THE VIRGIN1 ISSUE Can you believe N? He was thisclose to getting a nice slice of B pie, if you know what I mean. I guess we’re supposed to admire his self-control, his ability to keep the old hot dog in the bun. But I bet B really wouldn’t have minded too much if N had just kept his mouth shut and got on with it instead of getting all moral on her and telling her all about his time with S. I mean, who’s B going to lose it to now? I was wrong about boys. I always thought they’d do anything to bag a virgin. I mean, I thought N would like the idea that B has never done it. But he doesn’t seem to care about that at all. All it does is make having sex with her this huge thing that he can’t deal with without smoking a big fattie and downing half a bottle of JD. So disappointing. Not that he was too quick to jump S’s bones either, and we all know she’s no virgin. Maybe N just has high moral standards. Ooh, that makes me like him even more. Your E-mail Hey gossip girl,i saw S go upstairs with some dude at the Tribeca Star. she was wasted. i was kind of tempted2 to knock on the door and see if there was a party going on or s/t, but i chickened out. i just wanted your advice. do you think she’d do me? i mean, she looks pretty easy.—Coop Dear Coop, If you’re the type of guy who has to ask, then probably not. S may be a ho, but she has excellent taste. —GGSightingsJust one: N at the burrito place on Lexington, chatting up the cute girl behind the counter. She gave him extra guacamole for free. Yeah, I bet she did. You know you love me, “Dan,” Jenny whispered, poking3 at her brother’s chest. “Wake up.” Dan flung his hand over his eyes and kicked at his sheets. “Go away. It’s Saturday,” he mumbled4. “Please get up,” Jenny whined5. She sat down on the bed, poking him repeatedly until he removed his arm to glare at her. “What’s your problem?” Dan said. “Leave me alone.” “No,” Jenny insisted. “We have to go shopping.” “Right,” Dan said. He rolled over, turning his head toward the wall. “Please, Dan. I have to get a dress for the party on Friday and you have to help me. Dad gave me his credit card. He said you could get a tux, too.” Jenny giggled6. “Since we’re turning out to be the type of spoiled rotten kids that will need tuxes and dresses and all that crap.” Dan rolled over. “I’m not going to that party,” he said. “Shut up. Yes you are. You’re going and you’re going to meet Serena and dance with her. I’ll introduce you. She’s totally cool,” Jenny burbled happily. “No,” Dan said stubbornly. “Well, you can at least help me pick out a dress,” Jenny pouted7. “Because I’m going. And I want to look nice.” “Can’t Dad go with you?” Dan asked. “Yeah, right. I said I wanted to look nice,” Jenny scoffed8. “You know what Dad told me? He said, ‘Go to Sears, it’s the proletariandepartment store.’ Whatever that means. I don’t even know where Sears is, if it even exists anymore. Anyway, I want to go to Barneys. I can’t believe I’ve never even been there. I bet people like Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf go there, like, every day.” Dan sat up and yawned loudly. Jenny was all dressed and ready to go, with her curly hair pulled back into a ponytail. She even had her jacket and shoes on. She looked so cute and eager, it was kind of hard to say no. “You’re such a pain in my ass,” Dan said, standing9 up and stumbling toward the bathroom. “You know you love me,” Jenny called after him. As far as Dan was concerned, Barneys was full of assholes, down to the dude who opened the door for him, smiling in the cheesiest way possible. But Jenny loved it, and even though she had never been there, she seemed to know everything about the place. She knew not to bother with the lower floors, which were full of designer clothes she could never afford, and headed straight to the top floor Co-op. And when the elevator doors rolled open, she felt like she had died and gone to heaven. There were so many beautiful dresses hanging on the racks it made her salivate to look at them. She wanted to try them all on, but of course she couldn’t. When you’re a 34D, you’re kind of limited. And you definitely need help. “Dan, will you go ask that woman to help me find this in my size,” Jenny whispered, fingering a purple velvet10 empire-waist sheath with beaded straps11. She pulled out the price tag. Six hundred bucks12. “Jesus Christ!” Dan said, looking at the price over her shoulder. “No way.” “I’m just trying it on for fun,” Jenny insisted. “I won’t buy it.” She held the dress up to herself. The bodice would barely cover her nipples. Jenny sighed and put the dress back on the rack. “Would you please ask that lady if she’ll help me?” she repeated. “Why can’t you ask?” Dan said. He shoved his hands in his corduroys and leaned against a wooden hat rack. “Please?” Jenny said. “Fine.” Dan strode over to a haggard looking woman with frosted blond hair. She looked like she’d been working in department stores her entire life, only taking one vacation a year in Atlantic City, New