15. The Story of the King's Lettuce

Don Alfonso: "Eccovi il medico, signore belle¹."Ferrando and Guglielmo: "Despina in maschera, che triste pelle!"Lorenzo da Ponte, Così fan Tutte"They say that there was a time when El-ahrairah and his followers² lost alltheir luck. Their enemies drove them out and they were forced to live down in themarshes of Kelfazin. Now, where the marshes⁴ of Kelfazin may be I do not know,but at the time when El-ahrairah and his followers were living there, of all thedreary places in the world they were the dreariest⁵. There was no food but coarsegrass and even the grass was mixed with bitter rushes and docks. The ground wastoo wet for digging: the water stood in any hole that was made. But all the otheranimals had grown so suspicious of El-ahrairah and his tricks that they would notlet him out of that wretched country and every day Prince Rainbow used to comewalking through the marshes to make sure that El-ahrairah was still there. PrinceRainbow had the power of the sky and the power of the hills and Frith had toldhim to order the world as he thought best.
"One day, when Prince Rainbow was coming through the marshes, El-ahrairahwent up to him and said, 'Prince Rainbow, my people are cold and cannot getunderground because of the wet. Their food is so dull and poor that they will be illwhen the bad weather comes. Why do you keep us here against our will? We dono harm.'
"'El-ahrairah,' replied Prince Rainbow, 'all the animals know that you are athief and a trickster. Now your tricks have caught up with you and you have tolive here until you can persuade us that you will be an honest rabbit.'
"'Then we shall never get out,' said El-ahrairah, 'for I would be ashamed to tellmy people to stop living on their wits. Will you let us out if I can swim across alake full of pike?'
"'No,' said Prince Rainbow, 'for I have heard of that trick of yours, El-ahrairah,and I know how it is done.'
"'Will you let us go if I can steal the lettuces⁶ from King Darzin's garden?' askedEl-ahrairah.
"Now, King Darzin ruled over the biggest and richest of the animal cities in theworld at that time. His soldiers were very fierce and his lettuce⁷ garden wassurrounded by a deep ditch and guarded by a thousand sentries⁸ day and night. Itwas near his palace, on the edge of the city where all his followers lived. So whenEl-ahrairah talked of stealing King Darzin's lettuces, Prince Rainbow laughed andsaid,"'You can try, El-ahrairah, and if you succeed I will multiply your peopleeverywhere and no one will be able to keep them out of a vegetable garden fromnow till the end of the world. But what will really happen is that you will be killedby the soldiers and the world will be rid of a smooth, plausible⁹ rascal¹⁰.'
"'Very well,' said El-ahrairah. 'We shall see.'
"Now, Yona the hedgehog was nearby, looking for slugs and snails¹¹ in themarshes, and he heard what passed between Prince Rainbow and El-ahrairah. Heslipped away to the great palace of King Darzin and begged to be rewarded forwarning him against his enemies.
"'King Darzin,' he sniffled, 'that wicked thief El-ahrairah has said he will stealyour lettuces and he is coming to trick you and get into the garden.'
"King Darzin hurried down to the lettuce garden and sent for the captain of theguard.
"'You see these lettuces?' he said. 'Not one of them has been stolen since theseed was sown. Very soon now they will be ready and then I mean to hold a greatfeast for all my people. But I have heard that that scoundrel Eh-ahrairah means tocome and steal them if he can. You are to double the guards; and all the gardenersand weeders are to be examined every day. Not one leaf is to go out of the gardenuntil either I or my chief taster gives the order.'
"The captain of the guard did as he was told. That night El-ahrairah came outof the marshes of Kelfazin and went secretly up to the great ditch. With him washis trusty Captain of Owsla, Rabscuttle. They squatted¹² in the bushes and watchedthe doubled guards patrolling up and down. When the morning came they saw allthe gardeners and weeders coming up to the wall and every one was looked at bythree guards. One was new and had come instead of his uncle who was ill, but theguards would not let him in because they did not know him by sight and theynearly threw him into the ditch before they would even let him go home. El-ahrairah and Rabscuttle came away in perplexity and that day, when PrinceRainbow came walking through the fields, he said, 'Well, well, Prince with theThousand Enemies, where are the lettuces?'
