IT was an evening at the end of the month, and Jude had just returned home from hearing a lecture on ancient history in the public hall not far off. When he entered, Sue, who had been keeping indoors during his absence, laid out supper for him. Contrary to custom she did not speak. Jude had taken up some illustrated1 paper, which he perused2 till, raising his eyes, he saw that her face was troubled.
"Are you depressed3, Sue?" he said.
She paused a moment. "I have a message for you," she answered.
"Somebody has called?"
"Yes. A woman." Sue's voice quavered as she spoke5, and she suddenly sat down from her preparations, laid her hands in her lap, and looked into the fire. "I don't know whether I did right or not!" she continued. "I said you were not at home, and when she said she would wait, I said I thought you might not be able to see her."
"Why did you say that, dear? I suppose she wanted a headstone. Was she in mourning?"
"No. She wasn't in mourning, and she didn't want a headstone; and I thought you couldn't see her." Sue looked critically and imploringly6 at him.
"But who was she? Didn't she say?"
"No. She wouldn't give her name. But I know who she was--I think I do! It was Arabella!"
"Heaven save us! What should Arabella come for? What made you think it was she?"
"Oh, I can hardly tell. But I know it was! I feel perfectly7 certain it was--by the light in her eyes as she looked at me. She was a fleshy, coarse woman."
"Well--I should not have called Arabella coarse exactly, except in speech, though she may be getting so by this time under the duties of the public house. She was rather handsome when I knew her."
"Handsome! But yes!--so she is!"
"I think I heard a quiver in your little mouth. Well, waiving8 that, as she is nothing to me, and virtuously10 married to another man, why should she come troubling us?"
"Are you sure she's married? Have you definite news of it?"
"No--not definite news. But that was why she asked me to release her. She and the man both wanted to lead a proper life, as I understood."
"Oh Jude--it was, it WAS Arabella!" cried Sue, covering her eyes with her hand. "And I am so miserable11! It seems such an ill omen4, whatever she may have come for. You could not possibly see her, could you?"
"I don't really think I could. It would be so very painful to talk to her now--for her as much as for me. However, she's gone. Did she say she would come again?"
"No. But she went away very reluctantly."
Sue, whom the least thing upset, could not eat any supper, and when Jude had finished his he prepared to go to bed. He had no sooner raked out the fire, fastened the doors, and got to the top of the stairs than there came a knock. Sue instantly emerged from her room, which she had but just entered.
"There she is again!" Sue whispered in appalled12 accents.
"How do you know?"
"She knocked like that last time."
They listened, and the knocking came again. No servant was kept in the house, and if the summons were to be responded to one of them would have to do it in person. "I'll open a window," said Jude. "Whoever it is cannot be expected to be let in at this time."
He accordingly went into his bedroom and lifted the sash. The lonely street of early retiring workpeople was empty from end to end save of one figure--that of a woman walking up and down by the lamp a few yards off.
"Who's there?" he asked.
"Is that Mr. Fawley?" came up from the woman, in a voice which was unmistakably Arabella's.
Jude replied that it was.
"Is it she?" asked Sue from the door, with lips apart.
"Yes, dear," said Jude. "What do you want, Arabella?" he inquired.
"I beg your pardon, Jude, for disturbing you," said Arabella humbly13. "But I called earlier--I wanted particularly to see you to-night, if I could. I am in trouble, and have nobody to help me!"
"In trouble, are you?"
"Yes."
There was a silence. An inconvenient14 sympathy seemed to be rising in Jude's breast at the appeal. "But aren't you married?" he said.
Arabella hesitated. "No, Jude, I am not," she returned. "He wouldn't, after all. And I am in great difficulty. I hope to get another situation as barmaid soon. But it takes time, and I really am in great distress15 because of a sudden responsibility that's been sprung upon me from Australia; or I wouldn't trouble you--believe me I wouldn't. I want to tell you about it."
Sue remained at gaze, in painful tension, hearing every word, but speaking none.
"You are not really in want of money, Arabella?" he asked, in a distinctly softened16 tone.
"I have enough to pay for the night's lodging17 I have obtained, but barely enough to take me back again."
"Where are you living?"
"In London still." She was about to give the address, but she said, "I am afraid somebody may hear, so I don't like to call out particulars of myself so loud. If you could come down and walk a little way with me towards the Prince Inn, where I am staying to-night, I would explain all. You may as well, for old time's sake!"
"Poor thing! I must do her the kindness of hearing what's the matter, I suppose," said Jude in much perplexity. "As she's going back to-morrow it can't make much difference."
"But you can go and see her to-morrow, Jude! Don't go now, Jude!" came in plaintive18 accents from the doorway19. "Oh, it is only to entrap20 you, I know it is, as she did before! Don't go, dear! She is such a low-passioned woman-- I can see it in her shape, and hear it in her voice!
"But I shall go," said Jude. "Don't attempt to detain me, Sue. God knows I love her little enough now, but I don't want to be cruel to her." He turned to the stairs.
