Tom was considering where he should pass the intervening time when the following note unnerved him.
Dear Mr. Whitelaw
Mother wants to know if when college closes, and Guy joins us in New Hampshire, you will not come with him for the three weeks before you start on your trip. Please do. I shall have got there by that time, and I haven't seen you now for nearly two years. We must have a lot of notes to compare, and ought to be busy comparing them. Do come then, for our sakes if not for your own. You will give us a great deal of pleasure.
Yours very sincerely,
Hildred Ansley.
His heart failed him. It failed him because of the details as to customs, etiquette3, and dress he didn't know anything about. He should be called on to speak fluently in a language of which he was only
[Pg 331]
beginning to spell out the little words. It seemed to him at first that he couldn't accept the invitation.
Then, not to accept it began to look like cowardice4. He would never get anywhere if he funked what he didn't know. When you didn't know you went to work and found out. You couldn't find out unless you put yourself in the way of seeing what other people did. After twenty-four hours of reflection he penned the simplest form of note. Thanking Hildred for her mother's kind invitation, he accepted it. Before putting his letter in the post, however, he dropped in to call on Guy. Guy, who was strumming the Love-Death of Isolde, tossed his comments over his shoulder as he thumped5 out the passion.
"That's Hildred. She's made mother do it. Nutty on that sort of thing."
Tom's heart failed him again. "Nutty on what sort of thing?"
Isolde's anguish6 mounted and mounted till it seemed as if it couldn't mount any higher, and yet went on mounting. "Oh, well! She's toted it up that you haven't got a home—that for three weeks after college closes you'll be on the town—and so on."
"I see."
"All the same, come along. I'd just as soon. Dad won't be there hardly. The old lady'll be booming about, but you needn't mind her. You'll have your room and grub for those three weeks, and that's all you've got to think about. Anyhow, it's bats in the attic7 with Hildred the minute it comes to a lame8 dog."
While Guy's fat figure swayed over the piano, Isolde's great heart broke. Tom went back to his
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room and wrote a second answer, regretting that owing to the pressure of his engagements he would be unable....
And then there came another reaction. What did it matter if Hildred Ansley was opening the door out of pity? Pity was one of the loveliest traits of character. Only a cad would resent it. He sent his first reply.
Having done this, he felt it right to go and call on Mrs. Ansley. He was sure she didn't want him in New Hampshire, but by taking it for granted that she did he would discount some of her embarrassment9.
As Mrs. Ansley was not at home Pilcher held out a little silver tray. Tom understood that he should have had a card to put in it. A card was something of which he had never hitherto felt the need. He said so to Pilcher frankly10.
Pilcher's stony11 medieval face, the face of a saint on the portal of some primitive13 cathedral, smiled rarely, but when it did it smiled engagingly.
"You'll find a visitin' card very 'andy, Mr. Tom, now that you're so big. Mr. Guy has had one this long spell back."
It was a lead. In shy unobtrusive ways Pilcher had often shown himself his friend. Tom confessed his yearning14 for a card if only he knew how to order one.
"I'll show you one of Mr. Guy's. He always has the right thing. I'll find out too where he gets them done. If you'll step in, Mr. Tom...."
As he waited in the dining room, with the good-natured Ansley ancestor smiling down at him, there
[Pg 333]
floated through Tom's mind a phrase from the Bible as taught by Mrs. Tollivant. "The Lord sent His angel." Wasn't that what He was doing now, and wasn't the angel taking Pilcher's guise15? When the heavenly messenger came back with the card Tom went straight to his point.
"Pilcher, I wonder if you'd mind helping16 me?"
"I'd do it and welcome, Mr. Tom."
Mr. Tom told of his invitation to New Hampshire, and of his ignorance of what to do and wear. If Pilcher would only give him a hint....
He could not have found a better guide. Pilcher explained that a few little things had to be as second nature. A few other little things were uncertain points as to which it was always permissible17 to ask. In the way of second nature Tom would find sporting flannels18 and tennis shoes an essential. So he would find a dinner-jacket suit, with the right kind of shirt, collar, tie, shoes, and socks to wear with it. As to things permissible to ask about, Pilcher could more easily explain them when they were both in the same house. Occasions would crop up, but could not be foreseen.