"'I am having them delivered,' answered El-ahrairah. 'There will be rather toomany to carry.' Then he and Rabscuttle went secretly down one of their few holeswhere there was no water, put a sentry¹³ outside and thought and talked for a dayand a night.
"On the top of the hill near King Darzin's palace there was a garden and herehis many children and his chief followers' children used to be taken to play bytheir mothers and nursemaids. There was no wall round the garden. It wasguarded only when the children were there; at night it was empty, because therewas nothing to steal and no one to be hunted. The next night Rabscuttle, who hadbeen told by El-ahrairah what he had to do, went to the garden and dug a scrape.
He hid in the scrape all night; and the next morning, when the children werebrought to play, he slipped out and joined them. There were so many childrenthat each one of the mothers and nursemaids thought that he must belong tosomebody else, but as he was about the same size as the children and not muchdifferent to look at, he was able to make friends with some of them. Rabscuttlewas full of tricks and games and quite soon he was running and playing just as ifhe had been one of the children himself. When the time came for the children togo home, Rabscuttle went, too. They came up to the gate of the city and theguards saw Rabscuttle with King Darzin's son. They stopped him and asked whichwas his mother, but the King's son said, 'You let him alone. He's my friend,' andRabscuttle went in with all the others.
"Now, as soon as Rabscuttle got inside the King's palace, he scurried¹⁴ off andwent into one of the dark burrows¹⁵; and here he hid all day. But in the evening hecame out and made his way to the royal storerooms, where the food was being gotready for the King and his chief followers and wives. There were grasses andfruits and roots and even nuts and berries, for King Darzin's people wenteverywhere in those days, through the woods and fields. There were no soldiers inthe storerooms and Rabscuttle hid there in the dark. And he did all he could tomake the food bad, except what he ate himself.
"That evening King Darzin sent for the chief taster and asked him whether thelettuces were ready. The chief taster said that several of them were excellent andthat he had already had some brought into the stores.
"'Good,' said the King. 'We will have two or three tonight.'
"But the next morning the King and several of his people were taken ill withbad stomachs. Whatever they ate, they kept on getting ill, because Rabscuttle washiding in the storerooms and spoiling the food as fast as it was brought in. TheKing ate several more lettuces, but he got no better. In fact, he got worse.
"After five days Rabscuttle slipped out again with the children and came backto El-ahrairah. When he heard that the King was ill and that Rabscuttle had doneall he wanted, El-ahrairah set to work to disguise himself. He clipped his whitetail and made Rabscuttle nibble¹⁶ his fur short and stain it with mud andblackberries. Then he covered himself all over with trailing strands¹⁷ of goose grassand big burdocks and he even found ways to alter his smell. At last even his ownwives could not recognize him, and El-ahrairah told Rabscuttle to follow someway behind and off he went to King Darzin's palace. But Rabscuttle waitedoutside, on the top of the hill.
"When he got to the palace, El-ahrairah demanded to see the captain of theguard. 'You are to take me to the King,' he said. 'Prince Rainbow has sent me. Hehas heard that the King is ill and he has sent for me, from the distant land beyondKelfazin, to find the cause of his sickness. Be quick! I am not accustomed to bekept waiting.'
"'How do I know this is true?' asked the captain of the guard.
"'It is all one to me,' replied El-ahrairah. 'What is the sickness of a little king tothe chief physician of the land beyond the golden river of Frith? I will return andtell Prince Rainbow that the King's guard were foolish and gave me suchtreatment as one might expect from a crowd of flea-bitten louts.'
"He turned and began to go away, but the captain of the guard becamefrightened and called him back. El-ahrairah allowed himself to be persuaded andthe soldiers took him to the King.
"After five days of bad food and bad stomach, the King was not inclined to besuspicious of someone who said that Prince Rainbow had sent him to make himbetter. He begged El-ahrairah to examine him and promised to do all he said.
