvation
|
|
| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
68
cymbals
|
|
| pl.铙钹 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
69
meditate
|
|
| v.想，考虑，（尤指宗教上的）沉思，冥想 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
70
placidity
|
|
| n.平静，安静，温和 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
71
abysmally
|
|
| adv.极糟地；可怕地；完全地；极端地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
72
varied
|
|
| adj.多样的，多变化的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
73
boredom
|
|
| n.厌烦，厌倦，乏味，无聊 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
74
confidentially
|
|
| ad.秘密地，悄悄地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
75
astonishment
|
|
| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
76
defective
|
|
| adj.有毛病的，有问题的，有瑕疵的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
77
illuminated
|
|
| adj.被照明的；受启迪的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
78
apparatus
|
|
| n.装置，器械；器具，设备 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
79
stifled
|
|
| （使）窒息， （使）窒闷( stifle的过去式和过去分词 )； 镇压，遏制； 堵 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
80
bustle
|
|
| v.喧扰地忙乱，匆忙，奔忙；n.忙碌；喧闹 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
81
pedestrians
|
|
| n.步行者( pedestrian的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
82
trolley
|
|
| n.手推车，台车；无轨电车；有轨电车 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
83
automobiles
|
|
| n.汽车( automobile的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
84
transit
|
|
| n.经过，运输；vt.穿越，旋转；vi.越过 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
85
beheld
|
|
| v.看，注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 )；瞧；看呀；（叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现）哎哟 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
86
mellow
|
|
| adj.柔和的；熟透的；v.变柔和；(使)成熟 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
87
permeated
|
|
| 弥漫( permeate的过去式和过去分词 )； 遍布； 渗入； 渗透 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
88
panoramic
|
|
| adj. 全景的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
89
ecstasy
|
|
| n.狂喜，心醉神怡，入迷 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
90
pandemonium
|
|
| n.喧嚣，大混乱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
91
unwilling
|
|
| adj.不情愿的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
92
awakened
|
|
| v.（使）醒( awaken的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）觉醒；弄醒；（使）意识到 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
93
gossamer
|
|
| n.薄纱，游丝 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
94
liking
|
|
| n.爱好；嗜好；喜欢 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
95
gratitude
|
|
| adj.感激，感谢 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
96
onlooker
|
|
| n.旁观者，观众 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
97
intoxication
|
|
| n.wild excitement;drunkenness；poisoning | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
98
bereft
|
|
| adj.被剥夺的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
99
benignity
|
|
| n.仁慈 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
100
Oxford
|
|
| n.牛津（英国城市） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
101
justified
|
|
| a.正当的，有理的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |