A HOPELESS CASE.

Let us, people who are so uncommonly¹ clever and learned, have a great tenderness and pity for the poor folks who are not endowed with the prodigious² talents which we have. I have always had a regard for dunces;—those of my own school-days were amongst the pleasantest of the fellows, and have turned out by no means the dullest in life; whereas many a youth who could turn off Latin hexameters by the yard, and construe³ Greek quite glibly⁴, is no better than a feeble prig now, with not a pennyworth more brains than were in his head before his beard grew.

 

Those poor dunces! Talk of being the last man, ah! what a pang⁵ it must be to be the last boy—huge, misshapen, fourteen years of age,—and "taken up" by a chap who is but six years old, and can't speak quite plain yet!

 

Master Hulker is in that condition at Birch's. He is the most honest, kind, active, plucky⁶, generous creature. He can do many things better than most boys. He can go up a tree, jump, play at cricket, dive and swim perfectly—he can eat twice as much as almost any lady (as Miss Birch well knows), he has a pretty talent at carving⁷ figures with his hack-knife, he makes and paints little coaches, he can take a watch to pieces and put it together again. He can do everything but learn his lesson; and there he sticks at the bottom of the school, hopeless. As the little boys are drafted in from Miss Raby's class, (it is true she is one of the best instructresses in the world,) they enter and hop⁸ over poor Hulker. He would be handed over to the governess only he is too big. Sometimes I used to think, that this desperate stupidity was a stratagem⁹ of the poor rascal¹⁰'s; and that he shammed¹¹ dulness so that he might be degraded into Miss Raby's class: if she would teach me, I know, before George, I would put on a pinafore and a little jacket—but no, it is a natural incapacity for the Latin Grammar.

 

If you could see his grammar, it is a perfect curiosity of dog's ears. The leaves and cover are all curled and ragged¹². Many of the pages are worn away, with the rubbing of his elbows as he sits poring over the hopeless volume, with the blows of his fists as he thumps¹³ it madly, or with the poor fellow's tears. You see him wiping them away with the back of his hand, as he tries and tries, and can't do it.

 

When I think of that Latin Grammar, and that infernal As in Præsenti, and of other things which I was made to learn in my youth: upon my conscience I am surprised that we ever survived it. When one thinks of the boys who have been caned¹⁴ because they could not master that intolerable jargon¹⁵! Good Lord, what a pitiful chorus these poor little creatures send up! Be gentle with them, ye schoolmasters, and only whop those who won't learn.

 

The Doctor has operated upon Hulker (between ourselves), but the boy was so little affected¹⁶ you would have thought he had taken chloroform. Birch is weary of whipping now, and leaves the boy to go his own gait. Prince, when he hears the lesson, and who cannot help making fun of a fool, adopts the sarcastic¹⁷ manner with Master Hulker, and says, "Mr. Hulker, may I take the liberty to inquire if your brilliant intellect has enabled you to perceive the difference between those words which grammarians have defined as substantive¹⁸ and adjective nouns?—if not, perhaps Mr. Ferdinand Timmins will instruct you." And Timmins hops¹⁹ over Hulker's head.

 

I wish Prince would leave off girding at the poor lad. He's an only son, and his mother is a widow woman, who loves him with all her might. There is a famous sneer²⁰ about the suckling of fools and the chronicling of small beer; but remember it was a rascal who uttered it.

 

1 uncommonly   

adv. 稀罕(极，非常)

参考例句：

• an uncommonly gifted child 一个天赋异禀的儿童
• My little Mary was feeling uncommonly empty. 我肚子当时正饿得厉害。

2 prodigious   

adj.惊人的，奇妙的；异常的；巨大的；庞大的

参考例句：

• This business generates cash in prodigious amounts.这种业务收益丰厚。
• He impressed all who met him with his prodigious memory.他惊人的记忆力让所有见过他的人都印象深刻。

3 construe   

v.翻译，解释

参考例句：

• He had tried to construe a passage from Homer.他曾尝试注释荷马著作的一段文字。
• You can construe what he said in a number of different ways.他的话可以有好几种解释。

4 glibly   

adv.流利地，流畅地；满口

参考例句：

• He glibly professed his ignorance of the affair. 他口口声声表白不知道这件事。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• He put ashes on his head, apologized profusely, but then went glibly about his business. 他表示忏悔，满口道歉，但接着又故态复萌了。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

5 pang   

n.剧痛，悲痛，苦闷

参考例句：

• She experienced a sharp pang of disappointment.她经历了失望的巨大痛苦。
• She was beginning to know the pang of disappointed love.她开始尝到了失恋的痛苦。

