Part 4 Chapter 11

Why monks¹ love to be in kitchens.

This, said Epistemon, is spoke³ like a true monk²; I mean like a right monking monk, not a bemonked monastical monkling. Truly you put me in mind of some passages that happened at Florence, some twenty years ago, in a company of studious travellers, fond of visiting the learned, and seeing the antiquities⁴ of Italy, among whom I was. As we viewed the situation and beauty of Florence, the structure of the dome⁵, the magnificence of the churches and palaces, we strove to outdo one another in giving them their due; when a certain monk of Amiens, Bernard Lardon by name, quite angry, scandalized, and out of all patience, told us, I don’t know what the devil you can find in this same town, that is so much cried up; for my part I have looked and pored and stared as well as the best of you; I think my eyesight is as clear as another body’s, and what can one see after all? There are fine houses, indeed and that’s all. But the cage does not feed the birds. God and Monsieur St. Bernard, our good patron, be with us! in all this same town I have not seen one poor lane of roasting cooks; and yet I have not a little looked about and sought for so necessary a part of a commonwealth⁶: ay, and I dare assure you that I have pried⁷ up and down with the exactness of an informer; as ready to number, both to the right and left, how many, and on what side, we might find most roasting cooks, as a spy would be to reckon the bastions of a town. Now at Amiens, in four, nay⁸, five times less ground than we have trod in our contemplations, I could have shown you above fourteen streets of roasting cooks, most ancient, savoury, and aromatic⁹. I cannot imagine what kind of pleasure you can have taken in gazing on the lions and Africans (so methinks you call their tigers) near the belfry, or in ogling¹⁰ the porcupines¹¹ and estridges in the Lord Philip Strozzi’s palace. Faith and truth I had rather see a good fat goose at the spit. This porphyry, those marbles are fine; I say nothing to the contrary; but our cheesecakes at Amiens are far better in my mind. These ancient statues are well made; I am willing to believe it; but, by St. Ferreol of Abbeville, we have young wenches in our country which please me better a thousand times.

What is the reason, asked Friar John, that monks are always to be found in kitchens, and kings, emperors, and popes are never there? Is there not, said Rhizotome, some latent virtue¹² and specific propriety¹³ hid in the kettles and pans, which, as the loadstone attracts iron, draws the monks there, and cannot attract emperors, popes, or kings? Or is it a natural induction¹⁴ and inclination¹⁵, fixed¹⁶ in the frocks and cowls, which of itself leads and forceth those good religious men into kitchens, whether they will or no? He would speak of forms following matter, as Averroes calls them, answered Epistemon. Right, said Friar John.

I will not offer to solve this problem, said Pantagruel; for it is somewhat ticklish¹⁷, and you can hardly handle it without coming off scurvily¹⁸; but I will tell you what I have heard.

Antigonus, King of Macedon, one day coming into one of the tents, where his cooks used to dress his meat, and finding there poet Antagoras frying a conger, and holding the pan himself, merrily asked him, Pray, Mr. Poet, was Homer frying congers when he wrote the deeds of Agamemnon? Antagoras readily answered: But do you think, sir, that when Agamemnon did them he made it his business to know if any in his camp were frying congers? The king thought it an indecency that a poet should be thus a-frying in a kitchen; and the poet let the king know that it was a more indecent thing for a king to be found in such a place. I’ll clap another story upon the neck of this, quoth Panurge, and will tell you what Breton Villandry answered one day to the Duke of Guise¹⁹.

They were saying that at a certain battle of King Francis against Charles the Fifth, Breton, armed cap-a-pie to the teeth, and mounted like St. George, yet sneaked²⁰ off, and played least in sight during the engagement. Blood and oons, answered Breton, I was there, and can prove it easily; nay, even where you, my lord, dared not have been. The duke began to resent this as too rash and saucy²¹; but Breton easily appeased²² him, and set them all a-laughing. Egad, my lord, quoth he, I kept out of harm’s way; I was all the while with your page Jack²³, skulking²⁴ in a certain place where you had not dared hide your head as I did. Thus discoursing²⁵, they got to their ships, and left the island of Chely.

1 monks   

n.修道士，僧侣( monk的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• The monks lived a very ascetic life. 僧侣过着很清苦的生活。
• He had been trained rigorously by the monks. 他接受过修道士的严格训练。 来自《简明英汉词典》

2 monk   

n.和尚，僧侣，修道士

参考例句：

• The man was a monk from Emei Mountain.那人是峨眉山下来的和尚。
• Buddhist monk sat with folded palms.和尚合掌打坐。

3 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

4 antiquities   

n.古老( antiquity的名词复数 )；古迹；古人们；古代的风俗习惯

参考例句：

• There is rest and healing in the contemplation of antiquities. 欣赏古物有休息和疗养之功。 来自辞典例句
• Bertha developed a fine enthusiasm for the antiquities of London. 伯沙对伦敦的古迹产生了很大的热情。 来自辞典例句

5 dome   

n.圆屋顶，拱顶

参考例句：

• The dome was supported by white marble columns.圆顶由白色大理石柱支撑着。
• They formed the dome with the tree's branches.他们用树枝搭成圆屋顶。

