Chapter 10 Sporting Reflections

I have now told you (I presume) how I became whimsical, and I fear it would please Mary not at all. But speaking of her, and as the cat’s light keeps me in a ruminating¹ mood, suppose, instead of returning Mary to her lover by means of the letter, I had presented a certain clubman to her consideration? Certainly no such whimsical idea crossed my mind when I dropped the letter, but between you and me and my night-socks, which have all this time been airing by the fire because I am subject to cold feet, I have sometimes toyed with it since.

Why did I not think of this in time? Was it because I must ever remain true to the unattainable she?

I am reminded of a passage in the life of a sweet lady, a friend of mine, whose daughter was on the eve of marriage, when suddenly her lover died. It then became pitiful to watch that trembling old face trying to point the way of courage to the young one. In time, however, there came another youth, as true, I dare say, as the first, but not so well known to me, and I shrugged² my shoulders cynically³ to see my old friend once more a matchmaker. She took him to her heart and boasted of him; like one made young herself by the great event, she joyously⁴ dressed her pale daughter in her bridal gown, and, with smiles upon her face, she cast rice after the departing carriage. But soon after it had gone, I chanced upon her in her room, and she was on her knees in tears before the spirit of the dead lover. “Forgive me,” she besought⁵ him, “for I am old, and life is gray to friendless girls.” The pardon she wanted was for pretending to her daughter that women should act thus.

I am sure she felt herself soiled.

But men are of a coarser clay. At least I am, and nearly twenty years had elapsed, and here was I burdened under a load of affection, like a sack of returned love-letters, with no lap into which to dump them.

“They were all written to another woman, ma’am, and yet I am in hopes that you will find something in them about yourself.” It would have sounded oddly to Mary, but life is gray to friendless girls, and something might have come of it.

On the other hand, it would have brought her for ever out of the wood of the little hut, and I had but to drop the letter to send them both back there. The easiness of it tempted⁶ me.

Besides, she would tire of me when I was really known to her. They all do, you see.

And, after all, why should he lose his laugh because I had lost my smile?

And then, again, the whole thing was merely a whimsical idea.

I dropped the letter, and shouldered my burden.

1 ruminating   

v.沉思( ruminate的现在分词 )；反复考虑；反刍；倒嚼

参考例句：

• He sat there ruminating and picking at the tablecloth. 他坐在那儿沉思，轻轻地抚弄着桌布。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He is ruminating on what had happened the day before. 他在沉思前一天发生的事情。 来自《简明英汉词典》

2 shrugged   

vt.耸肩（shrug的过去式与过去分词形式）

参考例句：

• Sam shrugged and said nothing. 萨姆耸耸肩膀，什么也没说。
• She shrugged, feigning nonchalance. 她耸耸肩，装出一副无所谓的样子。 来自《简明英汉词典》

3 cynically   

adv.爱嘲笑地，冷笑地

参考例句：

• "Holding down the receiver,'said Daisy cynically. “挂上话筒在讲。”黛西冷嘲热讽地说。 来自英汉文学 - 盖茨比
• The Democrats sensibly (if cynically) set about closing the God gap. 民主党在明智（有些讽刺）的减少宗教引起的问题。 来自互联网

4 joyously   

ad.快乐地, 高兴地

参考例句：

• She opened the door for me and threw herself in my arms, screaming joyously and demanding that we decorate the tree immediately. 她打开门，直扑我的怀抱，欣喜地喊叫着要马上装饰圣诞树。
• They came running, crying out joyously in trilling girlish voices. 她们边跑边喊，那少女的颤音好不欢快。 来自名作英译部分

5 besought   

v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的过去式和过去分词 )；(beseech的过去式与过去分词)

参考例句：

• The prisoner besought the judge for mercy/to be merciful. 囚犯恳求法官宽恕[乞求宽大]。 来自辞典例句
• They besought him to speak the truth. 他们恳求他说实话. 来自辞典例句

6 tempted   

v.怂恿（某人）干不正当的事；冒…的险（tempt的过去分词）

参考例句：

• I was sorely tempted to complain, but I didn't. 我极想发牢骚，但还是没开口。
• I was tempted by the dessert menu. 甜食菜单馋得我垂涎欲滴。