This was on Tuesday. During the rest of the week Bob worked hard. Even a skilled man would have been kept busy by the multitude of details that poured in on the little office. Poor Bob was far from skilled. He felt as awkward amid all these swift and accurate activities as he had when at sixteen it became necessary to force his overgrown frame into a crowded drawing room. He tried very hard, as he always did with everything. When Collins succinctly1 called his attention to a discrepancy2 in his figurings, he smiled his slow, winning, troubled smile, thrust the hair back from his clear eyes, and bent3 his lean athlete's frame again to the labour. He soon discovered that this work demanded speed as well as accuracy. "And I need a ten-acre lot to turn around in," he told himself half humorously. "I'm a regular ice-wagon."
He now came to look back on his college triumphs with an exaggerated but wholesome4 reaction. His athletic5 prowess had given him great prominence6 in college circles. Girls had been flattered at his attention; his classmates had deferred7 to his skill and experience; his juniors had, in the manner of college boys, looked up to him as to a demi-god. Then for the few months of the football season the newspapers had made of him a national character. His picture appeared at least once a week; his opinions were recorded; his physical measurements carefully detailed8. When he appeared on the streets and in hotel lobbies, people were apt to recognize him and whisper furtively9 to one another. Bob was naturally the most modest youth in the world, and he hated a "fuss" after the delightfully10 normal fashion of normal boys, but all this could not fail to have its subtle effect. He went out into the world without conceit11, but confident of his ability to take his place with the best of them.
His first experience showed him wholly second in natural qualifications, in ability to learn, and in training to men subordinate in the business world.
"I'm just plain dub12," he told himself. "I thought myself some pumpkins13 and got all swelled14 up inside because good' food and leisure and heredity gave me a husky build! Football! What good does that do me here? Four out of five of these rivermen are huskier than I am. Me a business man! Why I can't seem even to learn the first principles of the first job of the whole lot! I've _got_ to!" he admonished15; himself grimly. "I _hate_ a fellow who doesn't make good!"' and with a very determined16 set to his handsome chin he hurled17 the whole force of his young energies at those elusive18 figures that somehow _would_ lie.
The week slipped by in this struggle. It was much worse than in the Chicago office. There Bob was allowed all the time he thought he needed. Here one task followed close on the heels of another, without chance for a breathing space or room to take bearings. Bob had to do the best he could, commit the result to a merciful providence19, and seize the next job by the throat.
One morning he awoke with a jump to find it was seven o'clock. He had heard neither whistle, and must have overslept! Hastily he leaped into his clothes, and rushed out into the dining room. There he found the chore-boy leisurely20 feeding a just-lighted kitchen fire. To Bob's exclamation21 of astonishment22 he looked up.
"Sunday," he grinned; "breakfus' at eight."
The week had gone without Bob's having realized the fact.
Mrs. Hallowell came in a moment later, smiling at the winning, handsome young man in her fat and good-humoured manner. Bob was seized with an inspiration.
"Mrs. Hallowell," he said persuasively23, "just let me rummage24 around for five minutes, will you?"
"You that hungry?" she chuckled25. "Law! I'll have breakfast in an hour."
"It isn't that," said Bob; "but I want to get some air to-day. I'm not used to being in an office. I want to steal a hunk of bread, and a few of your good doughnuts and a slice of cheese for breakfast and lunch."
"A cup of hot coffee would do you more good," objected Mrs. Hallowell.
"Please," begged Bob, "and I won't disturb a thing."
"Oh, land! Don't worry about that," said Mrs. Hallowell, "there's teamsters and such in here all times of the day and night. Help yourself."