"El-ahrairah made a great business of examining the King. He looked at hiseyes and his ears and his teeth and his droppings and the ends of his claws and heinquired what he had been eating. Then he demanded to see the royal storeroomsand the lettuce garden. When he came back he looked very grave and said, 'GreatKing, I know well what sorry news it will be to you, but the cause of your sicknessis those very lettuces by which you set such store.'
"'The lettuces?' cried King Darzin. 'Impossible! They are all grown from good,healthy seed and guarded day and night.'
"'Alas¹⁸!' said Eh-ahrairah. 'I know it well! But they have been infected by thedreaded Lousepedoodle, that flies in ever decreasing circles through the Gunpatof the Cludge -- a deadly virus -- dear me, yes! -- isolated²⁰ by the purple Avvagoand maturing in the gray-green forests of the Okey Pokey. This, you understand,is to put the matter for you in simple terms, insofar as I can. Medically speaking,there are certain complexities²¹ with which I will not weary you.'
"'I cannot believe it,' said the King.
"'The simplest course,' said El-ahrairah, 'will be to prove it to you. But we neednot make one of your subjects ill. Tell the soldiers to go out and take a prisoner.'
"The soldiers went out and the first creature they found was Rabscuttle,grazing on the hilltop. They dragged him through the gates and into the King'spresence.
"'Ah, a rabbit,' said El-ahrairah. 'Nasty creature! So much the better.
Disgusting rabbit, eat that lettuce!'
"Rabscuttle did so and soon afterward²² he began to moan and thrash about. Hekicked in convulsions and rolled his eyes. He gnawed²³ at the floor and frothed atthe mouth.
"'He is very ill,' said El-ahrairah. 'He must have got an exceptionally bad one.
Or else, which is more probable, the infection is particularly deadly to rabbits.
But, in any event, let us be thankful it was not Your Majesty²⁴. Well, he has servedour purpose. Throw him out! I would strongly advise Your Majesty,' went on El-ahrairah, 'not to leave the lettuces where they are, for they will shoot and flowerand seed. The infection will spread. I know it is disappointing, but you must getrid of them.'
"At that moment, as luck would have it, in came the captain of the guard, withYona the hedgehog.
"'Your Majesty,' he cried, 'this creature returns from the marshes of Kelfazin.
The people of El-ahrairah are mustering²⁵ for war. They say they are coming toattack Your Majesty's garden and steal the royal lettuces. May I have YourMajesty's order to take out the soldiers and destroy them?'
"'Aha!' said the King. 'I have thought of a trick worth two of that. "Particularlydeadly to rabbits." Well! Well! Let them have all the lettuces they want. In fact,you are to take a thousand down to the marshes of Kelfazin and leave them there.
Ho! Ho! What a joke! I feel all the better for it!'
"'Ah, what deadly cunning!' said El-ahrairah. 'No wonder Your Majesty is rulerof a great people. I believe you are already recovering. As with many illnesses, thecure is simple, once perceived. No, no, I will accept no reward. In any case, thereis nothing here that would be thought of value in the shining land beyond thegolden river of Frith. I have done as Prince Rainbow required. It is sufficient.
Perhaps you will be so good as to tell your guards to accompany me to the foot ofthe hill?' He bowed, and left the palace.
"Later that evening, as El-ahrairah was urging his rabbits to growl²⁶ morefiercely and run up and down in the marshes of Kelfazin, Prince Rainbow cameover the river.
"'El-ahrairah,' he called, 'am I bewitched?'
"'It is quite possible,' said El-ahrairah. 'The dreaded¹⁹ Lousepedoodle--'
"'There are a thousand lettuces in a pile at the top of the marsh³. Who put themthere?'
"'I told you they were being delivered,' said El-ahrairah. 'You could hardlyexpect my people, weak and hungry as they are, to carry them all the way fromKing Darzin's garden. However, they will soon recover now, under the treatmentthat I shall prescribe. I am a physician, I may say, and if you have not heard asmuch, Prince Rainbow, you may take it that you soon will, from another quarter.
Rabscuttle, go out and collect the lettuces.'
"Then Prince Rainbow saw that El-ahrairah had been as good as his word, andthat he himself must keep his promise, too. He let the rabbits out of the marshesof Kelfazin and they multiplied everywhere. And from that day to this, no poweron earth can keep a rabbit out of a vegetable garden, for El-ahrairah promptsthem with a thousand tricks, the best in the world."

