A FEW years past, money being made current in our province for carrying onwars, and to be called in again by taxes laid on the inhabitants, my mind wasoften affected1 with the thoughts of paying such taxes; and I believe it rightfor me to preserve a memorandum2 concerning it. I was told that Friends inEngland frequently paid taxes, when the money was applied3 to such purposes. Ihad conversation with several noted4 Friends on the subject, who all favouredthe payment of such taxes; some of them I preferred before myself, and thismade me easier for a time; yet there was in the depth of my mind a scruplewhich I never could get over; and at certain times I was greatly distressed7 onthat account.
I believed that there were some upright-hearted men who paid such taxes, yetcould not see that their example was a sufficient reason for me to do so, whileI believe that the Spirit of truth required of me, as an individual, to sufferpatiently the distress6 of goods, rather than pay actively8.
To refuse the active payment of a tax which our Society generally paid wasexceedingly disagreeable; but to do a thing contrary to my conscience appearedyet more dreadful. When this exercise came upon me, I knew of none under thelike difficulty; and in my distress I besought9 the Lord to enable me to give upall, that so I might follow Him wheresoever He was pleased to lead me. Underthis exercise I went to our Yearly Meeting at Philadelphia in the year 1755; atwhich a committee was appointed of some from each Quarterly Meeting, tocorrespond with the meeting for sufferers in London; and another to visit ourMonthly and Quarterly Meetings. After their appointment, before the lastadjournment of the meeting, it was agreed that these two committees should meettogether in Friends' school-house in the city, to consider some things in whichthe cause of truth was concerned. They accordingly had a weighty conference in the fear of the Lord; at which time I perceived there were many Friends under ascruple like that before mentioned.(1)As scrupling10 to pay a tax on account of the application hath seldom beenheard of heretofore, even amongst men of integrity, who have steadily11 bornetheir testimony12 against outward wars in their time, I may therefore note somethings which have occurred to my mind, as I have been inwardly exercised onthat account. From the steady opposition13 which faithful Friends in early timesmade to wrong things then approved, they were hated and persecuted14 by menliving in the spirit of this world, and suffering with firmness, they were madea blessing15 to the Church, and the work prospered16. It equally concerns men inevery age to take heed17 to their own spirits; and in comparing their situationwith ours, to me it appears that there was less danger of their being infectedwith the spirit of this world, in paying such taxes, than is the case with usnow. They had little or no share in civil government, and many of them declaredthat they were, through the power of God, separated from the spirit in whichwars were, and being afflicted18 by the rulers on account of their testimony,there was less likelihood of their uniting in spirit with them in thingsinconsistent with the purity of truth.
We, from the first settlement of this land, have known little or no troublesof that sort. The profession of our predecessors20 was for a time accountedreproachful, but at length, their uprightness being understood by the rulers,and their innocent sufferings moving them, our way of worship was tolerated,and many of our members in these colonies became active in civil government.
Being thus tried with favour and prosperity, this world appeared inviting21; ourminds have been turned to the improvement of our country, to merchandise andthe sciences, amongst which are many things useful, if followed in pure wisdom;but in our present condition I believe it will not be denied that a carnal mindis gaining upon us. Some of our members, who are officers in civil government,are, in one case or other, called upon in their respective stations to assistin things relative to the wars; but being in doubt whether to act or to craveto be excused from their office, if they see their brethren united in thepayment of a tax to carry on the said wars, may think their case not muchdifferent, and so might quench22 the tender movings of the Holy Spirit in theirminds. Thus, by small degrees, we might approach so near to fighting that thedistinction would be little else than the name of a peaceable people.
It requires great self-denial and resignation of ourselves to God, to attainthat state wherein we can freely cease from fighting when wrongfully invaded,if, by our fighting, there were a probability of overcoming the invaders24.
Whoever rightly attains25 to it does in some degree feel that spirit in which ourRedeemer gave His life for us; and through divine goodness many of ourpredecessors, and many now living, have learned this blessed lesson; but manyothers, having their religion chiefly by education, and not being enough acquainted with that cross which crucifies to the world, do manifest a temperdistinguishable from that of an entire trust in God. In calmly consideringthese things, it hath not appeared strange to me that an exercise hath nowfallen upon some, which, with respect to the outward means, is different fromwhat was known to many of those who went before us.
Some time after the Yearly Meeting, the said committees met at Philadelphia,and, by adjournments, continued sitting several days. The calamities26 of warwere now increasing; the frontier inhabitants of Pennsylvania were frequentlysurprised, some were slain27, and many taken captive by the Indians; and whilethese committees sat, the corpse28 of one so slain was brought in a waggon29, andtaken through the streets of the city in his bloody30 garments, to alarm thepeople and rouse them to war.
