The vulgar (as philosophers call the generality of mankind), implicitly9 taking as their text-book the fictions of Homer and Hesiod and other poets, assume the existence of a deep subterranean10 hole called Hades; spacious11, murky12, and sunless, but by some mysterious means sufficiently13 lighted to render all its details visible. Its king is a brother of Zeus, one Pluto; whose name — so an able philologer assures me — contains a complimentary15 allusion16 to his ghostly wealth. As to the nature of his government, and the condition of his subjects, the authority allotted17 to him extends over all the dead, who, from the moment that they come under his control, are kept in unbreakable fetters18; Shades are on no account permitted to return to Earth; to this rule there have been only two or three exceptions since the beginning of the world, and these were made for very urgent reasons. His realm is encompassed19 by vast rivers, whose very names inspire awe20: Cocytus, Pyriphlegethon, and the like. Most formidable of all, and first to arrest the progress of the new-comer, is Acheron, that lake which none may pass save by the ferryman’s boat; it is too deep to be waded21, too broad for the swimmer, and even defies the flight of birds deceased. At the very beginning of the descent is a gate of adamant22: here Aeacus, a nephew of the king, stands on guard. By his side is a three-headed dog, a grim brute23; to new arrivals, however, he is friendly enough, reserving his bark, and the yawning horror of his jaws24, for the would-be runaway25. On the inner shore of the lake is a meadow, wherein grows asphodel; here, too, is the fountain that makes war on memory, and is hence called Lethe. All these particulars the ancients would doubtless obtain from the Thessalian queen Alcestis and her fellow-countryman Protesilaus, from Theseus the son of Aegeus, and from the hero of the Odyssey26. These witnesses (whose evidence is entitled to our most respectful acceptance) did not, as I gather, drink of the waters of Lethe; because then they would not have remembered. According to them, the supreme27 power is entirely28 in the hands of Pluto and Persephone, who, however, are assisted in the labours of government by a host of underlings: such are the Furies, the Pains, the Fears; such too is Hermes, though he is not always in attendance. Judicial29 powers are vested in two satraps or viceroys, Minos and Rhadamanthus, both Cretans, and both sons of Zeus. By them all good and just men who have followed the precepts30 of virtue31 are sent off in large detachments to form colonies, as it were, in the Elysian Plain, and there to lead the perfect life. Evil-doers, on the contrary, are handed over to the Furies, who conduct them to the place of the wicked, where they are punished in due proportion to their iniquities32. What a variety of torments33 is there presented! The rack, the fire, the gnawing34 vulture; here Ixion spins upon his wheel, there Sisyphus rolls his stone. I have not forgotten Tantalus; but he stands elsewhere, stands parched35 on the Lake’s very brink36, like to die of thirst, poor wretch37! Then there is the numerous class of neutral characters; these wander about the meadow; formless phantoms38, that evade39 the touch like smoke. It seems that they depend for their nourishment40 upon the libations and victims offered by us upon their tombs; accordingly, a Shade who has no surviving friends or relations passes a hungry time of it in the lower world.
So profoundly have the common people been impressed with these doctrines41 that, when a man dies, the first act of his relations is to put a penny into his mouth, that he may have wherewithal to pay the ferryman: they do not stop to inquire what is the local currency, whether Attic42 or Macedonian or Aeginetan; nor does it occur to them how much better it would be for the departed one if the fare were not forthcoming — because then the ferryman would decline to take him, and he would be sent back into the living world. Lest the Stygian Lake should prove inadequate43 to the requirements of ghostly toilets, the corpse44 is next washed, anointed with the choicest unguents to arrest the progress of decay, crowned with fresh flowers, and laid out in sumptuous45 raiment; an obvious precaution, this last; it would not do for the deceased to take a chill on the journey, nor to exhibit himself to Cerberus with nothing on. Lamentation3 follows. The women wail46; men and women alike weep and beat their breasts and rend14 their hair and lacerate their cheeks; clothes are also torn on the occasion, and dust sprinkled on the head. The survivors47 are thus reduced to a more pitiable condition than the deceased: while they in all probability are rolling about and dashing their heads on the ground, he, bravely attired48 and