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Chapter 21
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My father used every day to ride out on horse-back. He had a splendid English mare1, a chestnut2 piebald, with a long slender neck and long legs, an inexhaustible and vicious beast. Her name was Electric. No one could ride her except my father. One day he came up to me in a good humour, a frame of mind in which I had not seen him for a long while; he was getting ready for his ride, and had already put on his spurs. I began entreating3 him to take me with him.

‘We’d much better have a game of leap-frog,’ my father replied. ‘You’ll never keep up with me on your cob.’

‘Yes, I will; I’ll put on spurs too.’

‘All right, come along then.’

We set off. I had a shaggy black horse, strong, and fairly spirited. It is true it had to gallop4 its utmost, when Electric went at full trot5, still I was not left behind. I have never seen any one ride like my father; he had such a fine carelessly easy seat, that it seemed that the horse under him was conscious of it, and proud of its rider. We rode through all the boulevards, reached the ‘Maidens’ Field,’ jumped several fences (at first I had been afraid to take a leap, but my father had a contempt for cowards, and I soon ceased to feel fear), twice crossed the river Moskva, and I was under the impression that we were on our way home, especially as my father of his own accord observed that my horse was tired, when suddenly he turned off away from me at the Crimean ford7, and galloped8 along the river-bank. I rode after him. When he had reached a high stack of old timber, he slid quickly off Electric, told me to dismount, and giving me his horse’s bridle9, told me to wait for him there at the timber-stack, and, turning off into a small street, disappeared. I began walking up and down the river-bank, leading the horses, and scolding Electric, who kept pulling, shaking her head, snorting and neighing as she went; and when I stood still, never failed to paw the ground, and whining10, bite my cob on the neck; in fact she conducted herself altogether like a spoilt thorough-bred. My father did not come back. A disagreeable damp mist rose from the river; a fine rain began softly blowing up, and spotting with tiny dark flecks11 the stupid grey timber-stack, which I kept passing and repassing, and was deadly sick of by now. I was terribly bored, and still my father did not come. A sort of sentry12-man, a Fin6, grey all over like the timber, and with a huge old-fashioned shako, like a pot, on his head, and with a halberd (and how ever came a sentry, if you think of it, on the banks of the Moskva!) drew near, and turning his wrinkled face, like an old woman’s, towards me, he observed, ‘What are you doing here with the horses, young master? Let me hold them.’

I made him no reply. He asked me for tobacco. To get rid of him (I was in a fret13 of impatience14, too), I took a few steps in the direction in which my father had disappeared, then walked along the little street to the end, turned the corner, and stood still. In the street, forty paces from me, at the open window of a little wooden house, stood my father, his back turned to me; he was leaning forward over the window-sill, and in the house, half hidden by a curtain, sat a woman in a dark dress talking to my father; this woman was Zina?da.

I was petrified15. This, I confess, I had never expected. My first impulse was to run away. ‘My father will look round,’ I thought, ‘and I am lost . . . ’ but a strange feeling — a feeling stronger than curiosity, stronger than jealousy16, stronger even than fear — held me there. I began to watch; I strained my ears to listen. It seemed as though my father were insisting on something. Zina?da would not consent. I seem to see her face now — mournful, serious, lovely, and with an inexpressible impress of devotion, grief, love, and a sort of despair — I can find no other word for it. She uttered monosyllables, not raising her eyes, simply smiling — submissively, but without yielding. By that smile alone, I should have known my Zina?da of old days. My father shrugged17 his shoulders, and straightened his hat on his head, which was always a sign of impatience with him. . . . Then I caught the words: ‘Vous devez vous séparer de cette . . . ’ Zina?da sat up, and stretched out her arm. . . . Suddenly, before my very eyes, the impossible happened. My father suddenly lifted the whip, with which he had been switching the dust off his coat, and I heard a sharp blow on that arm, bare to the elbow. I could scarcely restrain myself from crying out; while Zina?da shuddered18, looked without a word at my father, and slowly raising her arm to her lips, kissed the streak19 of red upon it. My father flung away the whip, and running quickly up the steps, dashed into the house. . . . Zina?da turned round, and with outstretched arms and downcast head, she too moved away from the window.

My heart sinking with panic, with a sort of awe-struck horror, I rushed back, and running down the lane, almost letting go my hold of Electric, went back to the bank of the river. I could not think clearly of anything. I knew that my cold and reserved father was sometimes seized by fits of fury; and all the same, I could never comprehend what I had just seen. . . . But I felt at the time that, however long I lived, I could never forget the gesture, the glance, the smile, of Zina?da; that her image, this image so suddenly presented to me, was imprinted20 for ever on my memory. I stared vacantly at the river, and never noticed that my tears were streaming. ‘She is beaten,’ I was thinking, . . . ‘beaten . . . beaten. . . . ’

‘Hullo! what are you doing? Give me the mare!’ I heard my father’s voice saying behind me.

Mechanically I gave him the bridle. He leaped on to Electric . . . the mare, chill with standing21, reared on her haunches, and leaped ten feet away . . . but my father soon subdued22 her; he drove the spurs into her sides, and gave her a blow on the neck with his fist. . . . ‘Ah, I’ve no whip,’ he muttered.