"But she's not your wife!" cried Sue distractedly. "And I----"
"And you are not either, dear, yet," said Jude.
"Oh, but are you going to her? Don't! Stay at home! Please, please stay at home, Jude, and not go to her, now she's not your wife any more than I!"
"Well, she is, rather more than you, come to that," he said, taking his hat determinedly21. "I've wanted you to be, and I've waited with the patience of Job, and I don't see that I've got anything by my self-denial. I shall certainly give her something, and hear what it is she is so anxious to tell me; no man could do less!"
There was that in his manner which she knew it would be futile22 to oppose. She said no more, but, turning to her room as meekly23 as a martyr24, heard him go down-stairs, unbolt the door, and close it behind him. With a woman's disregard of her dignity when in the presence of nobody but herself, she also trotted25 down, sobbing26 articulately as she went. She listened. She knew exactly how far it was to the inn that Arabella had named as her lodging. It would occupy about seven minutes to get there at an ordinary walking pace; seven to come back again. If he did not return in fourteen minutes he would have lingered. She looked at the clock. It was twenty-five minutes to eleven. He MIGHT enter the inn with Arabella, as they would reach it before closing time; she might get him to drink with her; and Heaven only knew what disasters would befall him then.
In a still suspense27 she waited on. It seemed as if the whole time had nearly elapsed when the door was opened again, and Jude appeared.
Sue gave a little ecstatic cry. "Oh, I knew I could trust you!-- how good you are!"--she began.
"I can't find her anywhere in this street, and I went out in my slippers28 only. She has walked on, thinking I've been so hard-hearted as to refuse her requests entirely29, poor woman. I've come back for my boots, as it is beginning to rain."
"Oh, but why should you take such trouble for a woman who has served you so badly!" said Sue in a jealous burst of disappointment.
"But, Sue, she's a woman, and I once cared for her; and one can't be a brute30 in such circumstances."
"She isn't your wife any longer!" exclaimed Sue, passionately31 excited. "You MUSTN'T go out to find her! It isn't right! You CAN'T join her, now she's a stranger to you. How can you forget such a thing, my dear, dear one!"
"She seems much the same as ever--an erring32, careless, unreflecting fellow-creature," he said, continuing to pull on his boots. "What those legal fellows have been playing at in London makes no difference in my real relations to her. If she was my wife while she was away in Australia with another husband she's my wife now."
"But she wasn't! That's just what I hold! There's the absurdity33!-- Well--you'll come straight back, after a few minutes, won't you, dear? She is too low, too coarse for you to talk to long, Jude, and was always!"
"Perhaps I am coarse too, worse luck! I have the germs of every human infirmity in me, I verily believe--that was why I saw it was so preposterous34 of me to think of being a curate. I have cured myself of drunkenness I think; but I never know in what new form a suppressed vice35 will break out in me! I do love you, Sue, though I have danced attendance on you so long for such poor returns! All that's best and noblest in me loves you, and your freedom from everything that's gross has elevated me, and enabled me to do what I should never have dreamt myself capable of, or any man, a year or two ago. It is all very well to preach about self-control, and the wickedness of coercing36 a woman. But I should just like a few virtuous9 people who have condemned37 me in the past, about Arabella and other things, to have been in my tantalizing38 position with you through these late weeks!--they'd believe, I think, that I have exercised some little restraint in always giving in to your wishes--living here in one house, and not a soul between us."
"Yes, you have been good to me, Jude; I know you have, my dear protector."
"Well--Arabella has appealed to me for help. I must go out and speak to her, Sue, at least!"
"I can't say any more!--Oh, if you must, you must!" she said, bursting out into sobs39 that seemed to tear her heart. "I have nobody but you, Jude, and you are deserting me! I didn't know you were like this--I can't bear it, I can't! If she were yours it would be different!"
"Or if you were."
"Very well then--if I must I must. Since you will have it so, I agree! I will be. Only I didn't mean to! And I didn't want to marry again, either! ... But, yes--I agree, I agree! I do love you. I ought to have known that you would conquer in the long run, living like this!"
She ran across and flung her arms round his neck. "I am not a cold-natured, sexless creature, am I, for keeping you at such a distance? I am sure you don't think so! Wait and see! I do belong to you, don't I? I give in!"
"And I'll arrange for our marriage to-morrow, or as soon as ever you wish."
"Yes, Jude."
"Then I'll let her go," said he, embracing Sue softly. "I do feel that it would be unfair to you to see her, and perhaps unfair to her. She is not like you, my darling, and never was: it is only bare justice to say that. Don't cry any more. There; and there; and there!" He kissed her on one side, and on the other, and in the middle, and rebolted the front door.
The next morning it was wet.
"Now, dear," said Jude gaily40 at breakfast; "as this is Saturday I mean to call about the banns at once, so as to get the first publishing done to-morrow, or we shall lose a week. Banns will do? We shall save a pound or two."
