Brentford, tedious town,
For dirty streets and white-legged chickens known.
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Image unavailable: BRENTFORD.
BRENTFORD.
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‘BRENTFORD, TEDIOUS TOWN’
Now, if Brentford is certainly not tedious nowadays, it is unquestionably as dirty as ever. If you would know the true, poignant3, inner meaning of tediousness, you must make acquaintance, say, with Gower Street on a winter’s day; a typical street of suburban4 villas5, each ‘villa’ as like its neighbour as one new sixpence is to another; or the Cromwell Road at any time or under any conditions. Then you will have known tedium6. At Brentford, however, all is life, movement, dirt, and balmy odours from a quarter of a mile of roadside gasworks. The bargees and lightermen of this riverside town are swearing picturesquely8 at one another all day, while the gasmen, the hands at the waterworks, and the railwaymen join in occasionally. Sometimes the profanity so cheerfully bandied about leads to a fight, but not often, because when a bargee addresses his dearest friend by a string of epithets9 that might make a typical old-time stage-manager blush, it is all taken as a token of friendship. These are the shibboleths10 of the place.
When, however, Gay alludes11 to the ‘white-legged chickens,’ for which, he says, Brentford was known, we are at a loss to identify the breed. That kind of chicken must long since have given up the attempt to be white-legged, and have changed, by process of evolution, into some less easily soiled variety. For the dirt of Brentford is always there. It only varies in kind. In times of drought it makes itself obvious in clouds of black dust, composed of powdered coals and clinkers; and when a day of rain has laid this plague, it is forthwith re-incarnated in the shape of{60} seas of oily black mud. The poet Thomson might have written yesterday—
E’en so, through Brentford town, a town of mud;
while Dr. Johnson adds his weighty testimony12, for when a contemporary, a native of Glasgow, was praising Glasgow to him, the Doctor cut his eloquence13 with the query14: ‘Pray, sir, have you ever seen Brentford?’ Here was sarcasm15 indeed! Happily, however, the Glaswegian had not seen Brentford, and so was not in a position to appreciate the retort. But Boswell, who, ubiquitous man, was of course present, knew, and told the Doctor this was shocking. ‘Why, then, sir,’ rejoined Johnson, ‘you have never seen Brentford!’
Then, when we have all this delightful16 testimony as to Brentford’s dirt, comes Shenstone, the melancholy17 poet who ‘found his warmest welcome at an inn,’ to testify as to the character of its inhabitants. ‘No persons,’ says he, ‘more solicitous18 about the preservation19 of rank than those who have no rank at all. Observe the humours of a country christening; and you will find no court in Christendom so ceremonious as “the quality” of Brentford.’
ODD STREET-NAMES
Despite these criticisms, it must be acknowledged that Brentford is a town of high interest. Its filthy20 gasworks, its waterworks, its docks have not sufficed to sweep away the old-fashioned appearance of the place. It may, in fact, be safely said that no other such truly picturesque7 town as Brentford exists near London. This will not long remain true of it, for, even now, new buildings are here and there taking{61} the place of the old. For one thing, Brentford has a quite remarkable21 number of old inns, and the great stableyards and courtyards of other old coaching hostelries which themselves have disappeared. This was, in fact, the end of the first stage out of London in the coaching era, and the beginning of the last stage in; and in consequence, as befitted a town on the great highway to the West, had ample accommodation, both for man and beast. One of these old yards, indeed,—Red Lion Inn Yard—is historic, for it is traditionally the spot where Edmund Ironside, the king, was murdered by the Danes in 1016, after he had defeated them here. The most famous, however, of all the Brentford inns, the Three Pigeons, was brutally22 demolished23 many years ago, although it had associations with Shakespeare and ‘rare’ Ben Jonson. The ‘Tumbledown Dick,’ another vanished hostelry, whose sign was a satire24 on the nerveless rule and swift overthrow25 of the Protector’s son, Richard Cromwell, was a well-known house; while the names of some of the old yards—Green Dragon Yard and Catherine Wheel Yard—are reminiscent of once-popular signs.
Then Brentford has the queerest of street names. What think you of ‘Half Acre’ for the style and title of a thoroughfare? or ‘Town Meadow,’ which is less a meadow than a slum? Then there are ‘The Butts,’ with some fine, dignified26 Queen Anne and Georgian red-brick houses, situated27 in a quiet spot behind the High Street; and ‘The Hollows,’ a thoroughfare hollow no longer, if ever it was.