Five minutes later, Bob, swinging a riverman's canvas lunch bag, was walking rapidly up the River Trail. He did not know whither he was bound; but here at last was a travelled way. It was a brilliant blue and gold morning, the air crisp, the sun warm. The trail led him first across a stretch of stump-dotted wet land with pools and rounded rises, green new grass, and trickling26 streamlets of recently melted snow. Then came a fringe of scrub growth woven into an almost impenetrable tangle--oaks, poplars, willows27, cedar28, tamarack--and through it all an abattis of old slashing--with its rotting, fallen stumps29, its network of tops, its soggy root-holes, its fallen, uprooted30 trees. Along one of these strutted31 a partridge. It clucked at Bob, but refused to move faster, lifting its feet deliberately32 and spreading its fanlike tail. The River Trail here took to poles laid on rough horses. The poles were old and slippery, and none too large. Bob had to walk circumspectly33 to stay on them at all. Shortly, however, he stepped off into the higher country of the hardwoods. Here the spring had passed, scattering34 her fresh green. The tops of the trees were already in half-leaf; the lower branches just budding, so that it seemed the sowing must have been from above. Last year's leaves, softened35 and packed by the snow, covered the ground with an indescribably beautiful and noiseless carpet. Through it pushed the early blossoms of the hepatica. Grackles whistled clearly. Distant redwings gave their celebrated36 imitation of a great multitude. Bluebirds warbled on the wing. The busier chickadees and creepers searched the twigs37 and trunks, interpolating occasional remarks. The sun slanted38 through the forest.
Bob strode on vigorously. His consciousness received these things gratefully, and yet he was more occupied with a sense of physical joy and harmony with the world of out-of-doors than with an analysis of its components39. At one point, however, he paused. The hardwoods had risen over a low hill. Now they opened to show a framed picture of the river, distant and below. In contrast to the modulated40 browns of the tree-trunks, the new green and lilac of the undergrowth and the far-off hills across the way, it showed like a patch of burnished41 blue steel. Logs floated across the vista42, singly, in scattered43 groups, in masses. Again, the river was clear. While Bob watched, a man floated into view. He was standing44 bolt upright and at ease on a log so small that the water lapped over its top. From this distance Bob could but just make it out. The man leaned carelessly on his peavy. Across the vista he floated, graceful45 and motionless, on his way from the driving camp to the mill.
Bob gave a whistle of admiration46, and walked on.
"I wish some of our oarsmen could see that," he said to himself. "They're always guying the fellows that tip over their cranky little shells."
He stopped short.
"I couldn't do it," he cried aloud; "nor I couldn't learn to do it. I sure _am_ a dub!"
He trudged47 on, his spirits again at the ebb48. The brightness of the day had dimmed. Indeed, physically49, a change had taken place. Over the sun banked clouds had drawn50. With the disappearance51 of the sunlight a little breeze, before but a pleasant and wandering companion to the birds, became cold and draughty. The leaf carpet proved to be soggy; and as for the birds themselves, their whistles suddenly grew plaintive53 as though with the portent54 of late autumn.
This sudden transformation55, usual enough with every passing cloud in the childhood of the spring, reacted still further on Bob's spirits. He trudged doggedly56 on. After a time a gleam of water caught his attention to the left. He deserted57 the River Trail, descended58 a slope, pushed his way through a thicket59 of tamaracks growing out from wire grass and puddles60, and found himself on the shores of a round lake.
It was a small body of water, completely surrounded by tall, dead brown grasses. These were in turn fringed by melancholy61 tamaracks. The water was dark slate62 colour, and ruffled63 angrily by the breeze which here in the open developed some slight strength. It reminded Bob of a "bottomless" lake pointed64 out many years before to his childish credulity. A lonesome hell diver flipped65 down out of sight as Bob appeared.
The wet ground swayed and bent alarmingly under his tread. A stub attracted him. He perched on the end of it, his feet suspended above the wet, and abandoned himself to reflection. The lonesome diver reappeared. The breeze rustled66 the dead grasses and the tamaracks until they seemed to be shivering in the cold.
Bob was facing himself squarely. This was his first grapple with the world outside. To his direct American mind the problem was simplicity67 in the extreme. An idler is a contemptible68 being. A rich idler is almost beneath contempt. A man's life lies in activity. Activity, outside the artistic69 and professional, means the world of business. All teaching at home and through the homiletic magazines, fashionable at that period, pointed out but one road to success in this world--the beginning at the bottom, as Bob was doing; close application; accuracy; frugality70; honesty; fair dealing71. The homiletic magazines omitted idealism and imagination; but perhaps those qualities are so common in what some people are pleased to call our humdrum72 modern business life that they were taken for granted. If a young man could not succeed in this world, something was wrong with him. Can Bob be blamed that in this baffling and unsuspected incapacity he found a great humility73 of spirit? In his fashion he began to remember trifling74 significances which at the time had meant little to him. Thus, a girl had once told him, half seriously:
"Yes, you're a nice boy, just as everybody tells you; a nice, big, blundering, stupid, Newfoundland-dog boy."
