—Pudd’nhead Wilson’s New Calendar.
The next picture that drifts across the field of my memory is one which is connected with religious things. We were taken by friends to see a Jain temple. It was small, and had many flags or streamers flying from poles standing2 above its roof; and its little battlements supported a great many small idols3 or images. Upstairs, inside, a solitary5 Jain was praying or reciting aloud in the middle of the room. Our presence did not interrupt him, nor even incommode him or modify his fervor6. Ten or twelve feet in front of him was the idol4, a small figure in a sitting posture7. It had the pinkish look of a wax doll, but lacked the doll’s roundness of limb and approximation to correctness of form and justness of proportion. Mr. Gandhi explained every thing to us. He was delegate to the Chicago Fair Congress of Religions. It was lucidly8 done, in masterly English, but in time it faded from me, and now I have nothing left of that episode but an impression: a dim idea of a religious belief clothed in subtle intellectual forms, lofty and clean, barren of fleshly grossnesses; and with this another dim impression which connects that intellectual system somehow with that crude image, that inadequate9 idol—how, I do not know. Properly they do not seem to belong together. Apparently10 the idol symbolized11 a person who had become a saint or a god through accessions of steadily12 augmenting13 holiness acquired through a series of reincarnations and promotions14 extending over many ages; and was now at last a saint and qualified15 to vicariously receive worship and transmit it to heaven’s chancellery. Was that it?
And thence we went to Mr. Premchand Roychand’s bungalow16, in Lovelane, Byculla, where an Indian prince was to receive a deputation of the Jain community who desired to congratulate him upon a high honor lately conferred upon him by his sovereign, Victoria, Empress of India. She had made him a knight17 of the order of the Star of India. It would seem that even the grandest Indian prince is glad to add the modest title “Sir” to his ancient native grandeurs, and is willing to do valuable service to win it. He will remit18 taxes liberally, and will spend money freely upon the betterment of the condition of his subjects, if there is a knighthood to be gotten by it. And he will also do good work and a deal of it to get a gun added to the salute19 allowed him by the British Government. Every year the Empress distributes knighthoods and adds guns for public services done by native princes. The salute of a small prince is three or four guns; princes of greater consequence have salutes20 that run higher and higher, gun by gun,—oh, clear away up to eleven; possibly more, but I did not hear of any above eleven-gun princes. I was told that when a four-gun prince gets a gun added, he is pretty troublesome for a while, till the novelty wears off, for he likes the music, and keeps hunting up pretexts22 to get himself saluted23. It may be that supremely24 grand folk, like the Nyzam of Hyderabad and the Gaikwar of Baroda, have more than eleven guns, but I don’t know.
When we arrived at the bungalow, the large hall on the ground floor was already about full, and carriages were still flowing into the grounds. The company present made a fine show, an exhibition of human fireworks, so to speak, in the matters of costume and comminglings of brilliant color. The variety of form noticeable in the display of turbans was remarkable25. We were told that the explanation of this was, that this Jain delegation26 was drawn27 from many parts of India, and that each man wore the turban that was in vogue28 in his own region. This diversity of turbans made a beautiful effect.
I could have wished to start a rival exhibition there, of Christian29 hats and clothes. I would have cleared one side of the room of its Indian splendors30 and repacked the space with Christians31 drawn from America, England, and the Colonies, dressed in the hats and habits of now, and of twenty and forty and fifty years ago. It would have been a hideous32 exhibition, a thoroughly33 devilish spectacle. Then there would have been the added disadvantage of the white complexion34. It is not an unbearably35 unpleasant complexion when it keeps to itself, but when it comes into competition with masses of brown and black the fact is betrayed that it is endurable only because we are used to it. Nearly all black and brown skins are beautiful, but a beautiful white skin is rare. How rare, one may learn by walking down a street in Paris, New York, or London on a week-day—particularly an unfashionable street—and keeping count of the satisfactory complexions36 encountered in the course of a mile. Where dark complexions are massed, they make the whites look bleached-out, unwholesome, and sometimes frankly37 ghastly. I could notice this as a boy, down South in the slavery days before the war. The splendid black satin skin of the South African Zulus of Durban seemed to me to come very close to perfection. I can see those Zulus yet—‘ricksha athletes waiting in front of the hotel for custom; handsome and intensely black creatures, moderately clothed in loose summer stuffs whose snowy whiteness made the black all the blacker by contrast. Keeping that group in my mind, I can compare those complexions with the white ones which are streaming past this London window now:
A lady. Complexion, new parchment. Another lady. Complexion, old parchment.
