“Oh, thad’s a log story,” said A. Fish, Esq., and proceeded to tell us how that after we had escaped from Why, by means of the shute, there had been a great commotion2 in the place, and the Doctor-in-Law was furious. He declared that we should not slip through his hands in this way, and had a long conversation with the Sister-in-Law and the others as to the best way of affecting our capture. Finally they decided3 to attach themselves to a long rope, and come down the shute in pursuit of us.
A. Fish, Esq., made the excuse that his cold was too bad to permit him to join the party, and waited till they had got a good way down, and then cut the rope. He thought that this would be the best way of being of service to us. And so it was, of course, for goodness only knows where our pursuers were by this time.
A little while after he had cut the rope A. Fish, Esq., came across the Crow, who told him that he had been informed by two duffer birds (which was the name of the curious blue birds which we had noticed) that we were here at Wer-har-wei, and had immediately set about to discover the best way to get here.
He went in the first place to the station-master at Why, and found him, as usual, engaged in squabbling with the porter.
They were arguing as to whether a certain signal should be up or down.
The station-master declared that the signal should always be up on the up line and down on the down line. This the porter would not agree to, so it was at last decided to put one up and one down and leave them so, and then the engine-drivers could do as they pleased about going on or stopping.
When they had quite settled this dispute, A. Fish, Esq., had asked them if there were any trains running between Why and this place, and at first they had said no; but presently the porter remembered that there was a certain train which started on some days and went no one knew where.
No one was ever known to travel by it, and the engine-driver, who was an old salamander by the name of Mike, was deaf and dumb, and could neither read nor write, so that they had never been able to find out from him where his train went to. It had some letters on it which corresponded with those on the station-master’s collar, but no one had ever been able to discover what they meant. They were popularly supposed to stand for Weary Waiting and Horribly Wobbly Railway, the initials on the station-master’s collar being W.W.H.W.R., but A. Fish, Esq., had by a brilliant inspiration come to the conclusion that they stood for Why and Wer-har-wei Railway, and when the train, which consisted of only one carriage and the engine, came into the station, he jumped in, to the intense surprise of Mike, who had never had a passenger before, and who in his agitation4 recklessly put two shovelfuls of coal into the furnace, and, giving a frantic5 “toot” on the whistle, started off at full speed.
“It was a dreadful journey,” said A. Fish, Esq., “ad I dever had so bedy ups and dowds id all by life.”
We didn’t quite understand what he meant by this at the moment, but a little later on we discovered the reason to our cost.
After an eventful journey, A. Fish, Esq., had arrived at this place, and had found on alighting from the train that no one was to be seen, and he was just about to kick at the door of Ho-Lor’s house when Kis-Smee came bounding out. Poor A. Fish, Esq., had been terribly alarmed, and had made for the nearest tree, and was vainly trying to climb up into it when we made our appearance.
“If I were you,” he advised, “I should certaidly cub6 back to Why at odce, for the people all seeb to be rejoiced thad Madame and the Doctor-id-Law have gode away, ad I think thad they would willingly forgive you for having said, ‘Ad horse! ad horse! by kigdob for ad horse!’”
After talking the matter over for a few minutes we decided that perhaps it would be the best thing to do, and as the little blue station was only just at the back of Ho-Lor’s house we thought that perhaps by hurrying we should catch the same train back to Why by which A. Fish, Esq., had come. So we set out to try and find the little blue people, to bid them “good-by,” and thank them for their hospitality.
We found them at the station sitting beside Mike, to whom it appeared they were in the habit of being very kind on his occasional visits.
They seemed quite sorry to hear that we were leaving them so soon, and insisted upon making the Wallypug a present of Kis-Smee, and of stuffing into my pocket an enormous gombobble as a souvenir of my visit. Then there was just time to look at the “train” before we started. I must say that of all crazy, ramshackle affairs it was quite the worst that I had ever seen. To begin with, the wheels were all sorts of shapes, and not one of them was quite round. There was only one compartment7, and that had no windows in it. And the engine! Well, it was something like Puffing8 Billy, only a little worse.
There was no room for Kis-Smee in the carriage, so we were obliged to chain him up on the roof, evidently much to his disgust.
I must confess to a certain feeling of uneasiness when, having taken our seats, the engine gave a snort, and puffing out a volume of dense9 black smoke and smuts, started us on our journey.
By reason of the odd shape of our wheels and the unevenness10 of the rails the carriage pitched and tossed about like a ship at sea, and our passage over a little wooden viaduct, where on either side the little blue people stood waving their adieux with quaint11 little flags, was, I am convinced, attended with considerable danger.
It was really a dreadful journey. The carriage pitched backward and forward, and rolled from side to side with every revolution of the wheels, while poor Kis-Smee, on the top, kept slipping about in the most painful manner. His Majesty’s carpet-bag, which had not been securely fastened to the top of the carriage, slipped off soon after we started, and though we rang the bell violently Mike refused to stop, and it was lost forever.
“Fortunately there was not much in it!” his Majesty gasped12 between the jerks which the irregular motion of the train occasioned. “Only a tooth-brush and small cake of soap.”
“But it felt quite full,” I remarked in surprise.
“Yes,” explained his Majesty. “I stuffed it full of paper and things, because I thought that it would look so bad for a king to be traveling about without any luggage.”
Just then there was a yelp13 and a howl from Kis-Smee, and looking out of the window we found that the poor creature had fallen from the roof and was hanging down by the chain which was attached to the top of the carriage, and was in momentary14 danger of being strangled.