Jersey13. Dan imagined her chain-smoking Virginia Slims down on the boardwalk, worrying about how the girls back at the store were managing without her. “Can I help you, young man?” the woman asked him. Her name tag said “Maureen.” Dan smiled. “Hello. Do you think you could help my sister find a nice dress? She’s over there.” He pointed14 at Jenny, who was studying the price tag of a red silk wraparound with ruffles15 on the sleeves. Jenny had taken off her jacket and was wearing a white T-shirt. Dan could not deny it. Her boobs were really huge. “Yes, of course,” Maureen said, striding purposefully toward Jenny. Dan stayed where he was, glancing around the room and feeling completely out of place. Behind him, he heard a familiar voice. “I look like a nun16, Mom, I swear. It’s just completely wrong.” “Oh, Serena,” another voice said. “I think it’s darling. What if you just unbutton the collar a bit. There. See? It’s very Jackie O.” Dan spun17 around. A tall, middle-aged18 woman with Serena’s coloring was standing half in, half out of a curtained dressing19 room. The curtain was slightly parted, and Dan could just see a bit of Serena’s hair, her collarbone, her bare feet, the toenails painted dark red. His cheeks burned, and he bolted for the elevator. “Hey Dan, where’re you going?” Jenny called over to him. Her arms were already piled high with dresses, and Maureen was flicking20 efficiently21 through the racks, while giving her all sorts of good advice about support bras and the latest figure-enhancing underwear. Jenny had never been happier. “Gonna check out the men’s stuff,” Dan mumbled, glancing nervously22 toward the side of the room where he’d spotted23 Serena.
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1
virgin
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| n.处女，未婚女子；adj.未经使用的；未经开发的 | |
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tempted
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| v.怂恿（某人）干不正当的事；冒…的险（tempt的过去分词） | |
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poking
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| n. 刺，戳，袋 vt. 拨开，刺，戳 vi. 戳，刺，捅，搜索，伸出，行动散慢 | |
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mumbled
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| 含糊地说某事，叽咕，咕哝( mumble的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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whined
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| v.哀号( whine的过去式和过去分词 )；哀诉，诉怨 | |
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giggled
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| v.咯咯地笑( giggle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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pouted
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| v.撅（嘴）( pout的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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scoffed
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| 嘲笑，嘲弄( scoff的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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velvet
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| n.丝绒，天鹅绒；adj.丝绒制的，柔软的 | |
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straps
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| n.带子( strap的名词复数 )；挎带；肩带；背带v.用皮带捆扎( strap的第三人称单数 )；用皮带抽打；包扎；给…打绷带 | |
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12
bucks
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| n.雄鹿( buck的名词复数 )；钱；（英国十九世纪初的）花花公子；（用于某些表达方式）责任v.（马等）猛然弓背跃起( buck的第三人称单数 )；抵制；猛然震荡；马等尥起后蹄跳跃 | |
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jersey
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| n.运动衫 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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ruffles
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| 褶裥花边( ruffle的名词复数 ) | |
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nun
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| n.修女，尼姑 | |
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spun
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| v.纺，杜撰，急转身 | |
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middle-aged
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| adj.中年的 | |
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dressing
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| n.(食物)调料；包扎伤口的用品，敷料 | |
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flicking
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| （尤指用手指或手快速地）轻击( flick的现在分词 )； （用…）轻挥； （快速地）按开关； 向…笑了一下（或瞥了一眼等） | |
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efficiently
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| adv.高效率地，有能力地 | |
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nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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spotted
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| adj.有斑点的，斑纹的，弄污了的 | |
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