Chapter 27 A Visit to Some Country Snobs

We had the fish, which, as the kind reader may remember, I had brought down in a delicate attention to Mrs. Ponto, to variegate the repast of next day; and cod¹ and oyster-sauce, twice laid, salt cod and scolloped oysters², formed parts of the bill of fare until I began to fancy that the Ponto family, like our late revered³ monarch⁴ George II., had a fancy for stale fish. And about this time, the pig being consumed, we began upon a sheep.

But how shall I forget the solemn splendour of a second course, which was served up in great state by Stripes in a silver dish and cove⁵; a napkin round his dirty thumbs; and consisted of a landrail, not much bigger than a corpulent sparrow.

‘My love, will you take any game?’ says Ponto, with prodigious⁶ gravity; and stuck his fork into that little mouthful of an island in the silver sea. Stripes, too, at intervals⁷, dribbled⁸ out the Marsala with a solemnity which would have done honour to a Duke’s butler. The Bamnecide’s dinner to Shacabac was only one degree removed from these solemn banquets.

As there were plenty of pretty country places close by; a comfortable country town, with good houses of gentlefolks; a beautiful old parsonage, close to the church whither we went (and where the Carabas family have their ancestral carved and monumented Gothic pew), and every appearance of good society in the neighbourhood, I rather wondered we were not enlivened by the appearance of some of the neighbours at the Evergreens⁹, and asked about them.

‘We can’t in our position of life — we can’t well associate with the attorney’s family, as I leave you to suppose,’ says Mrs. Ponto, confidentially¹⁰. ‘Of course not,’ I answered, though I didn’t know why. ‘And the Doctor?’ said I.

‘A most excellent worthy¹¹ creature,’ says Mrs. P. saved Maria’s life — really a learned man; but what can one do in one’s position? One may ask one’s medical man to one’s table certainly: but his family, my dear Mr. Snob¹²!’

‘Half-a-dozen little gallipots,’ interposed Miss Wirt, the governess: ‘he, he, he!’ and the young ladies laughed in chorus.

‘We only live with the county families,’ Miss Wirt (1) continued, tossing up her head. ‘The Duke is abroad: we are at feud¹³ with the Carabases; the Ringwoods don’t come down till Christmas: in fact, nobody’s here till the hunting season — positively¹⁴ nobody.’

‘Whose is the large red house just outside of the town?’

‘What! the CHATEAU-CALICOT? he, he, he! That purse-proud ex-linendraper, Mr. Yardley, with the yellow liveries, and the wife in red velvet¹⁵? How CAN you, my dear Mr. Snob, be so satirical? The impertinence of those people is really something quite overwhelming.’

‘Well, then, there is the parson, Doctor Chrysostom. He’s a gentleman, at any rate.’ At this Mrs. Ponto looked at Miss Wirt. After their eyes had met and they had wagged their heads at each other. They looked up to the ceiling. So did the young ladies. They thrilled. It was evident I had said something terrible. Another black sheep in the Church? thought I with a little sorrow; for I don’t care to own that I have a respect for the cloth. ‘I— hope there’s nothing wrong?

‘Wrong?’ says Mrs. P., clasping her hands with a tragic¹⁶ air.

‘Oh!’ says Miss Wirt, and the two girls, gasping¹⁷ in chorus.

‘Well,’ says I, ‘I’m very sorry for it. I never saw a nicer-looking old gentleman, or a better school, or heard a better sermon.’

‘He used to preach those sermons in a surplice,’ hissed¹⁸ out Mrs. Ponto. ‘He’s a Puseyite, Mr. Snob.’

‘Heavenly powers!’ says I, admiring the pure ardour of these female theologians; and Stripes came in with the tea. It’s so weak that no wonder Ponto’s sleep isn’t disturbed by it.

Of mornings we used to go out shooting. We had Ponto’s own fields to sport over (where we got the landrail), and the non-preserved part of the Hawbuck property: and one evening in a stubble of Ponto’s skirting the Carabas woods, we got among some pheasants, and had some real sport. I shot a hen, I know, greatly to my delight. ‘Bag it,’ says Ponto, in rather a hurried manner: ‘here’s somebody coming.’ So I pocketed the bird.

‘You infernal poaching thieves!’ roars out a man from the hedge in the garb¹⁹ of a gamekeeper. ‘I wish I could catch you on this side of the hedge. I’d put a brace²⁰ of barrels into you, that I would.’

‘Curse that Snapper,’ says Ponto, moving off; ‘he’s always watching me like a spy.’

‘Carry off the birds, you sneaks²¹, and sell ’em in London,’ roars the individual, who it appears was a keeper of Lord Carabas. ‘You’ll get six shillings a brace for ’em.’

