Felix fell on the seat beside her, burying his face in the folds of her dress; he sobbed1, not with tears, but choking passion. She held him to her heart as if he had been a child, stroking his hair and kissing it, whispering to him, assuring him that her love was his, that she was unchanged. She told him that it was not her fault. A little while before the feast the Baron2 had suddenly broken out into a fit of temper, such as she had never seen him indulge in previously3; the cause was pressure put upon him by his creditors4. Unpleasant truths had escaped him; amongst the rest, his dislike, his positive disapproval5 of the tacit engagement they had entered into.
He declared that if the least outward sign of it appeared before the guests that were expected, he would order Felix to leave the place, and cancel the hearth-friendship, no matter what the consequence. It was clear that he was set upon a wealthy and powerful alliance for her; that the Earl was either coming, or would send his son, he knew; and he knew that nothing so repels6 a possible suitor as the rumour7 that the lady has a previous engagement. In short, he made it a condition of Felix’s presence being tolerated at all, that Aurora8 should carefully abstain9 from showing the slightest attention to him; that she should ignore his existence.
Nor could she prevent Durand following her without a marked refusal to listen to his conversation, a refusal which would most certainly at once have brought about the dreaded10 explosion. She thought it better, under the circumstances, to preserve peace, lest intercourse11 between her and Felix should be entirely12 broken off for ever. This was the secret history of the apparent indifference13 and neglect which had so deeply hurt him. The explanation, accompanied as it was with so many tender expressions and caresses14, soothed15 him; he returned her kisses and became calmer. He could not doubt her, for in his heart he had suspected something of the kind long since.
Yet it was not so much the explanation itself, nor even the love she poured upon him, as the mere16 fact of her presence so near that brought him to himself. The influence of her steadfast17 nature, of her clear, broad, straightforward18 view of things, the decision of her character, the high, unselfish motives19 which animated20 her, all together supplied that which was wanting in himself. His indecision, his too impressionable disposition21, which checked and stayed the force of his talent, and counteracted22 the determination of a naturally iron will; these, as it were, were relieved; in a word, with her he became himself.
How many times he had told her as much! How many times she had replied that it was not herself, but that in which she believed, that was the real cause of this feeling! It was that ancient and true religion; the religion of the primitive23 church, as she found it in the fragments of the Scriptures24 that had come down from the ancients.
Aurora had learnt this faith from childhood; it was, indeed, a tradition of the house preserved unbroken these hundred years in the midst of the jarring creeds25, whose disciples27 threatened and destroyed each other. On the one hand, the gorgeous rite28 of the Vice–Pope, with the priests and the monks29, claimed dominion30, and really held a large share, both over the body and the soul; on the other, the Leaguers, with their bold, harsh, and flowerless creed26, were equally over-bearing and equally bigoted31. Around them the Bushmen wandered without a god; the Romany called upon the full moon. Within courts and cities the gay and the learned alike mocked at all faith, and believed in gold alone.
Cruelty reigned32 everywhere; mercy, except in the name of honour, there was none; humanity was unknown. A few, a very few only, had knowledge of or held to the leading tenets, which, in the time of the ancients, were assented33 to by everyone, such as the duty of humanity to all, the duty of saving and protecting life, of kindness and gentleness. These few, with their pastors34, simple and unassuming, had no power or influence; yet they existed here and there, a living protest against the lawlessness and brutality36 of the time.
Among these the house of Thyma had in former days been conspicuous37, but of late years the barons38 of Thyma had, more from policy than from aught else, rather ignored their ancestral faith, leaning towards the League, which was then powerful in that kingdom. To have acted otherwise would have been to exclude himself from all appointments. But Aurora, learning the old faith at her mother’s knee, had become too deeply imbued39 with its moral beauty to consent to this course. By degrees, as she grew up, it became in her a passion; more than a faith, a passion; the object of her life.
A girl, indeed, can do but little in our iron days, but that little she did. The chapel40 beside the castle, long since fallen to decay, was, at her earnest request, repaired; a pastor35 came and remained as chaplain, and services, of the simplest kind, but serious and full of meaning, took place twice a week. To these she drew as many as possible of the inhabitants of the enclosure; some even came from afar once now and then to attend them. Correspondence was carried on with the remnant of the faith.
