'Stein was the man who knew more about Patusan than anybody else. More than was known in the government circles I suspect. I have no doubt he had been there, either in his butterfly-hunting days or later on, when he tried in his incorrigible10 way to season with a pinch of romance the fattening11 dishes of his commercial kitchen. There were very few places in the Archipelago he had not seen in the original dusk of their being, before light (and even electric light) had been carried into them for the sake of better morality and -and -- well -- the greater profit too. It was at breakfast of the morning following our talk about Jim that he mentioned the place, after I had quoted poor Brierly's remark: "Let him creep twenty feet underground and stay there." He looked up at me with interested attention, as though I had been a rare insect. "This could be done too," he remarked, sipping12 his coffee. "Bury him in some sort," I explained. "One doesn't like to do it of course, but it would be the best thing, seeing what he is." "Yes; he is young," Stein mused13. "The youngest human being now in existence," I affirmed. "Schon. There's Patusan," he went on in the same tone.... "And the woman is dead now," he added incomprehensibly.
'Of course I don't know that story; I can only guess that once before Patusan had been used as a grave for some sin, transgression14, or misfortune. It is impossible to suspect Stein. The only woman that had ever existed for him was the Malay girl he called "My wife the princess," or, more rarely, in moments of expansion, "the mother of my Emma." Who was the woman he had mentioned in connection with Patusan I can't say; but from his allusions15 I understand she had been an educated and very good-looking DutchMalay girl, with a tragic16 or perhaps only a pitiful history, whose most painful part no doubt was her marriage with a Malacca Portuguese17 who had been clerk in some commercial house in the Dutch colonies. I gathered from Stein that this man was an unsatisfactory person in more ways than one, all being more or less indefinite and offensive. It was solely18 for his wife's sake that Stein had appointed him manager of Stein & Co.'s trading post in Patusan; but commercially the arrangement was not a success, at any rate for the firm, and now the woman had died, Stein was disposed to try another agent there. The Portuguese, whose name was Cornelius, considered himself a very deserving but ill-used person, entitled by his abilities to a better position. This man Jim would have to relieve. "But I don't think he will go away from the place," remarked Stein. "That has nothing to do with me. It was only for the sake of the woman that I . . . But as I think there is a daughter left, I shall let him, if he likes to stay, keep the old house."
'Patusan is a remote district of a native-ruled state, and the chief settlement bears the same name. At a point on the river about forty miles from the sea, where the first houses come into view, there can be seen rising above the level of the forests the summits of two steep hills very close together, and separated by what looks like a deep fissure19, the cleavage of some mighty20 stroke. As a matter of fact, the valley between is nothing but a narrow ravine; the appearance from the settlement is of one irregularly conical hill split in two, and with the two halves leaning slightly apart. On the third day after the full, the moon, as seen from the open space in front of Jim's house (he had a very fine house in the native style when I visited him), rose exactly behind these hills, its diffused21 light at first throwing the two masses into intensely black relief, and then the nearly perfect disc, glowing ruddily, appeared, gliding22 upwards23 between the sides of the chasm24, till it floated away above the summits, as if escaping from a yawning grave in gentle triumph. "Wonderful effect," said Jim by my side. "Worth seeing. Is it not?"
'And this question was put with a note of personal pride that made me smile, as though he had had a hand in regulating that unique spectacle. He had regulated so many things in Patusan -things that would have appeared as much beyond his control as the motions of the moon and the stars.
'It was inconceivable. That was the distinctive25 quality of the part into which Stein and I had tumbled him unwittingly, with no other notion than to get him out of the way; out of his own way, be it understood. That was our main purpose, though, I own, I might have had another motive26 which had influenced me a little. I was about to go home for a time; and it may be I desired, more than I was aware of myself, to dispose of him -- to dispose of him, you understand -- before I left. I was going home, and he had come to me from there, with his miserable27 trouble and his shadowy claim, like a man panting under a burden in a mist. I cannot say I had ever seen him distinctly -- not even to this day, after I had my last view of him; but it seemed to me that the less I understood the more I was bound to him in the name of that doubt which is the inseparable part of our knowledge. I did not know so much more about myself. And then, I repeat, I was going home -- to that home distant enough for all its hearthstones to be like one hearthstone, by which the humblest of us has the right to sit. We wander in our thousands over the face of the earth, the illustrious and the obscure, earning beyond the seas our fame, our money, or only a crust of bread; but it seems to me that for each of us going home must be like going to render an account. We return to face our superiors, our kindred, our friends -- those whom we obey, and those whom we love; but even they who have neither, the most free, lonely, irresponsible and bereft29 of ties, -- even those for whom home holds no dear face, no familiar voice, -- even they have to meet the spirit that dwells within the land, under its sky, in its air, in its valleys, and on its rises, in its fields, in its waters and its trees -- a mute friend, judge, and inspirer. Say what you like, to get its joy, to breathe its peace, to face its truth, one must return with a clear conscience. All this may seem to you sheer sentimentalism; and indeed very few of us have the will or the capacity to look