gloriously garlanded, reposes49 gracefully50 upon his lofty bier, adorned51 as it were for some pageant52. The mother — nay53, it is the father, as likely as not — now advances from among the relatives, falls upon the bier (to heighten the dramatic effect, we will suppose its occupant to be young and handsome), and utters wild and meaningless ejaculations; the corpse cannot speak, otherwise it might have something to say in reply. His son — the father exclaims, with a mournful emphasis on every word — his beloved son is no more; he is gone; torn away before his hour was come, leaving him alone to mourn; he has never married, never begotten54 children, never been on the field of battle, never laid hand to the plough, never reached old age; never again will he make merry, never again know the joys of love, never, alas55! tipple56 at the convivial57 board among his comrades. And so on, and so on. He imagines his son to be still coveting58 these things, and coveting them in vain. But this is nothing: time after time men have been known to slaughter59 horses upon the tomb, and concubines and pages; to burn clothes and other finery, or bury it, in the idea that the deceased will find a profitable use for such things in the lower world. Now the afflicted60 senior, in delivering the tragic61 utterances62 I have suggested above, and others of the same kind, is not, as I understand it, consulting the interests of his son (who he knows will not hear him, though he shout louder than Stentor), nor yet his own; he is perfectly63 aware of his sentiments, and has no occasion to bellow64 them into his own ear. The natural conclusion is, that this tomfoolery is for the benefit of the spectators; and all the time he has not an idea where his son is, or what may be his condition; he cannot even have reflected upon human life generally, or he would know that the loss of it is no such great matter. Let us imagine that the son has obtained leave from Aeacus and Pluto to take a peep into the daylight, and put a stop to these parental65 maunderings. ‘Confound it, sir,’ he might exclaim, ‘what is the noise about? You bore me. Enough of hair-plucking and face-scratching. When you call me an ill-fated wretch, you abuse a better man than yourself, and a more fortunate. Why are you so sorry for me? Is it because I am not a bald, bent66, wrinkled old cripple like yourself? Is it because I have not lived to be a battered67 wreck68, nor seen a thousand moons wax and wane69, only to make a fool of myself at the last before a crowd? Can your sapience70 point to any single convenience of life, of which we are deprived in the lower world? I know what you will say: clothes and good dinners, wine and women, without which you think I shall be inconsolable. Are you now to learn that freedom from hunger and thirst is better than meat and drink, and insensibility to cold better than plenty of clothes? Come, I see you need enlightenment; I will show you how lamentation ought to be done. Make a fresh start, thus: Alas, my son! Hunger and thirst and cold are his no longer! He is gone, gone beyond the reach of sickness; he fears not fever any more, nor enemies nor tyrants71. Never again, my son, shall love disturb your peace, impair72 your health, make hourly inroads on your purse; oh, heavy change! Never can you reach contemptible73 old age, never be an eyesore to your juniors! — Confess, now, that my lamentation has the advantage of yours, in veracity74, as in absurdity75.
‘Perhaps it is the pitchy darkness of the infernal regions that runs in your head? is that the trouble? Are you afraid I shall be suffocated76 in the confinement77 of the tomb? You should reflect that my eyes will presently decay, or (if such is your good pleasure) be consumed with fire; after which I shall have no occasion to notice either light or darkness. However, let that pass. But all this lamentation, now; this fluting78 and beating of breasts; these wholly disproportionate wailings: how am I the better for it all? And what do I want with a garlanded column over my grave? And what good do you suppose you are going to do by pouring wine on it? do you expect it to filter through all the way to Hades? As to the victims, you must surely see for yourselves that all the solid nutriment is whisked away heavenwards in the form of smoke, leaving us Shades precisely79 as we were; the residue80, being dust, is useless; or is it your theory that Shades batten on ashes? Pluto’s realm is not so barren, nor asphodel so scarce with us, that we must apply to you for provisions. — What with this winding-sheet and these woollen bandages, my jaws have been effectually sealed up, or, by Tisiphone, I should have burst out laughing long before this at the stuff you talk and the things you do.’
And at the word Death sealed his lips for ever.
