Chapter 37 Club Snobs

As I wish to be particularly agreeable to the ladies (to whom I make my most humble¹ obeisance), we will now, if you please, commence maligning² a class of Snobs³ against whom, I believe, most female minds are embittered⁵ — I mean Club Snobs. I have very seldom heard even the most gentle and placable woman speak without a little feeling of bitterness against those social institutions, those palaces swaggering in St. James’s, which are open to the men; while the ladies have but their dingy⁶ three-windowed brick boxes in Belgravia or in Paddingtonia, or in the region between the road of Edgware and that of Gray’s Inn.

In my grandfather’s time it used to be Freemasonry that roused their anger. It was my grand-aunt (whose portrait we still have in the family) who got into the clock-case at the Royal Rosicrucian Lodge⁷ at Bungay, Suffolk, to spy the proceedings⁸ of the Society, of which her husband was a member, and being frightened by the sudden whirring and striking eleven of the clock (just as the Deputy-Grand-Master was bringing in the mystic gridiron for the reception of a neophyte), rushed out into the midst of the lodge assembled; and was elected, by a desperate unanimity¹⁰, Deputy-Grand-Mistress for life. Though that admirable and courageous¹¹ female never subsequently breathed a word with regard to the secrets of the initiation¹², yet she inspired all our family with such a terror regarding the mysteries of Jachin and Boaz, that none of our family have ever since joined the Society, or worn the dreadful Masonic insignia.

It is known that Orpheus was torn to pieces by some justly indignant Thracian ladies for belonging to an Harmonic Lodge. ‘Let him go back to Eurydice,’ they said, ‘whom he is pretending to regret so.’ But the history is given in Dr. Lempriere’s elegant dictionary in a manner much more forcible than any this feeble pen can attempt. At once, then, and without verbiage¹³, let us take up this subject-matter of Clubs.

Clubs ought not, in my mind, to be permitted to bachelors. If my friend of the Cuttykilts had not our club, the ‘Union Jack¹⁴,’ to go to (I belong to the ‘U.J. and nine other similar institutions), who knows but he never would be a bachelor at this present moment? Instead of being made comfortable, and cockered up with every luxury, as they are at Clubs, bachelors ought to be rendered profoundly miserable¹⁵, in my opinion. Every encouragement should be given to the rendering¹⁷ their spare time disagreeable. There can be no more odious¹⁸ object, according to my sentiments, than young Smith in the pride of health, commanding his dinner of three courses; than middle-aged¹⁹ Jones wallowing (as I may say) in an easy padded arm-chair, over the delicious novel or brilliant magazine; or than old Brown, that selfish old reprobate²⁰ for whom mere²¹ literature has no charms, stretched on the best sofa, sitting on the second edition of THE TIMES, having the MORNING CHRONICLE between his knees, the HERALD²² pushed in between his coat and waistcoat, the STANDARD under his arm, the GLOBE under the other pinion¹⁶, and the DAILY NEWS in perusal²³. ‘I’ll trouble you for PUNCH, Mr. Wiggins’ says the unconscionable old gormandiser, interrupting our friend, who is laughing over the periodical in question.

This kind of selfishness ought not to be. No, no. Young Smith, instead of his dinner and his wine, ought to be, where?— at the festive²⁴ tea-table, to be sure, by the side of Miss Higgs, sipping²⁵ the bohea, or tasting the harmless muffin; while old Mrs. Higgs looks on, pleased at their innocent dalliance, and my friend Miss Wirt, the governess, is performing Thalberg’s last sonata²⁶ in treble X., totally unheeded, at the piano.

Where should the middle-aged Jones be? At his time of life, he ought to be the father of a family. At such an hour — say, at nine o’clock at night — the nursery-bell should have just rung the children to bed. He and Mrs. J. ought to be, by rights, seated on each side of the fire by the dining-room table, a bottle of port-wine between them, not so full as it was an hour since. Mrs. J. has had two glasses; Mrs. Grumble²⁷ (Jones’s mother-inlaw) has had three; Jones himself has finished the rest, and dozes²⁸ comfortably until bed-time.

And Brown, that old newspaper-devouring miscreant²⁹, what right has HE at a club at a decent hour of night? He ought to be playing his rubber with Miss MacWhirter, his wife, and the family apothecary³⁰. His candle ought to be brought to him at ten o’clock, and he should retire to rest just as the young people were thinking of a dance. How much finer, simpler, nobler are the several employments I have sketched³¹ out for these gentlemen than their present nightly orgies at the horrid³² Club.

And, ladies, think of men who do not merely frequent the dining-room and library, but who use other apartments of those horrible dens³³ which it is my purpose to batter³⁴ down; think of Cannon³⁵, the wretch³⁶, with his coat off, at his age and size, clattering³⁷ the balls over the billiard-table all night, and making bets with that odious Captain Spot!— think of Pam in a dark room with Bob Trumper, Jack Deuceace, and Charley Vole, playing, the poor dear misguided wretch, guinea points and five pounds on the rubber!— above all, think — oh, think of that den⁹ of abomination, which, I am told, has been established in SOME clubs, called THE SMOKING-ROOM,— think of the debauchees who congregate³⁸ there, the quantities of reeking³⁹ whisky-punch or more dangerous sherry-cobbler which they consume;— think of them coming home at cock-crow and letting themselves into the quiet house with the Chubb key;— think of them, the hypocrites, taking off their insidious⁴⁰ boots before they slink upstairs, the children sleeping overhead, the wife of their bosom⁴¹ alone with the waning⁴² rushlight in the two-pair front — that chamber⁴³ so soon to be rendered hateful by the smell of their stale cigars: I am not an advocate of violence; I am not, by nature, of an incendiary turn of mind: but if, my dear ladies, you are for assassinating⁴⁴ Mr. Chubb and burning down Club-houses in St. James’s, there is ONE Snob⁴ at who will not think the worse of you.

The only men who, as I opine, ought to be allowed the use of Clubs, are married men without a profession. The continual presence of these in a house cannot be thought, even by the most loving of wives, desirable. Say the girls are beginning to practise their music, which in an honourable⁴⁵ English family, ought to occupy every young gentlewoman three hours; it would be rather hard to call upon poor papa to sit in the drawing-room all that time, and listen to the interminable discords⁴⁶ and shrieks⁴⁷ which are elicited⁴⁸ from the miserable piano during the above necessary operation. A man with a good ear, especially, would go mad, if compelled daily to submit to this horror.

Or suppose you have a fancy to go to the milliner’s, or to Howell and James’s, it is manifest, my dear Madam, that your husband is much better at the Club during these operations than by your side in the carriage, or perched in wonder upon one of the stools at Shawl and Gimcrack’s, whilst young counter-dandies are displaying their wares⁴⁹.

This sort of husbands should be sent out after breakfast, and if not Members of Parliament, or Directors of a Railroad, or an Insurance Company, should be put into their clubs, and told to remain there until dinner-time. No sight is more agreeable to my truly regulated mind than to see the noble characters so worthily⁵⁰ employed. Whenever I pass by St. James’s Street, having the privilege, like the rest of the world, of looking in at the windows of ‘Blight’s,’ or ‘Foodle’s,’ or ‘Snook’s,’ or the great bay at the ‘Contemplative Club,’ I behold⁵¹ with respectful appreciation⁵² the figures within — the honest rosy⁵³ old fogies, the mouldy old dandies, the waist-belts and glossy⁵⁴ wigs⁵⁵ and tight cravats⁵⁶ of those most vacuous⁵⁷ and respectable men. Such men are best there during the day-time surely. When you part with them, dear ladies, think of the rapture⁵⁸ consequent on their return. You have transacted⁵⁹ your household affairs; you have made your purchases; you have paid your visits; you have aired your poodle in the Park; your French maid has completed the toilette which renders you so ravishingly beautiful by candlelight, and you are fit to make home pleasant to him who has been absent all day.

Such men surely ought to have their Clubs, and we will not class them among Club Snobs therefore:— on whom let us reserve our attack for the next chapter.

1 humble   

adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低

参考例句：

• In my humble opinion,he will win the election.依我拙见，他将在选举中获胜。
• Defeat and failure make people humble.挫折与失败会使人谦卑。

2 maligning   

vt.污蔑，诽谤（malign的现在分词形式）

参考例句：

• She was criticized for maligning innocent people. 她由于中伤好人而受到批评。 来自互联网

3 snobs   

（谄上傲下的）势利小人( snob的名词复数 )； 自高自大者，自命不凡者

参考例句：

• She dislikes snobs intensely. 她极其厌恶势利小人。
• Most of the people who worshipped her, who read every tidbit about her in the gossip press and hung up pictures of her in their rooms, were not social snobs. 崇敬她大多数的人不会放过每一篇报导她的八卦新闻，甚至在他们的房间中悬挂黛妃的画像，这些人并非都是傲慢成性。

4 snob   

n.势利小人，自以为高雅、有学问的人

参考例句：

• Going to a private school had made her a snob.上私立学校后，她变得很势利。
• If you think that way, you are a snob already.如果你那样想的话，你已经是势利小人了。

5 embittered   

v.使怨恨，激怒( embitter的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• These injustices embittered her even more. 不公平使她更加受苦。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The artist was embittered by public neglect. 大众的忽视于那位艺术家更加难受。 来自《简明英汉词典》

6 dingy   

adj.昏暗的，肮脏的

参考例句：

• It was a street of dingy houses huddled together. 这是一条挤满了破旧房子的街巷。
• The dingy cottage was converted into a neat tasteful residence.那间脏黑的小屋已变成一个整洁雅致的住宅。

7 lodge   

v.临时住宿，寄宿，寄存，容纳；n.传达室，小旅馆

参考例句：

• Is there anywhere that I can lodge in the village tonight?村里有我今晚过夜的地方吗？
• I shall lodge at the inn for two nights.我要在这家小店住两个晚上。

8 proceedings   

n.进程，过程，议程；诉讼(程序)；公报

参考例句：

• He was released on bail pending committal proceedings. 他交保获释正在候审。
• to initiate legal proceedings against sb 对某人提起诉讼

9 den   

n.兽穴；秘密地方；安静的小房间，私室

参考例句：

• There is a big fox den on the back hill.后山有一个很大的狐狸窝。
• The only way to catch tiger cubs is to go into tiger's den.不入虎穴焉得虎子。

10 unanimity   

n.全体一致，一致同意

参考例句：

• These discussions have led to a remarkable unanimity.这些讨论导致引人注目的一致意见。
• There is no unanimity of opinion as to the best one.没有一个公认的最好意见。

11 courageous   

adj.勇敢的，有胆量的

参考例句：

• We all honour courageous people.我们都尊重勇敢的人。
• He was roused to action by courageous words.豪言壮语促使他奋起行动。

12 initiation   

n.开始

参考例句：

• her initiation into the world of marketing 她的初次涉足营销界
• It was my initiation into the world of high fashion. 这是我初次涉足高级时装界。

13 verbiage   

n.冗词；冗长

参考例句：

• Stripped of their pretentious verbiage,his statements come dangerously close to inviting racial hatred.抛开那些夸大其词的冗词赘语不论，他的言论有挑起种族仇恨的危险。
• Even in little 140-character bites,that's a lot of verbiage.即使限制在一条140个字也有很大一部分是废话。

14 jack   

n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克

参考例句：

• I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
• He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。

15 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

16 pinion   

v.束缚；n.小齿轮

参考例句：

• At nine the next morning Bentley was pinioned,hooded and hanged.次日上午9点，本特里被捆住双臂，戴上头罩，然后绞死了。
• Why don't you try tightening the pinion nut first?你为什么不先扭紧小齿轮的螺帽？

17 rendering   

n.表现，描写

参考例句：

• She gave a splendid rendering of Beethoven's piano sonata.她精彩地演奏了贝多芬的钢琴奏鸣曲。
• His narrative is a super rendering of dialect speech and idiom.他的叙述是方言和土语最成功的运用。

18 odious   

adj.可憎的，讨厌的

参考例句：

• The judge described the crime as odious.法官称这一罪行令人发指。
• His character could best be described as odious.他的人格用可憎来形容最贴切。

19 middle-aged   

adj.中年的

参考例句：

• I noticed two middle-aged passengers.我注意到两个中年乘客。
• The new skin balm was welcome by middle-aged women.这种新护肤香膏受到了中年妇女的欢迎。

20 reprobate   

n.无赖汉；堕落的人

参考例句：

• After the fall,god begins to do the work of differentiation between his elect and the reprobate.人堕落之后，上帝开始分辨选民与被遗弃的人。
• He disowned his reprobate son.他声明与堕落的儿子脱离关系。

21 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

22 herald   

vt.预示...的来临，预告，宣布，欢迎

参考例句：

• In England, the cuckoo is the herald of spring.在英国杜鹃鸟是报春的使者。
• Dawn is the herald of day.曙光是白昼的先驱。

23 perusal   

n.细读，熟读；目测

参考例句：

• Peter Cooke undertook to send each of us a sample contract for perusal.彼得·库克答应给我们每人寄送一份合同样本供阅读。
• A perusal of the letters which we have published has satisfied him of the reality of our claim.读了我们的公开信后，他终于相信我们的要求的确是真的。

24 festive   

adj.欢宴的，节日的

参考例句：

• It was Christmas and everyone was in festive mood.当时是圣诞节，每个人都沉浸在节日的欢乐中。
• We all wore festive costumes to the ball.我们都穿着节日的盛装前去参加舞会。

25 sipping   

v.小口喝，呷，抿( sip的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• She sat in the sun, idly sipping a cool drink. 她坐在阳光下懒洋洋地抿着冷饮。
• She sat there, sipping at her tea. 她坐在那儿抿着茶。

26 sonata   

n.奏鸣曲

参考例句：

• He played a piano sonata of his own composition.他弹奏了一首自作的钢琴奏鸣曲。
• The young boy played the violin sonata masterfully.那个小男孩的小提琴奏鸣曲拉得很熟练。

27 grumble   

vi.抱怨；咕哝；n.抱怨，牢骚；咕哝，隆隆声

参考例句：

• I don't want to hear another grumble from you.我不愿再听到你的抱怨。
• He could do nothing but grumble over the situation.他除了埋怨局势之外别无他法。

28 dozes   

n.打盹儿，打瞌睡( doze的名词复数 )v.打盹儿，打瞌睡( doze的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• It'scratches, licks or dozes off. 有搔痒、舐毛、打瞌睡等动作。 来自互联网

29 miscreant   

n.恶棍

参考例句：

• Local people demanded that the District Magistrate apprehend the miscreants.当地人要求地方法官逮捕那些歹徒。
• The days of a judge telling a miscreant to join the army or go to jail are over.由法官判一名无赖不去当兵就得坐牢的日子过去了。

30 apothecary   

n.药剂师

参考例句：

• I am an apothecary of that hospital.我是那家医院的一名药剂师。
• He was the usual cut and dry apothecary,of no particular age and color.他是那种再普通不过的行医者，说不出多大年纪，相貌也没什么值得一提的。

31 sketched   

v.草拟（sketch的过去式与过去分词形式）

参考例句：

• The historical article sketched the major events of the decade. 这篇有关历史的文章概述了这十年中的重大事件。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He sketched the situation in a few vivid words. 他用几句生动的语言简述了局势。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

32 horrid   

adj.可怕的；令人惊恐的；恐怖的；极讨厌的

参考例句：

• I'm not going to the horrid dinner party.我不打算去参加这次讨厌的宴会。
• The medicine is horrid and she couldn't get it down.这种药很难吃，她咽不下去。

33 dens   

n.牙齿，齿状部分；兽窝( den的名词复数 )；窝点；休息室；书斋

参考例句：

• Female bears tend to line their dens with leaves or grass. 母熊往往会在洞穴里垫些树叶或草。 来自辞典例句
• In winter bears usually hibernate in their dens. 冬天熊通常在穴里冬眠。 来自辞典例句

34 batter   

v.接连重击；磨损；n.牛奶面糊；击球员

参考例句：

• The batter skied to the center fielder.击球手打出一个高飞球到中外野手。
• Put a small quantity of sugar into the batter.在面糊里放少量的糖。

35 cannon   

n.大炮，火炮；飞机上的机关炮

参考例句：

• The soldiers fired the cannon.士兵们开炮。
• The cannon thundered in the hills.大炮在山间轰鸣。

36 wretch   

n.可怜的人，不幸的人；卑鄙的人

参考例句：

• You are really an ungrateful wretch to complain instead of thanking him.你不但不谢他，还埋怨他，真不知好歹。
• The dead husband is not the dishonoured wretch they fancied him.死去的丈夫不是他们所想象的不光彩的坏蛋。

37 clattering   

发出咔哒声（clatter的现在分词形式）

参考例句：

• Typewriters keep clattering away. 打字机在不停地嗒嗒作响。
• The typewriter was clattering away. 打字机啪嗒啪嗒地响着。

38 congregate   

v.(使)集合，聚集

参考例句：

• Now they can offer a digital place for their readers to congregate and talk.现在他们可以为读者提供一个数字化空间，让读者可以聚集和交谈。
• This is a place where swans congregate.这是个天鹅聚集地。

39 reeking   

v.发出浓烈的臭气( reek的现在分词 )；散发臭气；发出难闻的气味 (of sth)；明显带有（令人不快或生疑的跡象）

参考例句：

• I won't have you reeking with sweat in my bed! 我就不许你混身臭汗，臭烘烘的上我的炕！ 来自汉英文学 - 骆驼祥子
• This is a novel reeking with sentimentalism. 这是一本充满着感伤主义的小说。 来自辞典例句

40 insidious   

adj.阴险的，隐匿的，暗中为害的，（疾病）不知不觉之间加剧

参考例句：

• That insidious man bad-mouthed me to almost everyone else.那个阴险的家伙几乎见人便说我的坏话。
• Organized crime has an insidious influence on all who come into contact with it.所有和集团犯罪有关的人都会不知不觉地受坏影响。

41 bosom   

n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的

参考例句：

• She drew a little book from her bosom.她从怀里取出一本小册子。
• A dark jealousy stirred in his bosom.他内心生出一阵恶毒的嫉妒。

42 waning   

adj.（月亮）渐亏的，逐渐减弱或变小的n.月亏v.衰落( wane的现在分词 )；（月）亏；变小；变暗淡

参考例句：

• Her enthusiasm for the whole idea was waning rapidly. 她对整个想法的热情迅速冷淡了下来。
• The day is waning and the road is ending. 日暮途穷。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

43 chamber   

n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所

参考例句：

• For many,the dentist's surgery remains a torture chamber.对许多人来说，牙医的治疗室一直是间受刑室。
• The chamber was ablaze with light.会议厅里灯火辉煌。

44 assassinating   

v.暗杀( assassinate的现在分词 )；中伤；诋毁；破坏

参考例句：

• They struck a blow for freedom by assassinating the colonial governor. 他们为了自由而奋力一博，暗杀了那位殖民地总督。 来自互联网

45 honourable   

adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的

参考例句：

• I don't think I am worthy of such an honourable title.这样的光荣称号，我可担当不起。
• I hope to find an honourable way of settling difficulties.我希望设法找到一个体面的办法以摆脱困境。

