I slam the door shut and count to ten. But when Izzy moves toward the gas oven and starts looking for thecleaning controls, I lose my cool. “Sylvia doesn’t need cleaning.”
“That’s another thing: Sylvia the oven. Smilla the Fridge. Do we really need to name our kitchenappliances?”
My kitchen appliances. Mine, not ours, goddammit. “I’m totally getting why Janet broke up with you,” Imutter.
At that, Izzy looks up, stricken. “You are horrible,” she says. “You are horrible and after I was born I shouldhave sewed Mom shut.” She runs to the bathroom in tears.
Isobel is three minutes older than me, but I’ve always been the one who takes care of her. I’m her nuclearbomb: when there’s something upsetting her, I go in and lay waste to it, whether that’s one of our six olderbrothers teasing her or the evil Janet, who decided2 she wasn’t gay after seven years into a committedrelationship with Izzy. Growing up, Izzy was the Goody Two-shoes and I was the one who came up fighting—swinging my fists or shaving my head to get a rise out of our parents or wearing combat boots with myhigh school uniform. Yet now that we’re thirty-two, I’m a card-carrying member of the Rat Race; while Izzyis a lesbian who builds jewelry3 out of paper clips and bolts. Go figure.
The door to the bathroom doesn’t lock, but Izzy doesn’t know that yet. So I walk in and wait till she finishessplashing cold water on her face, and I hand her a towel. “Iz. I didn’t mean it.”
“I know.” She looks at me in the mirror. Most people can’t tell us apart now that I have a real job thatrequires conventional hair and conventional clothes. “At least you had a relationship,” I point out. “The lasttime I had a date was when I bought that yogurt.”
Izzy’s lips curve, and she turns to me. “Does the toilet have a name?”
“I was thinking of Janet,” I say, and my sister cracks up.
The telephone rings, and I go into the living room to answer it.
“Julia? This is Judge DeSalvo calling. I’ve got a case that needs a guardian4 ad litem, and I’m hoping youmight be able to help me out.”
I became a guardian ad litem a year ago, when I realized that nonprofit work wasn’t covering my rent. AGAL is appointed by a court to be a child’s advocate during legal proceedings6 that involve a minor7. You don’thave to be a lawyer to be trained as a GAL5, but you do have to have a moral compass and a heart. Which,actually, probably renders most lawyers unqualified for the job.
“Julia? Are you there?”
I would turn cartwheels for Judge DeSalvo; he pulled strings8 to get me a job when I first became a GAL.
“Whatever you need,” I promise. “What’s going on?”
He gives me background information—phrases like medical emancipation9 and thirteen and mother with legalbackground float by me. Only two items stick fast: the word urgent, and the name of the attorney.
God, I can’t do this.
“I can be there in an hour,” I say.
“Good. Because I think this kid needs someone in her corner.”
“Who was that?” Izzy asks. She is unpacking10 the box that holds her work supplies: tools and wire and littlecontainers of metal bits that sound like teeth gnashing when she sets them down.
“A judge,” I reply. “There’s a girl who needs help.”
What I don’t tell my sister is that I’m talking about me.
Nobody’s home at the Fitzgerald house. I ring the doorbell twice, certain this must be a mistake. From whatJudge DeSalvo’s led me to believe, this is a family in crisis. But I find myself standing11 in front of a well-keptCape, with carefully tended flower gardens lining12 the walk.
When I turn around to go back to my car, I see the girl. She still has that knobby, calf-like look of preteens;she jumps over every sidewalk crack. “Hi,” I say, when she is close enough to hear me. “Are you Anna?”
Her chin snaps up. “Maybe.”
“I’m Julia Romano. Judge DeSalvo asked me to be your guardian ad litem. Did he explain to you what thatis?”
Anna narrows her eyes. “There was a girl in Brockton who got kidnapped by someone who said they’d beenasked by her mom to pick her up and drive her to the place where her mom worked.”
I rummage13 in my purse and pull out my driver’s license14, and a stack of papers. “Here,” I say. “Be my guest.”