"The real gentry19 is ever afraid of showin' that they don't know. They takes not knowin' as a joke. Many's the time when I've been waitin' at table I've 'eard a born gentleman ask the born lady sittin' next to 'im which'd be the right fork to use, and she'd say that she didn't know but was lookin' round to see what other people done. That's what they calls hease of manner, Mr. Tom."
Under the Ansley roof he would meet none but the
[Pg 334]
gentry born. Any one of them would respect him more for asking when he didn't know. It was only the second class that bothered about being so terribly correct, and they were not invited by Mrs. Ansley. In addition to these consoling facts Tom could always fall back on him, Pilcher, as a referee20.
Being a guest in a community in which two years earlier he had been a chauffeur21 Tom found easier than he had expected because he worked out a formula. He framed his formula before going to New Hampshire.
"Servants are servants and masters are masters because they divide themselves into classes. The one is above, and is recognized as being above; the other is below, and is recognized as being below. I shall be neither below nor above; or I shall be both. I will not go into a class. As far as I know how I'll be everybody's equal."
He had, however, to find another formula for this.
"You're everybody's equal when you know you are. Whatever you know will go of itself. The trouble I see with the bumptious22 American, who claims that he's as good as anybody else, is that he thinks only of forcing himself to the level of the highest; he doesn't begin at the bottom, and cover all the ground between the bottom and the top. I'm going to do that. I shall be at home among the lot of them. To be at home I must feel at home. I mustn't condescend23 to the boys of two years ago who'll still be driving cars, and I mustn't put on airs to be fit for Mrs. Ansley's drawing-room. I must be myself. I mustn't be ashamed because I've been in a
[Pg 335]
humble position; and I mustn't be swanky because I've been put in a better one. I must be natural; I must be big. That'll give me the ease of manner Pilcher talks about."
With these principles as a basis of behavior, his embarrassments24 sprang from another source. They began at the station in Keene. He knew he was to be met; and he supposed it would be by Guy.
"Oh, here you are!"
She came on him suddenly in the crowd, tall, free in her movements, always a little older than her age. If in the nearly two years since their last meeting changes had come to him, more had apparently25 come to her. She was a woman, while he was not yet a man. She was easy, independent, taking the lead with natural authority. From the first instant of shaking hands he felt in her something solicitous26 and protective.
It showed itself in the little things as to which awkwardness or diffidence on his part might have been presumed. So as not to leave him in doubt of what he ought to do, she took the initiative with an air of quiet, competent command. She led the way to the car; she told him to throw his handbags and coat into the back part of it; she made him sit beside her as she drove.
"No, I'm going to drive," she insisted, when he had offered to take the wheel. "I want you to see how well I can do it. I like showing off. This is my own car. I drove it all last summer."
They talked about cars and their makes because the topic was an easy one.
[Pg 336]
Speeding out of Keene, they left behind them the meadows of the Ashuelot to climb into a country with which Nature had been busy ever since her first flaming forces had cooled down to form a world. Cooling down and flinging up, she had tossed into the azoic age a tumble of mountains higher doubtless than Andes or Alps. Barren, stupendous, appalling27, they would not have been easy for man, when he came, to live with in comfort, had not the great Earth-Mother gone to some pains to polish them down. Taking her leisure through eons of years, she brought from the north her implement28, the ice. Without haste, without rest, a few inches in a century, she pushed it against the barrier she meant to mold and penetrate29.
As a dyke30 before the pressure of a flood, the barrier broke here, broke there, and yet as a whole maintained itself. Heights were cut off from heights. Valleys were carved between them. What was sharp became rounded; what was jagged was worn smooth. The highest pinnacles31 crashed down. When after thousands of years the glacial mass receded32, only the stumps33 were left of what had once been terrific primordial34 elevations35.
