It is many years since I was appointed to the parish of Kilronan. It happened in this wise. The Bishop2, the old man, sent for me; and said, with what I would call a tone of pity or contempt, but he was incapable3 of either, for he was the essence of charity and sincerity:—
"Father Dan, you are a bit of a litterateur, I understand. Kilronan is vacant. You'll have plenty of time for poetizing and dreaming there. What do you say to it?"
I put on a little dignity, and, though my heart was beating with delight, I quietly thanked his Lordship. But, when I had passed beyond the reach of episcopal vision, which is far stretching enough, I spun4 my hat in the air, and shouted like a schoolboy: "Hurrah5!"
You wonder at my ecstasies6! Listen. I was a dreamer, and the dream of my life, when shut up in musty towns, where the atmosphere was redolent of drink, and you heard nothing but scandal, and saw nothing but sin,—the dream of my life was a home by the sea, with its purity and freedom, and its infinite expanse, telling me of God. For, from the time when as a child the roar of the surges set my pulse beating, and the scents7 of the weed and the brine would make me turn pale with pleasure, I used to pray that some day, when my life's work would be nearly done, and I had put in my years of honest labor8 in the dusty streets, I might spend my declining years in the peace of a seaside village, and go down to my grave, washed free from the contaminations of life in the daily watching and loving of those
"Moving waters at their priestlike task
Of cold ablution round earth's human shores."
My wish was realized, and I was jubilant.
Returning home by train, when my emotion had calmed down, my mind could not help recurring9 to the expression used by the Bishop; and it suggested the following reflections: How has it come to pass in Ireland that "poet" and "saint" are terms which denote some weakness or irregularity in their possessors? At one time in our history we know that the bard10 was second only to the King in power and influence; and are we not vaguely11 proud of that title the world gives us,—Island of Saints? Yet, nowadays, through some fatal degeneracy, a poet is looked upon as an idealist, an unpractical builder of airy castles, to whom no one would go for advice in an important matter, or intrust with the investment of a five-pound note. And to speak of a man or woman as a "saint" is to hint at some secret imbecility, which it would be charitable to pass over in silence. I was quite well aware, therefore, on that day, when I had the secret pleasure and the sublime12 misfortune of seeing my name in print over some wretched verses, that I was ruining my prospects13 in life. The fact of being a litterateur, although in the most modest and hidden manner, stamped me as a volatile14, flighty creature, who was no more to be depended upon than a feather in the wind; or, as the Italians say, qu' al piume al vento. It is a curious prejudice, and a purely15 insular16 one. And sometimes I think, or rather I used to think, that there was something infinitely17 grotesque18 in these narrow ideas, that shut us out from sympathy with the quick moving, subtle world as completely as if we were fakirs by the banks of the sacred Ganges. For what does modern literature deal with? Exactly those questions of philosophy, ethics19, and morality which form the staple20 material of theological studies and discussions in our own colleges and academies. Novels, poetry, essays, lectures, treatises21 on the natural sciences,—all deal with the great central questions of man's being, his origin, and his conduct. And surely it is folly22 to ignore these discussions in the market places of the world, because they are literature, and not couched in scholastic23 syllogisms. Dear me! I am philosophizing,—I, old Daddy Dan, with the children plucking at my coat-tails and the brown snuff staining my waistcoat, and, ah, yes! the place already marked in my little chapel25, where I shall sleep at last. I must have been angry, or gloomy, that day, thirty years ago, when I stepped on the platform at M——, after my interview with the Bishop, and met my friends, who had already become aware that I was elevated out of the junior ranks, and had become an independent officer of the Church Militant26.
"You don't mean to say that you have accepted that awful place?" said one.
"You'll have nothing but fish to eat," said another. "The butcher's van goes there but once a week."
"And no society but fishermen," said a third. "And they speak nothing but Irish, and you know you cannot bless yourself in Irish."
"Well," I replied, "my Job's comforters, I have accepted Kilronan, and am going there. If all things go well, and you are good boys, I may ask for some of you as curate—"
"You'll be glad to get a curacy yourself in six months," they shouted in chorus.