I remembered the swish and fall of the whip, heard so short a time before, and shuddered.

‘Where did you put it?’ I asked my father, after a brief pause.

My father made no answer, and galloped on ahead. I overtook him. I felt that I must see his face.

‘Were you bored waiting for me?’ he muttered through his teeth.

‘A little. Where did you drop your whip?’ I asked again.

My father glanced quickly at me. ‘I didn’t drop it,’ he replied; ‘I threw it away.’ He sank into thought, and dropped his head . . . and then, for the first, and almost for the last time, I saw how much tenderness and pity his stern features were capable of expressing.

He galloped on again, and this time I could not overtake him; I got home a quarter-of-an-hour after him.

‘That’s love,’ I said to myself again, as I sat at night before my writing-table, on which books and papers had begun to make their appearance; ‘that’s passion! . . . To think of not revolting, of bearing a blow from any one whatever . . . even the dearest hand! But it seems one can, if one loves. . . . While I . . . I imagined . . . ’

I had grown much older during the last month; and my love, with all its transports and sufferings, struck me myself as something small and childish and pitiful beside this other unimagined something, which I could hardly fully23 grasp, and which frightened me like an unknown, beautiful, but menacing face, which one strives in vain to make out clearly in the half-darkness. . . .

A strange and fearful dream came to me that same night. I dreamed I went into a low dark room. . . . My father was standing with a whip in his hand, stamping with anger; in the corner crouched24 Zina?da, and not on her arm, but on her forehead, was a stripe of red . . . while behind them both towered Byelovzorov, covered with blood; he opened his white lips, and wrathfully threatened my father.

Two months later, I entered the university; and within six months my father died of a stroke in Petersburg, where he had just moved with my mother and me. A few days before his death he received a letter from Moscow which threw him into a violent agitation25. . . . He went to my mother to beg some favour of her: and, I was told, he positively26 shed tears — he, my father! On the very morning of the day when he was stricken down, he had begun a letter to me in French. ‘My son,’ he wrote to me, ‘fear the love of woman; fear that bliss27, that poison. . . . ’ After his death, my mother sent a considerable sum of money to Moscow.