Dense36 forests began to cover them. Lakes formed in the hollows. Little rivers drained them, to be drained themselves by a nameless stream which fell into a nameless sea. Through ages and ages the thrushes sang, the wild bees hummed, and the bear, the deer, the fox, the lynx ranged freely.
Man came. He came stealthily, unnoted, leaving so light a trace that nothing remains37 to tell of his
[Pg 337]
first passage but a few mysterious syllables38. The river once nameless became the Connecticut; the base of a mighty39 primeval mountain bears the Nipmuck name Monadnock.
In this angle of New Hampshire thrust in between Massachusetts and Vermont names are a living record. The Nipmuck disappeared in proportion as the restless English colonists40 pushed farther and farther from the sea. They came in little companies, generally urged by some religious disagreement with those they had left behind. To escape the "Congregational way" they fled into the mountains. There they were free to follow the "Episcoparian way." As "Episcoparians" they printed the map with names which enshrined their old-home memories. Clustering within sight of the blue mass of Monadnock are neat white towns—Marlborough, Richmond, Chesterfield, Walpole, Peterborough, Fitzwilliam, Winchester—rich with "Episcoparian" suggestion.
In the early eighteenth century there came in another strain. Driven by famine, a thousand pilgrims arrived in these relatively41 empty lands from the North of Ireland, sturdy, strong-minded, Protestant. Grouping themselves into three communities, they named them with Irish names, Antrim, Hillsborough, Dublin. It was to Dublin that Tom and Hildred were on the way.
The subject of cars exhausted42, she swung to something else.
"You like the idea of going with Guy?"
"It's great."
"I like it too. I'd rather he was with you than
[Pg 338]
with anybody. You never make game of him, and yet you never humor him."
"What do you mean by that, that I never humor him?"
"Oh, well! Guy's standards aren't very high. We know that. But you never lower yours."
"How do you know I don't?"
"Because Guy says so. Don't imagine for a minute that he doesn't see. He likes you so much because he respects you."
"He respects a lot of other fellows too."
A little "H'm!" through pursed-up lips was a sign of dissent43. "I wonder. He goes with them, I know, and rather envies them, which is what I mean by his standards not being very high; but—"
"Oh, Guy's all right. The fellows you speak of are sometimes a little fresh; but he knows where to draw the line. He'll go to a certain point; but you won't get him beyond it."
"And he owes that to you."
"Oh, no, he doesn't, not in the least."
"Well, I—" she held the personal pronoun for emphasis—"think he does."
In this good opinion she was able to be firm because she seemed older than he. In reality she was two years younger, but life in a larger society had given her something of the tone of a woman of the world. This development on her part disconcerted him. So long as she had been the slip of a thing he remembered, prim12, sedate44, old-fashioned as the term is applied45 to children, she had not been a factor in his relations with the Ansley family. Now, sud
[Pg 339]
denly, he saw her as the most important factor of all. The emergence46 of personality troubled him. Since she was obliged to keep her eyes on the turnings of the road, he was able to study her in profile.
It was the first time he had really looked at a woman since he had summed up Maisie in Nashua. That had been two months earlier. The place which Maisie had so long held in his heart had been empty for those two months, except for a great bitterness. It was the bitterness of disillusion47, of futility48. Rage and pain were in it, with more of mortification49 than there was of either. He would never again hear of a cheap skate without thinking of the figure he had cut in the eyes of the girl whom he thought he was honoring merely in being true. All girls had been hateful to him since that day, just as all boys will be to a dog who has been stoned by one of them. Yet here he was already looking at a girl with something like fascination50.
That was because fascination was the emotion she evoked51. She was strange; she was arresting. You wondered what she was like. You watched her when she moved; you listened to her when she talked. Once you had heard her voice, bell-like and crystalline, you would always be able to recall it.
He noticed the way she was dressed because her knitted silk sweater was of a pattern he had never seen before. It ran in horizontal dog-toothed bands, shading from green to blue, and from blue to a dull red. Green was the predominating color, grass-green, jade-green, sea-green, sage-green, but toned to sobriety by this red of old brick, this blue of indigo52. Indigo
[Pg 340]
was the short plain skirt, and the stockings below it. An indigo tam-o'-shanter was pinned to her smooth, glossy53, bluish-black hair with a big carnelian pin. He remembered that he used to think her Cambodian. He thought so again.