We managed, after a prolonged struggle, to haul him in through the window, and, although we were rather crowded, to find room for him in the carriage. We had hardly settled down into our places, however, before the train came to a standstill, and Mike came to the door in a great state of agitation.
“Av yez plaze, sor,” he began.
“Why! I thought you were deaf and dumb,” I cried.
“Och—that’s all gammon sure—oi can talk all roight, and hear all roight too when it suits me purpose. Well, now, ye see when the dog fell off the roof he upset me coal-scuttle15, and never a bit of coal is there left. Would ye be good enough, kind gentlemen, to go back and pick some up off the line, it’s only about a moile and a half back.”
The engine, it appeared, could not be reversed, and, as there was no chance of getting a supply anywhere else, nothing remained but for his Majesty and myself to go back with the coal-scuttle and pick some of the spilt coal up.
Kis-Smee bounded delightedly at our side; but we did not take A. Fish, Esq., with us, as he complained of a pain in his tail, and we feared that the long walk might make it worse.
“I shall amuse byself while you are away by giving Bike ad elocutiod lessod,” he said, as we left him.
But Mike, who was undoing16 his bundle preparatory to having some dinner, did not look very enthusiastic over the project, and I am almost certain I heard him mutter, “Not if I know it,” as we were walking away.
We found the coal, as we expected, beside the line, after we had walked a little over a mile, and his Majesty and myself picked it up, and packing it in the scuttle, took turns in carrying it back to the train again.
We had nearly arrived at the spot where the train was waiting for us, when his Majesty noticed some curious flowers growing in a little copse beside the line, and we put down our coal-scuttle and went to gather them. While we were doing so, however, we heard a wild shout, and looking up beheld17 an enormously tall and thin man running towards us, gesticulating violently.
“Where’s his muzzle18?” he demanded, pointing to Kis-Smee. “Can’t you see the dog is mad and must be muzzled20 immediately?”
“I’m sure he’s not,” cried the Wallypug, indignantly, and patting Kis-Smee’s head.
“He is,” declared the man. “All dogs are mad, and I insist upon them being muzzled.”
“Very well,” I interposed. “You had better try and put a muzzle on this one yourself.”
“Oh! I’ll soon do that,” cried the man, selecting a large muzzle from the collection which he carried with him. “Come here, sir! Good dog, then.”
Kis-Smee growled21, and grinning more than ever made a dart22 at the man, who dropped his muzzles and fled, screaming, “Mad dog! Mad dog!” at the top of his voice.
His Majesty and myself, laughing heartily23 at his discomfiture24, hurried back to the train without meeting with any further adventures.
A. Fish, Esq., and Mike seemed to be rather cool towards each other, I thought, and I heard afterwards that they had not got on at all well with the “elocution” lesson—in fact, Mike had absolutely refused to be instructed in that very necessary art.
Of course we told them of our adventure with the man in the wood, and Mike explained that he was well known as “The Long Man of Muzzledom,” and was quite harmless, though rather silly, being under the impression that all dogs and cats were mad and should be muzzled.
“Well, he didn’t muzzle Kis-Smee, anyhow,” said his Majesty, as we took our seats in the carriage, and the train once more started for Why.
After several hours of bumping and jolting25, we were delighted to see the familiar towers and gables of his Majesty’s palace in the distance, and knew that we had at last arrived at the end of our journey.
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1
majesty
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| n.雄伟，壮丽，庄严，威严；最高权威，王权 | |
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2
commotion
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| n.骚动，动乱 | |
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decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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agitation
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| n.搅动；搅拌；鼓动，煽动 | |
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frantic
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| adj.狂乱的，错乱的，激昂的 | |
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cub
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| n.幼兽，年轻无经验的人 | |
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7
compartment
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| n.卧车包房，隔间；分隔的空间 | |
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puffing
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| v.使喷出( puff的现在分词 )；喷着汽（或烟）移动；吹嘘；吹捧 | |
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dense
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| a.密集的，稠密的，浓密的；密度大的 | |
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10
unevenness
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| n. 不平坦，不平衡，不匀性 | |
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quaint
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| adj.古雅的，离奇有趣的，奇怪的 | |
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gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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yelp
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| vi.狗吠 | |
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momentary
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| adj.片刻的，瞬息的；短暂的 | |
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15
scuttle
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| v.急赶，疾走，逃避；n.天窗；舷窗 | |
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16
undoing
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| n.毁灭的原因，祸根；破坏，毁灭 | |
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17
beheld
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| v.看，注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 )；瞧；看呀；（叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现）哎哟 | |
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18
muzzle
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| n.鼻口部；口套；枪(炮)口；vt.使缄默 | |
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muzzles
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| 枪口( muzzle的名词复数 )； （防止动物咬人的）口套； （四足动物的）鼻口部； （狗）等凸出的鼻子和口 | |
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muzzled
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| 给（狗等）戴口套( muzzle的过去式和过去分词 )； 使缄默，钳制…言论 | |
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21
growled
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| v.（动物）发狺狺声， （雷）作隆隆声( growl的过去式和过去分词 )；低声咆哮着说 | |
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22
dart
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| v.猛冲，投掷；n.飞镖，猛冲 | |
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23
heartily
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| adv.衷心地，诚恳地，十分，很 | |
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24
discomfiture
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| n.崩溃；大败；挫败；困惑 | |
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jolting
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| adj.令人震惊的 | |
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