Justine (1957) Part IV Chapter 3

In the early summer I received a long letter from Clea with which this brief introductory memorial to Alexandria may well be brought to a close. ‘You may perhaps be interested in my account of a brief meeting with Justine a few weeks ago. We had, as you know, been exchanging occasional cards from our respective countries for some time past, and hearing that I was due to pass through Palestine into Syria she herself suggested a brief meeting. She would come, she said, to the border station where the Haifa train waits for half an hour. The settlement in which she works is somewhere near at hand, she could get a lift. We might talk for a while on the platform. To this I agreed. ‘At first I had some difficulty in recognizing her. She has gone a good deal fatter in the face and has chopped off her hair carelessly at the back so that it sticks out in rats’ tails. I gather that for the most part she wears it done up in a cloth. No trace remains¹ of the old elegance² or chic³. Her features seem to have broadened, become more classically Jewish, lip and nose inclining more towards each other. I was shocked at first by the glittering eyes and the quick incisive⁴ way of breathing and talking — as if she were feverish⁵ As you can imagine we were both mortally shy of each other. ‘We walked out of the station along the road and sat down on the edge of a dry ravine, a wadi, with a few terrified-looking spring flowers about our feet. She gave the impression of already having chosen this place for our interview: perhaps as suitably austere⁶. I don’t know. She did not mention Nessim or you at first but spoke⁷ only about her new life. She had achieved, she claimed, a new and perfect happiness through “community-service”; the air with which she said this suggested some sort of religious conversion⁸. Do not smile. It is hard, I know, to be patient with the weak. In all the back-breaking sweat of the Communist settlement she claimed to have achieved a “new humility”. (Humility! The last trap that awaits the ego⁹ in search of absolute truth. I felt disgusted but said nothing.) She described the work of the settlement coarsely, unimaginatively, as a peasant might. I noticed that those once finely-tended hands were calloused¹⁰ and rough. I suppose people have a right to dispose of their bodies as they think fit, I said to myself, feeling ashamed because I must be radiating cleanliness and leisure, good food and baths. By the way, she is not a Marxist as yet — simply a work-mystic after the manner of Panayotis at Abousir. Watching her now and remembering the touching¹¹ and tormenting¹² person she had once been for us all I found it hard to comprehend the change into this tubby little peasant with the hard paws. ‘I suppose events are simply a sort of annotation¹³ of our feelings — the one might be deduced from the other. Time carries us (boldly imagining that we are discrete¹⁴ egos¹⁵ modelling our own personal futures) — time carries us forward by the momentum¹⁶ of those feelings inside us of which we ourselves are least conscious. Too abstract for you? Then I have expressed the idea badly. I mean, in Justine’s case, having become cured of the mental aberrations¹⁷ brought about by her dreams, her fears, she has been deflated¹⁸ like a bag. For so long the fantasy occupied the foreground of her life that now she is dispossessed of her entire stock-in-trade. It is not only that the death of Capodistria has removed the chief actor in this shadow-play, her chief gaoler. The illness itself had kept her on the move, and when it died it left in its place total exhaustion¹⁹. She has, so to speak, extinguished with, her sexuality her very claims on life, almost her reason. People driven like this to the very boundaries of freewill are forced to turn somewhere for help, to make absolute decisions. If she had not been an Alexandrian (i.e. sceptic) this would have taken the form of religious conversion. How is one to say these things? It is not a question of growing to be happy or unhappy. A whole block of one’s life suddenly falls into the sea, as perhaps yours did with Melissa. But (this is how it works in life, the retributive law which brings good for evil and evil for good) her own release also released Nessim from the inhibitions governing his passional life. I think he always felt that so long as Justine lived he would never be able to endure the slightest human relationship with anyone else. Melissa proved him wrong, or at least so he thought; but with Justine’s departure the old heartsickness cropped up and he was filled with overwhelming disgust for what he had done to her — to Melissa. ‘Lovers are never equally matched — do you think? One always overshadows the other and stunts²⁰ his or her growth so that the overshadowed one must always be tormented²¹ by a desire to escape, to be free to grow. Surely this is the only tragic²² thing about love? ‘So that if from another point of view Nessim did plan Capodistria’s death (as has been widely rumoured²³ and believed) he could not have chosen a more calamitous²⁴ path. It would indeed have been wiser to kill you. Perhaps he hoped in releasing Justine from the succubus (as Arnauti before him) he would free her for himself. (He said so once — you told me.) But quite the opposite has happened. He has granted her a sort of absolution, or poor Capodistria unwittingly did — with the result that she thinks of him now not as a lover but as a sort of arch-priest. She speaks of him with a reverence²⁵ which would horrify²⁶ him to hear. She will never go back, how could she? And if she did he would know at once that he had lost her forever — for those who stand in a confessional relationship to ourselves can never love us, never truly love us. ‘(Of you Justine said simply, with a slight shrug²⁷: “I had to put him out of my mind”.) ‘Well, these are some of the thoughts that passed through my mind as the train carried me down through the orange groves²⁸ to the coast; they were thrown into sharp relief by the book I had chosen to read on the journey, the penultimate volume of God is a Humorist. How greatly Pursewarden has gained in stature²⁹ since his death! It was before as if he stood between his own books and our understanding of them. I see now that what we found enigmatic about the man was due to a fault in ourselves. An artist does not live a personal life as we do, he hides it, forcing us to go to his books if we wish to touch the true source of his feelings. Underneath³⁰ all his preoccupations with sex, society, religion, etc. (all the staple³¹ abstractions which allow the forebrain to chatter) there is, quite simply, a man tortured beyond endurance by the lack of tenderness in the world. ‘And all this brings me back to myself, for I too have been changing in some curious way. The old self-sufficient life has transformed itself into something a little hollow, a little empty. It no longer answers my deepest needs. Somewhere deep inside a tide seems to have turned in my nature. I do not know why but it is towards you, my dear friend, that my thoughts have turned more and more of late. Can one be frank? Is there a friendship possible this side of love which could be sought and found? I speak no more of love — the word and its conventions have become odious³² to me. But is there a friendship possible to attain³³ which is deeper, even limitlessly deep, and yet wordless, idealess? It seems somehow necessary to find a human being to whom one can be faithful, not in the body (I leave that to the priests) but in the culprit mind? But perhaps this is not the sort of problem which will interest you much these days. Once or twice I have felt the absurd desire to come to you and offer my services in looking after the child perhaps. But it seems clear now that you do not really need anybody any more, and that you value your solitude³⁴ above all things….’ There are a few more lines and then the affectionate superscription.