consciously under the surface of familiar emotions. There are the girls we love, the men we look up to, the tenderness, the friendships, the opportunities, the pleasures! But the fact remains30 that you must touch your reward with clean hands, lest it turn to dead leaves, to thorns, in your grasp. I think it is the lonely, without a fireside or an affection they may call their own, those who return not to a dwelling31 but to the land itself, to meet its disembodied, eternal, and unchangeable spirit -- it is those who understand best its severity, its saving power, the grace of its secular32 right to our fidelity33, to our obedience34. Yes! few of us understand, but we all feel it though, and I say all without exception, because those who do not feel do not count. Each blade of grass has its spot on earth whence it draws its life, its strength; and so is man rooted to the land from which he draws his faith together with his life. I don't know how much Jim understood; but I know he felt, he felt confusedly but powerfully, the demand of some such truth or some such illusion -- I don't care how you call it, there is so little difference, and the difference means so little. The thing is that in virtue35 of his feeling he mattered. He would never go home now. Not he. Never. Had he been capable of picturesque36 manifestations37 he would have shuddered38 at the thought and made you shudder39 too. But he was not of that sort, though he was expressive40 enough in his way. Before the idea of going home he would grow desperately41 stiff and immovable, with lowered chin and pouted42 lips, and with those candid43 blue eyes of his glowering44 darkly under a frown, as if before something unbearable45, as if before something revolting. There was imagination in that hard skull46 of his, over which the thick clustering hair fitted like a cap. As to me, I have no imagination (I would be more certain about him today, if I had), and I do not mean to imply that I figured to myself the spirit of the land uprising above the white cliffs of Dover, to ask me what I -retur
ning with no bones broken, so to speak -- had done with my very young brother. I could not make such a mistake. I knew very well he was of those about whom there is no inquiry47; I had seen better men go out, disappear, vanish utterly48, without provoking a sound of curiosity or sorrow. The spirit of the land, as becomes the ruler of great enterprises, is careless of innumerable lives. Woe49 to the stragglers! We exist only in so far as we hang together. He had straggled in a way; he had not hung on; but he was aware of it with an intensity50 that made him touching51, just as a man's more intense life makes his death more touching than the death of a tree. I happened to be handy, and I happened to be touched. That's all there is to it. I was concerned as to the way he would go out. It would have hurt me if, for instance, he had taken to drink. The earth is so small that I was afraid of, some day, being waylaid52 by a bleareyed, swollen-faced, besmirched53 loafer, with no soles to his canvas shoes, and with a flutter of rags about the elbows, who, on the strength of old acquaintance, would ask for a loan of five dollars. You know the awful jaunty54 bearing of these scarecrows coming to you from a decent past, the rasping careless voice, the half-averted impudent55 glances -- those meetings more trying to a man who believes in the solidarity56 of our lives than the sight of an impenitent57 death-bed to a priest. That, to tell you the truth, was the only danger I could see for him and for me; but I also mistrusted my want of imagination. It might even come to something worse, in some way it was beyond my powers of fancy to foresee. He wouldn't let me forget how imaginative he was, and your imaginative people swing farther in any direction, as if given a longer scope of cable in the uneasy anchorage of life. They do. They take to drink too. It may be I was belittling58 him by such a fear. How could I tell? Even Stein could say no more than that he was romantic. I only knew he was one of us. And what business had he to be romantic? I am tel
ling you so much about my own instinctive59 feelings and bemused reflections because there remains so little to be told of him. He existed for me, and after all it is only through me that he exists for you. I've led him out by the hand; I have paraded him before you. Were my commonplace fears unjust? I won't say -- not even now. You may be able to tell better, since the proverb has it that the onlookers60 see most of the game. At any rate, they were superfluous61. He did not go out, not at all; on the contrary, he came on wonderfully, came on straight as a die and in excellent form, which showed that he could stay as well as spurt62. I ought to be delighted, for it is a victory in which I had taken my part; but I am not so pleased as I would have expected to be. I ask myself whether his rush had really carried him out of that mist in which he loomed63 interesting if not very big, with floating outlines -- a straggler yearning64 inconsolably for his humble28 place in the ranks. And besides, the last word is not said -- probably shall never be said. Are not our lives too short for that full utterance65 which through all our stammerings is of course our only and abiding66 intention? I have given up expecting those last words, whose ring, if they could only be pronounced, would shake both heaven and earth. There is never time to say our last word -- the last word of our love, of our desire, faith, remorse67, submission68, revolt. The heaven and the earth must not be shaken, I suppose -- at least, not by us who know so many truths about either. My last words about lim shall be few. I affirm he had achieved greatness; but the thing would be dwarfed69 in the telling, or rather in the hearing. Frankly70, it is not my words that I mistrust, but your minds. I could be eloquent71 were I not afraid you fellows had starved your imaginations to feed your bodies. I do not mean to be offensive; it is respectable to have no illusions -- and safe -- and profitable -- and dull. Yet you too in your time must have known the intensity of life, that light of gla
mour created in the shock of trifles, as amazing as the glow of sparks struck from a cold stone -and as short-lived, alas72!'