Another. Pink and white, very fine.
Man. Grayish skin, with purple areas.
Man. Unwholesome fish-belly skin.
Old woman. Face whitey-gray.
Young butcher. Face a general red flush.
Jaundiced man—mustard yellow.
Elderly man—a drinker. Boiled-cauliflower nose in a flabby face veined with purple crinklings.
Healthy young gentleman. Fine fresh complexion.
Sick young man. His face a ghastly white.
No end of people whose skins are dull and characterless modifications41 of the tint42 which we miscall white. Some of these faces are pimply43; some exhibit other signs of diseased blood; some show scars of a tint out of a harmony with the surrounding shades of color. The white man’s complexion makes no concealments. It can’t. It seemed to have been designed as a catch-all for everything that can damage it. Ladies have to paint it, and powder it, and cosmetic44 it, and diet it with arsenic45, and enamel46 it, and be always enticing47 it, and persuading it, and pestering48 it, and fussing at it, to make it beautiful; and they do not succeed. But these efforts show what they think of the natural complexion, as distributed. As distributed it needs these helps. The complexion which they try to counterfeit49 is one which nature restricts to the few—to the very few. To ninety-nine persons she gives a bad complexion, to the hundredth a good one. The hundredth can keep it—how long? Ten years, perhaps.
The advantage is with the Zulu, I think. He starts with a beautiful complexion, and it will last him through. And as for the Indian brown—firm, smooth, blemishless, pleasant and restful to the eye, afraid of no color, harmonizing with all colors and adding a grace to them all—I think there is no sort of chance for the average white complexion against that rich and perfect tint.
To return to the bungalow. The most gorgeous costumes present were worn by some children. They seemed to blaze, so bright were the colors, and so brilliant the jewels strewing50 over the rich materials. These children were professional nautch-dancers, and looked like girls, but they were boys. They got up by ones and twos and fours, and danced and sang to an accompaniment of weird51 music. Their posturings and gesturings were elaborate and graceful52, but their voices were stringently53 raspy and unpleasant, and there was a good deal of monotony about the tune54.
By and by there was a burst of shouts and cheers outside and the prince with his train entered in fine dramatic style. He was a stately man, he was ideally costumed, and fairly festooned with ropes of gems55; some of the ropes were of pearls, some were of uncut great emeralds—emeralds renowned56 in Bombay for their quality and value. Their size was marvelous, and enticing to the eye, those rocks. A boy—a princeling—was with the prince, and he also was a radiant exhibition.
The ceremonies were not tedious. The prince strode to his throne with the port and majesty57—and the sternness—of a Julius Caesar coming to receive and receipt for a back-country kingdom and have it over and get out, and no fooling. There was a throne for the young prince, too, and the two sat there, side by side, with their officers grouped at either hand and most accurately58 and creditably reproducing the pictures which one sees in the books—pictures which people in the prince’s line of business have been furnishing ever since Solomon received the Queen of Sheba and showed her his things. The chief of the Jain delegation read his paper of congratulations, then pushed it into a beautifully engraved59 silver cylinder60, which was delivered with ceremony into the prince’s hands and at once delivered by him without ceremony into the hands of an officer. I will copy the address here. It is interesting, as showing what an Indian prince’s subject may have opportunity to thank him for in these days of modern English rule, as contrasted with what his ancestor would have given them opportunity to thank him for a century and a half ago—the days of freedom unhampered by English interference. A century and a half ago an address of thanks could have been put into small space. It would have thanked the prince—
4. For not killing64, blinding, imprisoning65, or banishing66 the relatives of the royal house to protect the throne from possible plots;
5. For not betraying the subject secretly, for a bribe67, into the hands of bands of professional Thugs, to be murdered and robbed in the prince’s back lot.
