How in the land of Satin we saw Hearsay1, who kept a school of vouching2.
We went a little higher up into the country of Tapestry3, and saw the Mediterranean4 Sea open to the right and left down to the very bottom; just as the Red Sea very fairly left its bed at the Arabian Gulf5 to make a lane for the Jews when they left Egypt.
There I found Triton winding6 his silver shell instead of a horn, and also Glaucus, Proteus, Nereus, and a thousand other godlings and sea monsters.
I also saw an infinite number of fish of all kinds, dancing, flying, vaulting7, fighting, eating, breathing, billing, shoving, milting, spawning8, hunting, fishing, skirmishing, lying in ambuscado, making truces9, cheapening, bargaining, swearing, and sporting.
In a blind corner we saw Aristotle holding a lantern in the posture10 in which the hermit11 uses to be drawn12 near St. Christopher, watching, prying13, thinking, and setting everything down.
Behind him stood a pack of other philosophers, like so many bums14 by a head-bailiff, as Appian, Heliodorus, Athenaeus, Porphyrius, Pancrates, Arcadian, Numenius, Possidonius, Ovidius, Oppianus, Olympius, Seleucus, Leonides, Agathocles, Theophrastus, Damostratus, Mutianus, Nymphodorus, Aelian, and five hundred other such plodding15 dons, who were full of business, yet had little to do; like Chrysippus or Aristarchus of Soli, who for eight-and-fifty years together did nothing in the world but examine the state and concerns of bees.
I spied Peter Gilles among these, with a urinal in his hand, narrowly watching the water of those goodly fishes.
When we had long beheld16 everything in this land of Satin, Pantagruel said, I have sufficiently17 fed my eyes, but my belly18 is empty all this while, and chimes to let me know ’tis time to go to dinner. Let’s take care of the body lest the soul abdicate19 it; and to this effect let’s taste some of these anacampserotes [’An herb, the touching20 of which is said to reconcile lovers.’— Motteux.] that hang over our heads. Psha, cried one, they are mere21 trash, stark22 naught23, o’ my word; they’re good for nothing.
I then went to pluck some mirobolans off of a piece of tapestry whereon they hung, but the devil a bit I could chew or swallow ‘em; and had you had them betwixt your teeth you would have sworn they had been thrown silk; there was no manner of savour in ‘em.
One might be apt to think Heliogabalus had taken a hint from thence, to feast those whom he had caused to fast a long time, promising24 them a sumptuous25, plentiful26, and imperial feast after it; for all the treat used to amount to no more than several sorts of meat in wax, marble, earthenware27, painted and figured tablecloths28.
While we were looking up and down to find some more substantial food, we heard a loud various noise, like that of paper-mills (or women bucking29 of linen); so with all speed we went to the place whence the noise came, where we found a diminutive30, monstrous31, misshapen old fellow, called Hearsay. His mouth was slit32 up to his ears, and in it were seven tongues, each of them cleft33 into seven parts. However, he chattered34, tattled, and prated35 with all the seven at once, of different matters, and in divers36 languages.
He had as many ears all over his head and the rest of his body as Argus formerly37 had eyes, and was as blind as a beetle38, and had the palsy in his legs.
About him stood an innumerable number of men and women, gaping39, listening, and hearing very intensely. Among ‘em I observed some who strutted40 like crows in a gutter41, and principally a very handsome bodied man in the face, who held then a map of the world, and with little aphorisms42 compendiously43 explained everything to ‘em; so that those men of happy memories grew learned in a trice, and would most fluently talk with you of a world of prodigious44 things, the hundredth part of which would take up a man’s whole life to be fully45 known.
Among the rest they descanted with great prolixity46 on the pyramids and hieroglyphics47 of Egypt, of the Nile, of Babylon, of the Troglodytes48, the Hymantopodes, or crump-footed nation, the Blemiae, people that wear their heads in the middle of their breasts, the Pigmies, the Cannibals, the Hyperborei and their mountains, the Egypanes with their goat’s feet, and the devil and all of others; every individual word of it by hearsay.
I am much mistaken if I did not see among them Herodotus, Pliny, Solinus, Berosus, Philostratus, Pomponius Mela, Strabo, and God knows how many other antiquaries.
Then Albert, the great Jacobin friar, Peter Tesmoin, alias49 Witness, Pope Pius the Second, Volaterranus, Paulus Jovius the valiant50, Jemmy Cartier, Chaton the Armenian, Marco Polo the Venetian, Ludovico Romano, Pedro Aliares, and forty cartloads of other modern historians, lurking51 behind a piece of tapestry, where they were at it ding-dong, privately52 scribbling53 the Lord knows what, and making rare work of it; and all by hearsay.
Behind another piece of tapestry (on which Naboth and Susanna’s accusers were fairly represented), I saw close by Hearsay, good store of men of the country of Perce and Maine, notable students, and young enough.
I asked what sort of study they applied54 themselves to; and was told that from their youth they learned to be evidences, affidavit-men, and vouchers55, and were instructed in the art of swearing; in which they soon became such proficients56, that when they left that country, and went back into their own, they set up for themselves and very honestly lived by their trade of evidencing, positively57 giving their testimony58 of all things whatsoever59 to those who feed them most roundly to do a job of journey-work for them; and all this by hearsay.