 ***** The cicadas are throbbing³⁵ in the great planes, and the summer Mediterranean³⁶ lies before me in all its magnetic blueness. Somewhere out there, beyond the mauve throbbing line of the horizon lies Africa, lies Alexandria, maintaining its tenuous³⁷ grasp on one’s affections through memories which are already refunding³⁸ themselves slowly into forgetfulness; memory of friends, of incidents long past. The slow unreality of time begins to grip them, blurring³⁹ the outlines — so that sometimes I wonder whether these pages record the actions of real human beings; or whether this is not simply the story of a few inanimate objects which precipitated⁴⁰ drama around them — I mean a black patch, a watch-key and a couple of dispossessed wedding-rings…. Soon it will be evening and the clear night sky will be dusted thickly with summer stars. I shall be here, as always, smoking by the water. I have decided⁴¹ to leave Clea’s last letter unanswered. I no longer wish to coerce⁴² anyone, to make promises, to think of life in terms of compacts, resolutions, covenants⁴³. It will be up to Clea to interpret my silence according to her own needs and desires, to come to me if she has need or not, as the case may be. Does not everything* depend on our interpretation⁴⁴ of the silence around us? So that…

1 remains   

n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹

参考例句：

• He ate the remains of food hungrily.他狼吞虎咽地吃剩余的食物。
• The remains of the meal were fed to the dog.残羹剩饭喂狗了。

2 elegance   

n.优雅；优美，雅致；精致，巧妙

参考例句：

• The furnishings in the room imparted an air of elegance.这个房间的家具带给这房间一种优雅的气氛。
• John has been known for his sartorial elegance.约翰因为衣着讲究而出名。

3 chic   

n./adj.别致(的)，时髦(的)，讲究的

参考例句：

• She bought a chic little hat.她买了一顶别致的小帽子。
• The chic restaurant is patronized by many celebrities.这家时髦的饭店常有名人光顾。

4 incisive   

adj.敏锐的，机敏的，锋利的，切入的

参考例句：

• His incisive remarks made us see the problems in our plans.他的话切中要害，使我们看到了计划中的一些问题。
• He combined curious qualities of naivety with incisive wit and worldly sophistication.他集天真质朴的好奇、锐利的机智和老练的世故于一体。

5 feverish   

adj.发烧的，狂热的，兴奋的

参考例句：

• He is too feverish to rest.他兴奋得安静不下来。
• They worked with feverish haste to finish the job.为了完成此事他们以狂热的速度工作着。

6 austere   

adj.艰苦的；朴素的，朴实无华的；严峻的

参考例句：

• His way of life is rather austere.他的生活方式相当简朴。
• The room was furnished in austere style.这间屋子的陈设都很简单朴素。

7 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

8 conversion   

n.转化，转换，转变

参考例句：

• He underwent quite a conversion.他彻底变了。
• Waste conversion is a part of the production process.废物处理是生产过程的一个组成部分。

9 ego   

n.自我，自己，自尊

参考例句：

• He is absolute ego in all thing.在所有的事情上他都绝对自我。
• She has been on an ego trip since she sang on television.她上电视台唱过歌之后就一直自吹自擂。

