The thing was opportune1, almost providential, or so Kate Charlock thought. She came down to the drawing-room, a subdued2 smile on her face. She seemed to fit into the room, to be part and parcel of it, like a pure jewel in a beautiful setting. And yet what a pity it was that no happiness went with all this. The thought flashed through Arnold Rent's mind as he shook hands with her. She had looked fair the last time they met, but now, clad in deepest black, she appeared even more attractive. Rent was not often at a loss for words, but he felt strangely awkward at the moment.
"I hope I am not intruding," he murmured, "but I am going away to-morrow, and I could not leave without telling you how grieved I am at your loss. It must have been a great shock."
The ready tears rose to Kate Charlock's eyes. Although she had troubled little about the boy when he was alive, she had persuaded herself that she had sustained a loss which no lapse3 of time would heal.
"It was a terrible shock," she murmured, "so unexpected. What must you think of me when you remember how I was spending the evening at the very moment——"
"But, of course, you did not know. How could you know?" Rent protested. "I have a much higher opinion of you than that. You must try to bear up. Remember that life has its compensations, even for the most miserable4. You have a beautiful home. I never saw a more charming place."
Mrs. Charlock hesitated a moment.
"I think I had better tell you," she said slowly. "Even this home is not likely to last long. Whatever his faults may be, my husband is a genius, and everybody knows that geniuses are bad men of business. I am afraid I am not altogether blameless myself. I took it for granted that we had plenty of money. When my husband told me last night that he was hopelessly in debt I was positively5 staggered. He says he owes six thousand pounds, and he upbraided6 me bitterly for what he was pleased to call my extravagance. He accused me of being the author of all the mischief7. But I am too much accustomed to his bitter tongue to take much heed8 of that. He always likes to see me well dressed. He has never complained like that before. I suppose he wanted to humiliate9 me. Indeed, he has been far worse since the child died. It is a wicked way to treat a mother. It is refined cruelty to taunt10 me with being away on pleasure when the boy was dying.... Oh, I don't see how I can endure the life which lies before me. So long as we are here, where there is plenty of room and we need not see much of one another, I might manage to rub along. But to go away to a tiny cottage——"
"A cottage?" Rent echoed. "Is your husband mad?"
"Sometimes I almost fear he is," Mrs. Charlock said in a whisper. "Since our loss he has been terrible. And now he has it in his mind to remove to a labourer's cottage and live on a few shillings a week until his debts are paid. Surely no sane11 man could behave in that way! I am ready to retrench12, but when I think of the life that John has mapped out——"
The speaker's voice broke with a pathetic catch. She pressed her handkerchief to her eyes. There was something in the speech that tickled13 Rent. His assumed sympathy was not so keen and clear as it had been. Charlock was a fool, a passionate14 believer in self-sacrifice. And, moreover, he was playing into his hands. But probably he was not moved by any nice considerations of honour and had adopted this course to humiliate the beautiful creature who sat opposite.
"You are going to leave him?" he asked hopefully.
"I am afraid so," Kate Charlock said. "Surely, I can make a living, though I have been brought up in a very useless fashion. If you would only see my husband, you might persuade him——"
"Presently," Rent said. "Just now I am more concerned with yourself. Whatever happens, you will always have a friend in me. And you must not hesitate in the hour of need. Fortunately, I have the command of a considerable amount of money——"
"Oh, I couldn't do that," Kate Charlock cried. "How good and kind you are! If I had only met you before I threw in my lot with John Charlock.... But what am I saying!"
The woman rose to her feet and threw out her hands towards Rent. Her soft, pleading eyes were turned upon him. They were not wholly devoid15 of passion, and impulsively16 Rent stepped forward and took her hands in his. For the moment he had forgotten everything—his characteristic prudence17, even. A sudden recklessness possessed18 him. What he was doing he hardly knew. Then, a moment later, he awoke to the fact that Kate Charlock was in his arms and his lips were pressed passionately19 to hers.
Yet there was no sense of shame in Rent's mind, only a feeling of exultation20 and the knowledge that this woman cared for him. It was impossible to believe otherwise as he looked long and ardently21 into her eyes. Then, very slowly, he put her from him and walked towards the door. The game was his if he did not lose his head.
"This must not happen again," he said. "I am shocked to find that I am as human and weak as the rest. And I have no blame for you, nothing but the deepest and sincerest pity. Oh, what a false and treacherous22 world! It is hateful to think that you must go on living your life here——"
"Not here," Kate Charlock said quietly. "A lonely cottage, where I shall have to do my own work, and sit day by day opposite—— Oh, I cannot bear to think of it! I will go mad. I shall do him some mischief—of that I am certain."
