—Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar.
From Diary:—For a day or two we have been plowing2 among an invisible vast wilderness3 of islands, catching4 now and then a shadowy glimpse of a member of it. There does seem to be a prodigious5 lot of islands this year; the map of this region is freckled6 and fly-specked all over with them. Their number would seem to be uncountable. We are moving among the Fijis now—224 islands and islets in the group. In front of us, to the west, the wilderness stretches toward Australia, then curves upward to New Guinea, and still up and up to Japan; behind us, to the east, the wilderness stretches sixty degrees across the wastes of the Pacific; south of us is New Zealand. Somewhere or other among these myriads7 Samoa is concealed8, and not discoverable on the map. Still, if you wish to go there, you will have no trouble about finding it if you follow the directions given by Robert Louis Stevenson to Dr. Conan Doyle and to Mr. J. M. Barrie. “You go to America, cross the continent to San Francisco, and then it’s the second turning to the left.” To get the full flavor of the joke one must take a glance at the map.
Wednesday, September 11.—Yesterday we passed close to an island or so, and recognized the published Fiji characteristics: a broad belt of clean white coral sand around the island; back of it a graceful9 fringe of leaning palms, with native huts nestling cosily10 among the shrubbery at their bases; back of these a stretch of level land clothed in tropic vegetation; back of that, rugged11 and picturesque12 mountains. A detail of the immediate13 foreground: a mouldering14 ship perched high up on a reef-bench. This completes the composition, and makes the picture artistically15 perfect.
In the afternoon we sighted Suva, the capital of the group, and threaded our way into the secluded16 little harbor—a placid17 basin of brilliant blue and green water tucked snugly18 in among the sheltering hills. A few ships rode at anchor in it—one of them a sailing vessel19 flying the American flag; and they said she came from Duluth! There’s a journey! Duluth is several thousand miles from the sea, and yet she is entitled to the proud name of Mistress of the Commercial Marine20 of the United States of America. There is only one free, independent, unsubsidized American ship sailing the foreign seas, and Duluth owns it. All by itself that ship is the American fleet. All by itself it causes the American name and power to be respected in the far regions of the globe. All by itself it certifies21 to the world that the most populous22 civilized23 nation, in the earth has a just pride in her stupendous stretch of sea-front, and is determined24 to assert and maintain her rightful place as one of the Great Maritime25 Powers of the Planet. All by itself it is making foreign eyes familiar with a Flag which they have not seen before for forty years, outside of the museum. For what Duluth has done, in building, equipping, and maintaining at her sole expense the American Foreign Commercial Fleet, and in thus rescuing the American name from shame and lifting it high for the homage26 of the nations, we owe her a debt of gratitude27 which our hearts shall confess with quickened beats whenever her name is named henceforth. Many national toasts will die in the lapse28 of time, but while the flag flies and the Republic survives, they who live under their shelter will still drink this one, standing29 and uncovered: Health and prosperity to Thee, O Duluth, American Queen of the Alien Seas!
Row-boats began to flock from the shore; their crews were the first natives we had seen. These men carried no overplus of clothing, and this was wise, for the weather was hot. Handsome, great dusky men they were, muscular, clean-limbed, and with faces full of character and intelligence. It would be hard to find their superiors anywhere among the dark races, I should think.
Everybody went ashore30 to look around, and spy out the land, and have that luxury of luxuries to sea-voyagers—a land-dinner. And there we saw more natives: Wrinkled old women, with their flat mammals flung over their shoulders, or hanging down in front like the cold-weather drip from the molasses-faucet; plump and smily young girls, blithe31 and content, easy and graceful, a pleasure to look at; young matrons, tall, straight, comely32, nobly built, sweeping33 by with chin up, and a gait incomparable for unconscious stateliness and dignity; majestic34 young men—athletes for build and muscle—clothed in a loose arrangement of dazzling white, with bronze breast and bronze legs naked, and the head a cannon-swab of solid hair combed straight out from the skull35 and dyed a rich brick-red. Only sixty years ago they were sunk in darkness; now they have the bicycle.