You may think what you will of it; but I can assure you they gave some of us corners of their cakes, and we merrily helped to empty their hogsheads. Then, in a friendly manner, they advised us to be as sparing of truth as possibly we could if ever we had a mind to get court preferment.
1 hearsay | |
n.谣传,风闻 | |
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2 vouching | |
n.(复核付款凭单等)核单v.保证( vouch的现在分词 );担保;确定;确定地说 | |
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3 tapestry | |
n.挂毯,丰富多采的画面 | |
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4 Mediterranean | |
adj.地中海的;地中海沿岸的 | |
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5 gulf | |
n.海湾;深渊,鸿沟;分歧,隔阂 | |
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6 winding | |
n.绕,缠,绕组,线圈 | |
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7 vaulting | |
n.(天花板或屋顶的)拱形结构 | |
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8 spawning | |
产卵 | |
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9 truces | |
休战( truce的名词复数 ); 停战(协定); 停止争辩(的协议); 中止 | |
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10 posture | |
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势 | |
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11 hermit | |
n.隐士,修道者;隐居 | |
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12 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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13 prying | |
adj.爱打听的v.打听,刺探(他人的私事)( pry的现在分词 );撬开 | |
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14 bums | |
n. 游荡者,流浪汉,懒鬼,闹饮,屁股 adj. 没有价值的,不灵光的,不合理的 vt. 令人失望,乞讨 vi. 混日子,以乞讨为生 | |
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15 plodding | |
a.proceeding in a slow or dull way | |
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16 beheld | |
v.看,注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 );瞧;看呀;(叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现)哎哟 | |
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17 sufficiently | |
adv.足够地,充分地 | |
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18 belly | |
n.肚子,腹部;(像肚子一样)鼓起的部分,膛 | |
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19 abdicate | |
v.让位,辞职,放弃 | |
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20 touching | |
adj.动人的,使人感伤的 | |
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21 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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22 stark | |
adj.荒凉的;严酷的;完全的;adv.完全地 | |
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23 naught | |
n.无,零 [=nought] | |
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24 promising | |
adj.有希望的,有前途的 | |
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25 sumptuous | |
adj.豪华的,奢侈的,华丽的 | |
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26 plentiful | |
adj.富裕的,丰富的 | |
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27 earthenware | |
n.土器,陶器 | |
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28 tablecloths | |
n.桌布,台布( tablecloth的名词复数 ) | |
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29 bucking | |
v.(马等)猛然弓背跃起( buck的现在分词 );抵制;猛然震荡;马等尥起后蹄跳跃 | |
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30 diminutive | |
adj.小巧可爱的,小的 | |
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31 monstrous | |
adj.巨大的;恐怖的;可耻的,丢脸的 | |
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32 slit | |
n.狭长的切口;裂缝;vt.切开,撕裂 | |
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33 cleft | |
n.裂缝;adj.裂开的 | |
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34 chattered | |
(人)喋喋不休( chatter的过去式 ); 唠叨; (牙齿)打战; (机器)震颤 | |
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35 prated | |
v.(古时用语)唠叨,啰唆( prate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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36 divers | |
adj.不同的;种种的 | |
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37 formerly | |
adv.从前,以前 | |
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38 beetle | |
n.甲虫,近视眼的人 | |
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39 gaping | |
adj.口的;张口的;敞口的;多洞穴的v.目瞪口呆地凝视( gape的现在分词 );张开,张大 | |
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40 strutted | |
趾高气扬地走,高视阔步( strut的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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41 gutter | |
n.沟,街沟,水槽,檐槽,贫民窟 | |
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42 aphorisms | |
格言,警句( aphorism的名词复数 ) | |
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43 compendiously | |
adv.扼要地;简要地;摘要地;简洁地 | |
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44 prodigious | |
adj.惊人的,奇妙的;异常的;巨大的;庞大的 | |
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45 fully | |
adv.完全地,全部地,彻底地;充分地 | |
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46 prolixity | |
n.冗长,罗嗦 | |
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47 hieroglyphics | |
n.pl.象形文字 | |
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48 troglodytes | |
n.类人猿( troglodyte的名词复数 );隐居者;穴居者;极端保守主义者 | |
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49 alias | |
n.化名;别名;adv.又名 | |
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50 valiant | |
adj.勇敢的,英勇的;n.勇士,勇敢的人 | |
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51 lurking | |
潜在 | |
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52 privately | |
adv.以私人的身份,悄悄地,私下地 | |
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53 scribbling | |
n.乱涂[写]胡[乱]写的文章[作品]v.潦草的书写( scribble的现在分词 );乱画;草草地写;匆匆记下 | |
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54 applied | |
adj.应用的;v.应用,适用 | |
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55 vouchers | |
n.凭证( voucher的名词复数 );证人;证件;收据 | |
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56 proficients | |
精通的,熟练的( proficient的名词复数 ) | |
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57 positively | |
adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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58 testimony | |
n.证词;见证,证明 | |
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59 whatsoever | |
adv.(用于否定句中以加强语气)任何;pron.无论什么 | |
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