That no one might plead ignorance (for there was up to the date no written record) Aurora set herself the task of reducing the traditions which had been handed down to writing. When the manuscript was at last completed it occupied her months to transcribe41 copies of it for circulation; and she still continued to make copies, which were sent by messengers and by the travelling merchants to the markets, and even across the sea. Apart from its intrinsically elevating character, the mere mental labour expended42 on this work had undoubtedly43 strengthened a naturally fine intellect. As she said, it was the faith, the hope that that faith would one day be recognised, which gave her so much influence over others.
Upon this one thing only they differed; Felix did not oppose, did not even argue, he was simply untouched. It was not that he believed in anything else, nor that he doubted; he was merely indifferent. He had too great a natural aptitude44 for the physical sciences, and too clear a mind, to accept that which was taught by the one or the other of the two chief opposing parties. Nor could he join in the ridicule45 and derision of the gay courtiers, for the mystery of existence had impressed him deeply while wandering alone in the forest. But he stood aloof46; he smiled and listened, unconvinced; like the wild creatures of the forest, he had no ears for these matters. He loved Aurora, that was all.
But he felt the influence just the same; with all his powers of mind and contempt of superstitions47 in others, he could not at times shake off the apprehensions48 aroused by untoward49 omens50, as when he stepped upon the adder51 in the woods. Aurora knew nothing of such things; her faith was clear and bright like a star; nothing could alarm her, or bring uneasiness of mind. This beautiful calm, not cold, but glowing with hope and love, soothed him.
That evening, with her hope and love, with her message of trust, she almost persuaded him. He almost turned to what she had so long taught. He almost repented52 of that hardness of heart, that unutterable distance, as it were, between him and other men, which lay at the bottom of his proposed expedition. He opened his lips to confess to her his purpose, and had he done so assuredly she would have persuaded him from it. But in the very act of speaking, he hesitated. It was characteristic of him to do so. Whether she instinctively53 felt that there was something concealed54 from her, or guessed that the discontent she knew he had so long endured was coming to a point, or feared lest what she had told him might drive him to some ill-considered act, she begged him with all the power of her love to do nothing hasty, or in despair, nothing that would separate them. He threw his arms around her, he pressed her closely to him, he trembled with the passion and the struggle within him.
“My lady calls for you, Mademoiselle,” said a voice; it was Aurora’s maid who had kept watch. “She has asked for you some time since. Someone is coming into the garden!”
There was no help for it; Aurora kissed him, and was gone before he could come to himself. How long the interview had lasted (time flies swiftly in such sweet intercourse), or how long he sat there after she left, he could not tell; but when he went out already the dusk was gathering55, the sun had gone down, and in the east the as yet pale orb56 of the moon was rising over the hills. As if in a dream he walked with unsteady steps to the castle stable; his horse had been put back, and the grooms57 suggested to him that it was better not to attempt the forest at night. But he was determined58; he gave them all the coin he had about him, it was not much, but more than they had expected.
They ran beside him to the barrier; advising him as they ran, as he would go, to string his bow and loosen an arrow in the girdle, and above all, not to loiter, or let his horse walk, but to keep him at as sharp a trot59 as he could. The fact that so many wealthy persons had assembled at the castle for the feast would be sure to be known to the banditti (the outlaws60 of the cities and the escaped serfs). They were certain to be on the look out for travellers; let him beware.
His ears tingled61 and his head felt hot, as if the blood had rushed into it (it was the violence of the emotion that he had felt), as he rode from the barrier, hearing, and yet without conscious knowledge of what they said. They watched him up the slope, and saw him disappear from sight under the dark beeches62 of the forest.