We strolled about the streets of the white folks’ little town, and around over the hills by paths and roads among European dwellings36 and gardens and plantations37, and past clumps38 of hibiscus that made a body blink, the great blossoms were so intensely red; and by and by we stopped to ask an elderly English colonist39 a question or two, and to sympathize with him concerning the torrid weather; but he was surprised, and said:
“This? This is not hot. You ought to be here in the summer time once.”
“We supposed that this was summer; it has the ear-marks of it. You could take it to almost any country and deceive people with it. But if it isn’t summer, what does it lack?”
“It lacks half a year. This is mid-winter."
I had been suffering from colds for several months, and a sudden change of season, like this, could hardly fail to do me hurt. It brought on another cold. It is odd, these sudden jumps from season to season. A fortnight ago we left America in mid-summer, now it is midwinter; about a week hence we shall arrive in Australia in the spring.
After dinner I found in the billiard-room a resident whom I had known somewhere else in the world, and presently made some new friends and drove with them out into the country to visit his Excellency the head of the State, who was occupying his country residence, to escape the rigors40 of the winter weather, I suppose, for it was on breezy high ground and much more comfortable than the lower regions, where the town is, and where the winter has full swing, and often sets a person’s hair afire when he takes off his hat to bow. There is a noble and beautiful view of ocean and islands and castellated peaks from the governor’s high-placed house, and its immediate surroundings lie drowsing in that dreamy repose41 and serenity42 which are the charm of life in the Pacific Islands.
One of the new friends who went out there with me was a large man, and I had been admiring his size all the way. I was still admiring it as he stood by the governor on the veranda43, talking; then the Fijian butler stepped out there to announce tea, and dwarfed44 him. Maybe he did not quite dwarf45 him, but at any rate the contrast was quite striking. Perhaps that dark giant was a king in a condition of political suspension. I think that in the talk there on the veranda it was said that in Fiji, as in the Sandwich Islands, native kings and chiefs are of much grander size and build than the commoners. This man was clothed in flowing white vestments, and they were just the thing for him; they comported46 well with his great stature47 and his kingly port and dignity. European clothes would have degraded him and made him commonplace. I know that, because they do that with everybody that wears them.
It was said that the old-time devotion to chiefs and reverence48 for their persons still survive in the native commoner, and in great force. The educated young gentleman who is chief of the tribe that live in the region about the capital dresses in the fashion of high-class European gentlemen, but even his clothes cannot damn him in the reverence of his people. Their pride in his lofty rank and ancient lineage lives on, in spite of his lost authority and the evil magic of his tailor. He has no need to defile49 himself with work, or trouble his heart with the sordid50 cares of life; the tribe will see to it that he shall not want, and that he shall hold up his head and live like a gentleman. I had a glimpse of him down in the town. Perhaps he is a descendant of the last king—the king with the difficult name whose memory is preserved by a notable monument of cut-stone which one sees in the enclosure in the middle of the town. Thakombau—I remember, now; that is the name. It is easier to preserve it on a granite51 block than in your head.
Fiji was ceded52 to England by this king in 1858. One of the gentlemen present at the governor’s quoted a remark made by the king at the time of the session—a neat retort, and with a touch of pathos53 in it, too. The English Commissioner54 had offered a crumb55 of comfort to Thakombau by saying that the transfer of the kingdom to Great Britain was merely “a sort of hermit-crab56 formality, you know.” “Yes,” said poor Thakombau, “but with this difference—the crab moves into an unoccupied shell, but mine isn’t.”
However, as far as I can make out from the books, the King was between the devil and the deep sea at the time, and hadn’t much choice. He owed the United States a large debt—a debt which he could pay if allowed time, but time was denied him. He must pay up right away or the warships57 would be upon him. To protect his people from this disaster he ceded his country to Britain, with a clause in the contract providing for the ultimate payment of the American debt.
