CHAPTER 6

 All that golden summer on the threshold of my manhood was filled by Mary. I loved her with the love of a boy and a man. Either I was with Mary or I was hoping and planning to be with Mary or I was full of some vivid[Pg 54] new impression of her or some enigmatical speech, some pregnant nothing, some glance or gesture engaged and perplexed¹ my mind. In those days I slept the profound sweet sleep of youth, but whenever that deep flow broke towards the shallows, as I sank into it at night and came out of it at morning, I passed through dreams of Mary to and from a world of waking thought of her.

 

There must have been days of friendly intercourse² when it seemed we talked nothings and wandered and meandered³ among subjects, but always we had our eyes on one another. And afterwards I would spend long hours in recalling and analyzing⁴ those nothings, questioning their nothingness, making out of things too submerged and impalpable for the rough drags of recollection, promises and indications. I would invent ingenious things to say, things pushing out suddenly from nothingness to extreme significance. I rehearsed a hundred declarations.

 

It was easy for us to be very much together. We were very free that summer and life was all leisure. Lady Ladislaw was busied with her own concerns; she sometimes went away for two or three days leaving no one but an attenuated⁵ governess with even the shadow of a claim to interfere⁶ with Mary. Moreover she was used to seeing me with her children at Burnmore; we were still in her eyes no more than children.... And also perhaps she did not greatly mind if indeed we did a little fall in love together. To her that may have seemed a very natural and slight and transitory possibility....

 

One afternoon of warm shadows in the wood near the red-lacquered Chinese bridge, we two were alone together and we fell silent. I was trembling and full of a wild courage. I can feel now the exquisite⁷ surmise⁸, the doubt of that moment. Our eyes met. She looked up at me with an unwonted touch of fear in her expression and I laid my hands on her. She did not recoil⁹, she stood mute with her lips pressed together, looking at me steadfastly¹⁰. I can feel that moment now as a tremendous hesitation¹¹, blank and yet full of light and life, like a clear sky in the moment before dawn....

 

She made a little move towards me. Impulsively¹², with no word said, we kissed.

1 perplexed   

adj.不知所措的

参考例句：

• The farmer felt the cow,went away,returned,sorely perplexed,always afraid of being cheated.那农民摸摸那头牛，走了又回来，犹豫不决，总怕上当受骗。
• The child was perplexed by the intricate plot of the story.这孩子被那头绪纷繁的故事弄得迷惑不解。

2 intercourse   

n.性交；交流，交往，交际

参考例句：

• The magazine becomes a cultural medium of intercourse between the two peoples.该杂志成为两民族间文化交流的媒介。
• There was close intercourse between them.他们过往很密。

3 meandered   

（指溪流、河流等）蜿蜒而流( meander的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• A stream meandered towards the sea. 一条小河蜿蜒地流向大海。
• The small river meandered in lazy curves down the centre. 小河缓缓地绕着中心地区迤逦流过。

4 analyzing   

v.分析；分析( analyze的现在分词 )；分解；解释；对…进行心理分析n.分析

参考例句：

• Analyzing the date of some socialist countries presents even greater problem s. 分析某些社会主义国家的统计数据，暴露出的问题甚至更大。 来自辞典例句
• He undoubtedly was not far off the mark in analyzing its predictions. 当然，他对其预测所作的分析倒也八九不离十。 来自辞典例句

5 attenuated   

v.（使）变细( attenuate的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）变薄；（使）变小；减弱

参考例句：

• an attenuated form of the virus 毒性已衰减的病毒
• You're a seraphic suggestion of attenuated thought . 你的思想是轻灵得如同天使一般的。 来自辞典例句

6 interfere   

v.(in)干涉，干预；(with)妨碍，打扰

参考例句：

• If we interfere, it may do more harm than good.如果我们干预的话，可能弊多利少。
• When others interfere in the affair,it always makes troubles. 别人一卷入这一事件，棘手的事情就来了。

7 exquisite   

adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的

参考例句：

• I was admiring the exquisite workmanship in the mosaic.我当时正在欣赏镶嵌画的精致做工。
• I still remember the exquisite pleasure I experienced in Bali.我依然记得在巴厘岛所经历的那种剧烈的快感。

8 surmise   

v./n.猜想，推测

参考例句：

• It turned out that my surmise was correct.结果表明我的推测没有错。
• I surmise that he will take the job.我推测他会接受这份工作。

9 recoil   

vi.退却，退缩，畏缩

参考例句：

• Most people would recoil at the sight of the snake.许多人看见蛇都会向后退缩。
• Revenge may recoil upon the person who takes it.报复者常会受到报应。

10 steadfastly   

adv.踏实地，不变地；岿然；坚定不渝

参考例句：

• So he sat, with a steadfastly vacant gaze, pausing in his work. 他就像这样坐着，停止了工作，直勾勾地瞪着眼。 来自英汉文学 - 双城记
• Defarge and his wife looked steadfastly at one another. 德伐日和他的妻子彼此凝视了一会儿。 来自英汉文学 - 双城记

11 hesitation   

n.犹豫，踌躇

参考例句：

• After a long hesitation, he told the truth at last.踌躇了半天，他终于直说了。
• There was a certain hesitation in her manner.她的态度有些犹豫不决。

12 impulsively   

adv.冲动地

参考例句：

• She leant forward and kissed him impulsively. 她倾身向前，感情冲动地吻了他。
• Every good, true, vigorous feeling I had gathered came impulsively round him. 我的一切良好、真诚而又强烈的感情都紧紧围绕着他涌现出来。