Thus far our corpse, leaning on one side, supported on an elbow. Can we doubt that he is in the right of it? And yet these simpletons, not content with their own noise, must call in professional assistance: an artist in grief, with a fine repertoire81 of cut-and-dried sorrows at his command, assumes the direction of this inane82 choir83, and supplies a theme for their woful acclamations. So far, all men are fools alike: but at this point national peculiarities84 make their appearance. The Greeks burn their dead, the Persians bury them; the Indian glazes85 the body, the Scythian eats it, the Egyptian embalms86 it. In Egypt, indeed, the corpse, duly dried, is actually placed at table — I have seen it done; and it is quite a common thing for an Egyptian to relieve himself from pecuniary87 embarrassment88 by a timely visit to the pawnbroker89, with his brother or father deceased. The childish futility90 of pyramids and mounds91 and columns, with their short-lived inscriptions92, is obvious. But some people go further, and attempt to plead the cause of the deceased with his infernal judges, or testify to his merits, by means of funeral games and laudatory93 epitaphs. The final absurdity is the funeral feast, at which the assembled relatives strive to console the parents, and to prevail upon them to take food; and, Heaven knows, they are willing enough to be persuaded, being almost prostrated94 by a three days’ fast. ‘How long is this to go on?’ some one expostulates. ‘Suffer the spirit of your departed saint to rest in peace. Or if mourn you will, then for that very reason you must eat, that your strength may be proportioned to your grief.’ At this point, a couple of lines of Homer go the round of the company:
Ev’n fair-haired Niobe forgat not food,
and
Not fasting mourn th’ Achaeans for their dead.
The parents are persuaded, though they go to work at first in a somewhat shamefaced manner; they do not want it to be thought that after their bereavement they are still subject to the infirmities of the flesh.
Such are some of the absurdities95 that may be observed in mourners; for I have by no means exhausted96 the list. And all springs from the vulgar error, that Death is the worst thing that can befall a man.
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1
bereavement
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| n.亲人丧亡，丧失亲人，丧亲之痛 | |
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consolation
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| n.安慰，慰问 | |
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lamentation
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| n.悲叹，哀悼 | |
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Pluto
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| n.冥王星 | |
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commiseration
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| n.怜悯，同情 | |
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bereaved
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| adj.刚刚丧失亲人的v.使失去（希望、生命等）( bereave的过去式和过去分词)；（尤指死亡）使丧失（亲人、朋友等）；使孤寂；抢走（财物） | |
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solely
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| adv.仅仅，唯一地 | |
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motives
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| n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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implicitly
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| adv. 含蓄地, 暗中地, 毫不保留地 | |
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subterranean
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| adj.地下的，地表下的 | |
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spacious
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| adj.广阔的，宽敞的 | |
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murky
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| adj.黑暗的，朦胧的；adv.阴暗地，混浊地；n.阴暗；昏暗 | |
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sufficiently
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| adv.足够地，充分地 | |
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rend
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| vt.把…撕开，割裂；把…揪下来，强行夺取 | |
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complimentary
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| adj.赠送的，免费的，赞美的，恭维的 | |
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allusion
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| n.暗示，间接提示 | |
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allotted
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| 分配，拨给，摊派( allot的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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fetters
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| n.脚镣( fetter的名词复数 )；束缚v.给…上脚镣，束缚( fetter的第三人称单数 ) | |
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encompassed
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| v.围绕( encompass的过去式和过去分词 )；包围；包含；包括 | |
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awe
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| n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧 | |
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waded
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| （从水、泥等）蹚，走过，跋( wade的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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adamant
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| adj.坚硬的，固执的 | |
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brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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jaws
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| n.口部；嘴 | |
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runaway
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| n.逃走的人，逃亡，亡命者；adj.逃亡的，逃走的 | |
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odyssey
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| n.长途冒险旅行；一连串的冒险 | |
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supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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judicial
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| adj.司法的，法庭的，审判的，明断的，公正的 | |
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precepts
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| n.规诫，戒律，箴言( precept的名词复数 ) | |
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virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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iniquities
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| n.邪恶( iniquity的名词复数 )；极不公正 | |
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torments
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| （肉体或精神上的）折磨，痛苦( torment的名词复数 )； 造成痛苦的事物[人] | |
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gnawing
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| a.痛苦的，折磨人的 | |
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parched
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| adj.焦干的；极渴的；v.（使）焦干 | |
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brink
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| n.(悬崖、河流等的)边缘，边沿 | |
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wretch
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| n.可怜的人，不幸的人；卑鄙的人 | |
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phantoms
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| n.鬼怪，幽灵( phantom的名词复数 ) | |
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39
evade
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| vt.逃避，回避；避开，躲避 | |
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40
nourishment
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| n.食物，营养品；营养情况 | |