He had laughed good-humouredly, and had forgotten. Now he caught at one word of it. That might explain it; he was just plain stupid! And stupid boys either played polo or drove fancy horses or ran yachts--or occupied ornamental--too ornamental--desks for an hour or so a day. Bob remembered how, as a small boy, he used to hold the ends of the reins75 under the delighted belief that he was driving his father's spirited pair.
"I've outgrown76 holding the reins, thank you," he said aloud in disgust. At the sound of his voice the diver disappeared. Bob laughed and felt a trifle better.
He reviewed himself dispassionately. He could not but admit that he had tried hard enough, and that he had courage. It was just a case of limitation. Bob, for the first time, bumped against the stone wall that hems52 us in on all sides--save toward the sky.
He fell into a profound discouragement; a discouragement that somehow found its prototype in the mournful little lake with its leaden water, its cold breeze, its whispering, dried marsh77 grasses, its funereal78 tamaracks, and its lonesome diver.
1 succinctly | |
adv.简洁地;简洁地,简便地 | |
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2 discrepancy | |
n.不同;不符;差异;矛盾 | |
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3 bent | |
n.爱好,癖好;adj.弯的;决心的,一心的 | |
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4 wholesome | |
adj.适合;卫生的;有益健康的;显示身心健康的 | |
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5 athletic | |
adj.擅长运动的,强健的;活跃的,体格健壮的 | |
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6 prominence | |
n.突出;显著;杰出;重要 | |
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7 deferred | |
adj.延期的,缓召的v.拖延,延缓,推迟( defer的过去式和过去分词 );服从某人的意愿,遵从 | |
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8 detailed | |
adj.详细的,详尽的,极注意细节的,完全的 | |
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9 furtively | |
adv. 偷偷地, 暗中地 | |
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10 delightfully | |
大喜,欣然 | |
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11 conceit | |
n.自负,自高自大 | |
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12 dub | |
vt.(以某种称号)授予,给...起绰号,复制 | |
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13 pumpkins | |
n.南瓜( pumpkin的名词复数 );南瓜的果肉,南瓜囊 | |
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14 swelled | |
增强( swell的过去式和过去分词 ); 肿胀; (使)凸出; 充满(激情) | |
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15 admonished | |
v.劝告( admonish的过去式和过去分词 );训诫;(温和地)责备;轻责 | |
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16 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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17 hurled | |
v.猛投,用力掷( hurl的过去式和过去分词 );大声叫骂 | |
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18 elusive | |
adj.难以表达(捉摸)的;令人困惑的;逃避的 | |
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19 providence | |
n.深谋远虑,天道,天意;远见;节约;上帝 | |
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20 leisurely | |
adj.悠闲的;从容的,慢慢的 | |
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21 exclamation | |
n.感叹号,惊呼,惊叹词 | |
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22 astonishment | |
n.惊奇,惊异 | |
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23 persuasively | |
adv.口才好地;令人信服地 | |
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24 rummage | |
v./n.翻寻,仔细检查 | |
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25 chuckled | |
轻声地笑( chuckle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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26 trickling | |
n.油画底色含油太多而成泡沫状突起v.滴( trickle的现在分词 );淌;使)慢慢走;缓慢移动 | |
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27 willows | |
n.柳树( willow的名词复数 );柳木 | |
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28 cedar | |
n.雪松,香柏(木) | |
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29 stumps | |
(被砍下的树的)树桩( stump的名词复数 ); 残肢; (板球三柱门的)柱; 残余部分 | |
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30 uprooted | |
v.把(某物)连根拔起( uproot的过去式和过去分词 );根除;赶走;把…赶出家园 | |
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31 strutted | |
趾高气扬地走,高视阔步( strut的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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32 deliberately | |
adv.审慎地;蓄意地;故意地 | |
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33 circumspectly | |
adv.慎重地,留心地 | |
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34 scattering | |