6 commonwealth   

n.共和国，联邦，共同体

参考例句：

• He is the chairman of the commonwealth of artists.他是艺术家协会的主席。
• Most of the members of the Commonwealth are nonwhite.英联邦的许多成员国不是白人国家。

7 pried   

v.打听，刺探（他人的私事）( pry的过去式和过去分词 )；撬开

参考例句：

• We pried open the locked door with an iron bar. 我们用铁棍把锁着的门撬开。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• So Tom pried his mouth open and poured down the Pain-killer. 因此汤姆撬开它的嘴，把止痛药灌下去。 来自英汉文学 - 汤姆历险

8 nay   

adv.不；n.反对票，投反对票者

参考例句：

• He was grateful for and proud of his son's remarkable,nay,unique performance.他为儿子出色的，不，应该是独一无二的表演心怀感激和骄傲。
• Long essays,nay,whole books have been written on this.许多长篇大论的文章，不，应该说是整部整部的书都是关于这件事的。

9 aromatic   

adj.芳香的，有香味的

参考例句：

• It has an agreeable aromatic smell.它有一种好闻的香味。
• It is light,fruity aromatic and a perfect choice for ending a meal.它是口感轻淡，圆润，芳香的，用于结束一顿饭完美的选择。

10 ogling   

v.（向…）抛媚眼，送秋波( ogle的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• He was not in the habit of ogling women. 他没有盯着女人看个没完的习惯。
• Uncle Geooge got a black eye for ogling a lady in the pub. 乔治叔叔在酒店里对一女士抛媚眼而被打黑了一只眼睛。

11 porcupines   

n.豪猪，箭猪( porcupine的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Porcupines use their spines to protect themselves. 豪猪用身上的刺毛来自卫。
• The59 victims so far include an elephant, dromedaries, monkeys and porcupines. 目前为止，死亡的动物包括大象、峰骆驼、子以及豪猪。 来自互联网

12 virtue   

n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力

参考例句：

• He was considered to be a paragon of virtue.他被认为是品德尽善尽美的典范。
• You need to decorate your mind with virtue.你应该用德行美化心灵。

13 propriety   

n.正当行为；正当；适当

参考例句：

• We hesitated at the propriety of the method.我们对这种办法是否适用拿不定主意。
• The sensitive matter was handled with great propriety.这件机密的事处理得极为适当。

14 induction   

n.感应，感应现象

参考例句：

• His induction as a teacher was a turning point in his life.他就任教师工作是他一生的转折点。
• The magnetic signals are sensed by induction coils.磁信号由感应线圈所检测。

15 inclination   

n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好

参考例句：

• She greeted us with a slight inclination of the head.她微微点头向我们致意。
• I did not feel the slightest inclination to hurry.我没有丝毫着急的意思。

16 fixed   

adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的

参考例句：

• Have you two fixed on a date for the wedding yet?你们俩选定婚期了吗？
• Once the aim is fixed,we should not change it arbitrarily.目标一旦确定，我们就不应该随意改变。

17 ticklish   

adj.怕痒的；问题棘手的；adv.怕痒地；n.怕痒，小心处理

参考例句：

• This massage method is not recommended for anyone who is very ticklish.这种按摩法不推荐给怕痒的人使用。
• The news is quite ticklish to the ear,这消息听起来使人觉得有些难办。

18 scurvily   

下流地，粗鄙地，无礼地

参考例句：

19 guise   

n.外表，伪装的姿态

参考例句：

• They got into the school in the guise of inspectors.他们假装成视察员进了学校。
• The thief came into the house under the guise of a repairman.那小偷扮成个修理匠进了屋子。

20 sneaked   

v.潜行( sneak的过去式和过去分词 )；偷偷溜走；（儿童向成人）打小报告；告状

参考例句：

• I sneaked up the stairs. 我蹑手蹑脚地上了楼。
• She sneaked a surreptitious glance at her watch. 她偷偷看了一眼手表。

21 saucy   

adj.无礼的；俊俏的；活泼的

参考例句：

• He was saucy and mischievous when he was working.他工作时总爱调皮捣蛋。
• It was saucy of you to contradict your father.你顶撞父亲，真是无礼。

22 appeased   

安抚，抚慰( appease的过去式和过去分词 )； 绥靖（满足另一国的要求以避免战争）

参考例句：

• His hunger could only be appeased by his wife. 他的欲望只有他的妻子能满足。
• They are the more readily appeased. 他们比较容易和解。

23 jack   

n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克

参考例句：

• I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
• He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。

24 skulking   

v.潜伏，偷偷摸摸地走动，鬼鬼祟祟地活动( skulk的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• There was someone skulking behind the bushes. 有人藏在灌木后面。
• There were half a dozen foxes skulking in the undergrowth. 在林下灌丛中潜伏着五六只狐狸。 来自辞典例句

25 discoursing   

演说（discourse的现在分词形式）

参考例句：

• He was discoursing to us on Keats. 他正给我们讲济慈。
• He found the time better employed in searching than in discussing, in discovering than in discoursing. 他认为与其把时间花费在你争我辩和高谈阔论上，不如用在研究和发现上。