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doctrines
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| n.教条( doctrine的名词复数 )；教义；学说；（政府政策的）正式声明 | |
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attic
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| n.顶楼，屋顶室 | |
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inadequate
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| adj.(for,to)不充足的，不适当的 | |
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corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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sumptuous
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| adj.豪华的，奢侈的，华丽的 | |
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46
wail
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| vt./vi.大声哀号，恸哭；呼啸，尖啸 | |
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47
survivors
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| 幸存者，残存者，生还者( survivor的名词复数 ) | |
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48
attired
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| adj.穿着整齐的v.使穿上衣服，使穿上盛装( attire的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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49
reposes
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| v.将（手臂等）靠在某人（某物）上( repose的第三人称单数 ) | |
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gracefully
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| ad.大大方方地；优美地 | |
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adorned
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| [计]被修饰的 | |
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52
pageant
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| n.壮观的游行；露天历史剧 | |
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53
nay
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| adv.不；n.反对票，投反对票者 | |
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begotten
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| v.为…之生父( beget的过去分词 )；产生，引起 | |
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alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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tipple
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| n.常喝的酒；v.不断喝，饮烈酒 | |
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convivial
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| adj.狂欢的，欢乐的 | |
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coveting
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| v.贪求，觊觎( covet的现在分词 ) | |
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slaughter
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| n.屠杀，屠宰；vt.屠杀，宰杀 | |
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afflicted
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| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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utterances
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| n.发声( utterance的名词复数 )；说话方式；语调；言论 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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bellow
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| v.吼叫，怒吼；大声发出，大声喝道 | |
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parental
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| adj.父母的；父的；母的 | |
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bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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battered
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| adj.磨损的；v.连续猛击；磨损 | |
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wreck
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| n.失事，遇难；沉船；vt.(船等)失事，遇难 | |
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wane
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| n.衰微，亏缺，变弱；v.变小，亏缺，呈下弦 | |
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sapience
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| n.贤明，睿智 | |
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tyrants
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| 专制统治者( tyrant的名词复数 )； 暴君似的人； （古希腊的）僭主； 严酷的事物 | |
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impair
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| v.损害，损伤；削弱，减少 | |
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contemptible
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| adj.可鄙的，可轻视的，卑劣的 | |
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veracity
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| n.诚实 | |
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absurdity
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| n.荒谬，愚蠢；谬论 | |
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suffocated
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| （使某人）窒息而死( suffocate的过去式和过去分词 )； （将某人）闷死； 让人感觉闷热； 憋气 | |
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confinement
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| n.幽禁，拘留，监禁；分娩；限制，局限 | |
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fluting
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| 有沟槽的衣料； 吹笛子； 笛声； 刻凹槽 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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residue
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| n.残余，剩余，残渣 | |
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repertoire
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| n.(准备好演出的)节目，保留剧目；(计算机的)指令表，指令系统， <美>(某个人的)全部技能；清单，指令表 | |
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inane
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| adj.空虚的，愚蠢的，空洞的 | |
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choir
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| n.唱诗班，唱诗班的席位，合唱团，舞蹈团；v.合唱 | |
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84
peculiarities
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| n. 特质, 特性, 怪癖, 古怪 | |
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85
glazes
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| n.上釉的表面( glaze的名词复数 )；釉料；（浇在糕点上增加光泽的）蛋浆v.装玻璃( glaze的第三人称单数 )；上釉于，上光；（目光）变得呆滞无神 | |
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86
embalms
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| n.保存（尸体）不腐( embalm的名词复数 )；使不被遗忘；使充满香气v.保存（尸体）不腐( embalm的第三人称单数 )；使不被遗忘；使充满香气 | |
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87
pecuniary
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| adj.金钱的；金钱上的 | |
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88
embarrassment
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| n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫 | |
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89
pawnbroker
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| n.典当商，当铺老板 | |
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90
futility
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| n.无用 | |
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91
mounds
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| 土堆，土丘( mound的名词复数 )； 一大堆 | |
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92
inscriptions
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| （作者）题词( inscription的名词复数 )； 献词； 碑文； 证劵持有人的登记 | |
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93
laudatory
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| adj.赞扬的 | |
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94
prostrated
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| v.使俯伏，使拜倒( prostrate的过去式和过去分词 )；（指疾病、天气等）使某人无能为力 | |
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95
absurdities
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| n.极端无理性( absurdity的名词复数 )；荒谬；谬论；荒谬的行为 | |
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exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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