Yet was he sorrowful! He was gloomy, and fell into a reverie about himself, a subject to him ever perplexing and distressing10. His conversation of the morning with Doctor Masham recurred11 to him. What did the Doctor mean by his character not being formed, and that he might yet live to change all his opinions? Character! what was character? It must be will; and his will was violent and firm. Young as he was, he had early habituated himself to reflection, and the result of his musings had been a desire to live away from the world with those he loved. The world, as other men viewed it, had no charms for him. Its pursuits and passions seemed to him on the whole paltry13 and faint. He could sympathise with great deeds, but not with bustling14 life. That which was common did not please him. He loved things that were rare and strange; and the spell that bound him so strongly to Venetia Herbert was her unusual life, and the singular circumstances of her destiny that were not unknown to him. True he was young; but, lord of himself, youth was associated with none of those mortifications which make the juvenile16 pant for manhood. Cadurcis valued his youth and treasured it. He could not conceive love, and the romantic life that love should lead, without the circumambient charm of youth adding fresh lustre17 to all that was bright and fair, and a keener relish18 to every combination of enjoyment. The moonbeam fell upon his mother’s monument, a tablet on the cloister5 wall that recorded the birth and death of KATHERINE CADURCIS. His thoughts flew to his ancestry19. They had conquered in France and Palestine, and left a memorable20 name to the annalist of his country. Those days were past, and yet Cadurcis felt within him the desire, perhaps the power, of emulating21 them; but what remained? What career was open in this mechanical age to the chivalric22 genius of his race? Was he misplaced then in life? The applause of nations, there was something grand and exciting in such a possession. To be the marvel23 of mankind what would he not hazard? Dreams, dreams! If his ancestors were valiant24 and celebrated25 it remained for him to rival, to excel them, at least in one respect. Their coronet had never rested on a brow fairer than the one for which he destined26 it. Venetia then, independently of his passionate27 love, was the only apparent object worth his pursuit, the only thing in this world that had realised his dreams, dreams sacred to his own musing12 soul, that even she had never shared or guessed. And she, she was to be his. He could not doubt it: but tomorrow would decide; tomorrow would seal his triumph.
His sleep was short and restless; he had almost out-watched the stars, and yet he rose with the early morn. His first thought was of Venetia; he was impatient for the interview, the interview she promised and even proposed. The fresh air was grateful to him; he bounded along to Cherbury, and brushed the dew in his progress from the tall grass and shrubs28. In sight of the hall, he for a moment paused. He was before his accustomed hour; and yet he was always too soon. Not today, though, not today; suddenly he rushes forward and springs down the green vista29, for Venetia is on the terrace, and alone!
Always kind, this morning she greeted him with unusual affection. Never had she seemed to him so exquisitely30 beautiful. Perhaps her countenance31 today was more pale than wont32. There seemed a softness in her eyes usually so brilliant and even dazzling; the accents of her salutation were suppressed and tender.
‘I thought you would be here early,’ she remarked, ‘and therefore I rose to meet you.’
Was he to infer from this artless confession33 that his image had haunted her in her dreams, or only that she would not delay the conversation on which his happiness depended? He could scarcely doubt which version to adopt when she took his arm and led him from the terrace to walk where they could not be disturbed.
‘Dear Plantagenet,’ she said, ‘for indeed you are very dear to me; I told you last night that I would speak to you today on your wishes, that are so kind to me and so much intended for my happiness. I do not love suspense34; but indeed last night I was too much surprised, too much overcome by what occurred, that exhausted35 as I naturally was by all our pleasure, I could not tell you what I wished; indeed I could not, dear Plantagenet.’
‘My own Venetia!’
‘So I hope you will always deem me; for I should be very unhappy if you did not love me, Plantagenet, more unhappy than I have even been these last two years; and I have been very unhappy, very unhappy indeed, Plantagenet.’
‘Unhappy, Venetia! my Venetia unhappy?’
‘Listen! I will not weep. I can control my feelings. I have learnt to do this; it is very sad, and very different to what my life once was; but I can do it.’
‘You amaze me!’
Venetia sighed, and then resumed, but in a tone mournful and low, and yet to a degree firm.
‘You have been away five years, Plantagenet.’
‘But you have pardoned that.’
‘I never blamed you; I had nothing to pardon. It was well for you to be away; and I rejoice your absence has been so profitable to you.’
