There were two or three things that I wanted to know. I do not care about a mystery. So I began to inquire.
It took me two weeks to find out what women carry in dress suit cases. And then I began to ask why a mattress1 is made in two pieces. This serious query2 was at first received with suspicion because it sounded like a conundrum3. I was at last assured that its double form of construction was designed to make lighter4 the burden of woman, who makes up beds. I was so foolish as to persist, begging to know why, then, they were not made in two equal pieces; whereupon I was shunned5.
The third draught6 that I craved7 from the fount of knowledge was enlightenment concerning the character known as A Man About Town. He was more vague in my mind than a type should be. We must have a concrete idea of anything, even if it be an imaginary idea, before we can comprehend it. Now, I have a mental picture of John Doe that is as clear as a steel engraving8. His eyes are weak blue; he wears a brown vest and a shiny black serge coat.
He stands always in the sunshine chewing something; and he keeps half-shutting his pocket knife and opening it again with his thumb. And, if the Man Higher Up is ever found, take my assurance for it, he will be a large, pale man with blue wristlets showing under his cuffs9, and he will be sitting to have his shoes polisbed within sound of a bowling10 alley11, and there will be somewhere about him turquoises12.
But the canvas of my imagination, when it came to limning13 the Man About Town, was blank. I fancied that he bad a detachable sneer14 (like the smile of the Cheshire cat) and attached cuffs; and that was all. Whereupon I asked a newspaper reporter about him.
"Why," said he, "a 'Man About Town' something between a 'rounder' and a 'clubman.' He isn't exactly--well, he fits in between Mrs. Fish's receptions and private boxing bouts15. He doesn't--well, he doesn't belong either to the Lotos Club or to the Jerry McGeogheghan Galvanised Iron Workers' Apprentices16' Left Hook Chowder Association. I don't exactly know how to describe him to you. You'll see him everywhere there's anything doing. Yes, I suppose he's a type. Dress clothes every evening; knows the ropes; calls every policeman and waiter in town by their first names. No; he never travels with the hydrogen derivatives17. You generally see him alone or with another man."
My friend the reporter left me, and I wandered further afield. By this time the 3126 electric lights on the Rialto were alight. People passed, but they held me not. Paphian eyes rayed upon me, and left me unscathed. Diners, heimgangers, shop-girls, confidence men, panhandlers, actors, highwaymen, millionaires and outlanders hurried, skipped, strolled, sneaked18, swaggered and scurried19 by me; but I took no note of them. I knew them all; I had read their hearts; they had served. I wanted my Man About Town. He was a type, and to drop him would be an error--a typograph--but no! let us continue.
Let us continue with a moral digression. To see a family reading the Sunday paper gratifies. The sections have been separated. Papa is earnestly scanning the page that pictures the young lady exercising before an open window, and bending--but there, there! Mamma is interested in trying to guess the missing letters in the word N_w Yo_k. The oldest girls are eagerly perusing20 the financial reports, for a certain young man remarked last Sunday night that he had taken a flyer in Q., X. & Z. Willie, the eighteen-year-old son, who attends the New York public school, is absorbed in the weekly article describing how to make over an old skirt, for he hopes to take a prize in sewing on graduation day.
Grandma is holding to the comic supplement with a two-hours' grip; and little Tottie, the baby, is rocking along the best she can with the real estatc transfers. This view is intended to be reassuring21, for it is desirable that a few lines of this story be skipped. For it introduces strong drink.
I went into a cafe to -- and while it was being mixed I asked the man who grabs up your hot Scotch22 spoon as soon as you lay it down what he undcrstood by the term, epithet23, description, designation, characterisation or appellation24, viz.: a "Man About Town."
"Why," said he, carefully, "it means a fly guy that's wise to the all-night push--see? It's a hot sport that you can't bump to the rail anywhere between the Flatirons--see? I guess that's about what it means."
I thanked him and departed.
On the sidewalk a Salvation25 lassie shook her contribution receptacle gently against my waistcoat pocket.
"Would you mind telling me," I asked her, "if you ever meet with the character commonly denominated as 'A Man About Town' during your daily wanderings?"
