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Chapter 17
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In spite of this drop, if not just by reason of it, she felt as if Lady Bradeen, all but named out, had popped straight up; and she practically betrayed her consciousness by waiting a little before she rejoined: “Cleverer than who?”

“Well, if I wasn’t afraid you’d think I swagger, I should say — than anybody! If you leave your place there, where shall you go?” he more gravely asked.

“Oh too far for you ever to find me!”

“I’d find you anywhere.”

The tone of this was so still more serious that she had but her one acknowledgement. “I’d do anything for you — I’d do anything for you,” she repeated. She had already, she felt, said it all; so what did anything more, anything less, matter? That was the very reason indeed why she could, with a lighter1 note, ease him generously of any awkwardness produced by solemnity, either his own or hers. “Of course it must be nice for you to be able to think there are people all about who feel in such a way.”

In immediate2 appreciation3 of this, however, he only smoked without looking at her. “But you don’t want to give up your present work?” he at last threw out. “I mean you will stay in the post-office?”

“Oh yes; I think I’ve a genius for that.”

“Rather! No one can touch you.” With this he turned more to her again. “But you can get, with a move, greater advantages?”

“I can get in the suburbs cheaper lodgings4. I live with my mother. We need some space. There’s a particular place that has other inducements.”

He just hesitated. “Where is it?”

“Oh quite out of your way. You’d never have time.”

“But I tell you I’d go anywhere. Don’t you believe it?”

“Yes, for once or twice. But you’d soon see it wouldn’t do for you.”

He smoked and considered; seemed to stretch himself a little and, with his legs out, surrender himself comfortably. “Well, well, well — I believe everything you say. I take it from you — anything you like — in the most extraordinary way.” It struck her certainly — and almost without bitterness — that the way in which she was already, as if she had been an old friend, arranging for him and preparing the only magnificence she could muster5, was quite the most extraordinary. “Don’t, don’t go!” he presently went on. “I shall miss you too horribly!”

“So that you just put it to me as a definite request?” — oh how she tried to divest6 this of all sound of the hardness of bargaining! That ought to have been easy enough, for what was she arranging to get? Before he could answer she had continued: “To be perfectly7 fair I should tell you I recognise at Cocker’s certain strong attractions. All you people come. I like all the horrors.”

“The horrors?”

“Those you all — you know the set I mean, your set — show me with as good a conscience as if I had no more feeling than a letter-box.”

He looked quite excited at the way she put it. “Oh they don’t know!”

“Don’t know I’m not stupid? No, how should they?”

“Yes, how should they?” said the Captain sympathetically. “But isn’t ‘horrors’ rather strong?”

“What you do is rather strong!” the girl promptly8 returned.

“What I do?”

“Your extravagance, your selfishness, your immorality9, your crimes,” she pursued, without heeding10 his expression.

“I say!” — her companion showed the queerest stare.

“I like them, as I tell you — I revel11 in them. But we needn’t go into that,” she quietly went on; “for all I get out of it is the harmless pleasure of knowing. I know, I know, I know!” — she breathed it ever so gently.

“Yes; that’s what has been between us,” he answered much more simply.

She could enjoy his simplicity12 in silence, and for a moment she did so. “If I do stay because you want it — and I’m rather capable of that — there are two or three things I think you ought to remember. One is, you know, that I’m there sometimes for days and weeks together without your ever coming.”

“Oh I’ll come every day!” he honestly cried.

She was on the point, at this, of imitating with her hand his movement of shortly before; but she checked herself, and there was no want of effect in her soothing13 substitute. “How can you? How can you?” He had, too manifestly, only to look at it there, in the vulgarly animated14 gloom, to see that he couldn’t; and at this point, by the mere15 action of his silence, everything they had so definitely not named, the whole presence round which they had been circling, became part of their reference, settled in solidly between them. It was as if then for a minute they sat and saw it all in each other’s eyes, saw so much that there was no need of a pretext16 for sounding it at last. “Your danger, your danger —!” Her voice indeed trembled with it, and she could only for the moment again leave it so.

During this moment he leaned back on the bench, meeting her in silence and with a face that grew more strange. It grew so strange that after a further instant she got straight up. She stood there as if their talk were now over, and he just sat and watched her. It was as if now — owing to the third person they had brought in — they must be more careful; so that the most he could finally say was: “That’s where it is!”

“That’s where it is!” the girl as guardedly replied. He sat still, and she added: “I won’t give you up. Good-bye.”

“Good-bye?” — he appealed, but without moving.

“I don’t quite see my way, but I won’t give you up,” she repeated. “There. Good-bye.”

It brought him with a jerk to his feet, tossing away his cigarette. His poor face was flushed. “See here — see here!”

“No, I won’t; but I must leave you now,” she went on as if not hearing him.

“See here — see here!” He tried, from the bench, to take her hand again.

But that definitely settled it for her: this would, after all, be as bad as his asking her to supper. “You mustn’t come with me — no, no!”

He sank back, quite blank, as if she had pushed him. “I mayn’t see you home?”