n.[物]散射;散乱,分散;在媒介质中的散播adj.散乱的;分散在不同范围的;广泛扩散的;(选票)数量分散的v.散射(scatter的ing形式);散布;驱散 | |
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35 softened | |
(使)变软( soften的过去式和过去分词 ); 缓解打击; 缓和; 安慰 | |
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36 celebrated | |
adj.有名的,声誉卓著的 | |
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37 twigs | |
细枝,嫩枝( twig的名词复数 ) | |
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38 slanted | |
有偏见的; 倾斜的 | |
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39 components | |
(机器、设备等的)构成要素,零件,成分; 成分( component的名词复数 ); [物理化学]组分; [数学]分量; (混合物的)组成部分 | |
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40 modulated | |
已调整[制]的,被调的 | |
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41 burnished | |
adj.抛光的,光亮的v.擦亮(金属等),磨光( burnish的过去式和过去分词 );被擦亮,磨光 | |
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42 vista | |
n.远景,深景,展望,回想 | |
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43 scattered | |
adj.分散的,稀疏的;散步的;疏疏落落的 | |
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44 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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45 graceful | |
adj.优美的,优雅的;得体的 | |
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46 admiration | |
n.钦佩,赞美,羡慕 | |
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47 trudged | |
vt.& vi.跋涉,吃力地走(trudge的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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48 ebb | |
vi.衰退,减退;n.处于低潮,处于衰退状态 | |
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49 physically | |
adj.物质上,体格上,身体上,按自然规律 | |
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50 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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51 disappearance | |
n.消失,消散,失踪 | |
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52 hems | |
布的褶边,贴边( hem的名词复数 ); 短促的咳嗽 | |
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53 plaintive | |
adj.可怜的,伤心的 | |
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54 portent | |
n.预兆;恶兆;怪事 | |
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55 transformation | |
n.变化;改造;转变 | |
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56 doggedly | |
adv.顽强地,固执地 | |
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57 deserted | |
adj.荒芜的,荒废的,无人的,被遗弃的 | |
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58 descended | |
a.为...后裔的,出身于...的 | |
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59 thicket | |
n.灌木丛,树林 | |
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60 puddles | |
n.水坑, (尤指道路上的)雨水坑( puddle的名词复数 ) | |
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61 melancholy | |
n.忧郁,愁思;adj.令人感伤(沮丧)的,忧郁的 | |
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62 slate | |
n.板岩,石板,石片,石板色,候选人名单;adj.暗蓝灰色的,含板岩的;vt.用石板覆盖,痛打,提名,预订 | |
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63 ruffled | |
adj. 有褶饰边的, 起皱的 动词ruffle的过去式和过去分词 | |
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64 pointed | |
adj.尖的,直截了当的 | |
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65 flipped | |
轻弹( flip的过去式和过去分词 ); 按(开关); 快速翻转; 急挥 | |
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66 rustled | |
v.发出沙沙的声音( rustle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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67 simplicity | |
n.简单,简易;朴素;直率,单纯 | |
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68 contemptible | |
adj.可鄙的,可轻视的,卑劣的 | |
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69 artistic | |
adj.艺术(家)的,美术(家)的;善于艺术创作的 | |
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70 frugality | |
n.节约,节俭 | |
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71 dealing | |
n.经商方法,待人态度 | |
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72 humdrum | |
adj.单调的,乏味的 | |
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73 humility | |
n.谦逊,谦恭 | |
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74 trifling | |
adj.微不足道的;没什么价值的 | |
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75 reins | |
感情,激情; 缰( rein的名词复数 ); 控制手段; 掌管; (成人带着幼儿走路以防其走失时用的)保护带 | |
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76 outgrown | |
长[发展] 得超过(某物)的范围( outgrow的过去分词 ); 长[发展]得不能再要(某物); 长得比…快; 生长速度超过 | |
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77 marsh | |
n.沼泽,湿地 | |
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78 funereal | |
adj.悲哀的;送葬的 | |
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