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A Slip of the Tongue in Salutation
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If a poor mortal has some difficulty in guarding against that spirit of mischief1 which dwells aloft, he has still more in clearing himself of the absurd consequences when that spirit trips him up. I am in both predicaments at once; coming to make you my morning salutation, which should have taken the orthodox form of Rejoice, I bade you, in a very choice fit of absent-mindedness, Be healthy — a good enough wish in its way, but a little untimely and unconnected with that early hour. I at once went moist and red, not quite aware whether I was on my head or my heels; some of the company took me for a lunatic, no doubt, some thought I was in my second childhood, some that I had not quite got over my last night’s wine — though you yourself were the pink of good manners, not showing your consciousness of the slip by any ghost of a smile. It occurred to me to write to myself a little something in the way of comfort, and so modify the distress2 my blunder gave me — prove to myself that it was not absolutely unpardonable for an old man to transgress3 etiquette4 so flagrantly before so many witnesses. As to apology, there could be no occasion for that, when one’s slip had resulted in so well-omened a wish.

I began to write expecting my task to be very difficult, but found plenty of material as I went on. I will defer6 it, however, till I have cleared the way with a few necessary remarks on the three forms — Rejoice or Joy, Prosper7 or Prosperity, Hail or Health. Joy is a very ancient greeting; but it was not confined to the morning, or the first meeting. They did use it when they first saw one another:

Joy to thee, Lord of this Tirynthian land!

But again at the moment when the wine succeeded to the meal:

Achilles, Joy! We lack not fair repast —

so says Odysseus discharging his embassy. And even at parting:

Joy be with you! And henceforth know me God, No longer mortal man.

In fact the apostrophe was not limited to any particular season, as now to the morning alone; indeed they used it on gloomy, nay8, on the most lamentable9 occasions; in Euripides, Polynices ends his life with the words,

Joy with you! for the darkness closes on me.

Nor was it necessarily significative of friendliness10; it could express hatred11 and the determination to see no more of another. To wish much joy to, was a regular form for ceasing to care about.

The modern use of the word dates back to Philippides the dispatch-runner. Bringing the news of Marathon, he found the archons seated, in suspense12 regarding the issue of the battle. ‘Joy, we win!’ he said, and died upon his message, breathing his last in the word Joy. The earliest letter beginning with it is that in which Cleon the Athenian demagogue, writing from Sphacteria, sends the good news of his victory and capture of Spartans13 at that place. However, later than that we find Nicias writing from Sicily and keeping to the older custom of coming to business at once with no such introduction.

Now the admirable Plato, no bad authority on such matters, would have us reject the salutation Joy altogether; it is a mean wish, wanting in seriousness, according to him; his substitute is Prosperity, which stands for a satisfactory condition both of body and soul; in a letter to Dionysius, he reproves him for commencing a hymn14 to Apollo with Joy, which he maintains is unworthy of the Pythian, and not fit even for men of any discretion15, not to mention Gods.

Pythagoras the mystic has vouchsafed16 us no writings of his own; but we may infer from his disciples17, Ocellus the Lucanian and Archytas, for instance, that he headed his letters neither with Joy nor Prosperity, but recommended beginning with Hail. At any rate all the Pythagoreans in writing to one another (when their tone is serious, that is) started with wishing Health, which they took to be the prime need of soul and body alike, and to include all human blessings18. The Pentagram 30, that interlaced triple triangle which served them as a sort of password, they called by the name Health. They argued that Health included Joy and Prosperity, but that neither of those two was coextensive with Health. Some of them gave to the Quaternion, 31 which is their most solemn oath, and sums their perfect number, the name of Beginning of Health. Philolaus might be quoted.

But I need hardly go so far back. Epicurus assuredly rejoiced in joy — pleasure was the chief Good in his eyes; yet in his most earnest letters (which are not very numerous), and in those to his most intimate friends, he starts with Hail. And in tragedy and the old comedy you will constantly find it used quite at the beginning. You remember,

Hail to thee, joy be thine —

which puts health before rejoicing clearly enough. And says Alexis:

All hail, my lord; after long time thou comest.