She glances at me, and then at the god-awful picture on my license; she reads through the copy of theemancipation petition I picked up at the family court before I came here. If I am a psychotic killer15, then Ihave done my homework well. But there is a part of me already giving Anna credit for being wary16: this is nota child who rushes headlong into situations. If she’s thinking long and hard about going off with me,presumably she must have thought long and hard about untangling herself from the net of her family.
She hands back everything I’ve given her. “Where is everyone?” she asks.
“I don’t know. I thought you could tell me.”
Anna’s gaze slides to the front door, nervous. “I hope nothing happened to Kate.”
I tilt17 my head, considering this girl, who has already managed to surprise me. “Do you have time to talk?” Iask.
The zebras are the first stop in the Roger Williams Zoo. Of all the animals in the Africa section, these havealways been my favorite. I can give or take elephants; I never can find the cheetah—but the zebras captivateme. They’d be one of the few things that would fit if we were lucky enough to live in a world that’s black orwhite.
We pass blue duikers, bongos, and something called a naked mole18 rat that doesn’t come out of its cave. Ioften take kids to the zoo when I’m assigned to their cases. Unlike when we sit down face-to-face in thecourthouse, or even at Dunkin’ Donuts, at the zoo they are more likely to open up to me. They’ll watch thegibbons swinging around like Olympic gymnasts and just start talking about what happens at home, withouteven realizing what they are doing.
Anna, though, is older than all of the kids I’ve worked with, and less than thrilled to be here. In retrospect19, Irealize this was a bad choice. I should have taken her to a mall, to a movie.
We walk through the winding20 trails of the zoo, Anna talking only when forced to respond. She answers mepolitely when I ask her questions about her sister’s health. She says that her mother is, indeed, the opposingattorney. She thanks me when I buy her an ice cream.
“Tell me what you like to do,” I say. “For fun.”
“Play hockey,” Anna says. “I used to be a goaltender.”
“Used to be?”
“The older you get, the less the coach forgives you if you miss a game.” She shrugs21. “I don’t like letting awhole team down.”
Interesting way to put it, I think. “Do your friends still play hockey?”
“Friends?” She shakes her head. “You can’t really have anyone over to your house when your sister needs tobe resting. You don’t get invited back for sleepovers when your mom comes to pick you up at two in themorning to go to the hospital. It’s probably been a while since you’ve been in middle school, but most peoplethink freakhood is contagious22.”
“So who do you talk to?”
She looks at me. “Kate,” she says. Then she asks if I have a cell phone.
I take one out of my pocketbook and watch her dial the hospital’s number by heart. “I’m looking for apatient,” Anna says to the operator. “Kate Fitzgerald?” She glances up at me. “Thanks anyway.” Punching thebuttons, she hands the phone back to me. “Kate isn’t registered.”
“That’s good, right?”
“It could just mean that the paperwork hasn’t caught up to the operator yet. Sometimes it takes a few hours.”
I lean against a railing near the elephants. “You seem pretty worried about your sister right now,” I point out.
“Are you sure you’re ready to face what’s going to happen if you stop being a donor23?”
“I know what’s going to happen.” Anna’s voice is low. “I never said I liked it.” She raises her face to mine,challenging me to find fault with her.
For a minute I look at her. What would I do, if I found out that Izzy needed a kidney, or part of my liver, ormarrow? The answer isn’t even questionable—I would ask how quickly we could go to the hospital and haveit done.
But then, it would have been my choice, my decision.
“Have your parents ever asked you if you want to be a donor for your sister?”
Anna shrugs. “Kind of. The way parents ask questions that they already have answered in their heads. Youweren’t the reason that the whole second grade stayed in for recess24, were you? Or, You want some broccoli,right?”
“Did you ever tell your parents that you weren’t comfortable with the choice they’d made for you?”
Anna pushes away from the elephants and begins to trudge25 up the hill. “I might have complained a couple oftimes. But they’re Kate’s parents, too.”
Small tumblers in this puzzle begin to hitch26 for me. Traditionally, parents make decisions for a child, becausepresumably they are looking out for his or her best interests. But if they are blinded, instead, by the bestinterests of another one of their children, the system breaks down. And somewhere, underneath27 all the rubble,are casualties like Anna.
The question is, did she instigate28 this lawsuit29 because she truly feels that she can make better choices abouther own medical care than her parents can, or because she wants her parents to hear her for once when shecries?