1 belle   

n.靓女

参考例句：

• She was the belle of her Sunday School class.在主日学校她是她们班的班花。
• She was the belle of the ball.她是那个舞会中的美女。

2 followers   

追随者( follower的名词复数 )； 用户； 契据的附面； 从动件

参考例句：

• the followers of Mahatma Gandhi 圣雄甘地的拥护者
• The reformer soon gathered a band of followers round him. 改革者很快就获得一群追随者支持他。

3 marsh   

n.沼泽，湿地

参考例句：

• There are a lot of frogs in the marsh.沼泽里有许多青蛙。
• I made my way slowly out of the marsh.我缓慢地走出这片沼泽地。

4 marshes   

n.沼泽，湿地( marsh的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Cows were grazing on the marshes. 牛群在湿地上吃草。
• We had to cross the marshes. 我们不得不穿过那片沼泽地。 来自《简明英汉词典》

5 dreariest   

使人闷闷不乐或沮丧的( dreary的最高级 )； 阴沉的； 令人厌烦的； 单调的

参考例句：

• It was the dreariest job I had ever done. 那是我所做过的最沉闷的工作。

6 lettuces   

n.莴苣，生菜（ lettuce的名词复数 ）；生菜叶

参考例句：

• My lettuces have gone to seed. 我种的莴苣已结子。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Are these lettuces home-grown or did you buy them in the market? 这些生菜是自家种的呢，还是你在市场上买的？ 来自辞典例句

7 lettuce   

n.莴苣；生菜

参考例句：

• Get some lettuce and tomatoes so I can make a salad.买些莴苣和西红柿，我好做色拉。
• The lettuce is crisp and cold.莴苣松脆爽口。

8 sentries   

哨兵，步兵( sentry的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• We posted sentries at the gates of the camp. 我们在军营的大门口布置哨兵。
• We were guarded by sentries against surprise attack. 我们由哨兵守卫，以免遭受突袭。

9 plausible   

adj.似真实的，似乎有理的，似乎可信的

参考例句：

• His story sounded plausible.他说的那番话似乎是真实的。
• Her story sounded perfectly plausible.她的说辞听起来言之有理。

10 rascal   

n.流氓；不诚实的人

参考例句：

• If he had done otherwise,I should have thought him a rascal.如果他不这样做，我就认为他是个恶棍。
• The rascal was frightened into holding his tongue.这坏蛋吓得不敢往下说了。

11 snails   

n.蜗牛；迟钝的人；蜗牛( snail的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• I think I'll try the snails for lunch—I'm feeling adventurous today. 我想我午餐要尝一下蜗牛——我今天很想冒险。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Most snails have shells on their backs. 大多数蜗牛背上有壳。 来自《简明英汉词典》

12 squatted   

v.像动物一样蹲下( squat的过去式和过去分词 )；非法擅自占用（土地或房屋）；为获得其所有权；而占用某片公共用地。

参考例句：

• He squatted down beside the footprints and examined them closely. 他蹲在脚印旁仔细地观察。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He squatted in the grass discussing with someone. 他蹲在草地上与一个人谈话。 来自《简明英汉词典》

13 sentry   

n.哨兵，警卫

参考例句：

• They often stood sentry on snowy nights.他们常常在雪夜放哨。
• The sentry challenged anyone approaching the tent.哨兵查问任一接近帐篷的人。