Again Achaeus:

I come in sorry plight19, yet wish thee health.

And Philemon:

Health first I ask, and next prosperity, Joy thirdly, and to owe not any man.

As for the writer of the drinking-song mentioned in Plato, what says he? —‘Best is health, and second beauty, and third wealth’; joy he never so much as names. I need hardly adduce the trite20 saw:

Chief of them that blessings give, Health, with thee I mean to live.

But, if Health is chief, her gift, which is the enjoyment21 of health, should rank before other Goods.

I could multiply these examples by the thousand from poets, historians, philosophers, who give Health the place of honour; but you will not require any such childish pedantry22 of me, wiping out my original offence by another; I shall do better to add a historical anecdote23 or two which occur to me as relevant.

Eumenes of Cardia, writing to Antipater, states that just before the battle of Issus, Hephaestion came at dawn into Alexander’s tent. Either in absence of mind and confusion like mine, or else under a divine impulse, he gave the evening salutation like me —‘Hail, sire; ’tis time we were at our posts.’ All present were confounded at the irregularity, and Hephaestion himself was like to die of shame, when Alexander said, ‘I take the omen5; it is a promise that we shall come back safe from battle.’

Antiochus Soter, about to engage the Galatians, dreamed that Alexander stood over him and told him to give his men the password Health; and with this word it was that he won that marvellous victory.

Ptolemy, the son of Lagus, in a letter to Seleucus, just reversed the usual order, bidding him Hail at the beginning, and adding Rejoice at the end instead of wishing him Health; this is recorded by Dionysodorus, the collector of his letters.

The case of Pyrrhus the Epirot is well worth mention; as a general he was only second to Alexander, and he experienced a thousand vicissitudes24 of fortune. In all his prayers, sacrifices, and offerings, he never asked for victory or increase of his royal dignity, for fame or excessive wealth; his whole prayer was always in one word, Health; as long as he had that, he thought all else would come of itself. And it was true wisdom, in my opinion; he remembered that all other good things are worthless, if health is wanting.

Oh, certainly (says some one); but we have assigned each form to its proper place by this time; and if you disregard that — even though there was no bad meaning in what you did say — you cannot fairly claim to have made no mistake; it is as though one should put a helmet on the shins, or greaves on the head. My dear sir (I reply), your simile25 would go on all fours if there were any season at all which did not require health; but in point of fact it is needed in the morning and at noonday and at night — especially by busy rulers like you Romans, to whom physical condition is so important. And again, the man who gives you Joy is only beginning auspiciously26; it is no more than a prayer; whereas he who bids you Hail is doing you a practical service in reminding you of the means to health; his is more than a prayer, it is a precept28.

Why, in that book of instructions which you all receive from the Emperor, is not the first recommendation to take care of your health? Quite rightly; that is the condition precedent29 of efficiency. Moreover, if I know any Latin, you yourselves, in returning a salutation, constantly use the equivalent of Health.

However, all this does not mean that I have deliberately30 abandoned Rejoice and substituted Hail for it. I admit that it was quite unintentional; I am not so foolish as to innovate31 like that, and exchange the regular formulae.

No, I only thank Heaven that my stumble had such very fortunate results, landing me in a better position than I had designed; may it not be that Health itself, or Asclepius, inspired me to give you this promise of health? How else should it have befallen me? In the course of a long life I have never been guilty of such a confusion before.

Or, if I may not have recourse to the supernatural, it is no wonder that my extreme desire to be known to you for good should so confuse me as to work the contrary effect. Possibly, too, one might be robbed of one’s presence of mind by the crowd of military persons pushing for precedence, or treating the salutation ceremony in their cavalier fashion.

As to yourself, I feel sure that, however others may have referred it to stupidity, ignorance, or lunacy, you took it as the sign of a modest, simple, unspoiled, unsophisticated soul. Absolute confidence in such matters comes dangerously near audacity32 and impudence33. My first wish would be to make no such blunder; my second that, if I did, the resulting omen should be good.