We wind up in front of the polar bears, Trixie and Norton. For the first time since we’ve gotten here, Anna’sface lights up. She watches Kobe, Trixie’s cub—the newest addition to the zoo. He swats at his mother as shelies on the rocks, trying to get her to play. “The last time there was a polar bear baby,” Anna says, “they gaveit to another zoo.”
She is right; memories of the articles in the ProJo swim into my mind. It was a big public relations move forRhode Island.
“Do you think he wonders what he did to get himself sent away?”
We are trained, as guardians30 ad litem, to see the signs of depression. We know how to read body language,and flat affect, and mood swings. Anna’s hands are clenched31 around the metal railing. Her eyes go dull as oldgold.
Either this girl loses her sister, I think, or she’s going to lose herself.
“Julia,” she asks, “would it be okay if we went home?”
The closer we get to her house, Anna distances herself from me. A pretty nifty trick, given that the physicalspace between us remains32 unaltered. She shrinks against the window of my car, staring at the streets thatbleed by. “What happens next?”
“I’m going to talk to everyone else. Your mom and dad, your brother and sister. Your lawyer.”
Now a dilapidated Jeep is parked in the driveway, and the front door of the house is open. I turn off theignition, but Anna makes no move to release her seat belt. “Will you walk me in?”
“Why?”
“Because my mother’s going to kill me.”
This Anna—genuinely skittish—bears little resemblance to the one I’ve spent the past hour with. I wonderhow a girl might be both brave enough to instigate a lawsuit, and afraid to face her own mother. “Howcome?”
“I sort of left today without telling her where I was going.”
“You do that a lot?”
Anna shakes her head. “Usually I do whatever I’m told.”
Well, I am going to have to speak to Sara Fitzgerald sooner or later. I get out of the car, and wait for Anna todo the same. We walk up the front path, past the groomed33 flower beds, and through the front door.
She is not the foe34 I’ve built her up to be. For one thing, Anna’s mother is shorter than I am, and slighter. Shehas dark hair and haunted eyes and is pacing. The moment it creaks open, she runs to Anna. “For God’ssake,” she cries, shaking her daughter by the shoulders, “where have you been? Do you have any idea—”
“Excuse me, Mrs. Fitzgerald. I’d like to introduce myself.” I step forward, extending my hand. “I’m JuliaRomano, the guardian ad litem appointed by the court.”
She slides her arm around Anna, a stiff show of tenderness. “Thank you for bringing Anna home. I’m sureyou have lots to discuss with her, but right now—”
“Actually, I was hoping I could speak to you. I’ve been asked by the court to present my findings in less thana week, so if you’ve got a few minutes—”
“I don’t,” Sara says abruptly35. “Now isn’t really a good time. My other daughter has just been readmitted tothe hospital.” She looks at Anna, still standing in the doorway36 of the kitchen: I hope you’re happy.
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“I am too.” Sara clears her throat. “I appreciate you coming by to talk to Anna. And I know you’re just doingyour job. But this is all going to work itself out, really. It’s a misunderstanding. I’m sure Judge DeSalvo willbe telling you that in a day or so.”
She takes a step backward, challenging me—and Anna—to say otherwise. I glance at Anna, who catches myeye and shakes her head almost imperceptibly, a plea to just let this go for now.
Who is she protecting—her mother, or herself?
A red flag unravels37 across my mind: Anna is thirteen. Anna lives with her mother. Anna’s mother is opposingcounsel. How can Anna possibly live in the same home and not be swayed by Sara Fitzgerald?
“Anna, I’ll call you tomorrow.” Then without saying good-bye to Sara Fitzgerald, I leave her house, headedfor the one place on earth I never wanted to go.
The law offices of Campbell Alexander look exactly the way I’ve pictured them: at the top of a building castin black glass, at the end of a hallway lined with a Persian runner, through two heavy mahogany doors thatkeep out the riffraff. Sitting at the massive receptionist’s desk is a girl with porcelain38 features and a telephoneearpiece hidden under the mane of her hair. I ignore her and walk toward the only closed door. “Hey!” sheyells. “You can’t go in there!”
“He’ll be expecting me,” I say.