And so I came to Kilronan, and here have I been since. The years have rolled by swiftly. Life is a coach, whose wheels move slowly and painfully at the start; but, once set moving, particularly when going down the deep decline of life, the years move so swiftly you cannot see the spokes27 in the wheels, which are the days we number so sadly. What glorious resolutions I made the first months of my residence here! How I would read and write and burn the midnight oil, and astonish the world, and grow from dignity to dignity into an honored old age! Alas29! circumstances are too much for us all, and here I am, in my seventieth year, poor old Daddy Dan, with no great earthly trouble, indeed, and some few consolations,—my breviary and the grand psalms30 of hope,—my daily Mass and its hidden and unutterable sweetness,—the love of little children and their daily smiles,—the prayers of my old women, and, I think, the reverence31 of the men. But there comes a little sting sometimes, when I see young priests, who served my Masses long ago, standing32 in cathedral stalls in all the glory of purple and ermine, and when I see great parishes passing into the hands of mere33 boys, and poor old Daddy Dan passed over in silence. I know, if I were really good and resigned, I would bless God for it all, and I do. But human nature will revolt sometimes, and people will say, "What a shame, Father Dan; why haven't you the red buttons as well as so and so," or, "What ails24 the Bishop, passing over one of the most learned men in the diocese for a parcel of gossoons!" I suppose it was my own fault. I remember what magnificent ideas I had. I would build factories, I would ferr the streets, I would establish a fishing station and make Kilronan the favorite bathing resort on the western coast; I would write books and be, all round, a model of push, energy, and enterprise. And I did try. I might as well have tried to remove yonder mountain with a pitchfork, or stop the roll of the Atlantic with a rope of sand. Nothing on earth can cure the inertia34 of Ireland. It weighs down like the weeping clouds on the damp heavy earth, and there's no lifting it, nor disburthening of the souls of men of this intolerable weight. I was met on every side with a stare of curiosity, as if I were propounding35 something immoral36 or heretical. People looked at me, put their hands in their pockets, whistled dubiously37, and went slowly away. Oh, it was weary, weary work! The blood was stagnant38 in the veins39 of the people and their feet were shod with lead. They walked slowly, spoke28 with difficulty, stared all day at leaden clouds or pale sunlight, stood at the corners of the village for hours looking into vacuity40, and the dear little children became old the moment they left school, and lost the smiles and the sunlight of childhood. It was a land of the lotos. The people were narcotized. Was it the sea air? I think I read somewhere in an old philosopher, called Berkeley, that the damp salt air of the sea has a curious phlegmatic41 effect on the blood, and will coagulate it and produce gout and sundry42 disorders43. However that be, there was a weary weight on everything around Kilronan. The cattle slept in the fields, the fishermen slept in their coracles. It was a land of sleep and dreams.
I approached the agent about a foreshore for the pier44, for you cannot, in Ireland, take the most preliminary and initial step in anything without going, cap in hand, to the agent. I explained my intentions. He smiled, but was polite.
"Lord L——, you know, is either in Monte Carlo or yachting in the Levant. He must be consulted. I can do nothing."
"And when will his Lordship return?"
"Probably in two years."
"You have no power to grant a lease of the foreshore, or even give temporary permission to erect45 a pier?"
"None whatever."
I went to the Presentment Sessions about a grant for paving or flagging the wretched street. I woke a nest of hornets.
"What! More taxation46! Aren't the people crushed enough already? Where can we get money to meet rates and taxes? Flagging Kilronan! Oh, of course! Wouldn't your reverence go in for gas or the electric light? Begor, ye'll be wanting a water supply next," etc., etc.
I applied47 to a factory a few miles distant to establish a local industry by cottage labor, which is cheap and remunerative48.
"They would be delighted, but—" And so all my castles came tumbling down from the clouds, and left them black and lowering and leaden as before. Once or twice, later on, I made a few spasmodic efforts to galvanize the place into life; they, too, failed, and I accepted the inevitable49. When Father Laverty came he helped me to bear the situation with philosophical50 calmness. He had seen the world, and had been rubbed badly in contact with it. He had adopted as his motto and watchword the fatal Cui bono? And he had printed in large Gothic letters over his mantelpiece the legend:
'T WILL BE ALL THE SAME IN A HUNDRED YEARS.
And so I drifted, drifted down from high empyreans of great ideals and lofty speculations51 into a humdrum52 life, that was only saved from sordidness53 by the sacred duties of my office. After all, I find that we are not independent of our circumstances. We are fashioned and moulded by them as plaster of Paris is fashioned and moulded into angels or gargoyles54 by the deft55 hand of the sculptor56. "Thou shalt lower to his level," true of the wife in Locksley Hall, is true of all who are thrown by fate or fortune into unhappy environments. In my leisure moments, when I took up my pen to write, some evil spirit whispered, Cui bono? and I laid down my pen and hid my manuscript. Once or twice I took up some old Greek poets and essayed to translate them. I have kept the paper still, frayed57 and yellow with age; but the fatal Cui bono? disheartened me, and I flung it aside. Even my love for the sea had vanished, and I had begun to hate it. During the first few years of my ministry58 I spent hours by the cliffs and shores, or out on the heaving waters. Then the loneliness of the desert and barren wastes repelled59 me, and I had begun to loathe60 it. Altogether I was soured and discontented, and I had a dread61 consciousness that my life was a failure. All its possibilities had passed without being seized and utilized62. I was the barren fig63 tree, fit only to be cut down. May I escape the fire! Such were my surroundings and disposition64 when Father Letheby came.
