THE LEARNED PIG GROWN OUT OF KNOWLEDGE.

 TO A BAD RIDER.
I.
WHY, Mr. Rider, why
Your nag¹ so ill indorse, man?
To make observers cry,
You’re mounted, but no horseman?
[Pg 352]
II.
With elbows out so far,
This thought you can’t debar me—
Though no Dragoon— Hussar—
You’re surely of the army!
III.
I hope to turn M.P.
You have not any notion,
So awkward you would be
At “seconding a motion!”
 
OUT AT ELBOWS.
MY SON AND HEIR.
I.
MY mother bids me bind² my heir,
But not the trade where I should bind;
To place a boy—the how and where—
It is the plague of parent-kind!
[Pg 353]
II.
She does not hint the slightest plan,
Nor what indentures³ to endorse⁴;
Whether to bind him to a man,—
Or, like Mazeppa, to a horse.
 
SON AND HAIR.
III.
What line to choose of likely rise,
To something in the Stocks at last,—
“Fast bind, fast find,” the proverb cries,
I find I cannot bind so fast!
IV.
A Statesman James can never be;
A Tailor?—there I only learn
His chief concern is cloth, and he
Is always cutting his concern.
[Pg 354]
V.
A Seedsman?—I’d not have him so;
A Grocer’s plum might disappoint;
A Butcher?—no, not that—although
I hear “the times are out of joint⁵!”
VI.
Too many of all trades there be,
Like Pedlars, each has such a pack,
A merchant selling coals?—we see
The buyer send to cellar back.
VII.
A Hardware dealer⁶?—that might please,
But if his trade’s foundation leans
On spikes⁷ and nails, he won’t have ease
When he retires upon his means.
VIII.
A Soldier?—there he has not nerves
A Sailor seldom lays up pelf⁸:
A Baker⁹?—no, a baker serves
His customer before himself.
IX.
Dresser of hair?—that’s not the sort;
A joiner jars with his desire—
A Churchman?—James is very short,
And cannot to a church aspire¹⁰.
X.
A Lawyer?—that’s a hardish term!
A Publisher might give him ease,
If he could into Longman’s firm
Just plunge¹¹ at once “in medias Rees.”
[Pg 355]
XI.
A shop for pot, and pan, and cup,
Such brittle¹² Stock I can’t advise;
A Builder running houses up,
Their gains are stories—may be lies!
XII.
A Coppersmith I can’t endure—
Nor petty Usher¹³ A, B, C-ing;
A Publican no father sure,
Would be the author of his being!
XIII.
A Paper-maker?—come he must
To rags before he sells a sheet—
A Miller¹⁴?—all his toil¹⁵ is just
To make a meal—he does not eat.
XIV.
A Currier?—that by favour goes—
A Chandler gives me great misgiving—
An Undertaker?—one of those
That do not hope to get their living!
XV.
Three Golden Balls?—I like them not;
An Auctioneer I never did—
The victim of a slavish lot,
Obliged to do as he is bid!
XVI.
A Broker¹⁶ watching fall and rise
Of Stock?—I’d rather deal in stone,—
A Printer?—there his toils¹⁷ comprise
Another’s work beside his own.
[Pg 356]
XVII.
A Cooper?—neither I nor Jem
Have any taste or turn for that,—
A fish retailer¹⁸?—but with him,
One part of trade is always flat.
 
THE FAMILY LIBRARY.
XVIII.
A Painter?—long he would not live,—
An Artist’s a precarious¹⁹ craft—
In trade Apothecaries²⁰ give,
But very seldom take, a draught²¹.
[Pg 357]
XIX.
A Glazier?—what if he should smash!
A Crispin he shall not be made—
A Grazier may be losing cash,
Although he drives “a roaring trade.”
XX.
Well, something must be done! to look
On all my little works around—
James is too big a boy, like book,
To leave upon the shelf unbound.
XXI.
But what to do?—my temples ache
From evening’s dew till morning’s pearl,
What course to take my boy to make—
Oh could I make my boy—a girl!
 

1 nag   

v.(对…)不停地唠叨；n.爱唠叨的人

参考例句：

• Nobody likes to work with a nag.谁也不愿与好唠叨的人一起共事。
• Don't nag me like an old woman.别像个老太婆似的唠唠叨叨烦我。

2 bind   

vt.捆，包扎；装订；约束；使凝固；vi.变硬

参考例句：

• I will let the waiter bind up the parcel for you.我让服务生帮你把包裹包起来。
• He wants a shirt that does not bind him.他要一件不使他觉得过紧的衬衫。

3 indentures   

vt.以契约束缚（indenture的第三人称单数形式）

参考例句：

• Occasionally a girl of intelligence andwould insist on the fulfilled of the terms of her indentures. 偶尔也有个把聪明、倔强的姑娘坚决要求履行合同上的规定。 来自互联网

