Chapter 30

    Anna Leath, three days later, sat in Miss Painter's drawing-room in the rue¹ de Matignon.

　　Coming up precipitately² that morning from the country, shehad reached Paris at one o'clock and Miss Painter's landingsome ten minutes later. Miss Painter's mouldy little man-servant, dissembling a napkin under his arm, had mildlyattempted to oppose her entrance; but Anna, insisting, hadgone straight to the dining-room and surprised her friend--who ate as furtively³ as certain animals--over a strange mealof cold mutton and lemonade. Ignoring the embarrassment⁴ shecaused, she had set forth⁵ the object of her journey, andMiss Painter, always hatted and booted for action, hadimmediately hastened out, leaving her to the solitude⁶ of thebare fireless drawing-room with its eternal slip-covers and"bowed" shutters⁷.

　　In this inhospitable obscurity Anna had sat alone for closeupon two hours. Both obscurity and solitude were acceptableto her, and impatient as she was to hear the result of theerrand on which she had despatched her hostess, she desiredstill more to be alone. During her long meditation⁹ in awhite-swathed chair before the muffled¹⁰ hearth¹¹ she had beenable for the first time to clear a way through the darknessand confusion of her thoughts. The way did not go far, andher attempt to trace it was as weak and spasmodic as aconvalescent's first efforts to pick up the thread ofliving. She seemed to herself like some one struggling torise from a long sickness of which it would have been somuch easier to die. At Givre she had fallen into a kind oftorpor, a deadness of soul traversed by wild flashes ofpain; but whether she suffered or whether she was numb¹², sheseemed equally remote from her real living and doing self.

　　It was only the discovery--that very morning--of Owen'sunannounced departure for Paris that had caught her out ofher dream and forced her back to action. The dread¹³ of whatthis flight might imply, and of the consequences that mightresult from it, had roused her to the sense of herresponsibility, and from the moment when she had resolved tofollow her step-son, and had made her rapid preparations forpursuit, her mind had begun to work again, feverishly,fitfully, but still with something of its normal order. Inthe train she had been too agitated¹⁴, too preoccupied¹⁵ withwhat might next await her, to give her thoughts to anythingbut the turning over of dread alternatives; but MissPainter's imperviousness¹⁶ had steadied her, and while shewaited for the sound of the latch-key she resolutelyreturned upon herself.

　　With respect to her outward course she could at least tellherself that she had held to her purpose. She had, aspeople said, "kept up" during the twenty-four hourspreceding George Darrow's departure; had gone with a calmface about her usual business, and even contrived¹⁷ not tooobviously to avoid him. Then, the next day before dawn,from behind the closed shutters where she had kept for halfthe night her dry-eyed vigil, she had heard him drive off tothe train which brought its passengers to Paris in time forthe Calais express.

　　The fact of his taking that train, of his travelling sostraight and far away from her, gave to what had happenedthe implacable outline of reality. He was gone; he wouldnot come back; and her life had ended just as she haddreamed it was beginning. She had no doubt, at first, as tothe absolute inevitability¹⁸ of this conclusion. The man whohad driven away from her house in the autumn dawn was notthe man she had loved; he was a stranger with whom she hadnot a single thought in common. It was terrible, indeed,that he wore the face and spoke¹⁹ in the voice of her friend,and that, as long as he was under one roof with her, themere way in which he moved and looked could bridge at astroke the gulf²⁰ between them. That, no doubt, was the faultof her exaggerated sensibility to outward things: she wasfrightened to see how it enslaved her. A day or two beforeshe had supposed the sense of honour was her deepestsentiment: if she had smiled at the conventions of others itwas because they were too trivial, not because they were toograve. There were certain dishonours²¹ with which she hadnever dreamed that any pact²² could be made: she had had anincorruptible passion for good faith and fairness.

　　She had supposed that, once Darrow was gone, once she wassafe from the danger of seeing and hearing him, this highdevotion would sustain her. She had believed it would bepossible to separate the image of the man she had thoughthim from that of the man he was. She had even foreseen thehour when she might raise a mournful shrine²³ to the memory ofthe Darrow she had loved, without fear that his double'sshadow would desecrate²⁴ it. But now she had begun tounderstand that the two men were really one. The Darrow sheworshipped was inseparable from the Darrow she abhorred²⁵; andthe inevitable²⁶ conclusion was that both must go, and she beleft in the desert of a sorrow without memories...

　　But if the future was thus void, the present was all toofull. Never had blow more complex repercussions²⁷; and toremember Owen was to cease to think of herself. Whatimpulse, what apprehension²⁸, had sent him suddenly to Paris?

　　And why had he thought it needful to conceal²⁹ his going fromher? When Sophy Viner had left, it had been with theunderstanding that he was to await her summons; and itseemed improbable that he would break his pledge, and seekher without leave, unless his lover's intuition had warnedhim of some fresh danger. Anna recalled how quickly he hadread the alarm in her face when he had rushed back to hersitting-room with the news that Miss Viner had promised tosee him again in Paris. To be so promptly³⁰ roused, hissuspicions must have been but half-asleep; and since then,no doubt, if she and Darrow had dissembled, so had he. Toher proud directness it was degrading to think that they hadbeen living together like enemies who spy upon each other'smovements: she felt a desperate longing³¹ for the days whichhad seemed so dull and narrow, but in which she had walkedwith her head high and her eyes unguarded.

　　She had come up to Paris hardly knowing what peril³² shefeared, and still less how she could avert³³ it. If Owenmeant to see Miss Viner--and what other object could hehave?--they must already be together, and it was too late tointerfere. It had indeed occurred to Anna that Paris mightnot be his objective point: that his real purpose in leavingGivre without her knowledge had been to follow Darrow toLondon and exact the truth of him. But even to her alarmedimagination this seemed improbable. She and Darrow, to thelast, had kept up so complete a feint of harmony that,whatever Owen had surmised³⁴, he could scarcely have riskedacting on his suspicions. If he still felt the need of anexplanation, it was almost certainly of Sophy Viner that hewould ask it; and it was in quest of Sophy Viner that Annahad despatched Miss Painter.

　　She had found a blessed refuge from her perplexities in thestolid Adelaide's unawareness³⁶. One could so absolutelycount on Miss Painter's guessing no more than one chose, andyet acting³⁵ astutely³⁷ on such hints as one vouchsafed³⁸ her! Shewas like a well-trained retriever whose interest in his preyceases when he lays it at his master's feet. Anna, onarriving, had explained that Owen's unannounced flight hadmade her fear some fresh misunderstanding between himselfand Miss Viner. In the interests of peace she had thought itbest to follow him; but she hastily added that she did notwish to see Sophy, but only, if possible, to learn from herwhere Owen was. With these brief instructions Miss Painterhad started out; but she was a woman of many occupations,and had given her visitor to understand that beforereturning she should have to call on a friend who had justarrived from Boston, and afterward³⁹ despatch⁸ to anotherexiled compatriot a supply of cranberries⁴⁰ and brandiedpeaches from the American grocery in the Champs Elysees.

　　Gradually, as the moments passed, Anna began to feel thereaction which, in moments of extreme nervous tension,follows on any effort of the will. She seemed to have goneas far as her courage would carry her, and she shrank moreand more from the thought of Miss Painter's return, sincewhatever information the latter brought would necessitatesome fresh decision. What should she say to Owen if shefound him? What could she say that should not betray the onething she would give her life to hide from him? "Give herlife"--how the phrase derided⁴¹ her! It was a gift she wouldnot have bestowed⁴² on her worst enemy. She would not havehad Sophy Viner live the hours she was living now...

　　She tried again to look steadily⁴³ and calmly at the picturethat the image of the girl evoked⁴⁴. She had an idea that sheought to accustom⁴⁵ herself to its contemplation. If life waslike that, why the sooner one got used to it thebetter...But no! Life was not like that. Her adventure wasa hideous⁴⁶ accident. She dreaded⁴⁷ above all the temptation togeneralise from her own case, to doubt the high things shehad lived by and seek a cheap solace⁴⁸ in belittling⁴⁹ what fatehad refused her. There was such love as she had dreamed,and she meant to go on believing in it, and cherishing thethought that she was worthy⁵⁰ of it. What had happened to herwas grotesque⁵¹ and mean and miserable⁵²; but she herself wasnone of these things, and never, never would she make ofherself the mock that fate had made of her...

　　She could not, as yet, bear to think deliberately⁵³ of Darrow;but she kept on repeating to herself "By and bye that willcome too." Even now she was determined⁵⁴ not to let his imagebe distorted by her suffering. As soon as she could, shewould try to single out for remembrance the individualthings she had liked in him before she had loved himaltogether. No "spiritual exercise" devised by thediscipline of piety⁵⁵ could have been more torturing; but itsvery cruelty attracted her. She wanted to wear herself outwith new pains...

1 rue   

n.懊悔，芸香，后悔；v.后悔，悲伤，懊悔

参考例句：

• You'll rue having failed in the examination.你会悔恨考试失败。
• You're going to rue this the longest day that you live.你要终身悔恨不尽呢。

2 precipitately   

adv.猛进地

参考例句：

• The number of civil wars continued to rise until about 1990 and then fell precipitately. 而国内战争的数量在1990年以前都有增加，1990年后则锐减。 来自互联网
• His wife and mistress, until an hour ago and inviolate were slipping precipitately from his control. 他的妻子和情妇，直到一小时前还是安安稳稳、不可侵犯的，现在却猛不防正从他的控制下溜走。 来自互联网

3 furtively   

adv. 偷偷地, 暗中地

参考例句：

• At this some of the others furtively exchanged significant glances. 听他这样说，有几个人心照不宣地彼此对望了一眼。
• Remembering my presence, he furtively dropped it under his chair. 后来想起我在，他便偷偷地把书丢在椅子下。

4 embarrassment   

n.尴尬；使人为难的人(事物)；障碍；窘迫

参考例句：

• She could have died away with embarrassment.她窘迫得要死。
• Coughing at a concert can be a real embarrassment.在音乐会上咳嗽真会使人难堪。

5 forth   

adv.向前；向外，往外

参考例句：

• The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
• He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。

6 solitude   

n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方

参考例句：

• People need a chance to reflect on spiritual matters in solitude. 人们需要独处的机会来反思精神上的事情。
• They searched for a place where they could live in solitude. 他们寻找一个可以过隐居生活的地方。

7 shutters   

百叶窗( shutter的名词复数 )； （照相机的）快门

参考例句：

• The shop-front is fitted with rolling shutters. 那商店的店门装有卷门。
• The shutters thumped the wall in the wind. 在风中百叶窗砰砰地碰在墙上。

8 despatch   

n./v.(dispatch)派遣；发送；n.急件；新闻报道

参考例句：

• The despatch of the task force is purely a contingency measure.派出特遣部队纯粹是应急之举。
• He rushed the despatch through to headquarters.他把急件赶送到总部。

9 meditation   

n.熟虑，（尤指宗教的）默想，沉思，（pl.）冥想录

参考例句：

• This peaceful garden lends itself to meditation.这个恬静的花园适于冥想。
• I'm sorry to interrupt your meditation.很抱歉，我打断了你的沉思。

10 muffled   

adj.（声音）被隔的；听不太清的；（衣服）裹严的；蒙住的v.压抑，捂住( muffle的过去式和过去分词 )；用厚厚的衣帽包着（自己）

参考例句：

• muffled voices from the next room 从隔壁房间里传来的沉闷声音
• There was a muffled explosion somewhere on their right. 在他们的右面什么地方有一声沉闷的爆炸声。 来自《简明英汉词典》