‘YOU know the price of ’em well enough, and so does your master too, you scoundrel,’ says Ponto, still retreating.

‘We kill ’em on our ground,’ cries Mr. Snapper. ‘WE don’t set traps for other people’s birds. We’re no decoy ducks. We’re no sneaking²² poachers. We don’t shoot ‘ens, like that ’ere Cockney, who’s got the tail of one a-sticking out of his pocket. Only just come across the hedge, that’s all.’

‘I tell you what,’ says Stripes, who was out with us as keeper this day, (in fact he’s keeper, coachman, gardener, valet, and bailiff, with Tummus under him,) ‘if YOU’LL come across, John Snapper, and take your coat off, I’ll give you such a whopping as you’ve never had since the last time I did it at Guttlebury Fair.’

‘Whop one of your own weight,’ Mr. Snapper said, whistling his dogs and disappearing into the wood. And so we came out of this controversy²³ rather victoriously²⁴; but I began to alter my preconceived ideas of rural felicity.

Notes.

(1) I have since heard that this aristocratic lady’s father was a livery-button maker²⁵ in St. Martin’s Lane: where he met with misfortunes, and his daughter acquired her taste for heraldry. But it may be told to her credit, that out of her earnings²⁶ she has kept the bed-ridden old bankrupt in great comfort and secrecy²⁷ at Pentonville; and furnished her brother’s outfit²⁸ for the Cadetship which her patron, Lord Swigglebiggle, gave her when he was at the Board of Control. I have this information from a friend. To hear Miss Wirt herself, you would fancy that her Papa was a Rothschild, and that the markets of Europe were convulsed when he went into the GAZETTE.

1 cod   

n.鳕鱼；v.愚弄；哄骗

参考例句：

• They salt down cod for winter use.他们腌鳕鱼留着冬天吃。
• Cod are found in the North Atlantic and the North Sea.北大西洋和北海有鳕鱼。

2 oysters   

牡蛎( oyster的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• We don't have oysters tonight, but the crayfish are very good. 我们今晚没有牡蛎供应。但小龙虾是非常好。
• She carried a piping hot grill of oysters and bacon. 她端出一盘滚烫的烤牡蛎和咸肉。

3 revered   

v.崇敬，尊崇，敬畏( revere的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• A number of institutions revered and respected in earlier times have become Aunt Sally for the present generation. 一些早年受到尊崇的惯例，现在已经成了这代人嘲弄的对象了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The Chinese revered corn as a gift from heaven. 中国人将谷物奉为上天的恩赐。 来自辞典例句

4 monarch   

n.帝王，君主，最高统治者

参考例句：

• The monarch's role is purely ceremonial.君主纯粹是个礼仪职位。
• I think myself happier now than the greatest monarch upon earth.我觉得这个时候比世界上什么帝王都快乐。

5 cove   

n.小海湾，小峡谷

参考例句：

• The shore line is wooded,olive-green,a pristine cove.岸边一带林木蓊郁，嫩绿一片，好一个山外的小海湾。
• I saw two children were playing in a cove.我看到两个小孩正在一个小海湾里玩耍。

6 prodigious   

adj.惊人的，奇妙的；异常的；巨大的；庞大的

参考例句：

• This business generates cash in prodigious amounts.这种业务收益丰厚。
• He impressed all who met him with his prodigious memory.他惊人的记忆力让所有见过他的人都印象深刻。

7 intervals   

n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 )；间隔时间；[数学]区间；（戏剧、电影或音乐会的）幕间休息

参考例句：

• The forecast said there would be sunny intervals and showers. 预报间晴，有阵雨。
• Meetings take place at fortnightly intervals. 每两周开一次会。

8 dribbled   

v.流口水( dribble的过去式和过去分词 )；（使液体）滴下或作细流；运球，带球

参考例句：

• Melted wax dribbled down the side of the candle. 熔化了的蜡一滴滴从蜡烛边上流下。
• He dribbled past the fullback and scored a goal. 他越过对方后卫，趁势把球踢入球门。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

9 evergreens   

n.常青树，常绿植物，万年青( evergreen的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The leaves of evergreens are often shaped like needles. 常绿植物的叶常是针形的。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The pine, cedar and spruce are evergreens. 松树、雪松、云杉都是常绿的树。 来自辞典例句

10 confidentially   

ad.秘密地，悄悄地

参考例句：

• She was leaning confidentially across the table. 她神神秘秘地从桌子上靠过来。
• Kao Sung-nien and Wang Ch'u-hou talked confidentially in low tones. 高松年汪处厚两人低声密谈。

11 worthy   

adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的

参考例句：

• I did not esteem him to be worthy of trust.我认为他不值得信赖。
• There occurred nothing that was worthy to be mentioned.没有值得一提的事发生。