"No, no," Rent said sternly, "not if I can prevent it. I will see your husband now and try to argue with him. If you will show me the way——"
Charlock looked up from his easel with a frown on his face as Rent entered. Then the frown changed to a bitter smile as he bade his visitor be seated. He waited for the latter to speak.
"I have been talking to your wife," Rent began lamely23. "She tells me that you are thinking of leaving."
"Oh, did she? Perhaps she told you that I was up to my eyes in debt, and that I am not going to rest until every penny has been paid. That is why I am leaving and have furnished a small cottage in the neighbourhood. After all, I am not asking my wife very much. For the last three or four years she has had everything that the heart of woman could desire, and now I am asking her to pay the penalty. You can't eat your cake and have it, you know. Really, my good sir, as a man of the world, you ought to applaud my resolution."
"So I do," Rent murmured. "But you will pardon me if I ask you a plain question. People say you are a hard man. They say that your wife's lot is not a happy one. I do hope and trust that in the step you are taking you have no desire to humiliate the lady——"
"Stop!" Charlock cried. "You are going too far. I hear you are fearless and outspoken24. I know you are a man of sense. And seeing you are candid25, let me be candid in return. If I had married a plain, commonplace woman, would you take as much interest in her as you do in the lady whom I have the honour to call my wife? Ah, you are silent. I thought so. Yes, those are very pleading eyes. That is a very sad, sweet countenance26. And doubtless I am a brute27, because I can watch the tears fall from those eyes with a smile on my lips. Did it ever strike you that there may be another side to the question? Oh, I am not going to speak of it. You are quite free to form your own conclusions. And now you have come to persuade me to modify my scheme. Is not that so?"
"I must confess that I had some such idea in my mind," Rent admitted. "It seems so hard upon your wife."
"Oh, I know," Charlock said, the bitter sneer28 still on his face. "It is always the woman who pays. But I am busy now and have no time to discuss this matter. Come and see me again, say to-morrow evening, about eight o'clock. Then you shall have an answer to your question. You are a well-meaning man, but, like most of your class, you have no knowledge of the world and you fail to see the grim humour of the situation. It is rather amusing, don't you think, for a married man to be lectured by a bachelor? Some day, when your time comes——"
Charlock turned to his easel and refused to say another word. With a feeling that he had been baffled, Rent left the house. He walked slowly across the fields, the vision of Kate Charlock's beautiful, pathetic face occupying his mind to the exclusion29 of everything else. He tingled30 as he thought of that passionate caress31. The feeling of hope was drowned in an unreasoning exultation. And yet he ought not to see her again. He had his future to consider. That chapter must be closed for ever. But as he walked along, for the first time in his life, Arnold Rent regretted his aims and the career which he had mapped out for himself since his schooldays.
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1
opportune
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| adj.合适的，适当的 | |
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2
subdued
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| adj. 屈服的，柔和的，减弱的 动词subdue的过去式和过去分词 | |
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3
lapse
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| n.过失，流逝，失效，抛弃信仰，间隔；vi.堕落，停止，失效，流逝；vt.使失效 | |
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4
miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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positively
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| adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实 | |
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6
upbraided
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| v.责备，申斥，谴责( upbraid的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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7
mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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8
heed
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| v.注意，留意；n.注意，留心 | |
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9
humiliate
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| v.使羞辱，使丢脸[同]disgrace | |
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10
taunt
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| n.辱骂，嘲弄；v.嘲弄 | |
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11
sane
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| adj.心智健全的，神志清醒的，明智的，稳健的 | |
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12
retrench
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| v.节省，削减 | |
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13
tickled
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| （使）发痒( tickle的过去式和过去分词 )； （使）愉快，逗乐 | |
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14
passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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15
devoid
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| adj.全无的，缺乏的 | |
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impulsively
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| adv.冲动地 | |
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prudence
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| n.谨慎，精明，节俭 | |
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18
possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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19
passionately
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| ad.热烈地，激烈地 | |
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20
exultation
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| n.狂喜，得意 | |
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21
ardently
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| adv.热心地，热烈地 | |
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22
treacherous
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| adj.不可靠的，有暗藏的危险的；adj.背叛的，背信弃义的 | |
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23
lamely
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| 一瘸一拐地，不完全地 | |
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24
outspoken
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| adj.直言无讳的，坦率的，坦白无隐的 | |
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candid
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| adj.公正的，正直的；坦率的 | |
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countenance
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| n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同 | |
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brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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28
sneer
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| v.轻蔑；嘲笑；n.嘲笑，讥讽的言语 | |
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29
exclusion
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| n.拒绝，排除，排斥，远足，远途旅行 | |
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30
tingled
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| v.有刺痛感( tingle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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31
caress
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| vt./n.爱抚，抚摸 | |
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