11 hearth   

n.壁炉炉床，壁炉地面

参考例句：

• She came and sat in a chair before the hearth.她走过来，在炉子前面的椅子上坐下。
• She comes to the hearth,and switches on the electric light there.她走到壁炉那里，打开电灯。

12 numb   

adj.麻木的，失去感觉的；v.使麻木

参考例句：

• His fingers were numb with cold.他的手冻得发麻。
• Numb with cold,we urged the weary horses forward.我们冻得发僵，催着疲惫的马继续往前走。

13 dread   

vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧

参考例句：

• We all dread to think what will happen if the company closes.我们都不敢去想一旦公司关门我们该怎么办。
• Her heart was relieved of its blankest dread.她极度恐惧的心理消除了。

14 agitated   

adj.被鼓动的，不安的

参考例句：

• His answers were all mixed up,so agitated was he.他是那样心神不定，回答全乱了。
• She was agitated because her train was an hour late.她乘坐的火车晚点一个小时，她十分焦虑。

15 preoccupied   

adj.全神贯注的，入神的；被抢先占有的；心事重重的v.占据（某人）思想，使对…全神贯注，使专心于( preoccupy的过去式)

参考例句：

• He was too preoccupied with his own thoughts to notice anything wrong. 他只顾想着心事，没注意到有什么不对。
• The question of going to the Mount Tai preoccupied his mind. 去游泰山的问题盘踞在他心头。 来自《简明英汉词典》

16 imperviousness   

不透性；不通透性；不透水

参考例句：

• I tried to erect a facade of imperviousness and self-confidence. 我竭力装出一幅不受外界干扰，十分自信的样子。 来自辞典例句

17 contrived   

adj.不自然的，做作的；虚构的

参考例句：

• There was nothing contrived or calculated about what he said.他说的话里没有任何蓄意捏造的成分。
• The plot seems contrived.情节看起来不真实。

18 inevitability   

n.必然性

参考例句：

• Evolutionism is normally associated with a belief in the inevitability of progress. 进化主义通常和一种相信进步不可避免的看法相联系。
• It is the tide of the times, an inevitability of history. 这是时代的潮流，历史的必然。

19 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

20 gulf   

n.海湾；深渊，鸿沟；分歧，隔阂

参考例句：

• The gulf between the two leaders cannot be bridged.两位领导人之间的鸿沟难以跨越。
• There is a gulf between the two cities.这两座城市间有个海湾。

21 dishonours   

不名誉( dishonour的名词复数 )； 耻辱； 丢脸； 丢脸的人或事

参考例句：

• He who does not honour his wife,dishonours himself. 不尊重妻子的人，自己也不被尊重。
• Whoever stands by the roadway cheering for Queen Victoria dishonours Ireland. 不管谁站在路上为维多利亚女王欢呼，谁就会给爱尔兰带来羞辱。

22 pact   

n.合同，条约，公约，协定

参考例句：

• The two opposition parties made an electoral pact.那两个反对党订了一个有关选举的协定。
• The trade pact between those two countries came to an end.那两国的通商协定宣告结束。

23 shrine   

n.圣地，神龛，庙；v.将...置于神龛内，把...奉为神圣

参考例句：

• The shrine was an object of pilgrimage.这处圣地是人们朝圣的目的地。
• They bowed down before the shrine.他们在神龛前鞠躬示敬。

24 desecrate   

v.供俗用，亵渎，污辱

参考例句：

• The enemy desecrate the church by using it as a stable.敌人亵渎这所教堂,把它当做马厩。
• It's a crime to desecrate the country's flag.玷污国旗是犯罪。

25 abhorred   

v.憎恶( abhor的过去式和过去分词 )；（厌恶地）回避；拒绝；淘汰

参考例句：

• He abhorred the thoughts of stripping me and making me miserable. 他憎恶把我掠夺干净，使我受苦的那个念头。 来自辞典例句
• Each of these oracles hated a particular phrase. Liu the Sage abhorred "Not right for sowing". 二诸葛忌讳“不宜栽种”，三仙姑忌讳“米烂了”。 来自汉英文学 - 中国现代小说