‘But it was wicked to have been so silent.’
‘Oh! no, no, no! Such ideas never entered into my head, nor even mamma’s. You were very young; you did as all would, as all must do. Harbour not such thoughts. Enough, you have returned and love us yet.’
‘Love! adore!’
‘Five years are a long space of time, Plantagenet. Events will happen in five years, even at Cherbury. I told you I was changed.’
‘Yes!’ said Lord Cadurcis, in a voice of some anxiety, with a scrutinising eye.
‘You left me a happy child; you find me a woman, and a miserable36 one.’
‘Good God, Venetia! this suspense is awful. Be brief, I pray you. Has any one —’
Venetia looked at him with an air of perplexity. She could not comprehend the idea that impelled37 his interruption.
‘Go on,’ Lord Cadurcis added, after a short pause; ‘I am indeed all anxiety.’
‘You remember that Christmas which you passed at the hall and walking at night in the gallery, and —’
‘Well! Your mother, I shall never forget it.’
‘You found her weeping when you were once at Marringhurst. You told me of it.’
‘Ay, ay!’
‘There is a wing of our house shut up. We often talked of it.’
‘Often, Venetia; it was a mystery.’
‘I have penetrated38 it,’ replied Venetia in a solemn tone; ‘and never have I known what happiness is since.’
‘Yes, yes!’ said Lord Cadurcis, very pale, and in a whisper.
‘Plantagenet, I have a father.’
Lord Cadurcis started, and for an instant his arm quitted Venetia’s. At length he said in a gloomy voice, ‘I know it.’
‘Know it!’ exclaimed Venetia with astonishment39. ‘Who could have told you the secret?’
‘It is no secret,’ replied Cadurcis; ‘would that it were!’
‘Would that it were! How strange you speak, how strange you look, Plantagenet! If it be no secret that I have a father, why this concealment40 then? I know that I am not the child of shame!’ she added, after a moment’s pause, with an air of pride. A tear stole down the cheek of Cadurcis.
‘Plantagenet! dear, good Plantagenet! my brother! my own brother! see, I kneel to you; Venetia kneels to you! your own Venetia! Venetia that you love! Oh! if you knew the load that is on my spirit bearing me down to a grave which I would almost welcome, you would speak to me; you would tell me all. I have sighed for this; I have longed for this; I have prayed for this. To meet some one who would speak to me of my father; who had heard of him, who knew him; has been for years the only thought of my being, the only object for which I existed. And now, here comes Plantagenet, my brother! my own brother! and he knows all, and he will tell me; yes, that he will; he will tell his Venetia all, all!’
‘Is there not your mother?’ said Lord Cadurcis, in a broken tone.
‘Forbidden, utterly41 forbidden. If I speak, they tell me her heart will break; and therefore mine is breaking.’
‘Have you no friend?’
‘Are not you my friend?’
‘Doctor Masham?’
‘I have applied42 to him; he tells me that he lives, and then he shakes his head.’
‘You never saw your father; think not of him.’
‘Not think of him!’ exclaimed Venetia, with extraordinary energy. ‘Of what else? For what do I live but to think of him? What object have I in life but to see him? I have seen him, once.’
‘Ah!’
‘I know his form by heart, and yet it was but a shade. Oh, what a shade! what a glorious, what an immortal43 shade! If gods were upon earth they would be like my father!’
‘His deeds, at least, are not godlike,’ observed Lord Cadurcis dryly, and with some bitterness.
‘I deny it!’ said Venetia, her eyes sparkling with fire, her form dilated44 with enthusiasm, and involuntarily withdrawing her arm from her companion. Lord Cadurcis looked exceedingly astonished.
‘You deny it!’ he exclaimed. ‘And what should you know about it?’
‘Nature whispers to me that nothing but what is grand and noble could be breathed by those lips, or fulfilled by that form.’
‘I am glad you have not read his works,’ said Lord Cadurcis, with increased bitterness. ‘As for his conduct, your mother is a living evidence of his honour, his generosity45, and his virtue46.’
‘My mother!’ said Venetia, in a softened47 voice; ‘and yet he loved my mother!’
‘She was his victim, as a thousand others may have been.’
‘She is his wife!’ replied Venetia, with some anxiety.
