CHAPTER XIV. PAUSE.

 These thoughts dwelt long with Sterling¹; and for a good while, I fancy, kept possession of the proscenium of his mind; madly parading there, to the exclusion² of all else,—coloring all else with their own black hues³. He was young, rich in the power to be miserable⁴ or otherwise; and this was his first grand sorrow which had now fallen upon him.

 

An important spiritual crisis, coming at any rate in some form, had hereby suddenly in a very sad form come. No doubt, as youth was passing into manhood in these Tropical seclusions⁵, and higher wants were awakening⁶ in his mind, and years and reflection were adding new insight and admonition, much in his young way of thought and action lay already under ban with him, and repentances enough over many things were not wanting. But here on a sudden had all repentances, as it were, dashed themselves together into one grand whirlwind of repentance⁷; and his past life was fallen wholly as into a state of reprobation⁸. A great remorseful¹⁰ misery¹¹ had come upon him. Suddenly, as with a sudden lightning-stroke, it had kindled¹² into conflagration¹³ all the ruined structure of his past life; such ruin had to blaze and flame round him, in the painfulest manner, till it went out in black ashes. His democratic philosophies, and mutinous¹⁴ radicalisms, already falling doomed¹⁶ in his thoughts, had reached their consummation and final condemnation¹⁷ here. It was all so rash, imprudent, arrogant¹⁸, all that; false, or but half true; inapplicable wholly as a rule of noble conduct;—and it has ended thus. Woe¹⁹ on it! Another guidance must be found in life, or life is impossible!—

 

It is evident, Sterling's thoughts had already, since the old days of the "black dragoon," much modified themselves. We perceive that, by mere²⁰ increase of experience and length of time, the opposite and much deeper side of the question, which also has its adamantine basis of truth, was in turn coming into play; and in fine that a Philosophy of Denial, and world illuminated²¹ merely by the flames of Destruction, could never have permanently²² been the resting-place of such a man. Those pilgrimings to Coleridge, years ago, indicate deeper wants beginning to be felt, and important ulterior resolutions becoming inevitable²³ for him. If in your own soul there is any tone of the "Eternal Melodies," you cannot live forever in those poor outer, transitory grindings and discords²⁴; you will have to struggle inwards and upwards²⁵, in search of some diviner home for yourself!—Coleridge's prophetic moonshine, Torrijos's sad tragedy: those were important occurrences in Sterling's life. But, on the whole, there was a big Ocean for him, with impetuous Gulf-streams, and a doomed voyage in quest of the Atlantis, before either of those arose as lights on the horizon. As important beacon-lights let us count them nevertheless;—signal-dates they form to us, at lowest. We may reckon this Torrijos tragedy the crisis of Sterling's history; the turning-point, which modified, in the most important and by no means wholly in the most favorable manner, all the subsequent stages of it.

 

Old Radicalism¹⁵ and mutinous audacious Ethnicism having thus fallen to wreck²⁶, and a mere black world of misery and remorse⁹ now disclosing itself, whatsoever²⁷ of natural piety²⁸ to God and man, whatsoever of pity and reverence²⁹, of awe³⁰ and devout³¹ hope was in Sterling's heart now awoke into new activity; and strove for some due utterance³² and predominance. His Letters, in these months, speak of earnest religious studies and efforts;—of attempts by prayer and longing³³ endeavor of all kinds, to struggle his way into the temple, if temple there were, and there find sanctuary³⁴. 10 The realities were grown so haggard; life a field of black ashes, if there rose no temple anywhere on it! Why, like a fated Orestes, is man so whipt by the Furies, and driven madly hither and thither³⁵, if it is not even that he may seek some shrine³⁶, and there make expiation³⁷ and find deliverance?

 

In these circumstances, what a scope for Coleridge's philosophy, above all! "If the bottled moonshine be actually substance? Ah, could one but believe in a Church while finding it incredible! What is faith; what is conviction, credibility, insight? Can a thing be at once known for true, and known for false? 'Reason,' 'Understanding:' is there, then, such an internecine³⁸ war between these two? It was so Coleridge imagined it, the wisest of existing men!"—No, it is not an easy matter (according to Sir Kenelm Digby), this of getting up your "astral spirit" of a thing, and setting it in action, when the thing itself is well burnt to ashes. Poor Sterling; poor sons of Adam in general, in this sad age of cobwebs, worn-out symbolisms, reminiscences and simulacra! Who can tell the struggles of poor Sterling, and his pathless wanderings through these things! Long afterwards, in speech with his Brother, he compared his case in this time to that of "a young lady who has tragically³⁹ lost her lover, and is willing to be half-hoodwinked into a convent, or in any noble or quasi-noble way to escape from a world which has become intolerable."