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1
lighting
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| n.照明，光线的明暗，舞台灯光 | |
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2
astronomer
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| n.天文学家 | |
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astronomers
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| n.天文学者，天文学家( astronomer的名词复数 ) | |
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aberrations
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| n.偏差( aberration的名词复数 )；差错；脱离常规；心理失常 | |
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emoluments
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| n.报酬，薪水( emolument的名词复数 ) | |
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unfamiliar
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| adj.陌生的，不熟悉的 | |
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faculty
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| n.才能；学院，系；(学院或系的)全体教学人员 | |
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8
entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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9
remarkable
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| adj.显著的，异常的，非凡的，值得注意的 | |
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incorrigible
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| adj.难以纠正的，屡教不改的 | |
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11
fattening
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| adj.（食物）要使人发胖的v.喂肥( fatten的现在分词 )；养肥（牲畜）；使（钱）增多；使（公司）升值 | |
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12
sipping
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| v.小口喝，呷，抿( sip的现在分词 ) | |
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mused
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| v.沉思，冥想( muse的过去式和过去分词 )；沉思自语说（某事） | |
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transgression
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| n.违背；犯规；罪过 | |
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allusions
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| 暗指，间接提到( allusion的名词复数 ) | |
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tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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Portuguese
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| n.葡萄牙人；葡萄牙语 | |
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solely
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| adv.仅仅，唯一地 | |
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fissure
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| n.裂缝；裂伤 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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diffused
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| 散布的，普及的，扩散的 | |
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gliding
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| v. 滑翔 adj. 滑动的 | |
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upwards
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| adv.向上，在更高处...以上 | |
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chasm
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| n.深坑，断层，裂口，大分岐，利害冲突 | |
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distinctive
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| adj.特别的，有特色的，与众不同的 | |
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motive
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| n.动机，目的；adv.发动的，运动的 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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29
bereft
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| adj.被剥夺的 | |
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remains
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| n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹 | |
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dwelling
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| n.住宅，住所，寓所 | |
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secular
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| n.牧师，凡人；adj.世俗的，现世的，不朽的 | |
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33
fidelity
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| n.忠诚，忠实；精确 | |
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obedience
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| n.服从，顺从 | |
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35
virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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picturesque
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| adj.美丽如画的，（语言）生动的，绘声绘色的 | |
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manifestations
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| n.表示，显示（manifestation的复数形式） | |
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38
shuddered
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| v.战栗( shudder的过去式和过去分词 )；发抖；（机器、车辆等）突然震动；颤动 | |
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shudder
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| v.战粟，震动，剧烈地摇晃；n.战粟，抖动 | |
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40
expressive
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| adj.表现的，表达…的，富于表情的 | |
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41
desperately
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| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
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42
pouted
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| v.撅（嘴）( pout的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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43
candid
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| adj.公正的，正直的；坦率的 | |
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44
glowering
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| v.怒视( glower的现在分词 ) | |
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45
unbearable
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| adj.不能容忍的；忍受不住的 | |
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46
skull
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| n.头骨；颅骨 | |
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47
inquiry
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| n.打听，询问，调查，查问 | |
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48
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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49
woe
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| n.悲哀，苦痛，不幸，困难；int.用来表达悲伤或惊慌 | |
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50
intensity
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| n.强烈，剧烈；强度；烈度 | |
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51
touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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52
waylaid
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| v.拦截，拦路( waylay的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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53
besmirched
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| v.弄脏( besmirch的过去式和过去分词 )；玷污；丑化；糟蹋（名誉等） | |
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54
jaunty
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| adj．愉快的，满足的；adv.心满意足地，洋洋得意地；n.心满意足；洋洋得意 | |
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55
impudent
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| adj.鲁莽的，卑鄙的，厚颜无耻的 | |
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56
solidarity
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| n.团结；休戚相关 | |
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57
impenitent
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| adj.不悔悟的，顽固的 | |
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58
belittling
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| 使显得微小，轻视，贬低( belittle的现在分词 ) | |
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59
instinctive
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| adj.(出于)本能的；直觉的；(出于)天性的 | |
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60
onlookers
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| n.旁观者，观看者( onlooker的名词复数 ) | |
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61
superfluous
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| adj.过多的，过剩的，多余的 | |
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62
spurt
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| v.喷出；突然进发；突然兴隆 | |
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63
loomed
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| v.隐约出现，阴森地逼近( loom的过去式和过去分词 )；隐约出现，阴森地逼近 | |
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64
yearning
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| a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的 | |
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65
utterance
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| n.用言语表达，话语，言语 | |
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66
abiding
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| adj.永久的，持久的，不变的 | |
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67
remorse
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| n.痛恨，悔恨，自责 | |
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68
submission
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| n.服从，投降；温顺，谦虚；提出 | |
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69
dwarfed
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| vt.（使）显得矮小（dwarf的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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70
frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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71
eloquent
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| adj.雄辩的，口才流利的；明白显示出的 | |
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72
alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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