26 inevitable   

adj.不可避免的，必然发生的

参考例句：

• Mary was wearing her inevitable large hat.玛丽戴着她总是戴的那顶大帽子。
• The defeat had inevitable consequences for British policy.战败对英国政策不可避免地产生了影响。

27 repercussions   

n.后果，反响( repercussion的名词复数 )；余波

参考例句：

• The collapse of the company will have repercussions for the whole industry. 这家公司的垮台将会给整个行业造成间接的负面影响。
• Human acts have repercussions far beyond the frontiers of the human world. 人类行为所产生的影响远远超出人类世界的范围。 来自《简明英汉词典》

28 apprehension   

n.理解，领悟；逮捕，拘捕；忧虑

参考例句：

• There were still areas of doubt and her apprehension grew.有些地方仍然存疑，于是她越来越担心。
• She is a girl of weak apprehension.她是一个理解力很差的女孩。

29 conceal   

v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽

参考例句：

• He had to conceal his identity to escape the police.为了躲避警方，他只好隐瞒身份。
• He could hardly conceal his joy at his departure.他几乎掩饰不住临行时的喜悦。

30 promptly   

adv.及时地，敏捷地

参考例句：

• He paid the money back promptly.他立即还了钱。
• She promptly seized the opportunity his absence gave her.她立即抓住了因他不在场给她创造的机会。

31 longing   

n.（for）渴望

参考例句：

• Hearing the tune again sent waves of longing through her.再次听到那首曲子使她胸中充满了渴望。
• His heart burned with longing for revenge.他心中燃烧着急欲复仇的怒火。

32 peril   

n.(严重的)危险；危险的事物

参考例句：

• The refugees were in peril of death from hunger.难民有饿死的危险。
• The embankment is in great peril.河堤岌岌可危。

33 avert   

v.防止，避免；转移(目光、注意力等)

参考例句：

• He managed to avert suspicion.他设法避嫌。
• I would do what I could to avert it.我会尽力去避免发生这种情况。

34 surmised   

v.臆测，推断( surmise的过去式和过去分词 )；揣测；猜想

参考例句：

• From the looks on their faces, I surmised that they had had an argument. 看他们的脸色，我猜想他们之间发生了争执。
• From his letter I surmised that he was unhappy. 我从他的信中推测他并不快乐。 来自《简明英汉词典》

35 acting   

n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的

参考例句：

• Ignore her,she's just acting.别理她，她只是假装的。
• During the seventies,her acting career was in eclipse.在七十年代，她的表演生涯黯然失色。

36 unawareness   

不知觉；不察觉；不意；不留神

参考例句：

• Perhaps that faculty of unawareness was what gave her eyes their transparency. 或许正是这种麻木不仁的本领，使她的眼睛透明见底。

37 astutely   

adv.敏锐地；精明地；敏捷地；伶俐地

参考例句：

• That was what Ada Quonsetf astutely intended. 这正是艾达·昆赛脱狡狯之处。 来自辞典例句
• Freemantle had an idea that the TV session, astutely managed, might well develop into a show. 弗里曼特却自有主意，只要安排得巧妙，电视采访完全可以变成一次示威。 来自辞典例句

38 vouchsafed   

v.给予，赐予( vouchsafe的过去式和过去分词 )；允诺

参考例句：

• He vouchsafed to me certain family secrets. 他让我知道了某些家庭秘密。
• The significance of the event does, indeed, seem vouchsafed. 这个事件看起来确实具有重大意义。 来自辞典例句

39 afterward   

adv.后来；以后

参考例句：

• Let's go to the theatre first and eat afterward. 让我们先去看戏，然后吃饭。
• Afterward,the boy became a very famous artist.后来，这男孩成为一个很有名的艺术家。