Those were rather common princely industries in the old times, but they and some others of a harsh sort ceased long ago under English rule. Better industries have taken their place, as this Address from the Jain community will show:
“Your Highness,—We the undersigned members of the Jain community of Bombay have the pleasure to approach your Highness with the expression of our heartfelt congratulations on the recent conference on your Highness of the Knighthood of the Most Exalted68 Order of the Star of India. Ten years ago we had the pleasure and privilege of welcoming your Highness to this city under circumstances which have made a memorable69 epoch70 in the history of your State, for had it not been for a generous and reasonable spirit that your Highness displayed in the negotiations71 between the Palitana Durbar and the Jain community, the conciliatory spirit that animated72 our people could not have borne fruit. That was the first step in your Highness’s administration, and it fitly elicited73 the praise of the Jain community, and of the Bombay Government. A decade of your Highness’s administration, combined with the abilities, training, and acquirements that your Highness brought to bear upon it, has justly earned for your Highness the unique and honourable74 distinction—the Knighthood of the Most Exalted Order of the Star of India, which we understand your Highness is the first to enjoy among Chiefs of your Highness’s rank and standing. And we assure your Highness that for this mark of honour that has been conferred on you by Her Most Gracious Majesty, the Queen-Empress, we feel no less proud than your Highness. Establishment of commercial factories, schools, hospitals, etc., by your Highness in your State has marked your Highness’s career during these ten years, and we trust that your Highness will be spared to rule over your people with wisdom and foresight75, and foster the many reforms that your Highness has been pleased to introduce in your State. We again offer your Highness our warmest felicitations for the honour that has been conferred on you. We beg to remain your Highness’s obedient servants.”
Factories, schools, hospitals, reforms. The prince propagates that kind of things in the modern times, and gets knighthood and guns for it.
After the address the prince responded with snap and brevity; spoke76 a moment with half a dozen guests in English, and with an official or two in a native tongue; then the garlands were distributed as usual, and the function ended.
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1
ascend
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| vi.渐渐上升，升高；vt.攀登，登上 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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idols
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| 偶像( idol的名词复数 )； 受崇拜的人或物； 受到热爱和崇拜的人或物； 神像 | |
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idol
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| n.偶像，红人，宠儿 | |
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solitary
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| adj.孤独的，独立的，荒凉的；n.隐士 | |
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fervor
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| n.热诚；热心；炽热 | |
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posture
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| n.姿势，姿态，心态，态度；v.作出某种姿势 | |
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lucidly
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| adv.清透地，透明地 | |
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9
inadequate
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| adj.(for,to)不充足的，不适当的 | |
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10
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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symbolized
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| v.象征，作为…的象征( symbolize的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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12
steadily
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| adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地 | |
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13
augmenting
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| 使扩张 | |
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14
promotions
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| 促进( promotion的名词复数 )； 提升； 推广； 宣传 | |
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15
qualified
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| adj.合格的，有资格的，胜任的，有限制的 | |
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16
bungalow
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| n.平房，周围有阳台的木造小平房 | |
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17
knight
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| n.骑士，武士；爵士 | |
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18
remit
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| v.汇款，汇寄；豁免（债务），免除（处罚等） | |
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19
salute
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| vi.行礼，致意，问候，放礼炮；vt.向…致意，迎接，赞扬；n.招呼，敬礼，礼炮 | |
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20
salutes
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| n.致敬，欢迎，敬礼( salute的名词复数 )v.欢迎，致敬( salute的第三人称单数 )；赞扬，赞颂 | |
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21
pretext
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| n.借口，托词 | |
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pretexts
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| n.借口，托辞( pretext的名词复数 ) | |
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23
saluted
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| v.欢迎，致敬( salute的过去式和过去分词 )；赞扬，赞颂 | |
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24
supremely
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| adv.无上地，崇高地 | |
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25
remarkable
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| adj.显著的，异常的，非凡的，值得注意的 | |
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26
delegation
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| n.代表团；派遣 | |
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27
drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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28
Vogue
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| n.时髦，时尚；adj.流行的 | |
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29
Christian
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| adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒 | |
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30
splendors
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| n.华丽( splendor的名词复数 )；壮丽；光辉；显赫 | |