4 endorse   

vt.(支票、汇票等)背书，背署；批注；同意

参考例句：

• No one is foolish enough to endorse it.没有哪个人会傻得赞成它。
• I fully endorse your opinions on this subject.我完全拥护你对此课题的主张。

5 joint   

adj.联合的，共同的；n.关节，接合处；v.连接，贴合

参考例句：

• I had a bad fall,which put my shoulder out of joint.我重重地摔了一跤，肩膀脫臼了。
• We wrote a letter in joint names.我们联名写了封信。

6 dealer   

n.商人，贩子

参考例句：

• The dealer spent hours bargaining for the painting.那个商人为购买那幅画花了几个小时讨价还价。
• The dealer reduced the price for cash down.这家商店对付现金的人减价优惠。

7 spikes   

n.穗( spike的名词复数 )；跑鞋；（防滑）鞋钉；尖状物v.加烈酒于( spike的第三人称单数 )；偷偷地给某人的饮料加入（更多）酒精（ 或药物）；把尖状物钉入；打乱某人的计划

参考例句：

• a row of iron spikes on a wall 墙头的一排尖铁
• There is a row of spikes on top of the prison wall to prevent the prisoners escaping. 监狱墙头装有一排尖钉，以防犯人逃跑。 来自《简明英汉词典》

8 pelf   

n.金钱；财物（轻蔑语）

参考例句：

• Let him disenslave himself from the pelf of the world.让他从金钱束缚下解放自己。
• Pelf makes friends,adversity tries them.富贵交友易, 患难显真情。

9 baker   

n.面包师

参考例句：

• The baker bakes his bread in the bakery.面包师在面包房内烤面包。
• The baker frosted the cake with a mixture of sugar and whites of eggs.面包师在蛋糕上撒了一层白糖和蛋清的混合料。

10 aspire   

vi.(to，after)渴望，追求，有志于

参考例句：

• Living together with you is what I aspire toward in my life.和你一起生活是我一生最大的愿望。
• I aspire to be an innovator not a follower.我迫切希望能变成个开创者而不是跟随者。

11 plunge   

v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲

参考例句：

• Test pool's water temperature before you plunge in.在你跳入之前你应该测试水温。
• That would plunge them in the broil of the two countries.那将会使他们陷入这两国的争斗之中。

12 brittle   

adj.易碎的；脆弱的；冷淡的；(声音)尖利的

参考例句：

• The pond was covered in a brittle layer of ice.池塘覆盖了一层易碎的冰。
• She gave a brittle laugh.她冷淡地笑了笑。

13 usher   

n.带位员，招待员；vt.引导，护送；vi.做招待，担任引座员

参考例句：

• The usher seated us in the front row.引座员让我们在前排就座。
• They were quickly ushered away.他们被迅速领开。

14 miller   

n.磨坊主

参考例句：

• Every miller draws water to his own mill.磨坊主都往自己磨里注水。
• The skilful miller killed millions of lions with his ski.技术娴熟的磨坊主用雪橇杀死了上百万头狮子。

15 toil   

vi.辛劳工作，艰难地行动；n.苦工，难事

参考例句：

• The wealth comes from the toil of the masses.财富来自大众的辛勤劳动。
• Every single grain is the result of toil.每一粒粮食都来之不易。

16 broker   

n.中间人，经纪人；v.作为中间人来安排

参考例句：

• He baited the broker by promises of higher commissions.他答应给更高的佣金来引诱那位经纪人。
• I'm a real estate broker.我是不动产经纪人。

17 toils   

网

参考例句：

• It did not declare him to be still in Mrs. Dorset's toils. 这并不表明他仍陷于多赛特夫人的情网。
• The thief was caught in the toils of law. 这个贼陷入了法网。

18 retailer   

n.零售商(人)

参考例句：

• What are the retailer requirements?零售商会有哪些要求呢？
• The retailer has assembled a team in Shanghai to examine the question.这家零售商在上海组建了一支团队研究这个问题。

19 precarious   

adj.不安定的，靠不住的；根据不足的

参考例句：

• Our financial situation had become precarious.我们的财务状况已变得不稳定了。
• He earned a precarious living as an artist.作为一个艺术家，他过得是朝不保夕的生活。

20 apothecaries   

n.药剂师，药店( apothecary的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Some of them crawl through the examination of the Apothecaries Hall. 有些人则勉勉强强通过了药剂师公会的考试。 来自辞典例句
• Apothecaries would not sugar their pills unless they were bitter. 好药不苦不会加糖衣。 来自互联网

21 draught   

n.拉，牵引，拖；一网（饮，吸，阵)；顿服药量，通风；v.起草，设计

参考例句：

• He emptied his glass at one draught.他将杯中物一饮而尽。
• It's a pity the room has no north window and you don't get a draught.可惜这房间没北窗，没有过堂风。