Sue absently agreed to banns. But her mind for the moment was running on something else. A glow had passed away from her, and depression sat upon her features.
"I feel I was wickedly selfish last night!" she murmured. "It was sheer unkindness in me--or worse--to treat Arabella as I did. I didn't care about her being in trouble, and what she wished to tell you! Perhaps it was really something she was justified41 in telling you. That's some more of my badness, I suppose! Love has its own dark morality when rivalry42 enters in-- at least, mine has, if other people's hasn't.... I wonder how she got on? I hope she reached the inn all right, poor woman."
"Oh yes: she got on all right," said Jude placidly43.
"I hope she wasn't shut out, and that she hadn't to walk the streets in the rain. Do you mind my putting on my waterproof44 and going to see if she got in? I've been thinking of her all the morning."
"Well--is it necessary? You haven't the least idea how Arabella is able to shift for herself. Still, darling, if you want to go and inquire you can."
There was no limit to the strange and unnecessary penances45 which Sue would meekly undertake when in a contrite46 mood; and this going to see all sorts of extraordinary persons whose relation to her was precisely47 of a kind that would have made other people shun48 them was her instinct ever, so that the request did not surprise him.
"And when you come back," he added, "I'll be ready to go about the banns. You'll come with me?"
Sue agreed, and went off under cloak and umbrella letting Jude kiss her freely, and returning his kisses in a way she had never done before. Times had decidedly changed. "The little bird is caught at last!" she said, a sadness showing in her smile.
"No--only nested," he assured her.
She walked along the muddy street till she reached the public house mentioned by Arabella, which was not so very far off. She was informed that Arabella had not yet left, and in doubt how to announce herself so that her predecessor49 in Jude's affections would recognize her, she sent up word that a friend from Spring Street had called, naming the place of Jude's residence. She was asked to step upstairs, and on being shown into a room found that it was Arabella's bedroom, and that the latter had not yet risen. She halted on the turn of her toe till Arabella cried from the bed, "Come in and shut the door," which Sue accordingly did.
Arabella lay facing the window, and did not at once turn her head: and Sue was wicked enough, despite her penitence50, to wish for a moment that Jude could behold51 her forerunner52 now, with the daylight full upon her. She may have seemed handsome enough in profile under the lamps, but a frowsiness was apparent this morning; and the sight of her own fresh charms in the looking-glass made Sue's manner bright, till she reflected what a meanly sexual emotion this was in her, and hated herself for it.
"I've just looked in to see if you got back comfortably last night, that's all," she said gently. "I was afraid afterwards that you might have met with any mishap53?"
"Oh--how stupid this is! I thought my visitor was--your friend-- your husband--Mrs. Fawley, as I suppose you call yourself?" said Arabella, flinging her head back upon the pillows with a disappointed toss, and ceasing to retain the dimple she had just taken the trouble to produce.
"Indeed I don't," said Sue.
"Oh, I thought you might have, even if he's not really yours. Decency54 is decency, any hour of the twenty-four."
"I don't know what you mean," said Sue stiffly. "He is mine, if you come to that!"
"He wasn't yesterday."
Sue coloured roseate, and said "How do you know?"
"From your manner when you talked to me at the door. Well, my dear, you've been quick about it, and I expect my visit last night helped it on-- ha-ha! But I don't want to get him away from you."
Sue looked out at the rain, and at the dirty toilet-cover, and at the detached tail of Arabella's hair hanging on the looking-glass, just as it had done in Jude's time; and wished she had not come. In the pause there was a knock at the door, and the chambermaid brought in a telegram for "Mrs. Cartlett."
Arabella opened it as she lay, and her ruffled55 look disappeared.
"I am much obliged to you for your anxiety about me," she said blandly56 when the maid had gone; "but it is not necessary you should feel it. My man finds he can't do without me after all, and agrees to stand by the promise to marry again over here that he has made me all along. See here! This is in answer to one from me." She held out the telegram for Sue to read, but Sue did not take it. "He asks me to come back. His little corner public in Lambeth would go to pieces without me, he says. But he isn't going to knock me about when he has had a drop, any more after we are spliced57 by English law than before! ... As for you, I should coax58 Jude to take me before the parson straight off, and have done with it, if I were in your place. I say it as a friend, my dear."
"He's waiting to, any day," returned Sue, with frigid59 pride.
"Then let him, in Heaven's name. Life with a man is more businesslike after it, and money matters work better. And then, you see, if you have rows, and he turns you out of doors, you can get the law to protect you, which you can't otherwise, unless he half-runs you through with a knife, or cracks your noddle with a poker60. And if he bolts away from you--I say it friendly, as woman to woman, for there's never any knowing what a man med do-- you'll have the sticks o' furniture, and won't be looked upon as a thief. I shall marry my man over again, now he's willing, as there was a little flaw in the first ceremony. In my telegram last night which this is an answer to, I told him I had almost made it up with Jude; and that frightened him, I expect! Perhaps I should quite have done it if it hadn't been for you," she said laughing; "and then how different our histories might have been from to-day! Never such a tender fool as Jude is if a woman seems in trouble, and coaxes61 him a bit! Just as he used to be about birds and things. However, as it happens, it is just as well as if I had made it up, and I forgive you. And, as I say, I'd advise you to get the business legally done as soon as possible. You'll find it an awful bother later on if you don't."