 

During the summer of 1832, I find traces of attempts towards Anti-Slavery Philanthropy; shadows of extensive schemes in that direction. Half-desperate outlooks, it is likely, towards the refuge of Philanthropism, as a new chivalry⁴⁰ of life. These took no serious hold of so clear an intellect; but they hovered⁴¹ now and afterwards as day-dreams, when life otherwise was shorn of aim;—mirages in the desert, which are found not to be lakes when you put your bucket into them. One thing was clear, the sojourn⁴² in St. Vincent was not to last much longer.

 

Perhaps one might get some scheme raised into life, in Downing Street, for universal Education to the Blacks, preparatory to emancipating⁴³ them? There were a noble work for a man! Then again poor Mrs. Sterling's health, contrary to his own, did not agree with warm moist climates. And again, &c. &c. These were the outer surfaces of the measure; the unconscious pretexts⁴⁴ under which it showed itself to Sterling and was shown by him: but the inner heart and determining cause of it (as frequently in Sterling's life, and in all our lives) was not these. In brief, he had had enough of St. Vincent. The strangling oppressions of his soul were too heavy for him there. Solution lay in Europe, or might lie; not in these remote solitudes⁴⁵ of the sea,—where no shrine or saint's well is to be looked for, no communing of pious⁴⁶ pilgrims journeying together towards a shrine.

 

 

1 sterling   

adj.英币的(纯粹的，货真价实的)；n.英国货币(英镑)

参考例句：

• Could you tell me the current rate for sterling, please?能否请您告诉我现行英国货币的兑换率？
• Sterling has recently been strong,which will help to abate inflationary pressures.英国货币最近非常坚挺，这有助于减轻通胀压力。

2 exclusion   

n.拒绝，排除，排斥，远足，远途旅行

参考例句：

• Don't revise a few topics to the exclusion of all others.不要修改少数论题以致排除所有其他的。
• He plays golf to the exclusion of all other sports.他专打高尔夫球，其他运动一概不参加。

3 hues   

色彩( hue的名词复数 )； 色调； 信仰； 观点

参考例句：

• When the sun rose a hundred prismatic hues were reflected from it. 太阳一出，更把它映得千变万化、异彩缤纷。
• Where maple trees grow, the leaves are often several brilliant hues of red. 在枫树生长的地方，枫叶常常呈现出数种光彩夺目的红色。

4 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

5 seclusions   

n.隔绝，隔离，隐居( seclusion的名词复数 )

参考例句：

6 awakening   

n.觉醒，醒悟 adj.觉醒中的；唤醒的

参考例句：

• the awakening of interest in the environment 对环境产生的兴趣
• People are gradually awakening to their rights. 人们正逐渐意识到自己的权利。

7 repentance   

n.懊悔

参考例句：

• He shows no repentance for what he has done.他对他的所作所为一点也不懊悔。
• Christ is inviting sinners to repentance.基督正在敦请有罪的人悔悟。

8 reprobation   

n.斥责

参考例句：

• Nearly everyone had something to say in reprobation of the views suggested by Owen. 几乎每个人都说几句话来表示反对欧文的见解。 来自辞典例句

9 remorse   

n.痛恨，悔恨，自责

参考例句：

• She had no remorse about what she had said.她对所说的话不后悔。
• He has shown no remorse for his actions.他对自己的行为没有任何悔恨之意。

10 remorseful   

adj.悔恨的

参考例句：

• He represented to the court that the accused was very remorseful.他代被告向法庭陈情说被告十分懊悔。
• The minister well knew--subtle,but remorseful hypocrite that he was!牧师深知这一切——他是一个多么难以捉摸又懊悔不迭的伪君子啊！

11 misery   

n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦

参考例句：

• Business depression usually causes misery among the working class.商业不景气常使工薪阶层受苦。
• He has rescued me from the mire of misery.他把我从苦海里救了出来。

12 kindled   

（使某物）燃烧，着火( kindle的过去式和过去分词 )； 激起（感情等）； 发亮，放光

参考例句：

• We watched as the fire slowly kindled. 我们看着火慢慢地燃烧起来。
• The teacher's praise kindled a spark of hope inside her. 老师的赞扬激起了她内心的希望。

13 conflagration   

n.建筑物或森林大火

参考例句：

• A conflagration in 1947 reduced 90 percent of the houses to ashes.1947年的一场大火，使90%的房屋化为灰烬。
• The light of that conflagration will fade away.这熊熊烈火会渐渐熄灭。