10 calloused   

adj.粗糙的，粗硬的，起老茧的v.（使）硬结，（使）起茧( callous的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）冷酷无情

参考例句：

• A most practical and emotionally calloused Youth interrupted. 一个非常讲究实际而心肠很硬的年轻人插了一嘴。 来自辞典例句
• McTeague exhibited his hard, calloused palms. 麦克梯格摊开那双生满老茧坚硬的手掌。 来自辞典例句

11 touching   

adj.动人的，使人感伤的

参考例句：

• It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
• His letter was touching.他的信很感人。

12 tormenting   

使痛苦的，使苦恼的

参考例句：

• He took too much pleasure in tormenting an ugly monster called Caliban. 他喜欢一味捉弄一个名叫凯列班的丑妖怪。
• The children were scolded for tormenting animals. 孩子们因折磨动物而受到责骂。

13 annotation   

n.注解

参考例句：

• She retained a number of copies for further annotation.她保留了许多副本以便作进一步的注解。
• He supplied annotations to nearly 15,000 musical works.他给近1.5万部音乐作品作过注解。

14 discrete   

adj.个别的，分离的，不连续的

参考例句：

• The picture consists of a lot of discrete spots of colour.这幅画由许多不相连的色点组成。
• Most staple fibers are discrete,individual entities.大多数短纤维是不联系的单独实体。

15 egos   

自我，自尊，自负( ego的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Their egos are so easily bruised. 他们的自尊心很容易受到伤害。
• The belief in it issues from the puerile egos of inferior men. 这种信仰是下等人幼稚的自私意识中产生的。

16 momentum   

n.动力，冲力，势头；动量

参考例句：

• We exploit the energy and momentum conservation laws in this way.我们就是这样利用能量和动量守恒定律的。
• The law of momentum conservation could supplant Newton's third law.动量守恒定律可以取代牛顿第三定律。

17 aberrations   

n.偏差( aberration的名词复数 )；差错；脱离常规；心理失常

参考例句：

• These events were aberrations from the norm. 这些事件不合常规。 来自辞典例句
• These chromosome aberrations are all stable, compatible with cell viability. 这些染色体畸变都是稳定的，不影响细胞生活力的。 来自辞典例句

18 deflated   

adj. 灰心丧气的

参考例句：

• I was quite deflated by her lack of interest in my suggestions.他对我的建议兴趣不大，令我感到十分气馁。
• He was deflated by the news.这消息令他泄气。

19 exhaustion   

n.耗尽枯竭，疲惫，筋疲力尽，竭尽，详尽无遗的论述

参考例句：

• She slept the sleep of exhaustion.她因疲劳而酣睡。
• His exhaustion was obvious when he fell asleep standing.他站着睡着了，显然是太累了。

20 stunts   

n.惊人的表演( stunt的名词复数 )；（广告中）引人注目的花招；愚蠢行为；危险举动v.阻碍…发育[生长]，抑制，妨碍( stunt的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• He did all his own stunts. 所有特技都是他自己演的。
• The plane did a few stunts before landing. 飞机着陆前做了一些特技。 来自《简明英汉词典》

21 tormented   

饱受折磨的

参考例句：

• The knowledge of his guilt tormented him. 知道了自己的罪责使他非常痛苦。
• He had lain awake all night, tormented by jealousy. 他彻夜未眠，深受嫉妒的折磨。

22 tragic   

adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的

参考例句：

• The effect of the pollution on the beaches is absolutely tragic.污染海滩后果可悲。
• Charles was a man doomed to tragic issues.查理是个注定不得善终的人。

23 rumoured   

adj.谣传的；传说的；风

参考例句：

• It has been so rumoured here. 此间已有传闻。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• It began to be rumoured that the jury would be out a long while. 有人传说陪审团要退场很久。 来自英汉文学 - 双城记

24 calamitous   

adj.灾难的，悲惨的；多灾多难；惨重

参考例句：

• We are exposed to the most calamitous accidents. 我们遭受着极大的灾难。 来自辞典例句
• Light reveals the subtle alteration of things, the sly or calamitous impermanence or mortal life. 事物的细微变动，人生的狡猾，倏忽无常，一一都在光中显露出来。 来自辞典例句

25 reverence   

n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬

参考例句：

• He was a bishop who was held in reverence by all.他是一位被大家都尊敬的主教。
• We reverence tradition but will not be fettered by it.我们尊重传统，但不被传统所束缚。

26 horrify   

vt.使恐怖，使恐惧，使惊骇

参考例句：

• His family were horrified by the change.他的家人对这一变化感到震惊。
• When I saw these figures I was horrified.我看到这些数字时无比惊骇。

27 shrug   

v.耸肩(表示怀疑、冷漠、不知等)

