CHAPTER 35 THE BURDEN OF CONVENTIONALITY

Of course you will have realized that Elizabeth’s surmise¹ regarding David was entirely² correct.

 

When he made his material embarkation³ at Cape⁴ Town he hadn’t the faintest conception of the mental voyage on which he was embarking⁵, or I am pretty sure he would never have set foot on the ship’s deck, or, at all events would have done so with misgiving⁶. And he had had none. Gay as a schoolboy in quest of adventure, and determined⁷ as that youngster, he had watched the African coast recede⁸ from his sight, had seen Table Mountain dwindle⁹ to a mere¹⁰ speck¹¹, had turned his face in the direction of his new enterprise.

 

First had come the tracing up of his family in America, a tedious enough job, leading him eventually to Brussels.

 

[Pg 256]

 

His arrival in London had brought further business in its train, interviewing solicitors¹²; producing the proofs collected through months of research; answering endless, and what appeared to him totally irrelevant¹³, questions. Next there had been waiting,—waiting in shabby little rooms in Chelsea, when he beguiled¹⁴ the weary hours by walks on the Embankment, in Battersea Park, or on Hampstead Heath, anywhere away from the interminable hum of traffic, from the ceaseless stream of people.

 

More than once he had asked himself what on earth he had done it for? Why he had left the quiet, the sunshine, the colour, the wide spaces of the veldt, for the noise, the fog, the greyness, the confinement¹⁵ of London. More than once he had called himself a fool for his pains, cursed the day idleness had taken him to rummage¹⁶ in the old chest in the storeroom.

 

Then, the swing of the pendulum¹⁷ lifting him towards the anticipation¹⁸ of fulfilled hope, his gloom would be dispelled¹⁹. After all, he would assure himself, it was his birthright for which he was enduring hardship. Only a fool or a weakling would have refused to take up the clue he had [Pg 257]inadvertently discovered. Then, gloom once more overwhelming him, he would demand of himself: Was it his birthright? After all didn’t this same birthright lie in the wide untrammelled spaces of the veldt, the unconventional surroundings, the life of freedom? Wasn’t he attempting to exchange it for a mess of red pottage?

 

But, with the arrival of the long-looked-for document, legal phrases and all, doubts again dispersed²⁰. He had laboured, he had toiled²¹, he had achieved. There was no question now about that birthright. It was his. He held it as surely in his grasp as he held that piece of foolscap paper.

 

Naturally the first thing to do was to go and have a look at it. He had refrained from so doing till his rights thereto had been assured. He bade a far from reluctant farewell to his shabby rooms, and a not overclean landlady²², took the train forthwith to Whortley, arrived at Malford, and the Green Man.

 

And then gradually, imperceptibly, all his doubts had returned, returned, too, in so subtle a manner, that he hardly recognized them for doubts. He was merely bewildered, non-understanding of himself.

 

[Pg 258]

 

It seemed to him totally absurd that he should not be entirely delighted at the thought of his inheritance, yet, if the truth be known, it was beginning to hang like a somewhat weighty millstone round his neck. And the exceeding simple solution of cutting the string that held it there, never dawned upon him.

 

Perhaps, unconsciously, he felt that to do so would be to shirk responsibility; but it is very certain that he was already devoutly²⁵ wishing that he had never sought responsibility. Elizabeth’s careless little remark had added quite an appreciable²⁶ weight to it. It is astonishing how the merest fragment added to an already heavy load will make it almost insupportable. It was, too, the absurdest fragment, the most ridiculous fragment, but there it was, flung carelessly upon him. Mentally, though vaguely²⁷, he saw a million other like fragments, which he told himself shudderingly²⁸ would be added. He saw at least another ton load waiting for him. To those used to these burdens of conventionality they would be a mere featherweight. But to him!

 

He began to enumerate²⁹ the list, to drag forth²³ to clearer vision what he was vaguely perceiving. [Pg 259]To this end he recalled his dinner at Delancey Castle.

 

Dress clothes headed the list. True, they had not been present, but then they should have been. His own ignorance would evidently be a very formidable fragment. Well then, number one, dress clothes, stiff collars and shirt fronts, and all the rest of the paraphernalia³⁰. Number two, servants standing²⁴ in the room while you eat. An abomination! Number three, servants handing you food in silver dishes. An idiotic³¹ custom! Why couldn’t they put the things on the table? Number four, accept everything offered you as indifferently as possible. Avoid thanking a servant. Well, with a bit of practice he might manage that. Number five, water placed before you in glass dishes, which water you were evidently not intended to drink,—he had grasped that much. A purely³² silly convention. Number six, coffee in minute cups that slid about on the saucers, and nowhere to put the elusive³³ fragile things. David went hot and cold at the remembrance. Number seven, no pipes in the drawing-room. He groaned³⁴. This much his own experience had taught him, and taught him within the space of a couple of [Pg 260]hours. And Heaven alone knew how many more fragments there might not be.