"I have told you he is asking me to marry him--to make our natural marriage a legal one," said Sue, with yet more dignity. "It was quite by my wish that he didn't the moment I was free."
"Ah, yes--you are a oneyer too, like myself," said Arabella, eyeing her visitor with humorous criticism. "Bolted from your first, didn't you, like me?"
"Good morning!--I must go," said Sue hastily.
"And I, too, must up and off!" replied the other, springing out of bed so suddenly that the soft parts of her person shook. Sue jumped aside in trepidation62. "Lord, I am only a woman-- not a six-foot sojer! ... Just a moment, dear," she continued, putting her hand on Sue's arm. "I really did want to consult Jude on a little matter of business, as I told him. I came about that more than anything else. Would he run up to speak to me at the station as I am going? You think not. Well, I'll write to him about it. I didn't want to write it, but never mind-- I will."
月末一个晚上，裘德到附近公共会堂听完古代史讲演后回到家里。苏在他外出时，并没出去，他一到家，她就给他摆上晚饭。异乎平常习惯，她没跟他说说笑笑。裘德拿起一份画报看着，后来他一抬眼睛，发现她满面愁容。
“你不高兴啦，苏？”他说。
她稍停了一下。‘有件事得告诉你。”她答道。
“有人来过？”
“有人来过，是个女人。”苏说话时声音打颤。突然她把饭一撂，坐下来了，两手放在膝头上，眼睛盯着炉火。“我也不知道做得对，还是不对！”她接着说，“我说你没在家，她说要等你，我告诉她，我认为你大概不会见她。”
“你干吗这么说呀，亲爱的？我想她是想做个墓碑吧。她穿没穿孝？”
“不是那么回事。她没穿孝，也不是要做墓碑，可是我当时想你不好见她就是啦！”她看着他，既是批评，又是央求的意思。
“究意是谁呢？她没说吗？”
“没说。她不愿意说名字。可我知道是谁——我想我知道！是阿拉贝拉！”
“天哪！阿拉贝拉跑来干什么？你怎么认为是她？”
“哦，我也说不上来。不过我知道一定是她！我觉着百分之百是她——一瞧她看人那股子眼神就明白啦。她是个又臃肿。又粗俗的女人。”
“呃——我看说阿拉贝拉粗俗还不大恰当呢，她说话倒是有点俗。不过她在酒馆里做生意，习惯成自然，人也就粗俗了。我认识她时候，她还算漂亮。”
“漂亮！对，对！她才漂亮哪！”
“我觉着你声音抖抖的。唉，别提这个啦，反正她跟我没关系啦，再说她规规矩矩嫁了人，何必跑来找咱们的麻烦呢！”
“你真信她又嫁了人？你得了确实消息？”
“没有——没什么确实消息。不过她就是为嫁人才求我高抬贵手。我原来想她要跟那个男的正儿八经过日子。”
“哦，裘德——那可是阿拉贝拉，一点不假哟！”苏大声说，拿手蒙上眼睛。“我可太苦啦！别管她为什么来，这可不是个好兆头啊。你总不会见她吧，对不对？”
“我实在不想见她。这会儿跟她说话，不论是对我，还是对她，都是痛苦的。反正她已经走了。她说没说还来？”
“说是没说，不过她走的时候挺不愿意的。”
苏这人为一点芝麻绿豆的事就心烦意乱，一日晚饭都吃不下去；裘德吃了，就打算睡觉。他刚把火拨开，门紧了街门，上了楼梯，只听见有人敲门。苏才进自己屋子，又马上出来了。
“她又来啦！”她轻轻说，声音带着惊恐。
“你怎么知道是她？”
“她刚才就这么敲门来着。”
他们静听着。门又敲了一回。他们家没仆人，凡是有人来找，他们两个里头总得有一个亲自去接待才行。“我先开窗户瞧瞧。”裘德说。“先别管是谁，这时候总不便进来。”
说着他进了卧室，把窗格推上去。在这条偏僻的街上，做工的人老早就歇了，从这头到那头空荡荡的，只有个人影，一个女人身形，在几码远的路灯旁边盘旋。
“谁在那儿？”他问。
“福来先生吗？”女人走过来了，是阿拉贝拉的声音，一点不错。
裘德回答是。
“是她吧？”苏在门边问，张着嘴。
“是她，亲爱的。”裘德说。“你要干什么，阿拉贝拉？”他不客气地问她。
“裘德，我来打搅你，实在对不起。”阿拉贝拉低声下气说。“我先来过了——我今天晚上特别得见你一下，要是行的话。我现在挺伤脑筋，没人帮我！”
“伤脑筋，你伤脑筋？”
“是啊。”
接着沉默了一下。裘德一听她诉苦，不由得心里涌起了可说是不合时宜的同情。“可是你不是结了婚吗？”他说。
阿拉贝拉犹豫了一下。“没有，裘德，我没结婚。”她回答。“怎么说呢，他后来不干啦。这一来我困难极了。我希望过一阵子找个女招待当当，可这得等啊。我再没料到澳洲那边把个挑子撂在我身上，我实在太苦恼啦；要不然我就不来麻烦你了——请你相信我并不想麻烦你。我想跟你说说这件事。”
苏在痛苦的紧张中两只眼睛愣愣的，她每个字都听见了，可是什么也没说。
“那你不是缺钱用吧，阿拉贝拉！”他问，口气明显缓和下来。
“我手里钱够我今儿晚上付住宿费，回去的钱就紧了。”
“那你家在什么地方？”
“还是伦敦，”她本要把住址告诉他，可是她说，“我现在怕别人听见，所以不想大声讲自个儿的详细情形。你要是肯下来，跟我往王子饭店那边走一小段路。我就给你说清楚，我就在那边住。看在老交情分儿上，这总可以吧？”
“可怜的东西！我看我得发点善心，听她说说怎么回事。”裘德说，实在拿不定主意。“反正她明天就回去，听听也无所谓。”
“不过你明天还是可以见她嘛，裘德！现在别去，裘德！”过道里发出央求的声音。“哦，这明明是叫你上钩，我看得出来，她从前就这么干过！别去，千万别去，亲爱的！她是个下三滥，我一看她块头，一听她嗓音，就知道是什么东西啦。”
“不过我还是要去。”裘德说。“别拦我吧，苏，上帝也知道，我现在根本不爱她，可是我也不愿意对她狠。”他转身下楼。
“可她不是你妻子呀！”苏气急败坏地叫出来。“我——”
“你也不是我妻子，亲爱的，到这会儿也不是！”裘德说。
“哦，你一定要去？不行！呆在家里头！就求你呆在家里头吧，裘德！反正这会儿她不是，我也不是，你就别去好吧！”
“唉，要是这么说，她跟你比，还有几分算我的妻子呢。”他说，果断地把帽子一拿。“我一直求你做我的妻子，我一直像约伯一样耐心等得个没完没了，不管我怎么克制自己，到头来还是一场空。我一定得听听她为什么事这么着急，要跟我说；我得多多少少对得起她，但凡是个男子汉都这样！”