Friends thus met were not all of one mind in relation to the tax, which, tothose who scrupled31 it, made the way more difficult. To refuse an active paymentat such a time might be construed32 into an act of disloyalty, and appearedlikely to displease33 the rulers not only here but in England; still there was ascruple so fixed34 on the minds of many Friends that nothing moved it. It was aconference the most weighty that ever I was at, and the hearts of many werebowed in reverence35 before the Most High. Some Friends of the said committeeswho appeared easy to pay the tax, after several adjournments, withdrew; othersof them continued till the last. At length an epistle of tender love andcaution to Friends in Pennsylvania was drawn36 up, and being read several timesand corrected, was signed by such as were free to sign it, and afterward37 sentto the Monthly and Quarterly Meetings.
Ninth of Eighth Month, 1757. -- Orders came at night to the military officersin our county (Burlington), directing them to draft the militia38, and prepare anumber of men to go off as soldiers, to the relief of the English at FortWilliam Henry, in New York government; a few days after which there was ageneral review of the militia at Mount Holly39, and a number of men were chosenand sent off under some officers. Shortly after, there came orders to draftthree times as many, who were to hold themselves in readiness to march whenfresh orders came. On the 17th there was a meeting of the military officers atMount Holly, who agreed on draft; orders were sent to the men so chosen to meettheir respective captains at set times and places, those in our township tomeet at Mount Holly, amongst whom were a considerable number of our Society. Mymind being affected herewith, I had fresh opportunity to see and consider theadvantage of living in the real substance of religion, where practice dothharmonize with principle. Amongst the officers are men of understanding, whohave some regard to sincerity40 where they see it; and when such in the executionof their office have men to deal with whom they believe to be upright-hearted,it is a painful task to put them to trouble on account of scruples41 ofconscience, and they will be likely to avoid it as much as easily may be. But where men profess19 to be so meek42 and heavenly-minded, and to have their trust sofirmly settled in God that they cannot join in wars, and yet by their spiritand conduct in common life manifest a contrary disposition43, their difficultiesare great at such a time.
When officers who are anxiously endeavouring to get troops to answer thedemands of their superiors see men who are insincere pretend scruples ofconscience in hopes of being excused from a dangerous employment, it is likelythey will be roughly handled. In this time of commotion44 some of our young menleft these parts and tarried abroad till it was over; some came, and proposedto go as soldiers; others appeared to have a real tender scruple5 in their mindsagainst joining in wars, and were much humbled45 under the apprehension46 of atrial so near. I had conversation with several of them to my satisfaction. Whenthe captain came to town, some of the last-mentioned went and told him insubstance as follows: -- That they could not bear arms for conscience' sake;nor could they hire any to go in their places, being resigned as to the event.
At length the captain acquainted them all that they might return home for thepresent, but he required them to provide themselves as soldiers, and be inreadiness to march when called upon. This was such a time as I had not seenbefore; and yet I may say, with thankfulness to the Lord, that I believed thetrial was intended for our good; and I was favoured with resignation to Him.
The French army having taken the fort they were besieging47, destroyed it andwent away; the company of men who were first drafted, after some days' march,had orders to return home, and those on the second draft were no more calledupon on that occasion.
Fourth of Fourth Month, 1758. -- Orders came to some officers in Mount Hollyto prepare quarters for a short time for about one hundred soldiers. An officerand two other men, all inhabitants of our town, came to my house. The officertold me that he came to desire me to provide lodging48 and entertainment for twosoldiers, and that six shillings a week per man would be allowed as pay for it.
The case being new and unexpected, I made no answer suddenly, but sat a timesilent, my mind being inward. I was fully23 convinced that the proceedings49 inwars are inconsistent with the purity of the Christian50 religion; and to behired to entertain men, who were then under pay as soldiers, was a difficultywith me. I expected they had legal authority for what they did; and after ashort time I said to the officer, If the men are sent here for entertainment, Ibelieve I shall not refuse to admit them into my house, but the nature of thecase is such that I expect I cannot keep them on hire. One of the men intimatedthat he thought I might do it consistently with my religious principles. Towhich I made no reply, believing silence at that time best for me. Though theyspake of two, there came only one, who tarried at my house about two weeks, andbehaved himself civilly. When the officer came to pay me, I told him I couldnot take pay, having admitted him into my house in a passive obedience51 to authority. I was on horseback when he spake to me, and as I turned from him, hesaid he was obliged to me; to which I said nothing; but, thinking on theexpression, I grew uneasy; and afterwards, being near where he lived, I wentand told him on what grounds I refused taking pay for keeping the soldier.
I have been informed that Thomas a Kempis lived and died in the professionof the Roman Catholic religion; and, in reading his writings, I have believedhim to be a man of a true Christian spirit, as fully so as many who diedmartyrs because they could not join with some superstitions52 in that Church. Alltrue Christians53 are of the same spirit, but their gifts are diverse, JesusChrist appointing to each one his peculiar54 office, agreeably to His infinitewisdom.
John Huss contended against the errors which had crept into the Church, inopposition to the Council of Constance, which the historian reports to haveconsisted of some thousand persons. He modestly vindicated55 the cause which hebelieved was right; and though his language and conduct towards his judgesappear to have been respectful, yet he never could be moved from the principlessettled in his mind. To use his own words: "This I most humbly56 require anddesire of you all, even for His sake who is the God of us all, that I be notcompelled to the thing which my conscience doth repugn or strive against." Andagain, in his answer to the Emperor: "I refuse nothing, most noble Emperor,whatsoever the council shall decree or determine upon me, only this one thing Iexcept, that I do not offend God and my conscience."(2) At length, rather thanact contrary to that which he believed the Lord required of him, he chose tosuffer death by fire. Thomas a Kempis, without disputing against the articlesthen generally agreed to, appears to have laboured, by pious57 example as well asby preaching and writing, to promote virtue58 and the inward spiritual religion;and I believe they were both sincere-hearted followers59 of Christ. True charityis an excellent virtue; and sincerely to labour for their good, whose belief inall points doth not agree with ours, is a happy state.
Near the beginning of the year 1758, I went one evening, in company with aFriend, to visit a sick person; and before our return we were told of a womanliving near, who had for several days been disconsolate60, occasioned by a dream,wherein death, and the judgments61 of the Almighty62 after death, were representedto her mind in a moving manner. Her sadness on that account being worn off, theFriend with whom I was in company went to see her, and had some religiousconversation with her and her husband. With this visit they were somewhataffected, and the man, with many tears, expressed his satisfaction. In a shorttime after, the poor man, being on the river in a storm of wind, was with onemore drowned.
Eighth Month, 1758. -- Having had drawings in my mind to be at the QuarterlyMeeting in Chester County, and at some meetings in the county of Philadelphia,I went first to said Quarterly Meeting, which was large. Several weighty matters came under consideration and debate, and the Lord was pleased toqualify some of His servants with strength and firmness to bear the burden ofthe day. Though I said but little, my mind was deeply exercised, and, under asense of God's love, in the anointing and fitting of some young men for hiswork, I was comforted, and my heart was tendered before Him. From hence I wentto the Youth's Meeting at Darby, where my beloved friend and brother BenjaminJones met me by appointment before I left home, to join in the visit. We wereat Radnor, Merion, Richland, North Wales, Plymouth, and Abington meetings, andhad cause to bow in reverence before the Lord, our gracious God, by whose helpway was opened for us from day to day. I was out about two weeks, and rodeabout two hundred miles.
The Monthly Meeting of Philadelphia having been under a concern on account ofsome Friends who this summer (1758) had bought negro slaves, proposed to theirQuarterly Meeting to have the minute reconsidered in the Yearly Meeting, whichwas made last on that subject, and the said Quarterly Meeting appointed acommittee to consider it, and to report to their next. This committee havingmet once and adjourned63, and I, going to Philadelphia to meet a committee of theYearly Meeting, was in town the evening on which the Quarterly Meeting'scommittee met the second time, and finding an inclination64 to sit with them, Iwith some others was admitted, and Friends had a weighty conference on thesubject. Soon after their next Quarterly meeting I heard that the case wascoming to our Yearly Meeting. This brought a weighty exercise upon me, andunder a sense of my own infirmities, and the great danger I felt of turningaside from perfect purity, my mind was often drawn to retire alone, and put upmy prayers to the Lord that He would be graciously pleased to strengthen me;that, setting aside all views of self-interest and the friendship of thisworld, I might stand fully resigned to His holy will.
In this Yearly Meeting several weighty matters were considered, and towardthe last that in relation to dealing65 with persons who purchase slaves. Duringthe several sittings of the said meeting, my mind was frequently covered withinward prayer, and I could say with David, "that tears were my meat day andnight." The case of slave-keeping lay heavy upon me, nor did I find anyengagement to speak directly to any other matter before the meeting. Now whenthis case was opened several faithful Friends spake weightily thereto, withwhich I was comforted; and feeling a concern to cast in my mite66, I said insubstance as follows: -"In the difficulties attending us in this life nothing is more preciousthan the mind of truth inwardly manifested; and it is my earnest desire that inthis weighty matter we may be so truly humbled as to be favoured with a clearunderstanding of the mind of truth, and follow it; this would be of moreadvantage to the Society than any medium not in the clearness of divine wisdom.
The case is difficult to some who have slaves, but if such set aside all self-interest, and come to be weaned from the desire of getting estates, or evenfrom holding them together, when truth requires the contrary, I believe waywill so open that they will know how to steer67 through those difficulties."Many Friends appeared to be deeply bowed under the weight of the work, andmanifested much firmness in their love to the cause of truth and universalrighteousness on the earth. And though none did openly justify68 the practice ofslave-keeping in general, yet some appeared concerned lest the meeting shouldgo into such measures as might give uneasiness to many brethren, alleging69 that,if Friends patiently continued under the exercise, the Lord in His time mightopen a way for the deliverance of these people. Finding an engagement to speak,I said, "My mind is often led to consider the purity of the divine Being, andthe justice of His judgments; and herein my soul is covered with awfulness. Icannot omit to hint of some cases where people have not been treated with thepurity of justice, and the event hath been lamentable70. Many slaves on thiscontinent are oppressed, and their cries have reached the ears of the MostHigh. Such are the purity and certainty of His judgments, that He cannot bepartial in our favour. In infinite love and goodness, He hath opened ourunderstanding from one time to another concerning our duty towards this people,and it is not a time for delay. Should we now be sensible of what He requiresof us, and through a respect to the private interest of some persons, orthrough a regard to some friendships which do not stand on an immutablefoundation, neglect to do our duty in firmness and constancy, still waiting forsome extraordinary means to bring about their deliverance, God may by terriblethings in righteousness answer us in this matter."Many faithful brethren laboured with great firmness, and the love of truth ina good degree prevailed. Several who had negroes expressed their desire that arule might be made to deal with such Friends as offenders71 who bought slaves infuture. To this it was answered that the root of this evil would never beeffectually struck at, until a thorough search was made in the circumstances ofsuch Friends as kept negroes, with respect to the righteousness of theirmotives in keeping them, that impartial72 justice might be administeredthroughout. Several Friends expressed their desire that a visit might be madeto such Friends as kept slaves, and many others said that they believed libertywas the negro's right; to which, at length, no opposition was publicly made. Aminute was made more full on that subject than any heretofore; and the names of several Friends entered who were free to join in a visit to such as keptslaves.
这 几年来本省拨出款项充作战费，并向居民征收战税，我对缴付此类税款心中常觉不安，认为有将此事记录下来的必要。有人告诉我英国方面的朋友们常常为了国家的 对外战争支付税款，我曾经为这事和几位有声望的朋友们交换意见，他们都同意缴纳此类税款。这些人当中有些是我所敬重的，因此使我稍觉安心。可是我心底里确 存在着疑惑，无法排除，有的时候且使我非常痛苦。
我当然知道有些存心正直的人也缴纳此类税款，可是他们的榜样不足成为理由，使我亦同样行，尤其因为我相信真理之灵要我忍受货物被没收的损失，而不要我积极缴付战税。
拒 绝缴纳一种本团体会友多数都愿意缴纳的税款，确实不是一件愉快的事，可是作了与良心相违背的事对我更为可怕。当我有了这种感觉之时，我不知道是否有别人处 在和我相同的困境中。我痛苦地祈求主叫我放弃一切，好跟从祂到祂所要带我去的任何地方。以这样的心境我参加了一七五五年在费城所举行的年会；会中产生了一 个委员会，由每一季会代表组成，目的在与伦敦方面的救灾会相联络。另有一委员会，目的在访问各地月会及季会。在指定了这委员会之后和年会最后一次休会之 前，大会同意这两个委员会须在城中朋友会学校举行联席会议，商讨和真道有关的一些问题。因此他们以敬畏上主的心召开这严重的会议，在会中我才知道许多朋友 对缴纳战税问题心中存着同样的疑虑。
为 了税款应用问题而拒绝纳税，这种事在过去很少听到，甚至于那些品德高超，曾坚决反对战争的人，也未注意到这问题；因此我愿意在这里提出我因关怀此事所得到 的启示：由于早期忠信朋友们之坚决反对当代所认可的错误事物，他们曾被属世的人仇视及迫害，可是他们对患难所表现的坚忍精神使教会大得益处，兴旺了福音工 作。每一代的人都必须注意自己的灵。拿早期朋友们的处境和我们目前的处境比较，他们因缴纳此类税款被属世之灵诱迫的危险，实比不上我们现在的危险。当初他 们和政治很少关系，他们当中许多人藉着上帝的能力，曾宣布与战争之事无关，他们所表现的引起了掌权者的憎恨，比较不容易陷入于在不符合真理之纯洁的事上和 属世之灵相结合的危险。至于我们，从最初移居本土，并没有经验到和他们相同的困难。我们先人的信仰虽受批评，但他们的公正终于为统治者所谅解，而他们无辜 受难的情形感动了他们，因此我们的崇拜方式被容忍，我们的会友在这一带地区亦多从事于政治活动。既处身于一种优越兴盛的环境中，世界似乎是很美好的，我们 的心意就倾向于本土的进步，注重商品及科学方面的发展；果能依照真智慧的导引，这些东西当中原有好些是很有用的，可是按照我们目前的情况说，无可否认地， 属世心意已在我们当中占了上风。我们会友中的某些政府官吏有协助有关战争之事的责任，当他们心中疑惑，究竟应当履行职务呢，还是应当辞去职务之时，如果看 见一般会友都在缴纳作战税款，就必认为他们履行职务也无可非议，因此压抑了圣灵在他们心中的感动。这样，一步一步地我们也接近了战争，和亲自参加作战没有 多大分别，只是在名义上自称为爱好和平的人吧了。
要 达到完全放弃战争，甚至受非理侵略，可以藉作战驱逐侵略者时也拒绝战斗那种境界，必须有自我牺牲和完全顺服上帝的精神始可。无论谁达到了这一境界，必能多 少感觉到我们的拯救者为我们舍生的那种精神。藉着神的良善，许多我们的先人和许多现在还活着的人都学会了这一功课；但也有许多人只是从教育去接触宗教，并 未充分认识那世界已被钉在其上的十字架，因此他们所表现的和那完全信托上帝的人所具有的精神大有分别。详细思想这些事之后，我觉得某些人现在得到了一种特 殊的感觉，和前人所经验的不同，那是没有什么可怪异的。
年会过后一些时候，上述委员会乃在费城聚会，继续数日。这时兵灾蔓延，宾夕尼亚边区居民常受突击，有人被杀，也有被印第安人俘获的。正当上述委员会开会时，有一具被杀害者的尸体由货车运至城中，一身血污地通过市街，以此来激发人民的参战情绪。
这 时聚会的朋友们对战税问题意见颇不一致，因而对于那些良心不安的人，问题更增困难。处此紧急时期而拒绝缴纳税款，可能被认为不忠于国家，引起统治者的不 悦，本邦如此，即英国统治者亦必将有同样态度。虽然如此，有许多朋友对这事良心不安，无法解除。这次聚会可说是我所参加过的聚会中最严肃的一次，许多人在 至高者面前谦恭俯首。委员会中有些主张缴纳战税的人在数度休会后即行退出，也有些继续到最后的。末了由一些关心这件事的朋友们草拟了致宾夕尼亚朋友们的一 封充满爱心和警语的信，在会中宣读，并加修改，然后由愿意署名的朋友们签名，寄给该区各地的月会及季会。
一 七五七年八月九日晚，本郡（柏林敦）军官接到命令，要他们就地征召民兵，赴援在纽约亨利威廉要塞为法军及印第安人围困的英军。过了几天，贺里山有了一次民 兵总检阅，被征召的民兵编成队伍，由原来军官带领出发。过了不久，新的命令又到，要征召比前三倍数目的兵员，准备定当，候命开到指定地点。十七日贺里山军 官召开了一次会议，订定了征兵办法，发出命令，着各被选召人员在指定时间地点向各区队长报到，本镇被征者均须在贺里山集中，其中颇多为本会会友。这事很感 动我，使我有新的机会看见到信行如一，有真实宗教生活的人是如何有益的。军官当中有些人颇能同情别人，且知道尊重别人诚实的意见。在执行职务时他们很愿意 避免以使人良心不安的事加给别人。可是若有人宣布自己虔敬属灵，且因完全信托上帝，所以不能从事争战，而其行为及日常生活所表现的却与自己所宣布的相违 背，那么他们就要面对着重大的难关了。
当 军官们急于欲征足名额，以应上峰命令之时，看见有些人假藉良心名义，企图规避这种危险职务，他们对这种人必将以严厉手段对付。在这种动乱之时，有些本会的 年青人离家他往，逗留异地，待平静后才回来；也有些人前来，愿意从军。那些确因良心不愿从事争战的人，此时存着谦虚之心，承受试炼。我曾和他们当中的一些 人谈话，颇觉满意。到了指定时间，队长来到镇上，这些人往见队长，告诉他为了良心缘故，他们不能当兵，也不能雇人替代，只愿将这等事付托上帝。最后队长吩 咐他们暂时都回家去，但须备妥军装，在征召时应召出征。这真是从未见过的一种情形，但我敢以感谢之心说，这种试炼是为着我们的益处安排的，我愿意完全信托 祂。此时法军已占领了他们所围攻的要塞，把它毁了，然后撤退。我们方面所征召的第一批兵员进军数日，又奉命归回；第二批征召的人则不再集中。
一 七五八年四月四日贺里山军官接到命令为约百名士兵准备短期宿处，为着这事有一位军官和两位本地居民前来见我。军官说明来意，要我招待两名士兵，供给食宿， 每名士兵每周可支付六先令。我过去不曾遇着同样要求，事出意外，因此不即回答。静坐默祷片刻之后，我心中明白凡属战争之事都和宗教之纯洁性不相符合，要我 接受酬报来招待职业士兵，对我实在是一件难事。我认为他们所行的有法律根据，于是向军官说，如果当局指定士兵前来要我招待，我不至于拒绝，只是此事的意义 与战争有关，我不愿接受酬报；他们当中一人说他认为所做的和我的宗教信仰不相抵触，对此我未回答，因为我相信此时最好缄默。他们原说要指派两名士兵前来， 但以后来的只有一名，他逗留我家约两星期，行为颇为文雅。以后那军官要还钱，我告诉他我不愿意接受，因我之接待那兵士是为了服从当局命令。当那军官和我说 话之时我是骑在马背上，我回转身时他说他很感谢我，我对此未作回答，可是想起他说这话的表情使我很不安心，所以事后我到他家（因偶而在他家附近有事）见 他，私下告诉他我所以拒绝接受招待那名士兵的酬报的理由。
据我知道，垦普斯始终是罗马教会的信徒；从阅读他的作品，我相信他是具有真基督徒精神的人，和一切因拒绝接受天主教某些迷信教义而殉难的人相同。其实一切真基督教都出自同一的灵，只是恩赐各有不同，耶稣基督凭着祂的无穷智慧，以不同职务交给每一个信徒。
胡 司约翰反对那些潜入于教会的谬误教义，和史家所记载的那个由千人组成的康士坦思会议相抗拒。他温和地为他所认为对的辩护；他向审判官所说的话和所表现的态 度虽甚谦恭，可是他心中所信的原则却绝不动摇。他说过这样的话：“我恳切地要求你们，在我们众人的上帝名下，请不要强迫我接受我良心所反对的事。”以后在 他回答皇帝的话中，他说：“尊贵的皇上呀，大会对我所作的任何判决我都不加拒绝，惟有一个例外，就是我不冒犯上帝和我自己的良心！”终于他宁愿接受焚刑而 死，不愿顺服那他认为和主命他信守者相违反的。垦普斯对于当代教会所同意的条例虽未发言反对，但他以虔敬的榜样，以宣讲及写作努力宣扬那内在属灵的宗教。 我相信上述二人都是基督忠诚的仆人。真的宽仁是一种极高尚美德，所以那些诚恳地为他们所信之善努力的人，即使所主张的各点和我们的未尽相同，也是值得欣喜 的事。
一 七五八年年初，有一晚我和朋友同往探访一位病人；在我们回来之前，有人告诉我们附近一妇人因在梦境中遭遇死亡及死后全能者审判之事，好几天陷于悲伤中，以 后逐渐复原；与我同行的那位朋友前往见她，和她及她丈夫谈话，涉及她一向的生活态度问题。这一访问相当地影响了他们，尤其是那丈夫，曾流泪表示满意我那位 朋友的访问。不久这人在河上遇着风暴，他和另一人同遭灭顶之祸。
一 九五八年八月，我心受感动愿往拆斯特郡参加季会，同时参加费城区的一些聚会。我先到了季会地方，这会规模颇大。好些问题在会中提出讨论。主的恩典将力量及 决心赐给祂的一些仆人，叫他们能够荷负重担。我虽然很少说话，但心中深受感动。我很感觉到上帝的爱，在设立一些年青人为祂的事工服役时，在祂面前我心中颇 得安慰。从这里又往参加在达拜举行的青年聚会，见到了好友钟士，他在我离家前同我约好来此相会，一同作访问工作。我们曾参加刺德涅，麦立温，里士兰，北威 尔斯，普里穆斯，和阿丙敦诸地的聚会，时刻感觉到应该谦恭地感谢那施恩帮助我们，每日为我们开路的神。这回我出门两星期，经过的旅程约二百里。
某 夜有朋友访问我们住处，这人是一位保安官，他以友善态度提出关于不纳税支持战争这一问题，并说他知道我对缴纳战税的态度，早就希望有机会找像我这样主张的 人谈谈。于是我们在友善空气中交换意见，并引证一些有关经文。最后他说，根据我们所信守的原则，若遇政府有不良措施，我们所应遵行的似乎宁可让政府没收我 们的货物，而不愿积极地缴款支持它。对这一点我回答说，我们之所以设立公务人员，使居责任地位，是有着良好目的的，有的是要制订好的法律，有的是要维持这 些法律，叫它们不被破坏。倘若这些人并不履行社会所付托给他们的责任，而我们明知其非，仍然付出款项支持他们，就等于是加强了他们的谬误，叫他们忘记了自 己有错。但当我们看清楚了某一事件的性质，知道钱的用途不当，因而良心不安，在谦让中宁愿遭受货物被没收的损失，不愿积极付款，这种与公义相称的表现，确 可促使人们注意他们在公务上的行为。他说他愿意提出一种中庸的办法，那就是，当执政者行动不符合于以政权付托他们的人民之愿望时，人民应即加以抗议，而不 当以拒缴税款对抗，又说，“政府乃是自由人依同意而产生的，由于这种同意，他们有遵守某些法律的义务，作为行动准则。若不遵守，即等于拒绝履行我们自己所 订立的契约。”我回答说，在契约订立时，诚实及正直的精神必叫我们防备，以免在任何事上和真道德相背离。如果我因疏忽的缘故应许服从某人或某些人的命令， 不附带任何条件，而这人或这些人却命令我协助他们做些极严重的恶事，那么我将看出我作这种应许的谬误，且知我若积极地服从命令，必将在某一恶事上更增另一 恶事。所以虽然由于我的应许，我必须接受不服从命令的惩罚，可是在我看来，接受惩罚比服从命令行动更符合道德原则。我们的讨论始终在友善空气中进行。值得 在这里提起的一件事是宾夕尼亚方面许多会友之缴纳战税是违背良心的，因此他们联名上书议会，请求议会不订立法律以强迫征收此类税款，并表示他们是一群和平 的人，为了良心的缘故不能缴纳战税。
费 城月会为了有些朋友在一七五八年夏天买进黑奴的事，向季会建议请求年会重新考虑前此所通过的议案，该议案乃是上届年会所通过的。上述季会乃指派一委员会研 究此事，于下次会期提出报告；这委员会曾召开过一次。当时我来到费城参加年会的一个小组，我在城里时刚好上述委员会召开第二次会议，我心中有了感动，愿意 列席这会。他们容许我和几位朋友们列席；会中对黑奴问题提出严重讨论。不久当他们再一届的季会过后，听说上述建议已经提交我们的年会了；这事使我心中有极 沉重感觉。知道我自己的软弱，也深恐有不能达到完全圣洁的危险，所以我常退隐，向主祈祷，求祂施恩叫我有力量放弃一切私己的观点和属世的情感，完全顺服祂 神圣的旨意。
这 次年会讨论了好些重要事件，临结束时亦讨论关于购买黑奴的事。在历次聚会中，我心中往往充满着内在的祷告，我能够和大卫一同说，“我昼夜以眼泪当饮食。” 畜奴问题在我心中极为沉重；会中神也不许我直接谈论任何其他问题。当畜奴问题被提出时，有几位诚信的朋友们沉痛发言，我听了颇受安慰，觉得我也应该贡献出 我自己的微薄力量，于是发言如下：
“ 为应付今世所遭遇的一切困难，没有比那在我们内心显明出来的真理更为宝贵的了。我诚恳地愿望我们对这严重问题能够获得真理之心所具有的清楚见解，并跟从这 一见解。这样，对我们团体的益处必较其他任何非出自神圣智慧所昭示的方法更大。对于畜奴的朋友们这确是一大难题，可是如果我们能放弃私己的利益，放弃那不 为真理所支持，企图作大地主的愿望，我们必能找到路径，知道如何对付这些困难。”
对 这问题与会的朋友们似乎都非常关切，且坚定地表示对真理及人间正义的爱心。虽然没有人在会中公开表示赞同畜奴制度；有些人似乎不愿意在聚会中积极地反对， 免得引起畜奴弟兄们的反感。他们认为如果朋友们继续忍耐，当主的时候到来，祂可能开路释放这些奴隶。这时我心里觉得应该发言，于是开口说，“我心常被引领 以思想神的纯洁，和祂判断的公义；在这事上我的灵魂实充满恐惧。我不能不指出在某些情况下，有些人并未受公正的待遇，情形实甚可悲。在本土有许多奴隶遭受 压迫，他们的呼声已达到至高者的耳中，而祂的判断既是纯洁及坚定的，祂决不偏袒我们，祂曾以无穷之爱及良善启迪我们，叫我们明白我们对这些人所应负的责 任，不可延迟。如果我们现在明知祂所要求于我们的，却因尊重某些个人的利益，或顾及那种非建立于永恒基础上的友谊，而忽略了我们所须坚决履行的责任，仍然 盼望有什么奇特方法可叫这些人获得自由，那么上帝对这事或将在祂公义中以可怖的方法答复我们！”
好 些诚信的弟兄们在这件事上坚定努力；对真理的爱心大为增加。有几个畜有黑奴的朋友表示希望团体制订条例，惩罚以后再购买黑奴的人。对他们这种意见的答复乃 是：要根除这种邪恶，必须先行研究朋友们畜奴的环境以及他们的动机，并寻觅公道的处理方法，否则必难收效。有几位朋友表示希望先行访问那些畜奴的朋友；也 有些人认为自由乃黑奴们所应享有的权利，对这一点未见有公然反对的人。最后大家草拟了一项议案，比过去所有的更为详尽，愿意参加访问畜奴会友的那几位朋友 的名字也登记了。
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affected
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| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
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memorandum
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| n.备忘录，便笺 | |
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applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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noted
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| adj.著名的，知名的 | |
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scruple
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| n./v.顾忌，迟疑 | |
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distress
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| n.苦恼，痛苦，不舒适；不幸；vt.使悲痛 | |
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distressed
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| 痛苦的 | |
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actively
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| adv.积极地，勤奋地 | |
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besought
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| v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的过去式和过去分词 )；(beseech的过去式与过去分词) | |
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scrupling
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| v.感到于心不安，有顾忌( scruple的现在分词 ) | |
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steadily
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| adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地 | |
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testimony
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| n.证词；见证，证明 | |
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opposition
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| n.反对，敌对 | |
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persecuted
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| （尤指宗教或政治信仰的）迫害(~sb. for sth.)( persecute的过去式和过去分词 )； 烦扰，困扰或骚扰某人 | |
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blessing
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| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
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prospered
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| 成功，兴旺( prosper的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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heed
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| v.注意，留意；n.注意，留心 | |
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afflicted
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| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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profess
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| v.声称，冒称，以...为业，正式接受入教，表明信仰 | |
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predecessors
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| n.前任( predecessor的名词复数 )；前辈；（被取代的）原有事物；前身 | |
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inviting
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| adj.诱人的，引人注目的 | |
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quench
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| vt.熄灭，扑灭；压制 | |
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fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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invaders
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| 入侵者，侵略者，侵入物( invader的名词复数 ) | |
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attains
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的第三人称单数 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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calamities
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| n.灾祸，灾难( calamity的名词复数 )；不幸之事 | |
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slain
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| 杀死，宰杀，杀戮( slay的过去分词 )； (slay的过去分词) | |
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corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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waggon
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| n.运货马车，运货车；敞篷车箱 | |
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bloody
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| adj.非常的的；流血的；残忍的；adv.很；vt.血染 | |
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scrupled
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| v.感到于心不安，有顾忌( scruple的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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construed
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| v.解释（陈述、行为等）( construe的过去式和过去分词 )；翻译，作句法分析 | |
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displease
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| vt.使不高兴，惹怒；n.不悦，不满，生气 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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reverence
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| n.敬畏，尊敬，尊严；Reverence:对某些基督教神职人员的尊称；v.尊敬，敬畏，崇敬 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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militia
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| n.民兵，民兵组织 | |
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holly
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| n.[植]冬青属灌木 | |
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sincerity
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| n.真诚，诚意；真实 | |
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scruples
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| n.良心上的不安( scruple的名词复数 )；顾虑，顾忌v.感到于心不安，有顾忌( scruple的第三人称单数 ) | |
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meek
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| adj.温顺的，逆来顺受的 | |
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disposition
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| n.性情，性格；意向，倾向；排列，部署 | |
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commotion
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| n.骚动，动乱 | |
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humbled
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| adj. 卑下的，谦逊的，粗陋的 vt. 使 ... 卑下，贬低 | |
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apprehension
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| n.理解，领悟；逮捕，拘捕；忧虑 | |
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besieging
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| 包围，围困，围攻( besiege的现在分词 ) | |
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lodging
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| n.寄宿，住所；(大学生的)校外宿舍 | |
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proceedings
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| n.进程，过程，议程；诉讼(程序)；公报 | |
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Christian
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| adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒 | |
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obedience
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| n.服从，顺从 | |
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superstitions
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| 迷信，迷信行为( superstition的名词复数 ) | |
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Christians
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| n.基督教徒( Christian的名词复数 ) | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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vindicated
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| v.澄清（某人/某事物）受到的责难或嫌疑( vindicate的过去式和过去分词 )；表明或证明（所争辩的事物）属实、正当、有效等；维护 | |
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humbly
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| adv. 恭顺地，谦卑地 | |
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pious
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| adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的 | |
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virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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followers
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| 追随者( follower的名词复数 )； 用户； 契据的附面； 从动件 | |
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disconsolate
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| adj.忧郁的，不快的 | |
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judgments
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| 判断( judgment的名词复数 )； 鉴定； 评价； 审判 | |
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almighty
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| adj.全能的，万能的；很大的，很强的 | |
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adjourned
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| （使）休会， （使）休庭( adjourn的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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inclination
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| n.倾斜；点头；弯腰；斜坡；倾度；倾向；爱好 | |
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dealing
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| n.经商方法，待人态度 | |
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mite
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| n.极小的东西；小铜币 | |
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steer
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| vt.驾驶，为…操舵；引导；vi.驾驶 | |
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justify
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| vt.证明…正当(或有理)，为…辩护 | |
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alleging
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| 断言，宣称，辩解( allege的现在分词 ) | |
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lamentable
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| adj.令人惋惜的，悔恨的 | |
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offenders
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| n.冒犯者( offender的名词复数 )；犯规者；罪犯；妨害…的人（或事物） | |
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impartial
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| adj.(in,to)公正的，无偏见的 | |
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