Perhaps you have traveled abroad to a country wherepeople don't speak your language and you don'tunderstand theirs. You feel a little uncomfortable—evensuspicious—when you can't be understood. Then suddenlyyou meet someone from your own country, maybeyour own state. This person speaks your language, andwhammo, you have a new best friend—for your vacationat least. You might share experiences, opinions, insights,where to find the best restaurants and bargains. You willdoubtless exchange personal information about family30and work. All this and much more because you share alanguage. That's rapport by chance. Maybe your enthusiasmwill lead you to continue that friendship afterreturning home, only to discover that apart from languageand location the two of you have nothing in commonand the relationship fizzles out all by itself.
This isn't limited to language and geography. Chanceencounters happen on almost a daily basis to all of us—at work, in the supermarket, at the Laundromat or thebus stop.
The key to establishing rapport with strangers isto learn how to become like them. Fortunately,this is both very simple and a lot of fun to do. Itallows you to look on each new encounter as apuzzle, a game, a joy.
Rapport by DesignWWhen the interests or the behavior of two or morepeople are synchronized, these people are saidto be in rapport. As we already know, rapport can happenin response to a shared interest or when you findyourself in certain situations or circumstances. Butwhen none of these conditions is present, there is away to establish rapport "by design"—and that's whatthis book is about.