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
chivalrous
|
|
| adj.武士精神的；对女人彬彬有礼的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
bishop
|
|
| n.主教，（国际象棋）象 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
incapable
|
|
| adj.无能力的，不能做某事的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
spun
|
|
| v.纺，杜撰，急转身 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
hurrah
|
|
| int.好哇，万岁，乌拉 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
ecstasies
|
|
| 狂喜( ecstasy的名词复数 )； 出神； 入迷； 迷幻药 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
scents
|
|
| n.香水( scent的名词复数 )；气味；（动物的）臭迹；（尤指狗的）嗅觉 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
labor
|
|
| n.劳动，努力，工作，劳工；分娩；vi.劳动，努力，苦干；vt.详细分析；麻烦 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
recurring
|
|
| adj.往复的，再次发生的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
bard
|
|
| n.吟游诗人 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
vaguely
|
|
| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
sublime
|
|
| adj.崇高的，伟大的；极度的，不顾后果的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
prospects
|
|
| n.希望，前途(恒为复数) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
volatile
|
|
| adj.反复无常的，挥发性的，稍纵即逝的，脾气火爆的；n.挥发性物质 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
purely
|
|
| adv.纯粹地，完全地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
insular
|
|
| adj.岛屿的，心胸狭窄的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
infinitely
|
|
| adv.无限地，无穷地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
grotesque
|
|
| adj.怪诞的，丑陋的；n.怪诞的图案，怪人（物） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
ethics
|
|
| n.伦理学；伦理观，道德标准 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
staple
|
|
| n.主要产物，常用品，主要要素，原料，订书钉，钩环；adj.主要的，重要的；vt.分类 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
treatises
|
|
| n.专题著作，专题论文，专著( treatise的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
folly
|
|
| n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
scholastic
|
|
| adj.学校的，学院的，学术上的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
ails
|
|
| v.生病( ail的第三人称单数 )；感到不舒服；处境困难；境况不佳 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
chapel
|
|
| n.小教堂，殡仪馆 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
militant
|
|
| adj.激进的，好斗的；n.激进分子，斗士 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
spokes
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条( spoke的名词复数 )；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
spoke
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
alas
|
|
| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
psalms
|
|
| n.赞美诗( psalm的名词复数 )；圣诗；圣歌；(中的) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
reverence
|
|
| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
standing
|
|
| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
mere
|
|
| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
inertia
|
|
| adj.惰性，惯性，懒惰，迟钝 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
propounding
|
|
| v.提出（问题、计划等）供考虑[讨论]，提议( propound的现在分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
immoral
|
|
| adj.不道德的，淫荡的，荒淫的，有伤风化的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
dubiously
|
|
| adv.可疑地，怀疑地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
stagnant
|
|
| adj.不流动的，停滞的，不景气的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
veins
|
|
| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
vacuity
|
|
| n.(想象力等)贫乏，无聊，空白 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
phlegmatic
|
|
| adj.冷静的，冷淡的，冷漠的，无活力的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
sundry
|
|
| adj.各式各样的，种种的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
disorders
|
|
| n.混乱( disorder的名词复数 )；凌乱；骚乱；（身心、机能）失调 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
pier
|
|
| n.码头；桥墩，桥柱；[建]窗间壁，支柱 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
erect
|
|
| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
taxation
|
|
| n.征税，税收，税金 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
applied
|
|
| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
remunerative
|
|
| adj.有报酬的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
inevitable
|
|
| adj.不可避免的，必然发生的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
philosophical
|
|
| adj.哲学家的，哲学上的，达观的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
speculations
|
|
| n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 )；思考；投机活动；推断 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
humdrum
|
|
| adj.单调的，乏味的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
sordidness
|
|
| n.肮脏；污秽；卑鄙；可耻 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
|
54
gargoyles
|
|
| n.怪兽状滴水嘴( gargoyle的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
deft
|
|
| adj.灵巧的，熟练的（a deft hand 能手） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
sculptor
|
|
| n.雕刻家，雕刻家 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
57
frayed
|
|
| adj.磨损的v.（使布、绳等）磨损，磨破( fray的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
58
ministry
|
|
| n.(政府的)部；牧师 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
59
repelled
|
|
| v.击退( repel的过去式和过去分词 )；使厌恶；排斥；推开 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
60
loathe
|
|
| v.厌恶，嫌恶 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
61
dread
|
|
| vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
62
utilized
|
|
| v.利用，使用( utilize的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
63
fig
|
|
| n.无花果(树) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
64
disposition
|
|
| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |