Darrow had no idea how long he had sat there when he heardAnna's hand on the door. The effort of rising, and ofcomposing his face to meet her, gave him a factitious senseof self-control. He said to himself: "I must decide onsomething----" and that lifted him a hair's breadth abovethe whirling waters.
She came in with a lighter1 step, and he instantly perceivedthat something unforeseen and reassuring2 had happened.
"She's been with me. She came and found me on the terrace.
We've had a long talk and she's explained everything. Ifeel as if I'd never known her before!"Her voice was so moved and tender that it checked his startof apprehension3.
"She's explained----?""It's natural, isn't it, that she should have felt a littlesore at the kind of inspection4 she's been subjected to? Oh,not from you--I don't mean that! But Madame de Chantelle'sopposition--and her sending for Adelaide Painter! She toldme frankly5 she didn't care to owe her husband to AdelaidePainter...She thinks now that her annoyance6 at feelingherself so talked over and scrutinized7 may have shown itselfin her manner to Owen, and set him imagining the insanethings he did...I understand all she must have felt, and Iagree with her that it's best she should go away for awhile. She's made me," Anna summed up, "feel as if I'd beendreadfully thick-skinned and obtuse9!""YOU?""Yes. As if I'd treated her like the bric-a-brac that usedto be sent down here 'on approval,' to see if it would lookwell with the other pieces." She added, with a sudden flushof enthusiasm: "I'm glad she's got it in her to make onefeel like that!"She seemed to wait for Darrow to agree with her, or to putsome other question, and he finally found voice to ask:
"Then you think it's not a final break?""I hope not--I've never hoped it more! I had a word withOwen, too, after I left her, and I think he understands thathe must let her go without insisting on any positivepromise. She's excited...he must let her calm down..."Again she waited, and Darrow said: "Surely you can make himsee that.""She'll help me to--she's to see him, of course, before shegoes. She starts immediately, by the way, with AdelaidePainter, who is motoring over to Francheuil to catch the oneo'clock express--and who, of course, knows nothing of allthis, and is simply to be told that Sophy has been sent forby the Farlows."Darrow mutely signed his comprehension, and she went on:
"Owen is particularly anxious that neither Adelaide nor hisgrandmother should have the least inkling of what'shappened. The need of shielding Sophy will help him tocontrol himself. He's coming to his senses, poor boy; he'sashamed of his wild talk already. He asked me to tell youso; no doubt he'll tell you so himself."Darrow made a movement of protest. "Oh, as to that--thething's not worth another word.""Or another thought, either?" She brightened. "Promise meyou won't even think of it--promise me you won't be hard onhim!"He was finding it easier to smile back at her. "Why shouldyou think it necessary to ask my indulgence for Owen?"She hesitated a moment, her eyes wandering from him. Thenthey came back with a smile. "Perhaps because I need it formyself.""For yourself?""I mean, because I understand better how one can tortureone's self over unrealities."As Darrow listened, the tension of his nerves began torelax. Her gaze, so grave and yet so sweet, was like a deeppool into which he could plunge10 and hide himself from thehard glare of his misery11. As this ecstatic sense envelopedhim he found it more and more difficult to follow her wordsand to frame an answer; but what did anything matter, exceptthat her voice should go on, and the syllables12 fall likesoft touches on his tortured brain?
"Don't you know," she continued, "the bliss13 of waking from abad dream in one's own quiet room, and going slowly over allthe horror without being afraid of it any more? That's whatI'm doing now. And that's why I understand Owen..." Shebroke off, and he felt her touch on his arm. "BECAUSEI'D DREAMED THE HORROR TOO!"He understood her then, and stammered14: "You?""Forgive me! And let me tell you!...It will help you tounderstand Owen...There WERE little things...littlesigns...once I had begun to watch for them: your reluctanceto speak about her...her reserve with you...a sort ofconstraint we'd never seen in her before..."She laughed up at him, and with her hands in his hecontrived to say: "NOW you understand why?""Oh, I understand; of course I understand; and I want you tolaugh at me--with me! Because there were other thingstoo...crazier things still...There was even--last night onthe terrace--her pink cloak...""Her pink cloak?" Now he honestly wondered, and as she sawit she blushed.
"You've forgotten about the cloak? The pink cloak that Owensaw you with at the play in Paris? Yes...yes...I was madenough for that!...It does me good to laugh about it now!
But you ought to know that I'm going to be a jealouswoman...a ridiculously jealous woman...you ought to bewarned of it in time..."He had dropped her hands, and she leaned close and liftedher arms to his neck with one of her rare gestures ofsurrender.
"I don't know why it is; but it makes me happier now to havebeen so foolish!"Her lips were parted in a noiseless laugh and the tremor16 ofher lashes17 made their shadow move on her cheek. He lookedat her through a mist of pain and saw all her offered beautyheld up like a cup to his lips; but as he stooped to it adarkness seemed to fall between them, her arms slipped fromhis shoulders and she drew away from him abruptly18.
"But she WAS with you, then?" she exclaimed; and then,as he stared at her: "Oh, don't say no! Only go and look atyour eyes!"He stood speechless, and she pressed on: "Don't deny it--oh,don't deny it! What will be left for me to imagine if youdo? Don't you see how every single thing cries it out? Owensees it--he saw it again just now! When I told him she'drelented, and would see him, he said: 'Is that Darrow'sdoing too?'"Darrow took the onslaught in silence. He might have spoken,have summoned up the usual phrases of banter19 and denial; hewas not even certain that they might not, for the moment,have served their purpose if he could have uttered themwithout being seen. But he was as conscious of what hadhappened to his face as if he had obeyed Anna's bidding andlooked at himself in the glass. He knew he could no morehide from her what was written there than he could effacefrom his soul the fiery20 record of what he had just livedthrough. There before him, staring him in the eyes, andreflecting itself in all his lineaments, was theoverwhelming fact of Sophy Viner's passion and of the act bywhich she had attested21 it.
Anna was talking again, hurriedly, feverishly22, and his soulwas wrung23 by the anguish24 in her voice. "Do speak at last--you must speak! I don't want to ask you to harm the girl;but you must see that your silence is doing her more harmthan your answering my questions could. You're leaving meonly the worst things to think of her...she'd see thatherself if she were here. What worse injury can you do herthan to make me hate her--to make me feel she's plotted withyou to deceive us?""Oh, not that!" Darrow heard his own voice before he wasaware that he meant to speak. "Yes; I did see her inParis," he went on after a pause; "but I was bound torespect her reason for not wanting it known."Anna paled. "It was she at the theatre that night?""I was with her at the theatre one night.""Why should she have asked you not to say so?""She didn't wish it known that I'd met her.""Why shouldn't she have wished it known?""She had quarrelled with Mrs. Murrett and come over suddenlyto Paris, and she didn't want the Farlows to hear of it. Icame across her by accident, and she asked me not to speakof having seen her.""Because of her quarrel? Because she was ashamed of her partin it?""Oh, no. There was nothing for her to be ashamed of. Butthe Farlows had found the place for her, and she didn't wantthem to know how suddenly she'd had to leave, and how badlyMrs. Murrett had behaved. She was in a terrible plight--thewoman had even kept back her month's salary. She knew theFarlows would be awfully25 upset, and she wanted more time toprepare them."Darrow heard himself speak as though the words had proceededfrom other lips. His explanation sounded plausible26 enough,and he half-fancied Anna's look grew lighter. She waited amoment, as though to be sure he had no more to add; then shesaid: "But the Farlows DID know; they told me all aboutit when they sent her to me."He flushed as if she had laid a deliberate trap for him.
"They may know NOW; they didn't then----""That's no reason for her continuing now to make a mysteryof having met you.""It's the only reason I can give you.""Then I'll go and ask her for one myself." She turned andtook a few steps toward the door.
"Anna!" He started to follow her, and then checked himself.
"Don't do that!""Why not?""It's not like you...not generous..."She stood before him straight and pale, but under her rigidface he saw the tumult27 of her doubt and misery.
"I don't want to be ungenerous; I don't want to pry28 into hersecrets. But things can't be left like this. Wouldn't it bebetter for me to go to her? Surely she'll understand--she'llexplain...It may be some mere15 trifle she's concealing29:
something that would horrify30 the Farlows, but that Ishouldn't see any harm in..." She paused, her eyessearching his face. "A love affair, I suppose...that's it?