Having arrived at the house, they found no one but Pilcher to receive them. Mrs. Ansley had gone out to tea; Mr. Guy had left word for Miss Hildred to bring Mr. Tom to the club, where he was playing tennis.
"Do you care to go?"
Knowing that he couldn't spend three weeks in Dublin without facing this invitation, he had decided54 in advance to accept it the first time it came.
"If you go."
"All right; let's. But you'd like first to go to your room, wouldn't you? Pilcher, take Mr. Whitelaw up. I'll wait here with the car. We'll start as soon as you come down." Running up the stairs, he wondered whether it would be the proper thing for him to change to his new white flannels, when, as if divining his perplexity, she called after him. "Come just as you are. Don't stop to put on other things. I'll go as I am too."
This maternal55 foresight56 was again on guard as they turned from the road into the driveway to the club.
"Do you want to come and be introduced to a lot of people, or would you rather browse57 about by yourself? You can do whichever you like."
He replied with a suggestion. As a good many cars would be parked in the narrow space of the
[Pg 341]
club avenues, he thought she had better jump out at the club steps, leaving him to find a space where the car could stand. He would hang around there till Guy's game was over and the party was ready to go home.
Having parked the car, he was in with the chauffeurs58, some of whom were old acquaintances. True to his formula, he went about among them, shaking hands, and asking for their news. They were oddly alike, not only in their dustcoats and chauffeurs' caps, but in features and cast of mind.
"You got a job?" he was asked in his turn.
"Been taken on to travel with young Ansley. We stay here for three weeks, and then go out west."
"Loot pretty good?"
"Oh, just about the same, and, of course, I get my expenses."
"Pretty soft, what?" came from an Englishman.
"Yes, but then it's only for the summer."
These duties done, he felt free to stroll off till he found a convenient rock on which to sit by the lakeside. Lighting59 a cigarette, he was glad of a half hour to himself in which to enjoy the scene. It was a reposeful60 scene, because all that was human and sporting in it was lost in the living spirit of the background.
It was what he had always felt in this particular landscape, and had never been able to define till now—its quality of life. It was life of another order from physical life, and on another plane. You might have said that it reached you out of some phase of creation different from that of Earth. These hills were living
[Pg 342]
hills; this lake was a living lake. Through them, as in the serene61 sky, a Presence shone and smiled on you. He had often noticed, during the summer at the inn-club, that you could sit idle and silent with that Presence, and not be bored. You looked and looked; you thought and thought; you were bathed about in tranquillity62. People might be running around, and calling or shouting, as they were doing now in the tennis courts on a ledge63 of the hillside above him, not five hundred yards away, but they disturbed you no more than the birds or the butterflies. The Presence was too immense, too positive, to allow little things to trouble it. Rather, it took them and absorbed them, as if the Supreme64 Activity, which for millions of years before there was a man had been working to transform this spot into a cup of overflowing65 loveliness, could use anything that came Its way.
So he sat and smoked and thought and felt soothed66. It was early enough in the summer for the birds to be singing from all the wooded terraces and the fringe of lakeside trees. Calls from the tennis courts, cries from young people climbing on the raft in the lake or diving from the spring-board, came to him softened67 and sweet. It was living peace, invigorating, restful.