14 mutinous   

adj.叛变的，反抗的；adv.反抗地，叛变地；n.反抗，叛变

参考例句：

• The mutinous sailors took control of the ship.反叛的水手们接管了那艘船。
• His own army,stung by defeats,is mutinous.经历失败的痛楚后，他所率军队出现反叛情绪。

15 radicalism   

n. 急进主义, 根本的改革主义

参考例句：

• His radicalism and refusal to compromise isolated him. 他的激进主义与拒绝妥协使他受到孤立。
• Education produced intellectual ferment and the temptations of radicalism. 教育带来知识界的骚动，促使激进主义具有了吸引力。

16 doomed   

命定的

参考例句：

• The court doomed the accused to a long term of imprisonment. 法庭判处被告长期监禁。
• A country ruled by an iron hand is doomed to suffer. 被铁腕人物统治的国家定会遭受不幸的。

17 condemnation   

n.谴责; 定罪

参考例句：

• There was widespread condemnation of the invasion. 那次侵略遭到了人们普遍的谴责。
• The jury's condemnation was a shock to the suspect. 陪审团宣告有罪使嫌疑犯大为震惊。

18 arrogant   

adj.傲慢的，自大的

参考例句：

• You've got to get rid of your arrogant ways.你这骄傲劲儿得好好改改。
• People are waking up that he is arrogant.人们开始认识到他很傲慢。

19 woe   

n.悲哀，苦痛，不幸，困难；int.用来表达悲伤或惊慌

参考例句：

• Our two peoples are brothers sharing weal and woe.我们两国人民是患难与共的兄弟。
• A man is well or woe as he thinks himself so.自认祸是祸，自认福是福。

20 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

21 illuminated   

adj.被照明的；受启迪的

参考例句：

• Floodlights illuminated the stadium. 泛光灯照亮了体育场。
• the illuminated city at night 夜幕中万家灯火的城市

22 permanently   

adv.永恒地，永久地，固定不变地

参考例句：

• The accident left him permanently scarred.那次事故给他留下了永久的伤疤。
• The ship is now permanently moored on the Thames in London.该船现在永久地停泊在伦敦泰晤士河边。

23 inevitable   

adj.不可避免的，必然发生的

参考例句：

• Mary was wearing her inevitable large hat.玛丽戴着她总是戴的那顶大帽子。
• The defeat had inevitable consequences for British policy.战败对英国政策不可避免地产生了影响。

24 discords   

不和（discord的复数形式）

参考例句：

• There are many discords in this family. 在这个家庭里有许多争吵。
• The speaker's opinion discords with the principles of this society. 演讲者的意见与本会的原则不符。

25 upwards   

adv.向上，在更高处...以上

参考例句：

• The trend of prices is still upwards.物价的趋向是仍在上涨。
• The smoke rose straight upwards.烟一直向上升。

26 wreck   

n.失事，遇难；沉船；vt.(船等)失事，遇难

参考例句：

• Weather may have been a factor in the wreck.天气可能是造成这次失事的原因之一。
• No one can wreck the friendship between us.没有人能够破坏我们之间的友谊。

27 whatsoever   

adv.（用于否定句中以加强语气）任何；pron.无论什么

参考例句：

• There's no reason whatsoever to turn down this suggestion.没有任何理由拒绝这个建议。
• All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you,do ye even so to them.你想别人对你怎样，你就怎样对人。

28 piety   

n.虔诚，虔敬

参考例句：

• They were drawn to the church not by piety but by curiosity.他们去教堂不是出于虔诚而是出于好奇。
• Experience makes us see an enormous difference between piety and goodness.经验使我们看到虔诚与善意之间有着巨大的区别。

29 reverence   

n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬

参考例句：

• He was a bishop who was held in reverence by all.他是一位被大家都尊敬的主教。
• We reverence tradition but will not be fettered by it.我们尊重传统，但不被传统所束缚。

30 awe   

n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧

参考例句：

• The sight filled us with awe.这景色使我们大为惊叹。
• The approaching tornado struck awe in our hearts.正在逼近的龙卷风使我们惊恐万分。

31 devout   

adj.虔诚的，虔敬的，衷心的 (n.devoutness)

参考例句：

• His devout Catholicism appeals to ordinary people.他对天主教的虔诚信仰感染了普通民众。
• The devout man prayed daily.那位虔诚的男士每天都祈祷。