14 scurried   

v.急匆匆地走( scurry的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• She said goodbye and scurried back to work. 她说声再见，然后扭头跑回去干活了。
• It began to rain and we scurried for shelter. 下起雨来，我们急忙找地方躲避。 来自《简明英汉词典》

15 burrows   

n.地洞( burrow的名词复数 )v.挖掘（洞穴），挖洞( burrow的第三人称单数 )；翻寻

参考例句：

• The intertidal beach unit contains some organism burrows. 潮间海滩单元含有一些生物潜穴。 来自辞典例句
• A mole burrows its way through the ground. 鼹鼠会在地下钻洞前进。 来自辞典例句

16 nibble   

n.轻咬，啃；v.一点点地咬，慢慢啃，吹毛求疵

参考例句：

• Inflation began to nibble away at their savings.通货膨胀开始蚕食他们的存款。
• The birds cling to the wall and nibble at the brickwork.鸟儿们紧贴在墙上，啄着砖缝。

17 strands   

n.（线、绳、金属线、毛发等的）股( strand的名词复数 )；缕；海洋、湖或河的)岸；（观点、计划、故事等的）部份v.使滞留，使搁浅( strand的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• Twist a length of rope from strands of hemp. 用几股麻搓成了一段绳子。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• She laced strands into a braid. 她把几股线编织成一根穗带。 来自《简明英汉词典》

18 alas   

int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等)

参考例句：

• Alas!The window is broken!哎呀！窗子破了！
• Alas,the truth is less romantic.然而，真理很少带有浪漫色彩。

19 dreaded   

adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词)

参考例句：

• The dreaded moment had finally arrived. 可怕的时刻终于来到了。
• He dreaded having to spend Christmas in hospital. 他害怕非得在医院过圣诞节不可。 来自《用法词典》

20 isolated   

adj.与世隔绝的

参考例句：

• His bad behaviour was just an isolated incident. 他的不良行为只是个别事件。
• Patients with the disease should be isolated. 这种病的患者应予以隔离。

21 complexities   

复杂性(complexity的名词复数)； 复杂的事物

参考例句：

• The complexities of life bothered him. 生活的复杂使他困惑。
• The complexities of life bothered me. 生活的杂乱事儿使我心烦。

22 afterward   

adv.后来；以后

参考例句：

• Let's go to the theatre first and eat afterward. 让我们先去看戏，然后吃饭。
• Afterward,the boy became a very famous artist.后来，这男孩成为一个很有名的艺术家。

23 gnawed   

咬( gnaw的过去式和过去分词 )； （长时间） 折磨某人； （使）苦恼； （长时间）危害某事物

参考例句：

• His attitude towards her gnawed away at her confidence. 他对她的态度一直在削弱她的自尊心。
• The root of this dead tree has been gnawed away by ants. 这棵死树根被蚂蚁唼了。

24 majesty   

n.雄伟，壮丽，庄严，威严；最高权威，王权

参考例句：

• The king had unspeakable majesty.国王有无法形容的威严。
• Your Majesty must make up your mind quickly!尊贵的陛下，您必须赶快做出决定！

25 mustering   

v.集合，召集，集结（尤指部队）( muster的现在分词 )；（自他人处）搜集某事物；聚集；激发

参考例句：

• He paused again, mustering his strength and thoughts. 他又停下来，集中力量，聚精会神。 来自辞典例句
• The LORD Almighty is mustering an army for war. 这是万军之耶和华点齐军队，预备打仗。 来自互联网

26 growl   

v.（狗等）嗥叫，（炮等）轰鸣；n.嗥叫，轰鸣

参考例句：

• The dog was biting,growling and wagging its tail.那条狗在一边撕咬一边低声吼叫，尾巴也跟着摇摆。
• The car growls along rutted streets.汽车在车辙纵横的街上一路轰鸣。