‘Yes, a deserted48 wife; is that preferable to being a cherished mistress? More honourable49, but scarcely less humiliating.’
‘She must have misunderstood him,’ said Venetia. ‘I have perused50 the secret vows52 of his passion. I have read his praises of her beauty. I have pored over the music of his emotions when he first became a father; yes, he has gazed on me, even though but for a moment, with love! Over me he has breathed forth53 the hallowed blessing54 of a parent! That transcendent form has pressed his lips to mine, and held me with fondness to his heart! And shall I credit aught to his dishonour55? Is there a being in existence who can persuade me he is heartless or abandoned? No! I love him! I adore him! I am devoted56 to him with all the energies of my being! I live only on the memory that he lives, and, were he to die, I should pray to my God that I might join him without delay in a world where it cannot be justice to separate a child from a father.’
And this was Venetia! the fair, the serene57 Venetia! the young, the inexperienced Venetia! pausing, as it were, on the parting threshold of girlhood, whom, but a few hours since, he had fancied could scarcely have proved a passion; who appeared to him barely to comprehend the meaning of his advances; for whose calmness or whose coldness he had consoled himself by the flattering conviction of her unknowing innocence58. Before him stood a beautiful and inspired Moenad, her eye flashing supernatural fire, her form elevated above her accustomed stature59, defiance60 on her swelling61 brow, and passion on her quivering lip!
Gentle and sensitive as Cadurcis ever appeared to those he loved, there was in his soul a deep and unfathomed well of passions that had been never stirred, and a bitter and mocking spirit in his brain, of which he was himself unconscious. He had repaired this hopeful morn to Cherbury to receive, as he believed, the plighted63 faith of a simple and affectionate, perhaps grateful, girl. That her unsophisticated and untutored spirit might not receive the advances of his heart with an equal and corresponding ardour, he was prepared. It pleased him that he should watch the gradual development of this bud of sweet affections, waiting, with proud anxiety, her fragrant64 and her full-blown love. But now it appeared that her coldness or her indifference65 might be ascribed to any other cause than the one to which he had attributed it, the innocence of an inexperienced mind. This girl was no stranger to powerful passions; she could love, and love with fervency66, with devotion, with enthusiasm. This child of joy was a woman of deep and thoughtful sorrows, brooding in solitude67 over high resolves and passionate aspirations68. Why were not the emotions of such a tumultuous soul excited by himself? To him she was calm and imperturbable69; she called him brother, she treated him as a child. But a picture, a fantastic shade, could raise in her a tempestuous70 swell62 of sentiment that transformed her whole mind, and changed the colour of all her hopes and thoughts. Deeply prejudiced against her father, Cadurcis now hated him, and with a fell and ferocious71 earnestness that few bosoms72 but his could prove. Pale with rage, he ground his teeth and watched her with a glance of sarcastic73 aversion.
‘You led me here to listen to a communication which interested me,’ he at length said. ‘Have I heard it?’
His altered tone, the air of haughtiness74 which he assumed, were not lost upon Venetia. She endeavoured to collect herself, but she hesitated to reply.
‘I repeat my inquiry,’ said Cadurcis. ‘Have you brought me here only to inform me that you have a father, and that you adore him, or his picture?’
‘I led you here,’ replied Venetia, in a subdued75 tone, and looking on the ground, ‘to thank you for your love, and to confess to you that I love another.’
‘Love another!’ exclaimed Cadurcis, in a tone of derision. Simpleton! The best thing your mother can do is to lock you up in the chamber76 with the picture that has produced such marvellous effects.’
‘I am no simpleton, Plantagenet,’ rejoined Venetia, quietly, ‘but one who is acting77 as she thinks right; and not only as her mind, but as her heart prompts her.’
They had stopped in the earlier part of this conversation on a little plot of turf surrounded by shrubs; Cadurcis walked up and down this area with angry steps, occasionally glancing at Venetia with a look of mortification15 and displeasure.
‘I tell you, Venetia,’ he at length said, ‘that you are a little fool. What do you mean by saying that you cannot marry me because you love another? Is not that other, by your own account, your father? Love him as much as you like. Is that to prevent you from loving your husband also?’