In old times the Fijians were fierce fighters; they were very religious, and worshiped idols58; the big chiefs were proud and haughty59, and they were men of great style in many ways; all chiefs had several wives, the biggest chiefs sometimes had as many as fifty; when a chief was dead and ready for burial, four or five of his wives were strangled and put into the grave with him. In 1804 twenty-seven British convicts escaped from Australia to Fiji, and brought guns and ammunition60 with them. Consider what a power they were, armed like that, and what an opportunity they had. If they had been energetic men and sober, and had had brains and known how to use them, they could have achieved the sovereignty of the archipelago twenty-seven kings and each with eight or nine islands under his scepter. But nothing came of this chance. They lived worthless lives of sin and luxury, and died without honor—in most cases by violence. Only one of them had any ambition; he was an Irishman named Connor. He tried to raise a family of fifty children, and scored forty-eight. He died lamenting61 his failure. It was a foolish sort of avarice62. Many a father would have been rich enough with forty.
It is a fine race, the Fijians, with brains in their heads, and an inquiring turn of mind. It appears that their savage63 ancestors had a doctrine64 of immortality66 in their scheme of religion—with limitations. That is to say, their dead friend would go to a happy hereafter if he could be accumulated, but not otherwise. They drew the line; they thought that the missionary67’s doctrine was too sweeping, too comprehensive. They called his attention to certain facts. For instance, many of their friends had been devoured68 by sharks; the sharks, in their turn, were caught and eaten by other men; later, these men were captured in war, and eaten by the enemy. The original persons had entered into the composition of the sharks; next, they and the sharks had become part of the flesh and blood and bone of the cannibals. How, then, could the particles of the original men be searched out from the final conglomerate69 and put together again? The inquirers were full of doubts, and considered that the missionary had not examined the matter with the gravity and attention which so serious a thing deserved.
The missionary taught these exacting70 savages71 many valuable things, and got from them one—a very dainty and poetical72 idea: Those wild and ignorant poor children of Nature believed that the flowers, after they perish, rise on the winds and float away to the fair fields of heaven, and flourish there forever in immortal65 beauty!
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1
economize
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| v.节约，节省 | |
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plowing
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| v.耕( plow的现在分词 )；犁耕；费力穿过 | |
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wilderness
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| n.杳无人烟的一片陆地、水等，荒漠 | |
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catching
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| adj.易传染的，有魅力的，迷人的，接住 | |
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prodigious
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| adj.惊人的，奇妙的；异常的；巨大的；庞大的 | |
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freckled
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| adj.雀斑；斑点；晒斑；（使）生雀斑v.雀斑，斑点( freckle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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myriads
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| n.无数，极大数量( myriad的名词复数 ) | |
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concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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graceful
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| adj.优美的，优雅的；得体的 | |
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cosily
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| adv.舒适地，惬意地 | |
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rugged
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| adj.高低不平的，粗糙的，粗壮的，强健的 | |
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picturesque
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| adj.美丽如画的，（语言）生动的，绘声绘色的 | |
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immediate
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| adj.立即的；直接的，最接近的；紧靠的 | |
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mouldering
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| v.腐朽( moulder的现在分词 )；腐烂，崩塌 | |
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artistically
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| adv.艺术性地 | |
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secluded
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| adj.与世隔绝的；隐退的；偏僻的v.使隔开，使隐退( seclude的过去式和过去分词) | |
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placid
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| adj.安静的，平和的 | |
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snugly
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| adv.紧贴地；贴身地；暖和舒适地；安适地 | |
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vessel
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| n.船舶；容器，器皿；管，导管，血管 | |
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marine
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| adj.海的；海生的；航海的；海事的；n.水兵 | |
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certifies
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| （尤指书面）证明( certify的第三人称单数 )； 发证书给…； 证明（某人）患有精神病； 颁发（或授予）专业合格证书 | |
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populous
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| adj.人口稠密的，人口众多的 | |
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civilized
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| a.有教养的，文雅的 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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maritime
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| adj.海的，海事的，航海的，近海的，沿海的 | |
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homage
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| n.尊敬，敬意，崇敬 | |
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gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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lapse
