CHAPTER 5

 It was still in the early afternoon that we came down again across the meandering¹ ice-water streams to our old boat, and pushed off and rowed slowly out of that magic corner back to every-day again....

 

Little we knew to what it was we rowed.

 

As we glided² across the water and rounded the headland and came slowly into view of the hotel again, Mary was reminded of our parting and for a little while she was disposed to make me remain. "If you could stay a little longer," she said,—"Another day? If any harm is done, it's done."

 

"It has been beautiful," I said, "this meeting. It's just as if—when I was so jaded³ and discouraged that I could have put my work aside and despaired altogether,—some power had said, 'Have you forgotten the friendship I gave you?' ... But we shall have had our time. We've met,—we've seen one another, we've heard one another. We've hurt no one...."

 

"You will go?"

 

"To-day. Before sunset. Isn't it right that I should go?"

 

"Stay," she whispered, with a light in her eyes.

 

"No. I dare not."

 

 

She did not speak for a long time.

 

"Of course," she said at last, "you're right. You only said—I would have said it for you if you had not. You're so right, Stephen.... I suppose, poor silly little things, that if you stayed we should certainly begin making love to each other. It would be—necessary. We should fence about a little and then there it would be. No barrier—to stop us. And neither of us wants it to happen. It isn't what we want. You would become urgent, I suppose, and I should be—coquettish. In spite of ourselves that power would make us puppets. As if already we hadn't made love.... I could find it in my heart now.... Stephen I could make you stay....

 

"Oh! Why are we so tormented⁴, Stephen? In the next world we shall meet, and this will trouble us no longer. The love will be there—oh, the love will be there, like something that has at last got itself fully⁵ born, got itself free from some queer clinging seed-case....

 

"We shall be rid of jealousy⁶, Stephen, that inflammation of the mind, that bitterness, that pitiless sore, so that I shan't be tormented by the thought of Rachel and she will be able to tolerate me. She was so sweet and wonderful a girl—with those dark eyes. And I've never done her justice—never. Nor she me. I snatched you from her. I snatched you....

 

"Someday we shall be different.... All this putting oneself round another person like a fence, against everyone else, almost against everything else; it's so wicked, so fierce.

 

"It's so possible to be different. Sometimes now, sometimes for long parts of a day I have no base passions at all—even in this life. To be like that always! But I can't see clearly how these things can be; one dreams of them in a kind of luminous⁷ mist, and if one looks directly at them, they vanish again...."

1 meandering   

蜿蜒的河流，漫步，聊天

参考例句：

• The village seemed deserted except for small boys and a meandering donkey. 整个村子的人都像是逃光了，只留下了几个小男孩和一头正在游游荡荡的小毛驴。 来自教父部分
• We often took a walk along the meandering river after supper. 晚饭后我们常沿着那条弯弯曲曲的小河散步。

2 glided   

v.滑动( glide的过去式和过去分词 )；掠过；（鸟或飞机 ） 滑翔

参考例句：

• The President's motorcade glided by. 总统的车队一溜烟开了过去。
• They glided along the wall until they were out of sight. 他们沿着墙壁溜得无影无踪。 来自《简明英汉词典》

3 jaded   

adj.精疲力竭的；厌倦的；（因过饱或过多而）腻烦的；迟钝的

参考例句：

• I felt terribly jaded after working all weekend. 整个周末工作之后我感到疲惫不堪。
• Here is a dish that will revive jaded palates. 这道菜简直可以恢复迟钝的味觉。 来自《简明英汉词典》

4 tormented   

饱受折磨的

参考例句：

• The knowledge of his guilt tormented him. 知道了自己的罪责使他非常痛苦。
• He had lain awake all night, tormented by jealousy. 他彻夜未眠，深受嫉妒的折磨。

5 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

6 jealousy   

n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌

参考例句：

• Some women have a disposition to jealousy.有些女人生性爱妒忌。
• I can't support your jealousy any longer.我再也无法忍受你的嫉妒了。

7 luminous   

adj.发光的，发亮的；光明的；明白易懂的；有启发的

参考例句：

• There are luminous knobs on all the doors in my house.我家所有门上都安有夜光把手。
• Most clocks and watches in this shop are in luminous paint.这家商店出售的大多数钟表都涂了发光漆。