6 plucky   

adj.勇敢的

参考例句：

• The plucky schoolgirl amazed doctors by hanging on to life for nearly two months.这名勇敢的女生坚持不放弃生命近两个月的精神令医生感到震惊。
• This story featured a plucky heroine.这个故事描述了一个勇敢的女英雄。

7 carving   

n.雕刻品，雕花

参考例句：

• All the furniture in the room had much carving.房间里所有的家具上都有许多雕刻。
• He acquired the craft of wood carving in his native town.他在老家学会了木雕手艺。

8 hop   

n.单脚跳，跳跃；vi.单脚跳，跳跃；着手做某事；vt.跳跃，跃过

参考例句：

• The children had a competition to see who could hop the fastest.孩子们举行比赛，看谁单足跳跃最快。
• How long can you hop on your right foot?你用右脚能跳多远？

9 stratagem   

n.诡计，计谋

参考例句：

• Knit the brows and a stratagem comes to mind.眉头一皱，计上心来。
• Trade discounts may be used as a competitive stratagem to secure customer loyalty.商业折扣可以用作维护顾客忠诚度的一种竞争策略。

10 rascal   

n.流氓；不诚实的人

参考例句：

• If he had done otherwise,I should have thought him a rascal.如果他不这样做，我就认为他是个恶棍。
• The rascal was frightened into holding his tongue.这坏蛋吓得不敢往下说了。

11 shammed   

假装，冒充( sham的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He feigned that he was ill; He shammed a headache. 他假装他生病了；他假装头痛。
• He shammed a headache. 他假装头痛。

12 ragged   

adj.衣衫褴褛的，粗糙的，刺耳的

参考例句：

• A ragged shout went up from the small crowd.这一小群人发出了刺耳的喊叫。
• Ragged clothing infers poverty.破衣烂衫意味着贫穷。

13 thumps   

n.猪肺病；砰的重击声( thump的名词复数 )v.重击， （指心脏）急速跳动( thump的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• Normally the heart movements can be felt as distinct systolic and diastolic thumps. 正常时，能够感觉到心脏的运动是性质截然不同的收缩和舒张的撞击。 来自辞典例句
• These thumps are replaced by thrills when valvular insufficiencies or stenoses or congenital defects are present. 这些撞击在瓣膜闭锁不全或狭窄，或者有先天性缺损时被震颤所代替。 来自辞典例句

14 caned   

vt.用苔杖打（cane的过去式与过去分词形式）

参考例句：

• The gaoler caned the man. 狱卒用藤条鞭打这个人。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• I have caned my son when necessary. 必要时，我就用藤条打儿子一顿。 来自辞典例句

15 jargon   

n.术语，行话

参考例句：

• They will not hear critics with their horrible jargon.他们不愿意听到评论家们那些可怕的行话。
• It is important not to be overawed by the mathematical jargon.要紧的是不要被数学的术语所吓倒.

16 affected   

adj.不自然的，假装的

参考例句：

• She showed an affected interest in our subject.她假装对我们的课题感到兴趣。
• His manners are affected.他的态度不自然。

17 sarcastic   

adj.讥讽的，讽刺的，嘲弄的

参考例句：

• I squashed him with a sarcastic remark.我说了一句讽刺的话把他给镇住了。
• She poked fun at people's shortcomings with sarcastic remarks.她冷嘲热讽地拿别人的缺点开玩笑。

18 substantive   

adj.表示实在的；本质的、实质性的；独立的；n.实词，实名词；独立存在的实体

参考例句：

• They plan to meet again in Rome very soon to begin substantive negotiations.他们计划不久在罗马再次会晤以开始实质性的谈判。
• A president needs substantive advice,but he also requires emotional succor. 一个总统需要实质性的建议，但也需要感情上的支持。

19 hops   

跳上[下]( hop的第三人称单数 )； 单足蹦跳； 齐足（或双足）跳行； 摘葎草花

参考例句：

• The sparrow crossed the lawn in a series of hops. 那麻雀一蹦一跳地穿过草坪。
• It is brewed from malt and hops. 它用麦精和蛇麻草酿成。

20 sneer   

v.轻蔑；嘲笑；n.嘲笑，讥讽的言语

参考例句：

• He said with a sneer.他的话中带有嘲笑之意。
• You may sneer,but a lot of people like this kind of music.你可以嗤之以鼻，但很多人喜欢这种音乐。