‘Plantagenet, you are rude, and unnecessarily so,’ said Venetia. ‘I repeat to you again, and for the last time, that all my heart is my father’s. It would be wicked in me to marry you, because I cannot love you as a husband should be loved. I can never love you as I love my father. However, it is useless to talk upon this subject. I have not even the power of marrying you if I wished, for I have dedicated78 myself to my father in the name of God; and I have offered a vow51, to be registered in heaven, that thenceforth I would exist only for the purpose of being restored to his heart.’
‘I congratulate you on your parent, Miss Herbert.’
‘I feel that I ought to be proud of him, though, alas79 I can only feel it. But, whatever your opinion may be of my father, I beg you to remember that you are speaking to his child.’
‘I shall state my opinion respecting your father, madam, with the most perfect unreserve, wherever and whenever I choose; quite convinced that, however you esteem80 that opinion, it will not be widely different from the real sentiments of the only parent whom you ought to respect, and whom you are bound to obey.’
‘And I can tell you, sir, that whatever your opinion is on any subject it will never influence mine. If, indeed, I were the mistress of my own destiny, which I am not, it would have been equally out of my power to have acted as you have so singularly proposed. I do not wish to marry, and marry I never will; but were it in my power, or in accordance with my wish, to unite my fate for ever with another’s, it should at least be with one to whom I could look up with reverence81, and even with admiration82. He should be at least a man, and a great man; one with whose name the world rung; perhaps, like my father, a genius and a poet.’
‘A genius and a poet!’ exclaimed Lord Cadurcis, in a fury, stamping with passion; ‘are these fit terms to use when speaking of the most abandoned profligate83 of his age? A man whose name is synonymous with infamy84, and which no one dares to breathe in civilised life; whose very blood is pollution, as you will some day feel; who has violated every tie, and derided85 every principle, by which society is maintained; whose life is a living illustration of his own shameless doctrines86; who is, at the same time, a traitor87 to his king and an apostate88 from his God!’
Curiosity, overpowering even indignation, had permitted Venetia to listen even to this tirade89. Pale as her companion, but with a glance of withering90 scorn, she exclaimed, ‘Passionate and ill-mannered boy! words cannot express the disgust and the contempt with which you inspire me.’ She spoke91 and she disappeared. Cadurcis was neither able nor desirous to arrest her flight. He remained rooted to the ground, muttering to himself the word ‘boy!’ Suddenly raising his arm and looking up to the sky, he exclaimed, ‘The illusion is vanished! Farewell, Cherbury! farewell, Cadurcis! a wider theatre awaits me! I have been too long the slave of soft affections! I root them out of my heart for ever!’ and, fitting the action to the phrase, it seemed that he hurled92 upon the earth all the tender emotions of his soul. ‘Woman! henceforth you shall be my sport! I have now no feeling but for myself. When she spoke I might have been a boy; I am a boy no longer. What I shall do I know not; but this I know, the world shall ring with my name; I will be a man, and a great man!’
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1
slumber
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| n.睡眠，沉睡状态 | |
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irresistible
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| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
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enjoyment
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| n.乐趣；享有；享用 | |
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melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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cloister
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| n.修道院；v.隐退，使与世隔绝 | |
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cloisters
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| n.（学院、修道院、教堂等建筑的）走廊( cloister的名词复数 )；回廊；修道院的生活；隐居v.隐退，使与世隔绝( cloister的第三人称单数 ) | |
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monotonous
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| adj.单调的，一成不变的，使人厌倦的 | |
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inexplicable
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| adj.无法解释的，难理解的 | |
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joyful
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| adj.欢乐的，令人欢欣的 | |
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distressing
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| a.使人痛苦的 | |
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recurred
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| 再发生，复发( recur的过去式和过去分词 )； 治愈 | |
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musing
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| n. 沉思，冥想 adj. 沉思的, 冥想的 动词muse的现在分词形式 | |
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paltry
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| adj.无价值的，微不足道的 | |
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bustling
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| adj.喧闹的 | |
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mortification
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| n.耻辱，屈辱 | |
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juvenile
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| n.青少年，少年读物；adj.青少年的，幼稚的 | |
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lustre
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| n.光亮，光泽；荣誉 | |
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relish
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| n.滋味，享受，爱好，调味品；vt.加调味料，享受，品味；vi.有滋味 | |
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ancestry
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| n.祖先，家世 | |
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memorable
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| adj.值得回忆的，难忘的，特别的，显著的 | |
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emulating
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| v.与…竞争( emulate的现在分词 )；努力赶上；计算机程序等仿真；模仿 | |
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chivalric
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| 有武士气概的，有武士风范的 | |
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marvel
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| vi.(at)惊叹vt.感到惊异；n.令人惊异的事 | |
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valiant
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| adj.勇敢的，英勇的；n.勇士，勇敢的人 | |
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celebrated
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| adj.有名的，声誉卓著的 | |
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destined
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| adj.命中注定的；(for)以…为目的地的 | |
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passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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shrubs
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| 灌木( shrub的名词复数 ) | |
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vista
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| n.远景，深景，展望，回想 | |
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exquisitely
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| adv.精致地；强烈地；剧烈地；异常地 | |
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countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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confession
