Alcee Arobin wrote Edna an elaborate note of apology, palpitant with sincerity1. It embarrassed her; for in a cooler, quieter moment it appeared to her, absurd that she should have taken his action so seriously, so dramatically. She felt sure that the significance of the whole occurrence had lain in her own self-consciousness. If she ignored his note it would give undue2 importance to a trivial affair. If she replied to it in a serious spirit it would still leave in his mind the impression that she had in a susceptible3 moment yielded to his influence. After all, it was no great matter to have one’s hand kissed. She was provoked at his having written the apology. She answered in as light and bantering4 a spirit as she fancied it deserved, and said she would be glad to have him look in upon her at work whenever he felt the inclination5 and his business gave him the opportunity.
He responded at once by presenting himself at her home with all his disarming6 naivete. And then there was scarcely a day which followed that she did not see him or was not reminded of him. He was prolific7 in pretexts8. His attitude became one of good-humored subservience9 and tacit adoration10. He was ready at all times to submit to her moods, which were as often kind as they were cold. She grew accustomed to him. They became intimate and friendly by imperceptible degrees, and then by leaps. He sometimes talked in a way that astonished her at first and brought the crimson11 into her face; in a way that pleased her at last, appealing to the animalism that stirred impatiently within her.
There was nothing which so quieted the turmoil12 of Edna’s senses as a visit to Mademoiselle Reisz. It was then, in the presence of that personality which was offensive to her, that the woman, by her divine art, seemed to reach Edna’s spirit and set it free.
It was misty13, with heavy, lowering atmosphere, one afternoon, when Edna climbed the stairs to the pianist’s apartments under the roof. Her clothes were dripping with moisture. She felt chilled and pinched as she entered the room. Mademoiselle was poking14 at a rusty15 stove that smoked a little and warmed the room indifferently. She was endeavoring to heat a pot of chocolate on the stove. The room looked cheerless and dingy16 to Edna as she entered. A bust17 of Beethoven, covered with a hood18 of dust, scowled19 at her from the mantelpiece.
“Ah! here comes the sunlight!” exclaimed Mademoiselle, rising from her knees before the stove. “Now it will be warm and bright enough; I can let the fire alone.”
She closed the stove door with a bang, and approaching, assisted in removing Edna’s dripping mackintosh.
“You are cold; you look miserable20. The chocolate will soon be hot. But would you rather have a taste of brandy? I have scarcely touched the bottle which you brought me for my cold.” A piece of red flannel21 was wrapped around Mademoiselle’s throat; a stiff neck compelled her to hold her head on one side.
“I will take some brandy,” said Edna, shivering as she removed her gloves and overshoes. She drank the liquor from the glass as a man would have done. Then flinging herself upon the uncomfortable sofa she said, “Mademoiselle, I am going to move away from my house on Esplanade Street.”
“Ah!” ejaculated the musician, neither surprised nor especially interested. Nothing ever seemed to astonish her very much. She was endeavoring to adjust the bunch of violets which had become loose from its fastening in her hair. Edna drew her down upon the sofa, and taking a pin from her own hair, secured the shabby artificial flowers in their accustomed place.
“Aren’t you astonished?”
“Passably. Where are you going? to New York? to Iberville? to your father in Mississippi? where?”
“Just two steps away,” laughed Edna, “in a little four-room house around the corner. It looks so cozy22, so inviting23 and restful, whenever I pass by; and it’s for rent. I’m tired looking after that big house. It never seemed like mine, anyway-like home. It’s too much trouble. I have to keep too many servants. I am tired bothering with them.”
“That is not your true reason, ma belle24. There is no use in telling me lies. I don’t know your reason, but you have not told me the truth.” Edna did not protest or endeavor to justify25 herself.
“The house, the money that provides for it, are not mine. Isn’t that enough reason?”
“They are your husband’s ,” returned Mademoiselle, with a shrug26 and a malicious27 elevation28 of the eyebrows29.
“Oh! I see there is no deceiving you. Then let me tell you: It is a caprice. I have a little money of my own from my mother’s estate, which my father sends me by driblets. I won a large sum this winter on the races, and I am beginning to sell my sketches30. Laidpore is more and more pleased with my work; he says it grows in force and individuality. I cannot judge of that myself, but I feel that I have gained in ease and confidence. However, as I said, I have sold a good many through Laidpore. I can live in the tiny house for little or nothing, with one servant. Old Celestine, who works occasionally for me, says she will come stay with me and do my work. I know I shall like it, like the feeling of freedom and independence.”
“What does your husband say?”
“I have not told him yet. I only thought of it this morning. He will think I am demented, no doubt. Perhaps you think so.”
Mademoiselle shook her head slowly. “Your reason is not yet clear to me,” she said.
Neither was it quite clear to Edna herself; but it unfolded itself as she sat for a while in silence. Instinct had prompted her to put away her husband’s bounty31 in casting off her allegiance. She did not know how it would be when he returned. There would have to be an understanding, an explanation. Conditions would some way adjust themselves, she felt; but whatever came, she had resolved never again to belong to another than herself.
“I shall give a grand dinner before I leave the old house!” Edna exclaimed. “You will have to come to it, Mademoiselle. I will give you everything that you like to eat and to drink. We shall sing and laugh and be merry for once.” And she uttered a sigh that came from the very depths of her being.
If Mademoiselle happened to have received a letter from Robert during the interval32 of Edna’s visits, she would give her the letter unsolicited. And she would seat herself at the piano and play as her humor prompted her while the young woman read the letter.
The little stove was roaring; it was red-hot, and the chocolate in the tin sizzled and sputtered33. Edna went forward and opened the stove door, and Mademoiselle rising, took a letter from under the bust of Beethoven and handed it to Edna.
“Another! so soon!” she exclaimed, her eyes filled with delight. “Tell me, Mademoiselle, does he know that I see his letters?”
“Never in the world! He would be angry and would never write to me again if he thought so. Does he write to you? Never a line. Does he send you a message? Never a word. It is because he loves you, poor fool, and is trying to forget you, since you are not free to listen to him or to belong to him.”
“Why do you show me his letters, then?”
“Haven’t you begged for them? Can I refuse you anything? Oh! you cannot deceive me,” and Mademoiselle approached her beloved instrument and began to play. Edna did not at once read the letter. She sat holding it in her hand, while the music penetrated34 her whole being like an effulgence35, warming and brightening the dark places of her soul. It prepared her for joy and exultation36.
“Oh!” she exclaimed, letting the letter fall to the floor. “Why did you not tell me?” She went and grasped Mademoiselle’s hands up from the keys. “Oh! unkind! malicious! Why did you not tell me?”
“That he was coming back? No great news, ma foi. I wonder he did not come long ago.”
“But when, when?” cried Edna, impatiently. “He does not say when.”
“He says ‘very soon.’ You know as much about it as I do; it is all in the letter.”
“But why? Why is he coming? Oh, if I thought-” and she snatched the letter from the floor and turned the pages this way and that way, looking for the reason, which was left untold37.
“If I were young and in love with a man,” said Mademoiselle, turning on the stool and pressing her wiry hands between her knees as she looked down at Edna, who sat on the floor holding the letter, “it seems to me he would have to be some grand esprit; a man with lofty aims and ability to reach them; one who stood high enough to attract the notice of his fellow-men. It seems to me if I were young and in love I should never deem a man of ordinary caliber38 worthy39 of my devotion.”
“Now it is you who are telling lies and seeking to deceive me, Mademoiselle; or else you have never been in love, and know nothing about it. Why,” went on Edna, clasping her knees and looking up into Mademoiselle’s twisted face, “do you suppose a woman knows why she loves? Does she select? Does she say to herself: ‘Go to! Here is a distinguished40 statesman with presidential possibilities; I shall proceed to fall in love with him.’ Or, ‘I shall set my heart upon this musician, whose fame is on every tongue?’ Or, ‘This financier, who controls the world’s money markets?’
“You are purposely misunderstanding me, ma reine. Are you in love with Robert?”
“Yes,” said Edna. It was the first time she had admitted it, and a glow overspread her face, blotching it with red spots.
“Why?” asked her companion. “Why do you love him when you ought not to?”
Edna, with a motion or two, dragged herself on her knees before Mademoiselle Reisz, who took the glowing face between her two hands.
“Why? Because his hair is brown and grows away from his temples; because he opens and shuts his eyes, and his nose is a little out of drawing; because he has two lips and a square chin, and a little finger which he can’t straighten from having played baseball too energetically in his youth. Because-”
“Because you do, in short,” laughed Mademoiselle. “What will you do when he comes back?” she asked.