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31
Christians
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| n.基督教徒( Christian的名词复数 ) | |
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32
hideous
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| adj.丑陋的，可憎的，可怕的，恐怖的 | |
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33
thoroughly
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| adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地 | |
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34
complexion
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| n.肤色；情况，局面；气质，性格 | |
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unbearably
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| adv.不能忍受地，无法容忍地；慌 | |
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complexions
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| 肤色( complexion的名词复数 )； 面色； 局面； 性质 | |
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frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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38
freckles
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| n.雀斑，斑点( freckle的名词复数 ) | |
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conspicuous
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| adj.明眼的，惹人注目的；炫耀的，摆阔气的 | |
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40
moles
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| 防波堤( mole的名词复数 )； 鼹鼠； 痣； 间谍 | |
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41
modifications
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| n.缓和( modification的名词复数 )；限制；更改；改变 | |
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42
tint
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| n.淡色，浅色；染发剂；vt.着以淡淡的颜色 | |
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43
pimply
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| adj.肿泡的；有疙瘩的；多粉刺的；有丘疹的 | |
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44
cosmetic
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| n.化妆品；adj.化妆用的；装门面的；装饰性的 | |
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45
arsenic
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| n.砒霜，砷；adj.砷的 | |
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46
enamel
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| n.珐琅，搪瓷，瓷釉；(牙齿的)珐琅质 | |
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47
enticing
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| adj.迷人的；诱人的 | |
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48
pestering
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| 使烦恼，纠缠( pester的现在分词 ) | |
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49
counterfeit
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| vt.伪造，仿造；adj.伪造的，假冒的 | |
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50
strewing
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| v.撒在…上( strew的现在分词 )；散落于；点缀；撒满 | |
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51
weird
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| adj.古怪的，离奇的；怪诞的，神秘而可怕的 | |
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52
graceful
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| adj.优美的，优雅的；得体的 | |
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53
stringently
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| adv.严格地，严厉地 | |
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54
tune
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| n.调子；和谐，协调；v.调音，调节，调整 | |
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55
gems
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| growth； economy； management； and customer satisfaction 增长 | |
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56
renowned
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| adj.著名的，有名望的，声誉鹊起的 | |
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57
majesty
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| n.雄伟，壮丽，庄严，威严；最高权威，王权 | |
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58
accurately
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| adv.准确地，精确地 | |
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59
engraved
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| v.在（硬物）上雕刻（字，画等）( engrave的过去式和过去分词 )；将某事物深深印在（记忆或头脑中） | |
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60
cylinder
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| n.圆筒，柱(面)，汽缸 | |
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61
slaughtering
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| v.屠杀，杀戮，屠宰( slaughter的现在分词 ) | |
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62
mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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63
levies
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| （部队）征兵( levy的名词复数 )； 募捐； 被征募的军队 | |
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64
killing
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| n.巨额利润；突然赚大钱，发大财 | |
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imprisoning
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| v.下狱，监禁( imprison的现在分词 ) | |
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66
banishing
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| v.放逐，驱逐( banish的现在分词 ) | |
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67
bribe
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| n.贿赂；v.向…行贿，买通 | |
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68
exalted
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| adj.(地位等)高的，崇高的；尊贵的，高尚的 | |
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69
memorable
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| adj.值得回忆的，难忘的，特别的，显著的 | |
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70
epoch
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| n.(新)时代；历元 | |
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71
negotiations
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| 协商( negotiation的名词复数 )； 谈判； 完成（难事）； 通过 | |
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72
animated
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| adj.生气勃勃的，活跃的，愉快的 | |
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73
elicited
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| 引出，探出( elicit的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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74
honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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75
foresight
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| n.先见之明，深谋远虑 | |
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76
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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