32 utterance   

n.用言语表达，话语，言语

参考例句：

• This utterance of his was greeted with bursts of uproarious laughter.他的讲话引起阵阵哄然大笑。
• My voice cleaves to my throat,and sob chokes my utterance.我的噪子哽咽，泣不成声。

33 longing   

n.（for）渴望

参考例句：

• Hearing the tune again sent waves of longing through her.再次听到那首曲子使她胸中充满了渴望。
• His heart burned with longing for revenge.他心中燃烧着急欲复仇的怒火。

34 sanctuary   

n.圣所，圣堂，寺庙；禁猎区，保护区

参考例句：

• There was a sanctuary of political refugees behind the hospital.医院后面有一个政治难民的避难所。
• Most countries refuse to give sanctuary to people who hijack aeroplanes.大多数国家拒绝对劫机者提供庇护。

35 thither   

adv.向那里；adj.在那边的，对岸的

参考例句：

• He wandered hither and thither looking for a playmate.他逛来逛去找玩伴。
• He tramped hither and thither.他到处流浪。

36 shrine   

n.圣地，神龛，庙；v.将...置于神龛内，把...奉为神圣

参考例句：

• The shrine was an object of pilgrimage.这处圣地是人们朝圣的目的地。
• They bowed down before the shrine.他们在神龛前鞠躬示敬。

37 expiation   

n.赎罪，补偿

参考例句：

• 'served him right,'said Drouet afterward, even in view of her keen expiation of her error. “那是他活该，"这一场结束时杜洛埃说，尽管那个妻子已竭力要赎前愆。 来自英汉文学 - 嘉莉妹妹
• Jesus made expiation for our sins on the cross. 耶稣在十字架上为我们赎了罪。 来自互联网

38 internecine   

adj.两败俱伤的

参考例句：

• Strife was internecine during the next fortnight.在以后两个星期的冲突中我们两败俱伤。
• Take the concern that metaphysical one-sided point of view observes and treats both,can cause internecine.采取形而上学的片面观点观察和处理二者的关系，就会造成两败俱伤。

39 tragically   

adv. 悲剧地，悲惨地

参考例句：

• Their daughter was tragically killed in a road accident. 他们的女儿不幸死于车祸。
• Her father died tragically in a car crash. 她父亲在一场车祸中惨死。

40 chivalry   

n.骑士气概，侠义；（男人）对女人彬彬有礼，献殷勤

参考例句：

• The Middle Ages were also the great age of chivalry.中世纪也是骑士制度盛行的时代。
• He looked up at them with great chivalry.他非常有礼貌地抬头瞧她们。

41 hovered   

鸟( hover的过去式和过去分词 )； 靠近（某事物）； （人）徘徊； 犹豫

参考例句：

• A hawk hovered over the hill. 一只鹰在小山的上空翱翔。
• A hawk hovered in the blue sky. 一只老鹰在蓝色的天空中翱翔。

42 sojourn   

v./n.旅居，寄居；逗留

参考例句：

• It would be cruel to begrudge your sojourn among flowers and fields.如果嫉妒你逗留在鲜花与田野之间，那将是太不近人情的。
• I am already feeling better for my sojourn here.我在此逗留期间，觉得体力日渐恢复。

43 emancipating   

v.解放某人（尤指摆脱政治、法律或社会的束缚）( emancipate的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• Innovation requires emancipating our minds, seeking truth from facts and keeping pace with the times. 创新就要不断解放思想、实事求是、与时俱进。 来自汉英非文学 - 十六大报告
• The harmonious society is important content of Marx's mankind emancipating thought. 和谐社会是马克思人类解放思想中的重要内容。 来自互联网

44 pretexts   

n.借口，托辞( pretext的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• On various pretexts they all moved off. 他们以各种各样的借口纷纷离开了。 来自辞典例句
• Pretexts and appearances no longer deceive us. 那些托辞与假象再也不会欺骗我们了。 来自辞典例句

45 solitudes   

n.独居( solitude的名词复数 )；孤独；荒僻的地方；人迹罕至的地方

参考例句：

• Africa is going at last to give up the secret of its vast solitudes. 非洲无边无际的荒野的秘密就要被揭穿了。 来自辞典例句
• The scientist has spent six months in the solitudes of the Antarctic. 这位科学家已经在人迹罕至的南极待了六个月了。 来自互联网

46 pious   

adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的

参考例句：

• Alexander is a pious follower of the faith.亚历山大是个虔诚的信徒。
• Her mother was a pious Christian.她母亲是一个虔诚的基督教徒。