12 snob   

n.势利小人，自以为高雅、有学问的人

参考例句：

• Going to a private school had made her a snob.上私立学校后，她变得很势利。
• If you think that way, you are a snob already.如果你那样想的话，你已经是势利小人了。

13 feud   

n.长期不和；世仇；v.长期争斗；世代结仇

参考例句：

• How did he start his feud with his neighbor?他是怎样和邻居开始争吵起来的？
• The two tribes were long at feud with each other.这两个部族长期不和。

14 positively   

adv.明确地，断然，坚决地；实在，确实

参考例句：

• She was positively glowing with happiness.她满脸幸福。
• The weather was positively poisonous.这天气着实讨厌。

15 velvet   

n.丝绒，天鹅绒；adj.丝绒制的，柔软的

参考例句：

• This material feels like velvet.这料子摸起来像丝绒。
• The new settlers wore the finest silk and velvet clothing.新来的移民穿着最华丽的丝绸和天鹅绒衣服。

16 tragic   

adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的

参考例句：

• The effect of the pollution on the beaches is absolutely tragic.污染海滩后果可悲。
• Charles was a man doomed to tragic issues.查理是个注定不得善终的人。

17 gasping   

adj. 气喘的, 痉挛的 动词gasp的现在分词

参考例句：

• He was gasping for breath. 他在喘气。
• "Did you need a drink?""Yes, I'm gasping!” “你要喝点什么吗？”“我巴不得能喝点！”

18 hissed   

发嘶嘶声( hiss的过去式和过去分词 )； 发嘘声表示反对

参考例句：

• Have you ever been hissed at in the middle of a speech? 你在演讲中有没有被嘘过？
• The iron hissed as it pressed the wet cloth. 熨斗压在湿布上时发出了嘶嘶声。

19 garb   

n.服装，装束

参考例句：

• He wore the garb of a general.他身着将军的制服。
• Certain political,social,and legal forms reappear in seemingly different garb.一些政治、社会和法律的形式在表面不同的外衣下重复出现。

20 brace   

n. 支柱,曲柄,大括号; v. 绷紧,顶住,(为困难或坏事)做准备

参考例句：

• My daughter has to wear a brace on her teeth. 我的女儿得戴牙套以矫正牙齿。
• You had better brace yourself for some bad news. 有些坏消息,你最好做好准备。

21 sneaks   

abbr.sneakers (tennis shoes) 胶底运动鞋（网球鞋）v.潜行( sneak的第三人称单数 )；偷偷溜走；（儿童向成人）打小报告；告状

参考例句：

• Typhoid fever sneaks in when sanitation fails. 环境卫生搞不好，伤寒就会乘虚而入。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Honest boys scorn sneaks and liars. 诚实的人看不起狡诈和撒谎的人。 来自辞典例句

22 sneaking   

a.秘密的，不公开的

参考例句：

• She had always had a sneaking affection for him. 以前她一直暗暗倾心于他。
• She ducked the interviewers by sneaking out the back door. 她从后门偷偷溜走，躲开采访者。

23 controversy   

n.争论，辩论，争吵

参考例句：

• That is a fact beyond controversy.那是一个无可争论的事实。
• We ran the risk of becoming the butt of every controversy.我们要冒使自己在所有的纷争中都成为众矢之的的风险。

24 victoriously   

adv.获胜地，胜利地

参考例句：

• Our technical revolution is blazing its way forward through all the difficulties and advancing victoriously. 我们的技术革命正在披荆斩棘，胜利前进。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Ignace victoriously ascended the stairs and knocked on Kessler's door. 伊格内斯踌躇满志地登上楼梯，敲响了凯斯勒的房门。 来自辞典例句

25 maker   

n.制造者，制造商

参考例句：

• He is a trouble maker，You must be distant with him.他是个捣蛋鬼，你不要跟他在一起。
• A cabinet maker must be a master craftsman.家具木工必须是技艺高超的手艺人。

26 earnings   

n.工资收人；利润，利益，所得

参考例句：

• That old man lives on the earnings of his daughter.那个老人靠他女儿的收入维持生活。
• Last year there was a 20% decrease in his earnings.去年他的收入减少了20%。

27 secrecy   

n.秘密，保密，隐蔽

参考例句：

• All the researchers on the project are sworn to secrecy.该项目的所有研究人员都按要求起誓保守秘密。
• Complete secrecy surrounded the meeting.会议在绝对机密的环境中进行。

28 outfit   

n.（为特殊用途的）全套装备，全套服装

参考例句：

• Jenney bought a new outfit for her daughter's wedding.珍妮为参加女儿的婚礼买了一套新装。
• His father bought a ski outfit for him on his birthday.他父亲在他生日那天给他买了一套滑雪用具。