There is a story told of the first Augustus. He had given a correct legal decision, which acquitted34 a maligned35 person of a most serious charge. The latter expressed his gratitude36 in a loud voice, thus:—‘I thank your majesty37 for this bad and inequitable verdict.’ Augustus’s attendants raged, and were ready to tear the man to pieces. But the Emperor restrained them; ‘Never mind what he said; it is what he meant that matters.’ That was Augustus’s view. Well, take my meaning, and it was good; or take my word, and it was auspicious27.

And now that I have got to this point, I have reason to fear that I may be suspected of having made the slip on purpose, leading up to this apology. O God of health, only grant me that the quality of my piece may justify38 the notion that I wanted no more than a peg39 whereon to hang an essay!

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1 mischief jDgxH     
n.损害,伤害,危害;恶作剧,捣蛋,胡闹
参考例句:
  • Nobody took notice of the mischief of the matter. 没有人注意到这件事情所带来的危害。
  • He seems to intend mischief.看来他想捣蛋。
2 distress 3llzX     
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛
参考例句:
  • Nothing could alleviate his distress.什么都不能减轻他的痛苦。
  • Please don't distress yourself.请你不要忧愁了。
3 transgress vqWyY     
vt.违反,逾越
参考例句:
  • Your words must't transgress the local laws .你的言辞不能违反当地法律。
  • No one is permitted to have privileges to transgress the law. 不允许任何人有超越法律的特权。
4 etiquette Xiyz0     
n.礼仪,礼节;规矩
参考例句:
  • The rules of etiquette are not so strict nowadays.如今的礼仪规则已不那么严格了。
  • According to etiquette,you should stand up to meet a guest.按照礼节你应该站起来接待客人。
5 omen N5jzY     
n.征兆,预兆;vt.预示
参考例句:
  • The superstitious regard it as a bad omen.迷信的人认为那是一种恶兆。
  • Could this at last be a good omen for peace?这是否终于可以视作和平的吉兆了?
6 defer KnYzZ     
vt.推迟,拖延;vi.(to)遵从,听从,服从
参考例句:
  • We wish to defer our decision until next week.我们希望推迟到下星期再作出决定。
  • We will defer to whatever the committee decides.我们遵从委员会作出的任何决定。
7 prosper iRrxC     
v.成功,兴隆,昌盛;使成功,使昌隆,繁荣
参考例句:
  • With her at the wheel,the company began to prosper.有了她当主管,公司开始兴旺起来。
  • It is my earnest wish that this company will continue to prosper.我真诚希望这家公司会继续兴旺发达。
8 nay unjzAQ     
adv.不;n.反对票,投反对票者
参考例句:
  • He was grateful for and proud of his son's remarkable,nay,unique performance.他为儿子出色的,不,应该是独一无二的表演心怀感激和骄傲。
  • Long essays,nay,whole books have been written on this.许多长篇大论的文章,不,应该说是整部整部的书都是关于这件事的。
9 lamentable A9yzi     
adj.令人惋惜的,悔恨的
参考例句:
  • This lamentable state of affairs lasted until 1947.这一令人遗憾的事态一直持续至1947年。
  • His practice of inebriation was lamentable.他的酗酒常闹得别人束手无策。
10 friendliness nsHz8c     
n.友谊,亲切,亲密
参考例句:
  • Behind the mask of friendliness,I know he really dislikes me.在友善的面具后面,我知道他其实并不喜欢我。
  • His manner was a blend of friendliness and respect.他的态度友善且毕恭毕敬。
11 hatred T5Gyg     
n.憎恶,憎恨,仇恨
参考例句:
  • He looked at me with hatred in his eyes.他以憎恨的眼光望着我。
  • The old man was seized with burning hatred for the fascists.老人对法西斯主义者充满了仇恨。