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| n.自白，供认，承认 | |
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suspense
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| n.（对可能发生的事）紧张感，担心，挂虑 | |
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exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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impelled
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| v.推动、推进或敦促某人做某事( impel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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penetrated
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| adj. 击穿的，鞭辟入里的 动词penetrate的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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concealment
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| n.隐藏, 掩盖，隐瞒 | |
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utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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immortal
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| adj.不朽的；永生的，不死的；神的 | |
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dilated
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| adj.加宽的，扩大的v.（使某物）扩大，膨胀，张大( dilate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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generosity
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| n.大度，慷慨，慷慨的行为 | |
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virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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softened
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| （使）变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 )； 缓解打击； 缓和； 安慰 | |
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deserted
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| adj.荒芜的，荒废的，无人的，被遗弃的 | |
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honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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perused
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| v.读（某篇文字）( peruse的过去式和过去分词 )；（尤指）细阅；审阅；匆匆读或心不在焉地浏览（某篇文字） | |
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vow
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| n.誓(言)，誓约；v.起誓，立誓 | |
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vows
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| 誓言( vow的名词复数 )； 郑重宣布，许愿 | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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blessing
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| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
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dishonour
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| n./vt.拒付（支票、汇票、票据等）；vt.凌辱，使丢脸；n.不名誉，耻辱，不光彩 | |
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56
devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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serene
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| adj. 安详的，宁静的，平静的 | |
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innocence
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| n.无罪；天真；无害 | |
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stature
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| n.（高度）水平，（高度）境界，身高，身材 | |
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defiance
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| n.挑战，挑衅，蔑视，违抗 | |
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swelling
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| n.肿胀 | |
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swell
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| vi.膨胀，肿胀；增长，增强 | |
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plighted
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| vt.保证，约定（plight的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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fragrant
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| adj.芬香的，馥郁的，愉快的 | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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fervency
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| n.热情的；强烈的；热烈 | |
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solitude
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| n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方 | |
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aspirations
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| 强烈的愿望( aspiration的名词复数 )； 志向； 发送气音； 发 h 音 | |
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imperturbable
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| adj.镇静的 | |
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tempestuous
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| adj.狂暴的 | |
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ferocious
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| adj.凶猛的，残暴的，极度的，十分强烈的 | |
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bosoms
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| 胸部( bosom的名词复数 )； 胸怀； 女衣胸部（或胸襟）； 和爱护自己的人在一起的情形 | |
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sarcastic
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| adj.讥讽的，讽刺的，嘲弄的 | |
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haughtiness
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| n.傲慢；傲气 | |
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subdued
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| adj. 屈服的，柔和的，减弱的 动词subdue的过去式和过去分词 | |
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chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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dedicated
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| adj.一心一意的；献身的；热诚的 | |
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alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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esteem
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| n.尊敬，尊重；vt.尊重，敬重；把…看作 | |
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reverence
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| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
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admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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profligate
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| adj.行为不检的；n.放荡的人，浪子，肆意挥霍者 | |
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infamy
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| n.声名狼藉，出丑，恶行 | |
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derided
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| v.取笑，嘲笑( deride的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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doctrines
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| n.教条( doctrine的名词复数 )；教义；学说；（政府政策的）正式声明 | |
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traitor
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| n.叛徒，卖国贼 | |
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apostate
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| n.背叛者，变节者 | |
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tirade
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| n.冗长的攻击性演说 | |
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withering
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| 使人畏缩的，使人害羞的，使人难堪的 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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hurled
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| v.猛投，用力掷( hurl的过去式和过去分词 )；大声叫骂 | |
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