“No, no; let me go.” He looked almost as if she had struck him, but she didn’t care; and the manner in which she spoke17 — it was literally18 as if she were angry — had the force of a command. “Stay where you are!”

“See here — see here!” he nevertheless pleaded.

“I won’t give you up!” she cried once more — this time quite with passion; on which she got away from him as fast as she could and left him staring after her.


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 lighter 5pPzPR     
n.打火机,点火器;驳船;v.用驳船运送;light的比较级
参考例句:
  • The portrait was touched up so as to make it lighter.这张画经过润色,色调明朗了一些。
  • The lighter works off the car battery.引燃器利用汽车蓄电池打火。
2 immediate aapxh     
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的
参考例句:
  • His immediate neighbours felt it their duty to call.他的近邻认为他们有责任去拜访。
  • We declared ourselves for the immediate convocation of the meeting.我们主张立即召开这个会议。
3 appreciation Pv9zs     
n.评价;欣赏;感谢;领会,理解;价格上涨
参考例句:
  • I would like to express my appreciation and thanks to you all.我想对你们所有人表达我的感激和谢意。
  • I'll be sending them a donation in appreciation of their help.我将送给他们一笔捐款以感谢他们的帮助。
4 lodgings f12f6c99e9a4f01e5e08b1197f095e6e     
n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍
参考例句:
  • When he reached his lodgings the sun had set. 他到达公寓房间时,太阳已下山了。
  • I'm on the hunt for lodgings. 我正在寻找住所。
5 muster i6czT     
v.集合,收集,鼓起,激起;n.集合,检阅,集合人员,点名册
参考例句:
  • Go and muster all the men you can find.去集合所有你能找到的人。
  • I had to muster my courage up to ask him that question.我必须鼓起勇气向他问那个问题。
6 divest 9kKzx     
v.脱去,剥除
参考例句:
  • I cannot divest myself of the idea.我无法消除那个念头。
  • He attempted to divest himself of all responsibilities for the decision.他力图摆脱掉作出该项决定的一切责任。
7 perfectly 8Mzxb     
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地
参考例句:
  • The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
  • Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。
8 promptly LRMxm     
adv.及时地,敏捷地
参考例句:
  • He paid the money back promptly.他立即还了钱。
  • She promptly seized the opportunity his absence gave her.她立即抓住了因他不在场给她创造的机会。
9 immorality 877727a0158f319a192e0d1770817c46     
n. 不道德, 无道义
参考例句:
  • All the churchmen have preached against immorality. 所有牧师都讲道反对不道德的行为。
  • Where the European sees immorality and lawlessness, strict law rules in reality. 在欧洲人视为不道德和无规则的地方,事实上都盛行着一种严格的规则。 来自英汉非文学 - 家庭、私有制和国家的起源
10 heeding e57191803bfd489e6afea326171fe444     
v.听某人的劝告,听从( heed的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • This come of heeding people who say one thing and mean another! 有些人嘴里一回事,心里又是一回事,今天这个下场都是听信了这种人的话的结果。 来自辞典例句
  • Her dwarfish spouse still smoked his cigar and drank his rum without heeding her. 她那矮老公还在吸他的雪茄,喝他的蔗酒,睬也不睬她。 来自辞典例句
11 revel yBezQ     
vi.狂欢作乐,陶醉;n.作乐,狂欢
参考例句:
  • She seems to revel in annoying her parents.她似乎以惹父母生气为乐。
  • The children revel in country life.孩子们特别喜欢乡村生活。
12 simplicity Vryyv     
n.简单,简易;朴素;直率,单纯
参考例句:
  • She dressed with elegant simplicity.她穿着朴素高雅。
  • The beauty of this plan is its simplicity.简明扼要是这个计划的一大特点。
13 soothing soothing     
adj.慰藉的;使人宽心的;镇静的
参考例句:
  • Put on some nice soothing music.播放一些柔和舒缓的音乐。
  • His casual, relaxed manner was very soothing.他随意而放松的举动让人很快便平静下来。
14 animated Cz7zMa     
adj.生气勃勃的,活跃的,愉快的
参考例句:
  • His observations gave rise to an animated and lively discussion.他的言论引起了一场气氛热烈而活跃的讨论。
  • We had an animated discussion over current events last evening.昨天晚上我们热烈地讨论时事。
15 mere rC1xE     
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过
参考例句:
  • That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
  • It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。
16 pretext 1Qsxi     
n.借口,托词
参考例句:
  • He used his headache as a pretext for not going to school.他借口头疼而不去上学。
  • He didn't attend that meeting under the pretext of sickness.他以生病为借口,没参加那个会议。
17 spoke XryyC     
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说
参考例句:
  • They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
  • The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。
18 literally 28Wzv     
adv.照字面意义,逐字地;确实
参考例句:
  • He translated the passage literally.他逐字逐句地翻译这段文字。
  • Sometimes she would not sit down till she was literally faint.有时候,她不走到真正要昏厥了,决不肯坐下来。


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