You met her with some man at the theatre--and she wasfrightened and begged you to fib about it? Those poor youngthings that have to go about among us like machines--oh, ifyou knew how I pity them!""If you pity her, why not let her go?"She stared. "Let her go--go for good, you mean? Is that thebest you can say for her?""Let things take their course. After all, it's betweenherself and Owen.""And you and me--and Effie, if Owen marries her, and I leavemy child with them! Don't you see the impossibility of whatyou're asking? We're all bound together in this coil."Darrow turned away with a groan31. "Oh, let her go--let hergo.""Then there IS something--something really bad? SheWAS with some one when you met her? Some one with whom shewas----" She broke off, and he saw her struggling with newthoughts. "If it's THAT, of course...Oh, don't yousee," she desperately32 appealed to him, "that I must findout, and that it's too late now for you not to speak? Don'tbe afraid that I'll betray you...I'll never, never let asoul suspect. But I must know the truth, and surely it'sbest for her that I should find it out from you."Darrow waited a moment; then he said slowly: "What youimagine's mere madness. She was at the theatre with me.""With you?" He saw a tremor pass through her, but shecontrolled it instantly and faced him straight andmotionless as a wounded creature in the moment before itfeels its wound. "Why should you both have made a mysteryof that?""I've told you the idea was not mine." He cast about. "Shemay have been afraid that Owen----""But that was not a reason for her asking you to tell methat you hardly knew her--that you hadn't even seen her foryears." She broke off and the blood rose to her face andforehead. "Even if SHE had other reasons, there couldbe only one reason for your obeying her----"Silence fell between them, a silence in which the roomseemed to become suddenly resonant33 with voices. Darrow'sgaze wandered to the window and he noticed that the gale34 oftwo days before had nearly stripped the tops of the lime-trees in the court. Anna had moved away and was resting herelbows against the mantel-piece, her head in her hands. Asshe stood there he took in with a new intensity35 of visionlittle details of her appearance that his eyes had oftencherished: the branching blue veins36 in the backs of herhands, the warm shadow that her hair cast on her ear, andthe colour of the hair itself, dull black with a tawnyunder-surface, like the wings of certain birds. He felt itto be useless to speak.
After a while she lifted her head and said: "I shall not seeher again before she goes."He made no answer, and turning to him she added: "That iswhy she's going, I suppose? Because she loves you and won'tgive you up?"Darrow waited. The paltriness37 of conventional denial was soapparent to him that even if it could have delayed discoveryhe could no longer have resorted to it. Under all his otherfears was the dread8 of dishonouring38 the hour.
"She HAS given me up," he said at last.
收听单词发音 |
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lighter
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| n.打火机，点火器；驳船；v.用驳船运送；light的比较级 | |
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reassuring
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| a.使人消除恐惧和疑虑的，使人放心的 | |
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apprehension
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| n.理解，领悟；逮捕，拘捕；忧虑 | |
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inspection
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| n.检查，审查，检阅 | |
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frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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annoyance
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| n.恼怒，生气，烦恼 | |
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scrutinized
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| v.仔细检查，详审( scrutinize的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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dread
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| vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧 | |
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obtuse
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| adj.钝的；愚钝的 | |
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plunge
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| v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲 | |
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misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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syllables
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| n.音节( syllable的名词复数 ) | |
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bliss
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| n.狂喜，福佑，天赐的福 | |
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stammered
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| v.结巴地说出( stammer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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tremor
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| n.震动，颤动，战栗，兴奋，地震 | |
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lashes
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| n.鞭挞( lash的名词复数 )；鞭子；突然猛烈的一击；急速挥动v.鞭打( lash的第三人称单数 )；煽动；紧系；怒斥 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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banter
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| n.嘲弄，戏谑；v.取笑，逗弄，开玩笑 | |
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fiery
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| adj.燃烧着的，火红的；暴躁的；激烈的 | |
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attested
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| adj.经检验证明无病的，经检验证明无菌的v.证明( attest的过去式和过去分词 )；证实；声称…属实；使宣誓 | |
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feverishly
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| adv. 兴奋地 | |
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wrung
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| 绞( wring的过去式和过去分词 )； 握紧（尤指别人的手）； 把（湿衣服）拧干； 绞掉（水） | |
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anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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awfully
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| adv.可怕地，非常地，极端地 | |
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plausible
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| adj.似真实的，似乎有理的，似乎可信的 | |
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tumult
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| n.喧哗；激动，混乱；吵闹 | |
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pry
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| vi.窥(刺)探，打听；vt.撬动(开，起) | |
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concealing
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，遮住( conceal的现在分词 ) | |
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horrify
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| vt.使恐怖，使恐惧，使惊骇 | |
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groan
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| vi./n.呻吟，抱怨；(发出)呻吟般的声音 | |
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desperately
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| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
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resonant
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| adj.(声音)洪亮的，共鸣的 | |
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gale
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| n.大风，强风，一阵闹声（尤指笑声等） | |
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intensity
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| n.强烈，剧烈；强度；烈度 | |
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veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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paltriness
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| n.不足取，无价值 | |
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dishonouring
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| 使（人、家族等）丧失名誉（dishonour的现在分词形式） | |
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