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| n.过失，流逝，失效，抛弃信仰，间隔；vi.堕落，停止，失效，流逝；vt.使失效 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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ashore
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| adv.在(向)岸上，上岸 | |
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blithe
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| adj.快乐的，无忧无虑的 | |
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comely
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| adj.漂亮的，合宜的 | |
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sweeping
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| adj.范围广大的，一扫无遗的 | |
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majestic
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| adj.雄伟的，壮丽的，庄严的，威严的，崇高的 | |
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skull
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| n.头骨；颅骨 | |
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dwellings
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| n.住处，处所( dwelling的名词复数 ) | |
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plantations
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| n.种植园，大农场( plantation的名词复数 ) | |
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clumps
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| n.（树、灌木、植物等的）丛、簇( clump的名词复数 )；（土、泥等）团；块；笨重的脚步声v.（树、灌木、植物等的）丛、簇( clump的第三人称单数 )；（土、泥等）团；块；笨重的脚步声 | |
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colonist
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| n.殖民者，移民 | |
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rigors
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| 严格( rigor的名词复数 )； 严酷； 严密； （由惊吓或中毒等导致的身体）僵直 | |
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repose
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| v.(使)休息；n.安息 | |
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serenity
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| n.宁静，沉着，晴朗 | |
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veranda
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| n.走廊；阳台 | |
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44
dwarfed
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| vt.（使）显得矮小（dwarf的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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dwarf
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| n.矮子，侏儒，矮小的动植物；vt.使…矮小 | |
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comported
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| v.表现( comport的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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47
stature
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| n.（高度）水平，（高度）境界，身高，身材 | |
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48
reverence
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| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
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49
defile
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| v.弄污，弄脏；n.(山间)小道 | |
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50
sordid
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| adj.肮脏的，不干净的，卑鄙的，暗淡的 | |
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51
granite
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| adj.花岗岩，花岗石 | |
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52
ceded
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| v.让给，割让，放弃( cede的过去式 ) | |
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pathos
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| n.哀婉，悲怆 | |
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commissioner
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| n.（政府厅、局、处等部门）专员，长官，委员 | |
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crumb
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| n.饼屑，面包屑，小量 | |
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56
crab
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| n.螃蟹，偏航，脾气乖戾的人，酸苹果；vi.捕蟹，偏航，发牢骚；vt.使偏航，发脾气 | |
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57
warships
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| 军舰，战舰( warship的名词复数 )； 舰只 | |
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idols
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| 偶像( idol的名词复数 )； 受崇拜的人或物； 受到热爱和崇拜的人或物； 神像 | |
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haughty
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| adj.傲慢的，高傲的 | |
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ammunition
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| n.军火，弹药 | |
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61
lamenting
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| adj.悲伤的，悲哀的v.（为…）哀悼，痛哭，悲伤( lament的现在分词 ) | |
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avarice
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| n.贪婪；贪心 | |
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savage
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| adj.野蛮的；凶恶的，残暴的；n.未开化的人 | |
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doctrine
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| n.教义；主义；学说 | |
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immortal
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| adj.不朽的；永生的，不死的；神的 | |
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immortality
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| n.不死，不朽 | |
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missionary
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| adj.教会的，传教(士)的；n.传教士 | |
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68
devoured
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| 吞没( devour的过去式和过去分词 )； 耗尽； 津津有味地看； 狼吞虎咽地吃光 | |
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conglomerate
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| n.综合商社，多元化集团公司 | |
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exacting
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| adj.苛求的，要求严格的 | |
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savages
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| 未开化的人，野蛮人( savage的名词复数 ) | |
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poetical
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| adj.似诗人的；诗一般的；韵文的；富有诗意的 | |
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