12 suspense 9rJw3     
n.(对可能发生的事)紧张感,担心,挂虑
参考例句:
  • The suspense was unbearable.这样提心吊胆的状况实在叫人受不了。
  • The director used ingenious devices to keep the audience in suspense.导演用巧妙手法引起观众的悬念。
13 spartans 20ddfa0d4a5efdeabf0d56a52a21151b     
n.斯巴达(spartan的复数形式)
参考例句:
  • The ancient Spartans used to expose babies that they did not want. 古斯巴达人常遗弃他们不要的婴儿。
  • But one by one the Spartans fell. 可是斯巴达人一个一个地倒下了。
14 hymn m4Wyw     
n.赞美诗,圣歌,颂歌
参考例句:
  • They sang a hymn of praise to God.他们唱着圣歌,赞美上帝。
  • The choir has sung only two verses of the last hymn.合唱团只唱了最后一首赞美诗的两个段落。
15 discretion FZQzm     
n.谨慎;随意处理
参考例句:
  • You must show discretion in choosing your friend.你择友时必须慎重。
  • Please use your best discretion to handle the matter.请慎重处理此事。
16 vouchsafed 07385734e61b0ea8035f27cf697b117a     
v.给予,赐予( vouchsafe的过去式和过去分词 );允诺
参考例句:
  • He vouchsafed to me certain family secrets. 他让我知道了某些家庭秘密。
  • The significance of the event does, indeed, seem vouchsafed. 这个事件看起来确实具有重大意义。 来自辞典例句
17 disciples e24b5e52634d7118146b7b4e56748cac     
n.信徒( disciple的名词复数 );门徒;耶稣的信徒;(尤指)耶稣十二门徒之一
参考例句:
  • Judas was one of the twelve disciples of Jesus. 犹大是耶稣十二门徒之一。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • "The names of the first two disciples were --" “最初的两个门徒的名字是——” 来自英汉文学 - 汤姆历险
18 blessings 52a399b218b9208cade790a26255db6b     
n.(上帝的)祝福( blessing的名词复数 );好事;福分;因祸得福
参考例句:
  • Afflictions are sometimes blessings in disguise. 塞翁失马,焉知非福。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • We don't rely on blessings from Heaven. 我们不靠老天保佑。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
19 plight 820zI     
n.困境,境况,誓约,艰难;vt.宣誓,保证,约定
参考例句:
  • The leader was much concerned over the plight of the refugees.那位领袖对难民的困境很担忧。
  • She was in a most helpless plight.她真不知如何是好。
20 trite Jplyt     
adj.陈腐的
参考例句:
  • The movie is teeming with obvious and trite ideas.这部电影充斥着平铺直叙的陈腐观点。
  • Yesterday,in the restaurant,Lorraine had seemed trite,blurred,worn away.昨天在饭店里,洛兰显得庸俗、堕落、衰老了。
21 enjoyment opaxV     
n.乐趣;享有;享用
参考例句:
  • Your company adds to the enjoyment of our visit. 有您的陪同,我们这次访问更加愉快了。
  • After each joke the old man cackled his enjoyment.每逢讲完一个笑话,这老人就呵呵笑着表示他的高兴。
22 pedantry IuTyz     
n.迂腐,卖弄学问
参考例句:
  • The book is a demonstration of scholarship without pedantry.这本书表现出学术水平又不故意卖弄学问。
  • He fell into a kind of pedantry.他变得有点喜欢卖弄学问。
23 anecdote 7wRzd     
n.轶事,趣闻,短故事
参考例句:
  • He departed from the text to tell an anecdote.他偏离课文讲起了一则轶事。
  • It had never been more than a family anecdote.那不过是个家庭趣谈罢了。
24 vicissitudes KeFzyd     
n.变迁,世事变化;变迁兴衰( vicissitude的名词复数 );盛衰兴废
参考例句:
  • He experienced several great social vicissitudes in his life. 他一生中经历了几次大的社会变迁。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • A man used to vicissitudes is not easily dejected. 饱经沧桑,不易沮丧。 来自《简明英汉词典》
25 simile zE0yB     
n.直喻,明喻
参考例句:
  • I believe this simile largely speaks the truth.我相信这种比拟在很大程度上道出了真实。