46 discords   

不和（discord的复数形式）

参考例句：

• There are many discords in this family. 在这个家庭里有许多争吵。
• The speaker's opinion discords with the principles of this society. 演讲者的意见与本会的原则不符。

47 shrieks   

n.尖叫声( shriek的名词复数 )v.尖叫( shriek的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• shrieks of fiendish laughter 恶魔般的尖笑声
• For years, from newspapers, broadcasts, the stages and at meetings, we had heard nothing but grandiloquent rhetoric delivered with shouts and shrieks that deafened the ears. 多少年来， 报纸上， 广播里， 舞台上， 会场上的声嘶力竭，装腔做态的高调搞得我们震耳欲聋。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

48 elicited   

引出，探出( elicit的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• Threats to reinstate the tax elicited jeer from the Opposition. 恢复此项征税的威胁引起了反对党的嘲笑。
• The comedian's joke elicited applause and laughter from the audience. 那位滑稽演员的笑话博得观众的掌声和笑声。

49 wares   

n. 货物, 商品

参考例句：

• They sold their wares at half-price. 他们的货品是半价出售的。
• The peddler was crying up his wares. 小贩极力夸耀自己的货物。

50 worthily   

重要地，可敬地，正当地

参考例句：

• Many daughters have done worthily, But you surpass them all. 29行事有才德的女子很多，惟独你超过众人。
• Then as my gift, which your true love has worthily purchased, take mydaughter. 那么，就作为我的礼物，把我的女儿接受下来吧--这也是你的真实爱情应得的报偿。

51 behold   

v.看，注视，看到

参考例句：

• The industry of these little ants is wonderful to behold.这些小蚂蚁辛勤劳动的样子看上去真令人惊叹。
• The sunrise at the seaside was quite a sight to behold.海滨日出真是个奇景。

52 appreciation   

n.评价；欣赏；感谢；领会，理解；价格上涨

参考例句：

• I would like to express my appreciation and thanks to you all.我想对你们所有人表达我的感激和谢意。
• I'll be sending them a donation in appreciation of their help.我将送给他们一笔捐款以感谢他们的帮助。

53 rosy   

adj.美好的，乐观的，玫瑰色的

参考例句：

• She got a new job and her life looks rosy.她找到一份新工作，生活看上去很美好。
• She always takes a rosy view of life.她总是对生活持乐观态度。

54 glossy   

adj.平滑的；有光泽的

参考例句：

• I like these glossy spots.我喜欢这些闪闪发光的花点。
• She had glossy black hair.她长着乌黑发亮的头发。

55 wigs   

n.假发，法官帽( wig的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• They say that wigs will be coming in again this year. 据说今年又要流行戴假发了。 来自辞典例句
• Frank, we needed more wigs than we thought, and we have to do some advertising. 弗兰克，因为我们需要更多的假发，而且我们还要做点广告。 来自电影对白

56 cravats   

n.（系在衬衫衣领里面的）男式围巾( cravat的名词复数 )

参考例句：

57 vacuous   

adj.空的，漫散的，无聊的，愚蠢的

参考例句：

• Male models are not always so vacuous as they are made out to be.男模特儿并不总像人们说的那样愚蠢。
• His eyes looked dull,almost vacuous.他看上去目光呆滞，茫然若失。

58 rapture   

n.狂喜；全神贯注；着迷；v.使狂喜

参考例句：

• His speech was received with rapture by his supporters.他的演说受到支持者们的热烈欢迎。
• In the midst of his rapture,he was interrupted by his father.他正欢天喜地，被他父亲打断了。

59 transacted   

v.办理（业务等）( transact的过去式和过去分词 )；交易，谈判

参考例句：

• We transacted business with the firm. 我们和这家公司交易。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Major Pendennis transacted his benevolence by deputy and by post. 潘登尼斯少校依靠代理人和邮局，实施着他的仁爱之心。 来自辞典例句