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1
westward
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| n.西方，西部；adj.西方的，向西的；adv.向西 | |
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interval
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| n.间隔，间距；幕间休息，中场休息 | |
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etiquette
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| n.礼仪，礼节；规矩 | |
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cowardice
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| n.胆小，怯懦 | |
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thumped
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| v.重击， （指心脏）急速跳动( thump的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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attic
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| n.顶楼，屋顶室 | |
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lame
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| adj.跛的，(辩解、论据等)无说服力的 | |
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embarrassment
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| n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫 | |
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frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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stony
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| adj.石头的，多石头的，冷酷的，无情的 | |
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prim
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| adj.拘泥形式的，一本正经的；n.循规蹈矩，整洁；adv.循规蹈矩地，整洁地 | |
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primitive
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| adj.原始的；简单的；n.原(始)人，原始事物 | |
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yearning
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| a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的 | |
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guise
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| n.外表，伪装的姿态 | |
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helping
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| n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的，辅助的 | |
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permissible
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| adj.可允许的，许可的 | |
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flannels
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| 法兰绒男裤； 法兰绒( flannel的名词复数 ) | |
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gentry
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| n.绅士阶级，上层阶级 | |
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referee
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| n.裁判员．仲裁人，代表人，鉴定人 | |
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chauffeur
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| n.(受雇于私人或公司的)司机；v.为…开车 | |
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bumptious
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| adj.傲慢的 | |
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condescend
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| v.俯就，屈尊；堕落，丢丑 | |
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embarrassments
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| n.尴尬( embarrassment的名词复数 )；难堪；局促不安；令人难堪或耻辱的事 | |
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apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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solicitous
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| adj.热切的，挂念的 | |
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appalling
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| adj.骇人听闻的，令人震惊的，可怕的 | |
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28
implement
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| n.(pl.)工具，器具；vt.实行，实施，执行 | |
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29
penetrate
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| v.透(渗)入；刺入，刺穿；洞察，了解 | |
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30
dyke
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| n.堤，水坝，排水沟 | |
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31
pinnacles
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| 顶峰( pinnacle的名词复数 )； 顶点； 尖顶； 小尖塔 | |
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receded
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| v.逐渐远离( recede的过去式和过去分词 )；向后倾斜；自原处后退或避开别人的注视；尤指问题 | |
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33
stumps
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| （被砍下的树的）树桩( stump的名词复数 )； 残肢； （板球三柱门的）柱； 残余部分 | |
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primordial
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| adj.原始的；最初的 | |
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elevations
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| （水平或数量）提高( elevation的名词复数 )； 高地； 海拔； 提升 | |
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dense
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| a.密集的，稠密的，浓密的；密度大的 | |
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remains
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| n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹 | |
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syllables
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| n.音节( syllable的名词复数 ) | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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40
colonists
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| n.殖民地开拓者，移民，殖民地居民( colonist的名词复数 ) | |
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relatively
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| adv.比较...地，相对地 | |
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exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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dissent
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| n./v.不同意，持异议 | |
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sedate
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| adj.沉着的，镇静的，安静的 | |
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45
applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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46
emergence
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| n.浮现，显现，出现，（植物）突出体 | |
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47
disillusion
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| vt.使不再抱幻想，使理想破灭 | |
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48
futility
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| n.无用 | |
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49
mortification
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| n.耻辱，屈辱 | |
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50
fascination
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| n.令人着迷的事物，魅力，迷恋 | |
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51
evoked
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| [医]诱发的 | |
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52
indigo
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| n.靛青，靛蓝 | |
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53
glossy
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| adj.平滑的；有光泽的 | |
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54
decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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55
maternal
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| adj.母亲的，母亲般的，母系的，母方的 | |
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56
foresight
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| n.先见之明，深谋远虑 | |
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57
browse
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| vi.随意翻阅，浏览；(牛、羊等)吃草 | |
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58
chauffeurs
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| n.受雇于人的汽车司机( chauffeur的名词复数 ) | |
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59
lighting
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| n.照明，光线的明暗，舞台灯光 | |
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60
reposeful
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| adj.平稳的，沉着的 | |
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61
serene
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| adj. 安详的，宁静的，平静的 | |
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62
tranquillity
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| n. 平静, 安静 | |
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63
ledge
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| n.壁架，架状突出物；岩架，岩礁 | |
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64
supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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65
overflowing
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| n. 溢出物,溢流 adj. 充沛的，充满的 动词overflow的现在分词形式 | |
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66
soothed
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| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
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67
softened
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| （使）变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 )； 缓解打击； 缓和； 安慰 | |
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