40 cranberries   

n.越橘( cranberry的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The tart flavour of the cranberries adds piquancy. 越橘的酸味很可口。
• Look at the fresh cranberries. 你看这些新鲜的蔓越橘。 来自无师自通 校园英语会话

41 derided   

v.取笑，嘲笑( deride的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• His views were derided as old-fashioned. 他的观点被当作旧思想受到嘲弄。
• Gazing up to the darkness I saw myself as a creature driven and derided by vanity. 我抬头疑视着黑暗，感到自己是一个被虚荣心驱使和拨弄的可怜虫。 来自辞典例句

42 bestowed   

赠给，授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• It was a title bestowed upon him by the king. 那是国王赐给他的头衔。
• He considered himself unworthy of the honour they had bestowed on him. 他认为自己不配得到大家赋予他的荣誉。

43 steadily   

adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地

参考例句：

• The scope of man's use of natural resources will steadily grow.人类利用自然资源的广度将日益扩大。
• Our educational reform was steadily led onto the correct path.我们的教学改革慢慢上轨道了。

44 evoked   

[医]诱发的

参考例句：

• The music evoked memories of her youth. 这乐曲勾起了她对青年时代的回忆。
• Her face, though sad, still evoked a feeling of serenity. 她的脸色虽然悲伤，但仍使人感觉安详。

45 accustom   

vt.使适应，使习惯

参考例句：

• It took him a while to accustom himself to the idea.他过了一段时间才习惯这个想法。
• It'shouldn't take long to accustom your students to working in groups.你的学生应该很快就会习惯分组学习的。

46 hideous   

adj.丑陋的，可憎的，可怕的，恐怖的

参考例句：

• The whole experience had been like some hideous nightmare.整个经历就像一场可怕的噩梦。
• They're not like dogs,they're hideous brutes.它们不像狗，是丑陋的畜牲。

47 dreaded   

adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词)

参考例句：

• The dreaded moment had finally arrived. 可怕的时刻终于来到了。
• He dreaded having to spend Christmas in hospital. 他害怕非得在医院过圣诞节不可。 来自《用法词典》

48 solace   

n.安慰；v.使快乐；vt.安慰(物)，缓和

参考例句：

• They sought solace in religion from the harshness of their everyday lives.他们日常生活很艰难，就在宗教中寻求安慰。
• His acting career took a nosedive and he turned to drink for solace.演艺事业突然一落千丈，他便借酒浇愁。

49 belittling   

使显得微小，轻视，贬低( belittle的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• We must be realistic in our self-estimation, neither being conceited nor belittling ourselves. 我们对自己的估计应该实事求是， 不要自高自大，也不要妄自菲薄。
• I find it belittling to be criticized by someone so much younger than me. 有个比我年轻许多的人批评了我，我觉得是小看了我。

50 worthy   

adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的

参考例句：

• I did not esteem him to be worthy of trust.我认为他不值得信赖。
• There occurred nothing that was worthy to be mentioned.没有值得一提的事发生。

51 grotesque   

adj.怪诞的，丑陋的；n.怪诞的图案，怪人（物）

参考例句：

• His face has a grotesque appearance.他的面部表情十分怪。
• Her account of the incident was a grotesque distortion of the truth.她对这件事的陈述是荒诞地歪曲了事实。

52 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

53 deliberately   

adv.审慎地；蓄意地；故意地

参考例句：

• The girl gave the show away deliberately.女孩故意泄露秘密。
• They deliberately shifted off the argument.他们故意回避这个论点。

54 determined   

adj.坚定的；有决心的

参考例句：

• I have determined on going to Tibet after graduation.我已决定毕业后去西藏。
• He determined to view the rooms behind the office.他决定查看一下办公室后面的房间。

55 piety   

n.虔诚，虔敬

参考例句：

• They were drawn to the church not by piety but by curiosity.他们去教堂不是出于虔诚而是出于好奇。
• Experience makes us see an enormous difference between piety and goodness.经验使我们看到虔诚与善意之间有着巨大的区别。