她从他态度上看出来再反对也没用，也就没再说什么，不过在她像殉教者那样沉住气回屋子的时候，还是注意听着他下搂，拉开门闩，然后又关上门。她也跟别的女人跟前没人一样，不管什么身份面子不身份面子，紧跟着奔下楼，边走还边哭出声。她注意听。她不知道阿拉贝拉提到名字的那个旅店究竟高这儿多远，根据平常走路快慢毛估一下，大概一去要走七分钟，回来再走七分钟。要是他十四分钟之后还没回来，那他就是在那儿耽误住了。她瞧瞧钟，差二十五分到十一点。他跟阿拉贝拉到旅店时候，大门还没关；他可能跟她一块儿进去；她可能拉他一块儿喝酒，天晓得他要遭什么殃啊。
她屏息静气、提心吊胆地等着。她算的那段时间似乎刚要完，门就开了，裘德走进来。
她乐得一下子叫出来了。“哦，我就知道你守信用——你真好！”——她开始说。
“街上哪儿也找不到她，我出去时候穿着拖鞋。她已经走远了，心里一定想我心多狠，根本不理她要求，可怜的女人！我回来是换靴子，已经下雨啦。”
“哦，那女人待你那么坏，你干吗还替她操心！”苏说，因为醋意不禁流露出失望。
“不过，她是个女人哪，苏，先前我也对她不错；她到了这地步，人总不能铁石心肠吧。”
“她现在不是你妻子啦！”她大喊大叫，情绪异常激动。“不许你出去找她！你这样不对！你不能凑到她一块儿。现在她跟你是路人。你怎么连这点简单道理都忘啦，亲爱的，亲爱的！”
“她这会儿样子跟从前还没什么两样——总还是个同类，无非老是出错儿，随随便便，不动脑筋。”他说，继续穿靴子。“伦敦那些吃法律饭的家伙，不管玩了什么把戏，反正对我跟她的真正关系没影响。如果说她在澳洲跟那个男的一块儿的时候，她还是我的妻子，那她这会儿不还是我的妻子嘛。”
“可是她已经不是啦！这是我绝对的看法，你可真荒谬啊——好吧，你去几分钟，别耽误，就回来，行不行，亲爱的？裘德，她这人太下作，太粗俗，你用不着跟她多说，她变不了！”
“大概我也一样粗俗，那就更糟啦！凡是人天生来的意志薄弱，优柔寡断，我是样样齐全，这我也是一点不怀疑，所以我一想到我要是个牧师的话，那真是驴唇不对马嘴啊。我算是把酗酒戒掉了，可是我完全不知道我身上一时压下去的坏毛病会用个什么形式再犯起来。苏啊，我是真爱你的呀，虽说我对你缠绵了这么久，至今还是一无所获。我这人心里最优美最高尚的成分都集中在对你的爱情上，你摆脱了一切粗俗，一两年前就把我也提高了，使我能做到在我自己或别人做梦也没想到能做到的事。口口声声说什么自我克制，说什么强逼女人怎么卑鄙，这当然好得很，好极啦。可是那几位正人君子，他们过去为阿拉贝拉跟别的事鄙视我，我倒真想看看他们也跟我这样试这么多个礼拜，白守着你，望梅止渴，画饼充饥，是个什么滋味！——我想，咱们住在一个房子里，中间没别的活人，我自始至终对你的愿望步步退让，唯命是从，他们总该承认这多少得有点克己功夫吧。”
“是啊，你一直对我很好，裘德；我怎么会不知道呢，我的亲爱的保护人。”
“好啦，阿拉贝拉恳求我帮忙，至少我得去跟她谈谈哪，苏！”
“我不好再说什么啦！——要是你非去不可，你就去吧！”她说，突然抽抽噎噎哭起来，仿佛芳心欲碎。“我只有你好指望啦，裘德呀，你要把我甩啦！我以前不知道你是这么回事——我受不了啦。受不了啦！她要真是你的人，那就两样了。”
“你要是我的人，不也就两样吗？”
“那太好啦——要是我非做你妻子不可，我就做吧。既然你一定要这样，我答应啦，我说到做到！可是我本来没这个意思，再说我也不想再结婚哪！……好，好，我答应啦，我答应啦！我是真心爱你。我本来就知道你早晚会得手，按现在说的这样过。”
她跑过去，两只胳臂把他脖子搂住。“我把你推得老远的，是不是因为我是个天生冷、没性感的女人？我敢说你没这么想！你等着瞧吧！我这就算你的人啦，对不对？我投降啦！”
“明天我就准备咱们的婚事吧，反正按你的意见，什么时候都可以。”
“好吧，裘德。”
“那我就不管她啦。”他一边说，一边温柔地搂着她。“我心里也真想，我去看她，对你自然说不过去，对她大概也说不过去。我的亲亲，她跟你不一样，永远也不一样——说这话实在是因为不想委屈你。别哭啦。这边，这边，再这边！”他吻了她一边脸，又吻了另一边脸，还吻了脸中间，然后把前门又闩上了。
第二天早晨下雨。
“现在，亲爱的，”裘德吃早饭时乐滋滋地说，“今天正好礼拜六，我想立刻去办结婚启事，这样明天第一份印好就可以发了，要不然就得耽误一个礼拜。用启事行吗？咱们可以省一两镑呢。”
她心不在焉地同意出启事。其实她这会儿心里正转悠着别的事。她脸上没了光彩，沮丧的样子。
“我觉着昨晚上我那么自私自利，太可鄙啦。”她咕哝着。“我那样待阿拉贝拉说明我这人刻薄寡恩，也许还更坏呢。她处境那么困难，我一点不往心里去！她多么希望跟你讲讲啊！也许她真有正经事非跟你说不可呢。这一来更显得我这人坏啦！谁要是爱情一碰上情敌，就变得心狠手辣——别人不这样，至少我这样……我不知道她后来怎么办？我但愿她到客栈没出一点事，可怜的女人。”
“哦，是这样，她不会出事。”裘德心无所动地说。
“我希望她没给关在客栈外头，也没下着雨在街上瞎转。我想穿上雨衣去看看她在不在客栈里头，你看行吧？这早上我心里老缠着她的事。”
“呃——有这必要吗？你根本不知道阿拉贝拉素来有看风转舵的本事呢。不过，亲亲，要是你想去了解了解，也无妨。”
苏只要一后悔，就会真心实意做出来希奇古怪而又多此一举的忏悔行动，什么也不顾。因而她不惜看望各种各样的怪人，这是她一贯的本能，至于她跟这类人打交道，要在别人是避之唯恐不及呢。所以她提出这个要求，他并不诧异。
“你一回来，”他又说，“我打算就去办结婚启事。你跟我一块儿去好吗？”
她答应了，让裘德吻了吻，还用她以前没用过的方式回吻了他，于是套好雨披，拿上雨伞，就出门了。时代彻底改变了。“小鸟还是让人逮住啦！”她说，笑中含有一丝悲哀。
“不是逮住——是进了窝啦。”他叫她放心。
她顺着泥泞的街道走到阿拉贝拉说的那家客栈，其实离得并不怎么远。店里人告诉她阿拉贝拉还没走，她拿不定主意到底该用什么名义向裘德当年挚爱的前夫人通报，好让她知道她是谁，后来就说是住在清泉街的一位朋友来看望她，这是裘德住家的街名。店里人请她上楼，让她进了个房间，原来是阿拉贝拉的卧室，她还没起床。她停住脚步，往后一转，想出去，只听得阿拉贝拉在床上大声说，“进来吧，把门关上。”苏就照她说的办了。
阿拉贝拉一榻横陈，对着窗户，并没立刻回过头来。苏先前固然后悔过自己不对，可还是蛮刻毒的，一刹那恨不得裘德能亲眼看看她的捷足先登者在大天白日充分暴露。她侧着的身姿若是在灯光下或许还蛮动人吧，可是这早上她却是皱皱巴巴，邋里邋遢，不堪人目。而苏在镜子里反观自己是多么明丽鲜妍，显得楚楚动人。但是她一转念，觉着自己是在性上动了情，未免下流，就恨起自己来了。
“我是特意来看看你昨晚上回来顺当不顺当，没别的意思。”她和蔼地说。“你走以后，我不放心，怕你碰上什么麻烦。”
“哦——我真够糊涂！我还当来的是——你的朋友——你的先生——福来太太，我想你该这么称呼吧？”阿拉贝拉说，大失所望，又把脑袋撂到枕头上，她刚费心挤出来的酒涡，也没心思保持下去了。
“还不好这么称呼。”苏说。
“就算他还没实实在在算你的人，我看也可以这么称呼嘛。不论什么时候，大面上讲得过去才行哪。”
“我不懂你的话。”苏怪不自在地说。“要是你想明白，那我就告诉你，他是我的人！”
“他昨儿可不是。”
苏脸刷地红了，就说，“你怎么知道？”
“我一瞧你站在门口跟我说话那个劲儿，就知道喽。好啦，亲爱的，你倒是快事快办，我倒想昨晚上我这一去帮了你一大把呢——哈哈！我可是没想把他从你手里夺走啊。”
苏瞧了瞧外面的雨，又瞧了瞧梳妆台上盖的脏布和阿拉贝拉挂在镜子上的散开的假发——样子跟当年她跟裘德时候没两样。苏这会儿但愿没来这趟才好呢。在这停了停没说话的当口，有人敲了敲门，女服务员给‘卡特莱太太”送电报来了。
