And the roses miscarried!
When Lewisham returned from Vigours' it was already nearly seven. He entered the house with a beating heart. He had expected to find Ethel excited, the roses displayed. But her face was white and jaded1. He was so surprised by this that the greeting upon his lips died away. He was balked2! He went into, the sitting-room3 and there were no roses to be seen. Ethel came past him and stood with her back to him looking out of the window. The suspense4 was suddenly painful....
He was obliged to ask, though he was certain of the answer, "Has nothing come?"
Ethel looked at him. "What did you think had come?"
"Oh! nothing."
She looked out of the window again. "No," she said slowly, "nothing has come."
He tried to think of something to say that might bridge the distance between them, but he could think of nothing. He must wait until the roses came. He took out his books and a gaunt hour passed to supper time. Supper was a chilly5 ceremonial set with necessary over-polite remarks. Disappointment and exasperation6 darkened Lewisham's soul. He began to feel angry with everything--even with her--he perceived she still judged him angry, and that made him angry with her. He was resuming his books and she was helping7 Madam Gadow's servant to clear away, when they heard a rapping at the street door. "They have come at last," he said to himself brightening, and hesitated whether he should bolt or witness her reception of them. The servant was a nuisance. Then he heard Chaffery's voices and whispered a soft "damn!" to himself.
The only thing to do now if the roses came was to slip out into the passage, intercept8 them, and carry them into the bedroom by the door between that and the passage. It would be undesirable9 for Chaffery to witness that phase of sentiment. He might flash some dart10 of ridicule11 that would stick in their memory for ever.
Lewisham tried to show that he did not want a visitor. But Chaffery was in high spirits, and could have warmed a dozen cold welcomes. He sat down without any express invitation in the chair that he preferred.
Before Mr. and Mrs. Chaffery the Lewishams veiled whatever trouble might be between them beneath an insincere cordiality, and Chaffery was soon talking freely, unsuspicious of their crisis. He produced two cigars. "I had a wild moment," he said. "'For once,' said I, 'the honest shall smoke the admirable--or the admirable shall smoke the honest,' whichever you like best. Try one? No? Those austere12 principles of yours! There will be more pleasure then. But really, I would as soon you smoked it as I. For to-night I radiate benevolence13."
He cut the cigar with care, he lit it with ceremony, waiting until nothing but honest wood was burning on the match, and for fully14 a minute he was silent, evolving huge puffs15 of smoke. And then he spoke16 again, punctuating17 his words by varied18 and beautiful spirals. "So far," he said, "I have only trifled with knavery19."
As Lewisham said nothing he resumed after a pause.
"There are three sorts of men in the world, my boy, three and no more--and of women only one. There are happy men and there are knaves21 and fools. Hybrids22 I don't count. And to my mind knaves and fools are very much alike."
He paused again.
"I suppose they are," said Lewisham flatly, and frowned at the fireplace.
Chaffery eyed him. "I am talking wisdom. To-night I am talking a particular brand of wisdom. I am broaching23 some of my oldest and finest, because--as you will find one day--this is a special occasion. And you are distrait24!"
Lewisham looked up. "Birthday?" he said.
"You will see. But I was making golden observations about knaves and fools. I was early convinced of the absolute necessity of righteousness if a man is to be happy. I know it as surely as there is a sun in the heavens. Does that surprise you?"
"Well, it hardly squares--"
"No. I know. I will explain all that. But let me tell you the happy life. Let me give you that, as if I lay on my deathbed and this was a parting gift. In the first place, mental integrity. Prove all things, hold fast to that which is right. Let the world have no illusions for you, no surprises. Nature is full of cruel catastrophes25, man is a physically26 degenerate27 ape, every appetite, every instinct, needs the curb28; salvation29 is not in the nature of things, but whatever salvation there may be is in the nature of man; face all these painful things. I hope you follow that?"
"Go on," said Lewisham, with the debating-society taste for a thesis prevailing30 for a minute over that matter of the roses.
"In youth, exercise and learning; in adolescence31, ambition; and in early manhood, love--no footlight passion." Chaffery was very solemn and insistent32, with a lean extended finger, upon this point.
"Then marriage, young and decent, and then children and stout33 honest work for them, work too for the State in which they live; a life of self-devotion, indeed, and for sunset a decent pride--that is the happy life. Rest assured that is the happy life; the life Natural Selection has been shaping for man since life began. So a man may go happy from the cradle to the grave--at least--passably happy. And to do this needs just three things--a sound body, a sound intelligence, and a sound will ... A sound will."
Chaffery paused on the repetition.
"No other happiness endures. And when all men are wise, all men will seek that life. Fame! Wealth! Art!--the Red Indians worship lunatics, and we are still by way of respecting the milder sorts. But I say that all men who do not lead that happy life are knaves and fools. The physical cripple, you know, poor devil, I count a sort of bodily fool."
"Yes," weighed Lewisham, "I suppose he is."
"Now a fool fails of happiness because of his insufficient34 mind, he miscalculates, he stumbles and hobbles, some cant35 or claptrap whirls him away; he gets passion out of a book and a wife out of the stews36, or he quarrels on a petty score; threats frighten him, vanity beguiles37 him, he fails by blindness. But the knave20 who is not a fool fails against the light. Many knaves are fools also--_most_ are--but some are not. I know--I am a knave but no fool. The essence of your knave is that he lacks the will, the motive38 capacity to seek his own greater good. The knave abhors39 persistence40. Strait is the way and narrow the gate; the knave cannot keep to it and the fool cannot find it."
Lewisham lost something of what Chaffery was saying by reason of a rap outside. He rose, but Ethel was before him. He concealed41 his anxiety as well as he could; and was relieved when he heard the front door close again and her footsteps pass into the bedroom by the passage door. He reverted42 to Chaffery.
"Has it ever occurred to you," asked Chaffery, apparently43 apropos44 of nothing, "that intellectual conviction is no motive at all? Any more than a railway map will run a train a mile."
"Eh?" said Lewisham. "Map--run a train a mile--of course, yes. No, it won't."
"That is precisely45 my case," said Chaffery. "That is the case of your pure knave everywhere. We are not fools--because we know. But yonder runs the highway, windy, hard, and austere, a sort of dry happiness that will endure; and here is the pleasant by-way--lush, my boy, lush, as the poets have it, and with its certain man-trap among the flowers ..."
Ethel returned through the folding doors. She glanced at Lewisham, remained standing46 for awhile, sat down in the basket chair as if to resume some domestic needlework that lay upon the table, then rose and went back into the bedroom.
Chaffery proceeded to expatiate47 on the transitory nature of passion and all glorious and acute experiences. Whole passages of that discourse48 Lewisham did not hear, so intent was he upon those roses. Why had Ethel gone back into the bedroom? Was it possible--? Presently she returned, but she sat down so that he could not see her face.
"If there is one thing to set against the wholesome49 life it is adventure," Chaffery was saying. "But let every adventurer pray for an early death, for with adventure come wounds, and with wounds come sickness, and--except in romances--sickness affects the nervous system. Your nerve goes. Where are you then, my boy?"
"Ssh! what's that?" said Lewisham.
It was a rap at the house door. Heedless of the flow of golden wisdom, he went out at once and admitted a gentleman friend of Madam Gadow, who passed along the passage and vanished down the staircase. When he returned Chaffery was standing to go.
"I could have talked with you longer," he said, "but you have something on your mind, I see. I will not worry you by guessing what. Some day you will remember ..." He said no more, but laid his hand on Lewisham's shoulder.
One might almost fancy he was offended at something.
At any other time Lewisham might have been propitiatory50, but now he offered no apology. Chaffery turned to Ethel and looked at her curiously51 for a moment. "Good-bye," he said, holding out his hand to her.
On the doorstep Chaffery regarded Lewisham with the same curious look, and seemed to weigh some remark. "Good-bye," he said at last with something in his manner that kept Lewisham at the door for a moment looking after his stepfather's receding52 figure. But immediately the roses were uppermost again.
When he re-entered the living room he found Ethel sitting idly at her typewriter, playing with the keys. She got up at his return and sat down in the armchair with a novelette that hid her face. He stared at her, full of questions. After all, then, they had not come. He was intensely disappointed now, he was intensely angry with the ineffable53 young shop-woman in black. He looked at his watch and then again, he took a book and pretended to read and found himself composing a scathing54 speech of remonstrance55 to be delivered on the morrow at the flower-shop. He put his book down, went to his black bag, opened and closed it aimlessly. He glanced covertly56 at Ethel, and found her looking covertly at him. He could not quite understand her expression.
He fidgeted into the bedroom and stopped as dead as a pointer.
He felt an extraordinary persuasion57 of the scent58 of roses. So strong did it seem that he glanced outside the room door, expecting to find a box there, mysteriously arrived. But there was no scent of roses in the passage.
Then he saw close by his foot an enigmatical pale object, and stooping, picked up the creamy petal59 of a rose. He stood with it in his hand, perplexed60 beyond measure. He perceived a slight disorder61 of the valence of the dressing-table and linked it with this petal by a swift intuition.
He made two steps, lifted the valence, and behold62! there lay his roses crushed together!
He gasped63 like a man who plunges64 suddenly into cold water. He remained stooping with the valence raised.
Ethel appeared in the half doorway65 and her, expression was unfamiliar66. He stared at her white face.
"Why on earth did you put my roses here?" he asked.
She stared back at him. Her face reflected his astonishment67.
"Why did you put my roses here?" he asked again.
"Your roses!" she cried, "What! Did _you_ send those roses?"
收听单词发音 |
1
jaded
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| adj.精疲力竭的；厌倦的；（因过饱或过多而）腻烦的；迟钝的 | |
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balked
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| v.畏缩不前，犹豫( balk的过去式和过去分词 )；（指马）不肯跑 | |
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3
sitting-room
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| n.（BrE）客厅，起居室 | |
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suspense
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| n.（对可能发生的事）紧张感，担心，挂虑 | |
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chilly
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| adj.凉快的，寒冷的 | |
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exasperation
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| n.愤慨 | |
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helping
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| n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的，辅助的 | |
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intercept
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| vt.拦截，截住，截击 | |
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undesirable
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| adj.不受欢迎的，不良的，不合意的，讨厌的；n.不受欢迎的人，不良分子 | |
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dart
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| v.猛冲，投掷；n.飞镖，猛冲 | |
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ridicule
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| v.讥讽，挖苦；n.嘲弄 | |
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austere
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| adj.艰苦的；朴素的，朴实无华的；严峻的 | |
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benevolence
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| n.慈悲，捐助 | |
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fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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puffs
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| n.吸( puff的名词复数 )；（烟斗或香烟的）一吸；一缕（烟、蒸汽等）；（呼吸或风的）呼v.使喷出( puff的第三人称单数 )；喷着汽（或烟）移动；吹嘘；吹捧 | |
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16
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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punctuating
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| v.（在文字中）加标点符号，加标点( punctuate的现在分词 )；不时打断某事物 | |
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varied
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| adj.多样的，多变化的 | |
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knavery
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| n.恶行，欺诈的行为 | |
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knave
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| n.流氓；（纸牌中的）杰克 | |
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knaves
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| n.恶棍，无赖( knave的名词复数 )；（纸牌中的）杰克 | |
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22
hybrids
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| n.杂交生成的生物体( hybrid的名词复数 )；杂交植物（或动物）；杂种；（不同事物的）混合物 | |
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23
broaching
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| n.拉削；推削；铰孔；扩孔v.谈起( broach的现在分词 )；打开并开始用；用凿子扩大（或修光）；（在桶上）钻孔取液体 | |
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distrait
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| adj.心不在焉的 | |
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catastrophes
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| n.灾祸( catastrophe的名词复数 )；灾难；不幸事件；困难 | |
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physically
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| adj.物质上，体格上，身体上，按自然规律 | |
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degenerate
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| v.退步，堕落；adj.退步的，堕落的；n.堕落者 | |
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curb
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| n.场外证券市场，场外交易；vt.制止，抑制 | |
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salvation
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| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
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prevailing
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| adj.盛行的；占优势的；主要的 | |
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adolescence
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| n.青春期，青少年 | |
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insistent
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| adj.迫切的，坚持的 | |
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insufficient
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| adj.(for，of)不足的，不够的 | |
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cant
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| n.斜穿，黑话，猛扔 | |
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stews
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| n.炖煮的菜肴( stew的名词复数 )；烦恼，焦虑v.炖( stew的第三人称单数 )；煨；思考；担忧 | |
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37
beguiles
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| v.欺骗( beguile的第三人称单数 )；使陶醉；使高兴；消磨（时间等） | |
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38
motive
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| n.动机，目的；adv.发动的，运动的 | |
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39
abhors
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| v.憎恶( abhor的第三人称单数 )；（厌恶地）回避；拒绝；淘汰 | |
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40
persistence
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| n.坚持，持续，存留 | |
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41
concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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42
reverted
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| 恢复( revert的过去式和过去分词 )； 重提； 回到…上； 归还 | |
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43
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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apropos
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| adv.恰好地；adj.恰当的；关于 | |
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45
precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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46
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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47
expatiate
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| v.细说，详述 | |
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48
discourse
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| n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述 | |
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49
wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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50
propitiatory
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| adj.劝解的；抚慰的；谋求好感的；哄人息怒的 | |
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51
curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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52
receding
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| v.逐渐远离( recede的现在分词 )；向后倾斜；自原处后退或避开别人的注视；尤指问题 | |
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53
ineffable
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| adj.无法表达的，不可言喻的 | |
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54
scathing
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| adj.（言词、文章）严厉的，尖刻的；不留情的adv.严厉地，尖刻地v.伤害，损害（尤指使之枯萎）( scathe的现在分词) | |
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55
remonstrance
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| n抗议，抱怨 | |
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56
covertly
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| adv.偷偷摸摸地 | |
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57
persuasion
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| n.劝说；说服；持有某种信仰的宗派 | |
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58
scent
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| n.气味，香味，香水，线索，嗅觉；v.嗅，发觉 | |
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59
petal
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| n.花瓣 | |
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perplexed
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| adj.不知所措的 | |
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61
disorder
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| n.紊乱，混乱；骚动，骚乱；疾病，失调 | |
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62
behold
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| v.看，注视，看到 | |
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gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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64
plunges
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| n.跳进，投入vt.使投入，使插入，使陷入vi.投入，跳进，陷入v.颠簸( plunge的第三人称单数 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
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65
doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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66
unfamiliar
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| adj.陌生的，不熟悉的 | |
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67
astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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