Campbell doesn’t look up from whatever he’s writing with great fury. His shirtsleeves are rolled up to theelbow. He needs a haircut. “Kerri,” he says, “see if you can find some Jenny Jones transcript39 about identicaltwins who don’t know that they—”
“Hello, Campbell.”
First, he stops writing. Then he lifts his head. “Julia.” He gets to his feet, a schoolboy caught in an indecentact.
I step inside and close the door behind me. “I’m the guardian ad litem assigned to Anna Fitzgerald’s case.”
A dog that I haven’t noticed till now takes its place by Campbell’s side. “I’d heard that you went to lawschool.”
Harvard. On full scholarship.
“Providence is a pretty tight place…I kept expecting…” His voice trails off, and he shakes his head. “Well, Ithought for sure we’d run into each other before now.”
He smiles at me, and I suddenly am seventeen again—the year I realized love doesn’t follow the rules, theyear I understood that nothing is worth having so much as something unattainable. “It’s not all that hard toavoid someone, when you want to,” I answer coolly. “You of all people should know.”
点击收听单词发音
1 democrats | |
n.民主主义者,民主人士( democrat的名词复数 ) | |
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2 decided | |
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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3 jewelry | |
n.(jewllery)(总称)珠宝 | |
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4 guardian | |
n.监护人;守卫者,保护者 | |
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5 gal | |
n.姑娘,少女 | |
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6 proceedings | |
n.进程,过程,议程;诉讼(程序);公报 | |
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7 minor | |
adj.较小(少)的,较次要的;n.辅修学科;vi.辅修 | |
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8 strings | |
n.弦 | |
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9 emancipation | |
n.(从束缚、支配下)解放 | |
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10 unpacking | |
n.取出货物,拆包[箱]v.从(包裹等)中取出(所装的东西),打开行李取出( unpack的现在分词 );拆包;解除…的负担;吐露(心事等) | |
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11 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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12 lining | |
n.衬里,衬料 | |
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13 rummage | |
v./n.翻寻,仔细检查 | |
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14 license | |
n.执照,许可证,特许;v.许可,特许 | |
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15 killer | |
n.杀人者,杀人犯,杀手,屠杀者 | |
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16 wary | |
adj.谨慎的,机警的,小心的 | |
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17 tilt | |
v.(使)倾侧;(使)倾斜;n.倾侧;倾斜 | |
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18 mole | |
n.胎块;痣;克分子 | |
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19 retrospect | |
n.回顾,追溯;v.回顾,回想,追溯 | |
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20 winding | |
n.绕,缠,绕组,线圈 | |
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21 shrugs | |
n.耸肩(以表示冷淡,怀疑等)( shrug的名词复数 ) | |
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22 contagious | |
adj.传染性的,有感染力的 | |
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23 donor | |
n.捐献者;赠送人;(组织、器官等的)供体 | |
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24 recess | |
n.短期休息,壁凹(墙上装架子,柜子等凹处) | |
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25 trudge | |
v.步履艰难地走;n.跋涉,费力艰难的步行 | |
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26 hitch | |
v.免费搭(车旅行);系住;急提;n.故障;急拉 | |
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27 underneath | |
adj.在...下面,在...底下;adv.在下面 | |
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28 instigate | |
v.教唆,怂恿,煽动 | |
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29 lawsuit | |
n.诉讼,控诉 | |
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30 guardians | |
监护人( guardian的名词复数 ); 保护者,维护者 | |
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31 clenched | |
v.紧握,抓紧,咬紧( clench的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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32 remains | |
n.剩余物,残留物;遗体,遗迹 | |
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33 groomed | |
v.照料或梳洗(马等)( groom的过去式和过去分词 );使做好准备;训练;(给动物)擦洗 | |
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34 foe | |
n.敌人,仇敌 | |
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35 abruptly | |
adv.突然地,出其不意地 | |
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36 doorway | |
n.门口,(喻)入门;门路,途径 | |
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37 unravels | |
解开,拆散,散开( unravel的第三人称单数 ); 阐明; 澄清; 弄清楚 | |
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38 porcelain | |
n.瓷;adj.瓷的,瓷制的 | |
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39 transcript | |
n.抄本,誊本,副本,肄业证书 | |
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