Fronting on to the High Street is the broad and{62} massive old stone tower of St. Lawrence’s Church, the parish church of the so-called ‘New’ Brentford, itself old beyond compute28. The tower dates back four hundred years or so, but the body of the church was rebuilt in Georgian days and is very like, and only a little less hideous29 than, the gasworks up the street.
SION
An extraordinary story is told by Cyrus Redding, in his Fifty Years’ Recollections, of a countryman’s adventures in London just before the introduction of railways. The adventures began at Brentford: ‘I had a relative,’ he says, ‘who, on stating his intention to come up to town, was solicited30 to accept as his fellow-traveller a man of property, a neighbour, who had never been thirty miles from home in his life. They travelled by coach. All went well till they reached Brentford, where the countryman supposed he was nearly come to his journey’s end. On seeing the lamps mile after mile, he expressed more and more impatience31, exclaiming, “Are we not yet in London, and so many miles of lamps?” At length, on reaching Hyde Park Corner, he was told they had arrived. His impatience increased from thence to Lad Lane. He became overwhelmed with astonishment32, They entered the “Swan with Two Necks,” and my relative bade his companion remain in the coffee-room until he returned. On returning, he found the bird flown, and for six long weeks there were no tidings of him. At length it was discovered that he was in the custody33 of the constables34 at Sherborne in Dorsetshire, his mind alienated35. He was conveyed home, came partially36 to his reason for a{63} short time, and died. It was gathered from him that he had become more and more confused at the lights and the long distances he was carried among them; it seemed as if they could have no end. The idea that he could never be extricated37 from such a labyrinth38 superseded39 every other. He could not bear the thought. He went into the street, inquired his way westward40, and seemed to have got into Hyde Park, and then out again into the Great Western Road, walking until he could walk no longer. He could relate nothing more that occurred until he was secured. Neither his watch nor money had been taken from him.’
The country-folks who now journey up to town do not behave in this extraordinary fashion on coming to the infinitely41 greater and more distracting London of to-day.
At the western end of Brentford, just removed from its muddy streets, is Sion, the Duke of Northumberland’s suburban residence. The great square embattled stone house stands in the midst of the park, screened from observation from the road by great clusters of forest trees. Through the ornamental42 classic stone screen and iron gateway43, erected44 in the well-known ‘Adam style’ by John Adam about 1780, the green sward may be glimpsed; the fresher and more beautiful by contrast with the dusty highroad. Above the arched stone entrance stands the Percy Lion, statant, as heralds45 would say, with tail extended.
Sion is well named, for no fairer scene can be imagined than this in the long days of summer, when the lovely gardens are at their best and the Thames{64} flows by the park with glittering golden ripples46. The Daughters of Sion, whose religious retreat this was, belonged to the Order of St. Bridget. Their abbey, with its lands and great revenues, was suppressed and confiscated47 by Henry the Eighth in 1532. Nine years later his Queen, Katherine Howard, was imprisoned48 within the desecrated49 walls before being handed over to the headsman, and in another seven years the body of the King himself lay here a night on its journey to Windsor. There is a horrid50 story that tells how the unwieldy corpse51 of the bloated royal monster burst, and how the dogs drank his blood.
In the reign52 of his daughter, Queen Mary, Sion enjoyed a few years’ restitution53 of its rights and property, but when Elizabeth ascended54 the throne, the ‘Daughters’ were finally dispossessed. They wandered to Flanders, and thence, by devious55 ways, and with many hardships, eventually to Lisbon. The Abbey of Sion yet exists there, and the sisters are still solely56 Englishwomen. It is on record that they still cherish the hope of returning to their lost home by the banks of the Thames, and have to this day the keys of that abbey. Seventy years or so since, the then Duke of Northumberland, travelling in Portugal, called upon them, and was told of this fond belief. They even showed him the keys. But he was equal to the occasion, and cynically57 remarked that the locks had been altered since those days!