“Do? Nothing, except feel glad and happy to be alive.”
She was already glad and happy to be alive at the mere41 thought of his return. The murky42, lowering sky, which had depressed43 her a few hours before, seemed bracing44 and invigorating as she splashed through the streets on her way home.
She stopped at a confectioner’s and ordered a huge box of bonbons45 for the children in Iberville. She slipped a card in the box, on which she scribbled46 a tender message and sent an abundance of kisses.
Before dinner in the evening Edna wrote a charming letter to her husband, telling him of her intention to move for a while into the little house around the block, and to give a farewell dinner before leaving, regretting that he was not there to share it, to help out with the menu and assist her in entertaining the guests. Her letter was brilliant and brimming with cheerfulness.
收听单词发音 |
1
sincerity
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| n.真诚，诚意；真实 | |
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undue
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| adj.过分的；不适当的；未到期的 | |
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susceptible
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| adj.过敏的，敏感的；易动感情的，易受感动的 | |
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4
bantering
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| adj.嘲弄的v.开玩笑，说笑，逗乐( banter的现在分词 )；（善意地）取笑，逗弄 | |
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inclination
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| n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好 | |
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6
disarming
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| adj.消除敌意的，使人消气的v.裁军( disarm的现在分词 )；使息怒 | |
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7
prolific
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| adj.丰富的，大量的；多产的，富有创造力的 | |
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pretexts
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| n.借口，托辞( pretext的名词复数 ) | |
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subservience
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| n.有利，有益；从属（地位），附属性；屈从，恭顺；媚态 | |
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adoration
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| n.爱慕，崇拜 | |
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crimson
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| n./adj.深(绯)红色(的)；vi.脸变绯红色 | |
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12
turmoil
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| n.骚乱，混乱，动乱 | |
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misty
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| adj.雾蒙蒙的，有雾的 | |
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poking
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| n. 刺，戳，袋 vt. 拨开，刺，戳 vi. 戳，刺，捅，搜索，伸出，行动散慢 | |
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rusty
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| adj.生锈的；锈色的；荒废了的 | |
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dingy
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| adj.昏暗的，肮脏的 | |
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bust
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| vt.打破；vi.爆裂；n.半身像；胸部 | |
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hood
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| n.头巾，兜帽，覆盖；v.罩上，以头巾覆盖 | |
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scowled
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| 怒视，生气地皱眉( scowl的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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flannel
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| n.法兰绒；法兰绒衣服 | |
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cozy
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| adj.亲如手足的，密切的，暖和舒服的 | |
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inviting
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| adj.诱人的，引人注目的 | |
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belle
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| n.靓女 | |
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justify
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| vt.证明…正当(或有理)，为…辩护 | |
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shrug
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| v.耸肩(表示怀疑、冷漠、不知等) | |
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malicious
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| adj.有恶意的，心怀恶意的 | |
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28
elevation
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| n.高度；海拔；高地；上升；提高 | |
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29
eyebrows
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| 眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
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30
sketches
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| n.草图( sketch的名词复数 )；素描；速写；梗概 | |
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31
bounty
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| n.慷慨的赠予物，奖金；慷慨，大方；施与 | |
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32
interval
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| n.间隔，间距；幕间休息，中场休息 | |
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33
sputtered
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| v.唾沫飞溅( sputter的过去式和过去分词 )；发劈啪声；喷出；飞溅出 | |
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34
penetrated
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| adj. 击穿的，鞭辟入里的 动词penetrate的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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35
effulgence
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| n.光辉 | |
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exultation
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| n.狂喜，得意 | |
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untold
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| adj.数不清的，无数的 | |
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caliber
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| n.能力；水准 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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distinguished
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| adj.卓越的，杰出的，著名的 | |
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41
mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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42
murky
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| adj.黑暗的，朦胧的；adv.阴暗地，混浊地；n.阴暗；昏暗 | |
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43
depressed
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| adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的 | |
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44
bracing
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| adj.令人振奋的 | |
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45
bonbons
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| n.小糖果( bonbon的名词复数 ) | |
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46
scribbled
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| v.潦草的书写( scribble的过去式和过去分词 )；乱画；草草地写；匆匆记下 | |
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