阿拉贝拉躺着打开了电报，她脸上又急又张惶的样子一下子消失了。
“你这么替我着急，我真得谢谢你。”女服务员走了，她和和气气地说。“不过你也犯不着那么想。我那口子总算明白过来了，知道他要是没我，什么也办不了，答应他一定说了算数，既然他把我逼到这地方，就跟我在这地方再结回婚。你瞧瞧！这就是他给我的答复。”她把电报递给苏看，但是苏没接。“他要我回去。他说，要是没我，他那兰贝斯街角上的小小酒馆就得散了架。英国法律一把我们俩拴在一块儿，跟以前就两样啦，他休想黄汤子往肚子里一灌，就拿我解闷喽！……拿你的事儿说吧，要是我替你想，我就连哄带骗，叫裘德马不停蹄把我带到牧师那儿，一下子全了结了。我够个朋友，才说这话，亲爱的。”
“他正等着办呢，随便哪一天。”苏回了一句，既生硬又高傲。
“那就求老天爷，叫他快办吧。结了婚，再跟男人过，就得丁是丁，卯是卯；有了钱，什么都好办。那时候，你可要记住，要是你们打架，他把你往外赶，你可以用法律保护自个儿，你还只能这么办；除非他拿刀子把你捅了，要么一火钳把你脑袋瓜儿砸烂了。要是他把你甩了，一走了之——我说这话是为你好，咱们女的跟女的什么都好说，因为谁也不知道男的干出来什么——那你就把家具全揽到手，别人也不好说你是贼。我要跟我那口子再来次结婚，这会儿他是心甘情愿，因为头一回婚礼出了点小岔子。我昨晚上发了电报，告诉他我已经跟裘德差不多讲和啦，他这个电报就是为这个来的；我猜，这下子他吓坏了！要不是你挡在前头，我一下子还真能得手呢，”她笑嘻嘻地说：“那一来，从今儿起，咱们俩历史就大不一样喽！女人要是有困难，去找裘德，好歹一哀求，再没像他那样软心肠的傻瓜啦！他以前对鸟什么的也这样。话说回来，事情到了这地步，我同他再好了也没意思啦，我也不计较你啦。我还要跟你讲讲，我劝你早早把事情按法律办了。你要不这样，往后要夜长梦多，麻烦多着呢。”
“我跟你说了，他现在要我跟他结婚——把我们自然形成的婚姻变成依据法律的婚姻。”苏说，态度更庄重了。“这完全因为我刚有自由，我不希望结婚，他才没急着办。”
“哟——你跟我一样，也是由自个儿做主呀！”阿拉贝拉说，带着一副又取笑又批评的神气瞟着她。“也跟我一样，从你头一个那儿跑出来的，对不对？”
“再见，我得走啦。”苏赶忙说。
“我也该起来开路啦！”另一个说，陡地从床上蹦下来，连身上那柔软的部分也颤起来了。苏没防这一手，吓得往旁边一跳。“天哪！我就是个女人哪——又不是个六英尺的丘八大爷！……等等，亲爱的。”她继续说，把手放在苏胳臂上。“我的的确确有正事要跟裘德商量，我跟他说过了。我这回来就是为这件事。他能不能赶到车站来跟我谈谈？怎么，你不想？也好，我就写信告诉他。我本不想写信——不过这也没什么关系，就写吧。”
收听单词发音 |
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illustrated
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| adj. 有插图的，列举的 动词illustrate的过去式和过去分词 | |
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perused
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| v.读（某篇文字）( peruse的过去式和过去分词 )；（尤指）细阅；审阅；匆匆读或心不在焉地浏览（某篇文字） | |
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depressed
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| adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的 | |
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omen
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| n.征兆，预兆；vt.预示 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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imploringly
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| adv. 恳求地, 哀求地 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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waiving
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| v.宣布放弃( waive的现在分词 )；搁置；推迟；放弃（权利、要求等） | |
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virtuous
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| adj.有品德的，善良的，贞洁的，有效力的 | |
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virtuously
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| 合乎道德地，善良地 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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appalled
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| v.使惊骇，使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的；丧胆的 | |
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humbly
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| adv. 恭顺地，谦卑地 | |
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inconvenient
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| adj.不方便的，令人感到麻烦的 | |
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distress
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| n.苦恼，痛苦，不舒适；不幸；vt.使悲痛 | |
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softened