 

Of course you might argue, and justly, why think of these conventions at all? Brush them aside. Treat them as non-existent. He was his own master. That is logical and sound reasoning.

 

But no. To David’s mind it behooved³⁵ him, in accepting the responsibility, to accept with it all that appertained thereto. Herein lay that touch of simplicity³⁶, that touch of childlikeness, which, perhaps you may have perceived in him. Therefore it is small wonder that civilization was bearing heavily upon him.

 

Truly a sorry state for a man.

 

1 surmise   

v./n.猜想，推测

参考例句：

• It turned out that my surmise was correct.结果表明我的推测没有错。
• I surmise that he will take the job.我推测他会接受这份工作。

2 entirely   

ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The fire was entirely caused by their neglect of duty. 那场火灾完全是由于他们失职而引起的。
• His life was entirely given up to the educational work. 他的一生统统献给了教育工作。

3 embarkation   

n. 乘船, 搭机, 开船

参考例句：

• Lisbon became the great embarkation point. 里斯本成了最理想的跳板。 来自英语连读（第二部分）
• Good, go aboard please, be about very quickly embarkation. 好了，请上船吧，很快就要开船了。

4 cape   

n.海角，岬；披肩，短披风

参考例句：

• I long for a trip to the Cape of Good Hope.我渴望到好望角去旅行。
• She was wearing a cape over her dress.她在外套上披着一件披肩。

5 embarking   

乘船( embark的现在分词 )； 装载； 从事

参考例句：

• He's embarking on a new career as a writer. 他即将开始新的职业生涯——当一名作家。
• The campaign on which were embarking was backed up by such intricate and detailed maintenance arrangemets. 我们实施的战争，须要如此复杂及详细的维护准备。

6 misgiving   

n.疑虑，担忧，害怕

参考例句：

• She had some misgivings about what she was about to do.她对自己即将要做的事情存有一些顾虑。
• The first words of the text filled us with misgiving.正文开头的文字让我们颇为担心。

7 determined   

adj.坚定的；有决心的

参考例句：

• I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
• He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。

8 recede   

vi.退(去)，渐渐远去；向后倾斜，缩进

参考例句：

• The colleges would recede in importance.大学的重要性会降低。
• He saw that the dirty water had begun to recede.他发现那污浊的水开始往下退了。

9 dwindle   

v.逐渐变小（或减少）

参考例句：

• The factory's workforce has dwindled from over 4,000 to a few hundred.工厂雇员总数已经从4,000多人减少到几百人。
• He is struggling to come to terms with his dwindling authority.他正努力适应自己权力被削弱这一局面。

10 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

11 speck   

n.微粒，小污点，小斑点

参考例句：

• I have not a speck of interest in it.我对它没有任何兴趣。
• The sky is clear and bright without a speck of cloud.天空晴朗，一星星云彩也没有。

12 solicitors   

初级律师( solicitor的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Most solicitors in England and Wales are in private practice . 英格兰和威尔士的大多数律师都是私人执业者。
• The family has instructed solicitors to sue Thomson for compensation. 那家人已经指示律师起诉汤姆森，要求赔偿。

13 irrelevant   

adj.不恰当的，无关系的，不相干的

参考例句：

• That is completely irrelevant to the subject under discussion.这跟讨论的主题完全不相关。
• A question about arithmetic is irrelevant in a music lesson.在音乐课上，一个数学的问题是风马牛不相及的。

14 beguiled   

v.欺骗( beguile的过去式和过去分词 )；使陶醉；使高兴；消磨（时间等）

参考例句：

• She beguiled them into believing her version of events. 她哄骗他们相信了她叙述的事情。
• He beguiled me into signing this contract. 他诱骗我签订了这项合同。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

15 confinement   

n.幽禁，拘留，监禁；分娩；限制，局限

参考例句：

• He spent eleven years in solitary confinement.他度过了11年的单独监禁。
• The date for my wife's confinement was approaching closer and closer.妻子分娩的日子越来越近了。

16 rummage   

v./n.翻寻，仔细检查

参考例句：

• He had a good rummage inside the sofa.他把沙发内部彻底搜寻了一翻。
• The old lady began to rummage in her pocket for her spectacles.老太太开始在口袋里摸索，找她的眼镜。

17 pendulum   

n.摆，钟摆

参考例句：

• The pendulum swung slowly to and fro.钟摆在慢慢地来回摆动。
• He accidentally found that the desk clock did not swing its pendulum.他无意中发现座钟不摇摆了。