  • It is a trite simile to compare her teeth to pearls.把她的牙齿比做珍珠是陈腐的比喻。
26 auspiciously By7zh6     
adv.吉利; 繁荣昌盛; 前途顺利; 吉祥
参考例句:
  • He started his new job auspiciously on his birthday. 他在他生日那天找到了新工作,真是幸运。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • The year began auspiciously with good trade figures for January. 一月份贸易额可观,今年一开头就前景光明。 来自《简明英汉词典》
27 auspicious vu8zs     
adj.吉利的;幸运的,吉兆的
参考例句:
  • The publication of my first book was an auspicious beginning of my career.我的第一本书的出版是我事业吉祥的开始。
  • With favorable weather conditions it was an auspicious moment to set sail.风和日丽,正是扬帆出海的黄道吉日。
28 precept VPox5     
n.戒律;格言
参考例句:
  • It occurs to me that example is always more efficacious than precept.我想到身教重于言教。
  • The son had well profited by the precept and example of the father.老太爷的言传身教早已使他儿子获益无穷。
29 precedent sSlz6     
n.先例,前例;惯例;adj.在前的,在先的
参考例句:
  • Is there a precedent for what you want me to do?你要我做的事有前例可援吗?
  • This is a wonderful achievement without precedent in Chinese history.这是中国历史上亘古未有的奇绩。
30 deliberately Gulzvq     
adv.审慎地;蓄意地;故意地
参考例句:
  • The girl gave the show away deliberately.女孩故意泄露秘密。
  • They deliberately shifted off the argument.他们故意回避这个论点。
31 innovate p62xr     
v.革新,变革,创始
参考例句:
  • We must innovate in order to make progress.我们必须改革以便取得进步。
  • It is necessary to innovate and develop military theories.创新和发展军事理论是必要的。
32 audacity LepyV     
n.大胆,卤莽,无礼
参考例句:
  • He had the audacity to ask for an increase in salary.他竟然厚着脸皮要求增加薪水。
  • He had the audacity to pick pockets in broad daylight.他竟敢在光天化日之下掏包。
33 impudence K9Mxe     
n.厚颜无耻;冒失;无礼
参考例句:
  • His impudence provoked her into slapping his face.他的粗暴让她气愤地给了他一耳光。
  • What knocks me is his impudence.他的厚颜无耻使我感到吃惊。
34 acquitted c33644484a0fb8e16df9d1c2cd057cb0     
宣判…无罪( acquit的过去式和过去分词 ); 使(自己)作出某种表现
参考例句:
  • The jury acquitted him of murder. 陪审团裁决他谋杀罪不成立。
  • Five months ago she was acquitted on a shoplifting charge. 五个月前她被宣判未犯入店行窃罪。
35 maligned 91a025861c7f7c2ff4f544969b8f2084     
vt.污蔑,诽谤(malign的过去式与过去分词形式)
参考例句:
  • She feels she has been much maligned by the press. 她觉得她遭到了新闻界的恣意诽谤。
  • We maligned him dreadfully when you come to think of it. 回头想想,我们狠狠地中伤了他。 来自辞典例句
36 gratitude p6wyS     
adj.感激,感谢
参考例句:
  • I have expressed the depth of my gratitude to him.我向他表示了深切的谢意。
  • She could not help her tears of gratitude rolling down her face.她感激的泪珠禁不住沿着面颊流了下来。
37 majesty MAExL     
n.雄伟,壮丽,庄严,威严;最高权威,王权
参考例句:
  • The king had unspeakable majesty.国王有无法形容的威严。
  • Your Majesty must make up your mind quickly!尊贵的陛下,您必须赶快做出决定!
38 justify j3DxR     
vt.证明…正当(或有理),为…辩护
参考例句:
  • He tried to justify his absence with lame excuses.他想用站不住脚的借口为自己的缺席辩解。
  • Can you justify your rude behavior to me?你能向我证明你的粗野行为是有道理的吗?
39 peg p3Fzi     
n.木栓,木钉;vt.用木钉钉,用短桩固定
参考例句:
  • Hang your overcoat on the peg in the hall.把你的大衣挂在门厅的挂衣钩上。
  • He hit the peg mightily on the top with a mallet.他用木槌猛敲木栓顶。


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