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| （使）变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 )； 缓解打击； 缓和； 安慰 | |
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lodging
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| n.寄宿，住所；(大学生的)校外宿舍 | |
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plaintive
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| adj.可怜的，伤心的 | |
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doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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entrap
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| v.以网或陷阱捕捉，使陷入圈套 | |
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determinedly
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| adv.决意地；坚决地，坚定地 | |
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futile
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| adj.无效的，无用的，无希望的 | |
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meekly
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| adv.温顺地，逆来顺受地 | |
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martyr
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| n.烈士，殉难者；vt.杀害，折磨，牺牲 | |
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trotted
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| 小跑，急走( trot的过去分词 )； 匆匆忙忙地走 | |
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sobbing
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| <主方>Ⅰ adj.湿透的 | |
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suspense
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| n.（对可能发生的事）紧张感，担心，挂虑 | |
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slippers
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| n. 拖鞋 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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passionately
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| ad.热烈地，激烈地 | |
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erring
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| 做错事的，错误的 | |
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absurdity
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| n.荒谬，愚蠢；谬论 | |
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preposterous
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| adj.荒谬的，可笑的 | |
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vice
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| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
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coercing
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| v.迫使做( coerce的现在分词 )；强迫；（以武力、惩罚、威胁等手段）控制；支配 | |
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condemned
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| adj. 被责难的, 被宣告有罪的 动词condemn的过去式和过去分词 | |
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tantalizing
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| adj.逗人的；惹弄人的；撩人的；煽情的v.逗弄，引诱，折磨( tantalize的现在分词 ) | |
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sobs
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| 啜泣（声），呜咽（声）( sob的名词复数 ) | |
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gaily