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sobbed
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| 哭泣，啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 )； 哭诉，呜咽地说 | |
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baron
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| n.男爵；(商业界等)巨头，大王 | |
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previously
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| adv.以前，先前（地） | |
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creditors
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| n.债权人，债主( creditor的名词复数 ) | |
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disapproval
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| n.反对，不赞成 | |
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repels
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| v.击退( repel的第三人称单数 )；使厌恶；排斥；推开 | |
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rumour
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| n.谣言，谣传，传闻 | |
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aurora
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| n.极光 | |
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abstain
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| v.自制，戒绝，弃权，避免 | |
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dreaded
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| adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词) | |
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intercourse
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| n.性交；交流，交往，交际 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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caresses
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| 爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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soothed
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| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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steadfast
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| adj.固定的，不变的，不动摇的；忠实的；坚贞不移的 | |
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straightforward
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| adj.正直的，坦率的；易懂的，简单的 | |
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motives
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| n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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animated
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| adj.生气勃勃的，活跃的，愉快的 | |
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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counteracted
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| 对抗，抵消( counteract的过去式 ) | |
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primitive
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| adj.原始的；简单的；n.原(始)人，原始事物 | |
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scriptures
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| 经文，圣典( scripture的名词复数 )； 经典 | |
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creeds
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| （尤指宗教）信条，教条( creed的名词复数 ) | |
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creed
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| n.信条；信念，纲领 | |
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disciples
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| n.信徒( disciple的名词复数 )；门徒；耶稣的信徒；（尤指）耶稣十二门徒之一 | |
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rite
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| n.典礼，惯例，习俗 | |
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monks
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| n.修道士，僧侣( monk的名词复数 ) | |
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dominion
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| n.统治，管辖，支配权；领土，版图 | |
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bigoted
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| adj.固执己见的，心胸狭窄的 | |
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reigned
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| vi.当政，统治（reign的过去式形式） | |
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assented
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| 同意，赞成( assent的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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pastors
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| n.（基督教的）牧师( pastor的名词复数 ) | |
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pastor
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| n.牧师，牧人 | |
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brutality
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| n.野蛮的行为，残忍，野蛮 | |
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conspicuous
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| adj.明眼的，惹人注目的；炫耀的，摆阔气的 | |
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barons
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| 男爵( baron的名词复数 )； 巨头； 大王； 大亨 | |
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imbued
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| v.使（某人/某事）充满或激起（感情等）( imbue的过去式和过去分词 )；使充满；灌输；激发（强烈感情或品质等） | |
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chapel
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| n.小教堂，殡仪馆 | |
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transcribe
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| v.抄写，誉写；改编(乐曲)；复制，转录 | |
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expended
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| v.花费( expend的过去式和过去分词 )；使用（钱等）做某事；用光；耗尽 | |
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undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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aptitude
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| n.(学习方面的)才能，资质，天资 | |
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ridicule
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| v.讥讽，挖苦；n.嘲弄 | |
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aloof
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| adj.远离的；冷淡的，漠不关心的 | |
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47
superstitions
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| 迷信，迷信行为( superstition的名词复数 ) | |
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apprehensions
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| 疑惧 | |
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untoward
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| adj.不利的，不幸的，困难重重的 | |
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50
omens
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| n.前兆，预兆( omen的名词复数 ) | |
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51
adder
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| n.蝰蛇；小毒蛇 | |
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52
repented
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| 对（自己的所为）感到懊悔或忏悔( repent的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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53
instinctively
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| adv.本能地 | |
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54
concealed
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| a.隐藏的，隐蔽的 | |
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55
gathering
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| n.集会，聚会，聚集 | |
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56
orb
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| n.太阳；星球；v.弄圆；成球形 | |
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57
grooms
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| n.新郎( groom的名词复数 )；马夫v.照料或梳洗（马等）( groom的第三人称单数 )；使做好准备；训练；（给动物）擦洗 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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59
trot
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| n.疾走，慢跑；n.老太婆；现成译本；(复数）trots:腹泻（与the 连用）；v.小跑，快步走，赶紧 | |
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outlaws
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| 歹徒，亡命之徒( outlaw的名词复数 )； 逃犯 | |
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tingled
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| v.有刺痛感( tingle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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beeches
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| n.山毛榉( beech的名词复数 )；山毛榉木材 | |
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