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 mare Y24y3     
n.母马,母驴
参考例句:
  • The mare has just thrown a foal in the stable.那匹母马刚刚在马厩里产下了一只小马驹。
  • The mare foundered under the heavy load and collapsed in the road.那母马因负载过重而倒在路上。
2 chestnut XnJy8     
n.栗树,栗子
参考例句:
  • We have a chestnut tree in the bottom of our garden.我们的花园尽头有一棵栗树。
  • In summer we had tea outdoors,under the chestnut tree.夏天我们在室外栗树下喝茶。
3 entreating 8c1a0bd5109c6bc77bc8e612f8bff4a0     
恳求,乞求( entreat的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • We have not bound your feet with our entreating arms. 我们不曾用恳求的手臂来抱住你的双足。
  • The evening has come. Weariness clings round me like the arms of entreating love. 夜来到了,困乏像爱的恳求用双臂围抱住我。
4 gallop MQdzn     
v./n.(马或骑马等)飞奔;飞速发展
参考例句:
  • They are coming at a gallop towards us.他们正朝着我们飞跑过来。
  • The horse slowed to a walk after its long gallop.那匹马跑了一大阵后慢下来缓步而行。
5 trot aKBzt     
n.疾走,慢跑;n.老太婆;现成译本;(复数)trots:腹泻(与the 连用);v.小跑,快步走,赶紧
参考例句:
  • They passed me at a trot.他们从我身边快步走过。
  • The horse broke into a brisk trot.马突然快步小跑起来。
6 fin qkexO     
n.鳍;(飞机的)安定翼
参考例句:
  • They swim using a small fin on their back.它们用背上的小鳍游动。
  • The aircraft has a long tail fin.那架飞机有一个长长的尾翼。
7 Ford KiIxx     
n.浅滩,水浅可涉处;v.涉水,涉过
参考例句:
  • They were guarding the bridge,so we forded the river.他们驻守在那座桥上,所以我们只能涉水过河。
  • If you decide to ford a stream,be extremely careful.如果已决定要涉过小溪,必须极度小心。
8 galloped 4411170e828312c33945e27bb9dce358     
(使马)飞奔,奔驰( gallop的过去式和过去分词 ); 快速做[说]某事
参考例句:
  • Jo galloped across the field towards him. 乔骑马穿过田野向他奔去。
  • The children galloped home as soon as the class was over. 孩子们一下课便飞奔回家了。
9 bridle 4sLzt     
n.笼头,束缚;vt.抑制,约束;动怒
参考例句:
  • He learned to bridle his temper.他学会了控制脾气。
  • I told my wife to put a bridle on her tongue.我告诉妻子说话要谨慎。
10 whining whining     
n. 抱怨,牢骚 v. 哭诉,发牢骚
参考例句:
  • That's the way with you whining, puny, pitiful players. 你们这种又爱哭、又软弱、又可怜的赌棍就是这样。
  • The dog sat outside the door whining (to be let in). 那条狗坐在门外狺狺叫着(要进来)。
11 flecks c7d86ea41777cc9990756f19aa9c3f69     
n.斑点,小点( fleck的名词复数 );癍
参考例句:
  • His hair was dark, with flecks of grey. 他的黑发间有缕缕银丝。
  • I got a few flecks of paint on the window when I was painting the frames. 我在漆窗框时,在窗户上洒了几点油漆。 来自《简明英汉词典》
12 sentry TDPzV     
n.哨兵,警卫
参考例句:
  • They often stood sentry on snowy nights.他们常常在雪夜放哨。
  • The sentry challenged anyone approaching the tent.哨兵查问任一接近帐篷的人。
13 fret wftzl     
v.(使)烦恼;(使)焦急;(使)腐蚀,(使)磨损
参考例句:
  • Don't fret.We'll get there on time.别着急,我们能准时到那里。
  • She'll fret herself to death one of these days.她总有一天会愁死的.
14 impatience OaOxC     
n.不耐烦,急躁
参考例句:
  • He expressed impatience at the slow rate of progress.进展缓慢,他显得不耐烦。
  • He gave a stamp of impatience.他不耐烦地跺脚。
15 petrified 2e51222789ae4ecee6134eb89ed9998d     
adj.惊呆的;目瞪口呆的v.使吓呆,使惊呆;变僵硬;使石化(petrify的过去式和过去分词)
参考例句:
  • I'm petrified of snakes. 我特别怕蛇。
  • The poor child was petrified with fear. 这可怜的孩子被吓呆了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
16 jealousy WaRz6     
n.妒忌,嫉妒,猜忌
参考例句:
  • Some women have a disposition to jealousy.有些女人生性爱妒忌。
  • I can't support your jealousy any longer.我再也无法忍受你的嫉妒了。
17 shrugged 497904474a48f991a3d1961b0476ebce     
vt.耸肩(shrug的过去式与过去分词形式)
参考例句:
  • Sam shrugged and said nothing. 萨姆耸耸肩膀,什么也没说。
  • She shrugged, feigning nonchalance. 她耸耸肩,装出一副无所谓的样子。 来自《简明英汉词典》
18 shuddered 70137c95ff493fbfede89987ee46ab86     
v.战栗( shudder的过去式和过去分词 );发抖;(机器、车辆等)突然震动;颤动
参考例句:
  • He slammed on the brakes and the car shuddered to a halt. 他猛踩刹车,车颤抖着停住了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • I shuddered at the sight of the dead body. 我一看见那尸体就战栗。 来自《简明英汉词典》
19 streak UGgzL     
n.条理,斑纹,倾向,少许,痕迹;v.加条纹,变成条纹,奔驰,快速移动
参考例句:
  • The Indians used to streak their faces with paint.印第安人过去常用颜料在脸上涂条纹。
  • Why did you streak the tree?你为什么在树上刻条纹?
20 imprinted 067f03da98bfd0173442a811075369a0     
v.盖印(imprint的过去式与过去分词形式)
参考例句:
  • The terrible scenes were indelibly imprinted on his mind. 那些恐怖场面深深地铭刻在他的心中。
  • The scene was imprinted on my mind. 那个场面铭刻在我的心中。 来自《简明英汉词典》
21 standing 2hCzgo     
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的
参考例句:
  • After the earthquake only a few houses were left standing.地震过后只有几幢房屋还立着。
  • They're standing out against any change in the law.他们坚决反对对法律做任何修改。
22 subdued 76419335ce506a486af8913f13b8981d     
adj. 屈服的,柔和的,减弱的 动词subdue的过去式和过去分词
参考例句:
  • He seemed a bit subdued to me. 我觉得他当时有点闷闷不乐。
  • I felt strangely subdued when it was all over. 一切都结束的时候,我却有一种奇怪的压抑感。
23 fully Gfuzd     
adv.完全地,全部地,彻底地;充分地
参考例句:
  • The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气,然后全部呼出。
  • They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。
24 crouched 62634c7e8c15b8a61068e36aaed563ab     
v.屈膝,蹲伏( crouch的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • He crouched down beside her. 他在她的旁边蹲了下来。
  • The lion crouched ready to pounce. 狮子蹲下身,准备猛扑。
25 agitation TN0zi     
n.搅动;搅拌;鼓动,煽动
参考例句:
  • Small shopkeepers carried on a long agitation against the big department stores.小店主们长期以来一直在煽动人们反对大型百货商店。
  • These materials require constant agitation to keep them in suspension.这些药剂要经常搅动以保持悬浮状态。
26 positively vPTxw     
adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实
参考例句:
  • She was positively glowing with happiness.她满脸幸福。
  • The weather was positively poisonous.这天气着实讨厌。
27 bliss JtXz4     
n.狂喜,福佑,天赐的福
参考例句:
  • It's sheer bliss to be able to spend the day in bed.整天都可以躺在床上真是幸福。
  • He's in bliss that he's won the Nobel Prize.他非常高兴,因为获得了诺贝尔奖金。


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