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| adv.欢乐地，高兴地 | |
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justified
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| a.正当的，有理的 | |
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rivalry
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| n.竞争，竞赛，对抗 | |
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placidly
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| adv.平稳地，平静地 | |
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waterproof
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| n.防水材料；adj.防水的；v.使...能防水 | |
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penances
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| n.（赎罪的）苦行，苦修( penance的名词复数 ) | |
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contrite
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| adj.悔悟了的，后悔的，痛悔的 | |
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precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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shun
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| vt.避开，回避，避免 | |
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predecessor
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| n.前辈，前任 | |
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penitence
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| n.忏悔，赎罪；悔过 | |
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behold
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| v.看，注视，看到 | |
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forerunner
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| n.前身，先驱（者），预兆，祖先 | |
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mishap
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| n.不幸的事，不幸；灾祸 | |
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decency
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| n.体面，得体，合宜，正派，庄重 | |
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ruffled
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| adj. 有褶饰边的, 起皱的 动词ruffle的过去式和过去分词 | |
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blandly
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| adv.温和地，殷勤地 | |
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spliced
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| adj.（针织品）加固的n.叠接v.绞接( splice的过去式和过去分词 )；捻接（两段绳子）；胶接；粘接（胶片、磁带等） | |
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coax
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| v.哄诱，劝诱，用诱哄得到，诱取 | |
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frigid
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| adj.寒冷的，凛冽的；冷淡的；拘禁的 | |
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poker
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| n.扑克；vt.烙制 | |
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coaxes
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| v.哄，用好话劝说( coax的第三人称单数 )；巧言骗取；哄劝，劝诱 | |
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trepidation
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| n.惊恐，惶恐 | |
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