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1
renounce
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| v.放弃；拒绝承认，宣布与…断绝关系 | |
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jot
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| n.少量；vi.草草记下；vt.匆匆写下 | |
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3
poignant
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| adj.令人痛苦的，辛酸的，惨痛的 | |
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suburban
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| adj.城郊的，在郊区的 | |
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villas
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| 别墅，公馆( villa的名词复数 )； （城郊）住宅 | |
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6
tedium
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| n.单调；烦闷 | |
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7
picturesque
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| adj.美丽如画的，（语言）生动的，绘声绘色的 | |
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8
picturesquely
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9
epithets
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| n.（表示性质、特征等的）词语( epithet的名词复数 ) | |
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10
shibboleths
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| n.（党派、集团等的）准则( shibboleth的名词复数 )；教条；用语；行话 | |
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11
alludes
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| 提及，暗指( allude的第三人称单数 ) | |
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12
testimony
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| n.证词；见证，证明 | |
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13
eloquence
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| n.雄辩；口才，修辞 | |
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14
query
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| n.疑问，问号，质问；vt.询问，表示怀疑 | |
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15
sarcasm
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| n.讥讽，讽刺，嘲弄，反话 （adj.sarcastic） | |
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16
delightful
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| adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的 | |
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17
melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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18
solicitous
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| adj.热切的，挂念的 | |
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19
preservation
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| n.保护，维护，保存，保留，保持 | |
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20
filthy
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| adj.卑劣的；恶劣的，肮脏的 | |
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21
remarkable
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| adj.显著的，异常的，非凡的，值得注意的 | |
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22
brutally
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| adv.残忍地，野蛮地，冷酷无情地 | |
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23
demolished
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| v.摧毁( demolish的过去式和过去分词 )；推翻；拆毁（尤指大建筑物）；吃光 | |
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24
satire
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| n.讽刺，讽刺文学，讽刺作品 | |
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25
overthrow
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| v.推翻，打倒，颠覆；n.推翻，瓦解，颠覆 | |
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26
dignified
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| a.可敬的，高贵的 | |
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27
situated
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| adj.坐落在...的，处于某种境地的 | |
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28
compute
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| v./n.计算，估计 | |
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29
hideous
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| adj.丑陋的，可憎的，可怕的，恐怖的 | |
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30
solicited
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| v.恳求( solicit的过去式和过去分词 )；（指娼妇）拉客；索求；征求 | |
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31
impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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32
astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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33
custody
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| n.监护，照看，羁押，拘留 | |
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34
constables
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| n.警察( constable的名词复数 ) | |
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35
alienated
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| adj.感到孤独的，不合群的v.使疏远( alienate的过去式和过去分词 )；使不友好；转让；让渡（财产等） | |
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36
partially
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| adv.部分地，从某些方面讲 | |
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37
extricated
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| v.使摆脱困难，脱身( extricate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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38
labyrinth
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| n.迷宫；难解的事物；迷路 | |
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39
superseded
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| [医]被代替的，废弃的 | |
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40
westward
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| n.西方，西部；adj.西方的，向西的；adv.向西 | |
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41
infinitely
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| adv.无限地，无穷地 | |
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42
ornamental
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| adj.装饰的；作装饰用的；n.装饰品；观赏植物 | |
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43
gateway
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| n.大门口，出入口，途径，方法 | |
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44
ERECTED
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| adj. 直立的，竖立的，笔直的 vt. 使 ... 直立，建立 | |
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45
heralds
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| n.使者( herald的名词复数 )；预报者；预兆；传令官v.预示( herald的第三人称单数 )；宣布（好或重要） | |
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46
ripples
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| 逐渐扩散的感觉( ripple的名词复数 ) | |
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47
confiscated
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| 没收，充公( confiscate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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48
imprisoned
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| 下狱，监禁( imprison的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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49
desecrated
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| 毁坏或亵渎( desecrate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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50
horrid
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| adj.可怕的；令人惊恐的；恐怖的；极讨厌的 | |
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51
corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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52
reign
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| n.统治时期，统治，支配，盛行；v.占优势 | |
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53
restitution
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| n.赔偿；恢复原状 | |
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54
ascended
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| v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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55
devious
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| adj.不坦率的，狡猾的；迂回的，曲折的 | |
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56
solely
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| adv.仅仅，唯一地 | |
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57
cynically
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| adv.爱嘲笑地，冷笑地 | |
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