参考例句：

• With a shrug,he went out of the room.他耸一下肩，走出了房间。
• I admire the way she is able to shrug off unfair criticism.我很佩服她能对错误的批评意见不予理会。

28 groves   

树丛，小树林( grove的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The early sun shone serenely on embrowned groves and still green fields. 朝阳宁静地照耀着已经发黄的树丛和还是一片绿色的田地。
• The trees grew more and more in groves and dotted with old yews. 那里的树木越来越多地长成了一簇簇的小丛林，还点缀着几棵老紫杉树。

29 stature   

n.（高度）水平，（高度）境界，身高，身材

参考例句：

• He is five feet five inches in stature.他身高5英尺5英寸。
• The dress models are tall of stature.时装模特儿的身材都较高。

30 underneath   

adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面

参考例句：

• Working underneath the car is always a messy job.在汽车底下工作是件脏活。
• She wore a coat with a dress underneath.她穿着一件大衣，里面套着一条连衣裙。

31 staple   

n.主要产物，常用品，主要要素，原料，订书钉，钩环；adj.主要的，重要的；vt.分类

参考例句：

• Tea is the staple crop here.本地产品以茶叶为大宗。
• Potatoes are the staple of their diet.土豆是他们的主要食品。

32 odious   

adj.可憎的，讨厌的

参考例句：

• The judge described the crime as odious.法官称这一罪行令人发指。
• His character could best be described as odious.他的人格用可憎来形容最贴切。

33 attain   

vt.达到，获得，完成

参考例句：

• I used the scientific method to attain this end. 我用科学的方法来达到这一目的。
• His painstaking to attain his goal in life is praiseworthy. 他为实现人生目标所下的苦功是值得称赞的。

34 solitude   

n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方

参考例句：

• People need a chance to reflect on spiritual matters in solitude. 人们需要独处的机会来反思精神上的事情。
• They searched for a place where they could live in solitude. 他们寻找一个可以过隐居生活的地方。

35 throbbing   

a. 跳动的,悸动的

参考例句：

• My heart is throbbing and I'm shaking. 我的心在猛烈跳动，身子在不住颤抖。
• There was a throbbing in her temples. 她的太阳穴直跳。

36 Mediterranean   

adj.地中海的；地中海沿岸的

参考例句：

• The houses are Mediterranean in character.这些房子都属地中海风格。
• Gibraltar is the key to the Mediterranean.直布罗陀是地中海的要冲。

37 tenuous   

adj.细薄的，稀薄的，空洞的

参考例句：

• He has a rather tenuous grasp of reality.他对现实认识很肤浅。
• The air ten miles above the earth is very tenuous.距离地面十公里的空气十分稀薄。

38 refunding   

n.借新债还旧债；再融资；债务延展；发行新债券取代旧债券v.归还，退还( refund的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• They are refunding parents their money on over a billion toys. 他们退还父母他们的金钱在十亿个玩具。 来自互联网
• I am refunding the extra, but getting tired of doing this. 我退还额外的，而是要改变这样累了。 来自互联网

39 blurring   

n.模糊，斑点甚多，（图像的）混乱v.（使）变模糊( blur的现在分词 )；（使）难以区分

参考例句：

• Retinal hemorrhage, and blurring of the optic dise cause visual disturbances. 视网膜出血及神经盘模糊等可导致视力障碍。 来自辞典例句
• In other ways the Bible limited Puritan writing, blurring and deadening the pages. 另一方面，圣经又限制了清教时期的作品，使它们显得晦涩沉闷。 来自辞典例句

40 precipitated   

v.（突如其来地）使发生( precipitate的过去式和过去分词 )；促成；猛然摔下；使沉淀

参考例句：

• His resignation precipitated a leadership crisis. 他的辞职立即引发了领导层的危机。
• He lost his footing and was precipitated to the ground. 他失足摔倒在地上。 来自《简明英汉词典》

41 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。

42 coerce   

v.强迫，压制

参考例句：

• You can't coerce her into obedience.你不能强制她服从。
• Do you think there is any way that we can coerce them otherwise?你认为我们有什么办法强迫他们不那样吗？

43 covenants   

n.（有法律约束的）协议( covenant的名词复数 )；盟约；公约；（向慈善事业、信托基金会等定期捐款的）契约书

参考例句：

• Do I need to review the Deed of mutual Covenants (DMC)? 我是否需要覆核公共契约(DMC)吗？ 来自互联网
• Many listed and unlisted companies need to sell to address covenants. 许多上市公司和非上市公司需要出售手中资产，以满足借贷契约的要求。 来自互联网

44 interpretation   

n.解释，说明，描述；艺术处理

参考例句：

• His statement admits of one interpretation only.他的话只有一种解释。
• Analysis and interpretation is a very personal thing.分析与说明是个很主观的事情。