18 anticipation   

n.预期，预料，期望

参考例句：

• We waited at the station in anticipation of her arrival.我们在车站等着，期待她的到来。
• The animals grew restless as if in anticipation of an earthquake.各种动物都变得焦躁不安，像是感到了地震即将发生。

19 dispelled   

v.驱散，赶跑( dispel的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• His speech dispelled any fears about his health. 他的发言消除了人们对他身体健康的担心。
• The sun soon dispelled the thick fog. 太阳很快驱散了浓雾。 来自《简明英汉词典》

20 dispersed   

adj. 被驱散的, 被分散的, 散布的

参考例句：

• The clouds dispersed themselves. 云散了。
• After school the children dispersed to their homes. 放学后，孩子们四散回家了。

21 toiled   

长时间或辛苦地工作( toil的过去式和过去分词 )； 艰难缓慢地移动，跋涉

参考例句：

• They toiled up the hill in the blazing sun. 他们冒着炎炎烈日艰难地一步一步爬上山冈。
• He toiled all day long but earned very little. 他整天劳碌但挣得很少。

22 landlady   

n.女房东，女地主

参考例句：

• I heard my landlady creeping stealthily up to my door.我听到我的女房东偷偷地来到我的门前。
• The landlady came over to serve me.女店主过来接待我。

23 forth   

adv.向前；向外，往外

参考例句：

• The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
• He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。

24 standing   

n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的

参考例句：

• After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
• They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。

25 devoutly   

adv.虔诚地，虔敬地，衷心地

参考例句：

• She was a devoutly Catholic. 她是一个虔诚地天主教徒。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• This was not a boast, but a hope, at once bold and devoutly humble. 这不是夸夸其谈，而是一个即大胆而又诚心、谦虚的希望。 来自辞典例句

26 appreciable   

adj.明显的，可见的，可估量的，可觉察的

参考例句：

• There is no appreciable distinction between the twins.在这对孪生子之间看不出有什么明显的差别。
• We bought an appreciable piece of property.我们买下的资产有增值的潜力。

27 vaguely   

adv.含糊地，暖昧地

参考例句：

• He had talked vaguely of going to work abroad.他含糊其词地说了到国外工作的事。
• He looked vaguely before him with unseeing eyes.他迷迷糊糊的望着前面，对一切都视而不见。

28 shudderingly   

参考例句：

• Shudderingly, she acknowledged to herself that she dared not face what lay before her. 她害怕地发抖，她承认自己不敢面对眼前的一切。 来自互联网

29 enumerate   

v.列举，计算，枚举，数

参考例句：

• The heroic deeds of the people's soldiers are too numerous to enumerate.人民子弟兵的英雄事迹举不胜举。
• Its applications are too varied to enumerate.它的用途不胜枚举。

30 paraphernalia   

n.装备；随身用品

参考例句：

• Can you move all your paraphernalia out of the way?你可以把所有的随身物品移开吗？
• All my fishing paraphernalia is in the car.我的鱼具都在汽车里。

31 idiotic   

adj.白痴的

参考例句：

• It is idiotic to go shopping with no money.去买东西而不带钱是很蠢的。
• The child's idiotic deeds caused his family much trouble.那小孩愚蠢的行为给家庭带来许多麻烦。

32 purely   

adv.纯粹地，完全地

参考例句：

• I helped him purely and simply out of friendship.我帮他纯粹是出于友情。
• This disproves the theory that children are purely imitative.这证明认为儿童只会单纯地模仿的理论是站不住脚的。

33 elusive   

adj.难以表达(捉摸)的；令人困惑的；逃避的

参考例句：

• Try to catch the elusive charm of the original in translation.翻译时设法把握住原文中难以捉摸的风韵。
• Interpol have searched all the corners of the earth for the elusive hijackers.国际刑警组织已在世界各地搜查在逃的飞机劫持者。

34 groaned   

v.呻吟( groan的过去式和过去分词 )；发牢骚；抱怨；受苦

参考例句：

• He groaned in anguish. 他痛苦地呻吟。
• The cart groaned under the weight of the piano. 大车在钢琴的重压下嘎吱作响。 来自《简明英汉词典》

35 behooved   

v.适宜( behoove的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• For whose behooved is this done. 做这件事为了谁？ 来自辞典例句
• He spoke courteously, as it behooved. 他应该谦恭地说话。 来自互联网

36 simplicity   

n.简单，简易；朴素；直率，单纯

参考例句：

• She dressed with elegant simplicity.她穿着朴素高雅。
• The beauty of this plan is its simplicity.简明扼要是这个计划的一大特点。