"I think I know whom you mean," she answered, with a gentle smile. "We see them in the same places night after night. They are the devil's body guard, and if the soldiers of any army are as faithful as they are, their commanders are well served. We go among them, diverting a few pennies from their wickedness to the Lord's service."
She shook the box again and I dropped a dime26 into it.
In front of a glittering hotel a friend of mine, a critic, was climbing from a cab. He seemed at leisure; and I put my question to him. He answered me conscientiously27, as I was sure he would.
"There is a type of 'Man About Town' in New York," he answered. "The term is quite familiar to me, but I don't think I was ever called upon to define the character before. It would be difficult to point you out an exact specimen28. I would say, offhand29, that it is a man who had a hopeless case of the peculiar30 New York disease of wanting to see and know. At 6 o'clock each day life begins with him. He follows rigidly31 the conventions of dress and manners; but in the business of poking32 his nose into places where he does not belong he could give pointers to a civet cat or a jackdaw. He is the man who has chased Bohemia about the town from rathskeller to roof garden and from Hester street to Harlem until you can't find a place in the city where they don't cut their spaghetti with a knife. Your 'Man About Town' has done that. He is always on the scent33 of something new. He is curiosity, impudence34 and omnipresence. Hansoms were made for him, and gold-banded cigars; and the curse of music at dinner. There are not so many of him; but his minority report is adopted everywhere.
"I'm glad you brought up the subject; I've felt the influence of this nocturnal blight35 upon our city, but I never thought to analyse it before. I can see now that your 'Man About Town' should havc been classified long ago. In his wake spring up wine agents and cloak models; and the orchestra 'p1ays 'Let's All Go Up to Maud's' for him, by request, instead of Handel. He makes his rounds every evening; while you and I see the elephant once a week. When the cigar store is raided, he winks36 at the officer, familiar with his ground, and walks away immune, while you and I search among the Presidents for names, and among the stars for addresses to give the desk sergeant37."
My friend, the critic, paused to acquire breath for fresh eloquence38. I seized my advantage.
"You have classified him," I cried with joy. "You have painted his portrait in the gallery of city types. But I must meet one face to face. I must study the Man About Town at first hand. Where shall I find him? How shall I know him?"
Without seeming to hear me, the critic went on. And his cab-driver was waiting for his fare, too.
"He is the sublimated39 essence of Butt-in; the refined, intrinsic extract of Rubber; the concentrated, purified, irrefutable, unavoidable spirit of Curiosity and Inquisitiveness40. A new sensation is the breath in his nostrils41; when his experience is exhausted42 he explores new fields with the indefatigability43 of a--"
"Excuse me," I interrupted, "but can you produce one of this type? It is a new thing to me. I must study it. I will search the town over until I find one. Its habitat must be here on Broadway."
"I am about to dine here," said my friend. "Come inside, and if there is a Man About Town present I will point him out to you. I know most of the regular patrons here."
"I am not dining yet," I said to him. "You will excuse me. I am going to find my Man About Town this night if I have to rake New York from the Battery to Little Coney Island."
I left the hotel and walked down Broadway. The pursuit of my type gave a pleasant savour of life and interest to the air I breathed. I was glad to be in a city so great, so complex and diversified44. Leisurely45 and with something of an air I strolled along with my heart expanding at the thought that I was a citizen of great Gotham, a sharer in its magnificence and pleasures, a partaker in its glory and prestige.
I turned to cross the street. I heard something buzz like a bee, and then I took a long, pleasant ride with Santos-Dumont.
When I opened my eyes I remembered a smell of gasoline, and I said aloud: "Hasn't it passed yet?"
A hospital nurse laid a hand that was not particularly soft upon my brow that was not at all fevered. A young doctor came along, grinned, and handed me a morning newspaper.
"Want to see how it happened?" he asked cheerily. I read the article. Its headlines began where I heard the buzzing leave off the night before. It closed with these lines:
Bellevue Hospital, where it was said that his injuries were not serious. He appeared to be a typica1 Man About Town."
1 mattress | |
n.床垫,床褥 | |
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2 query | |
n.疑问,问号,质问;vt.询问,表示怀疑 | |
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3 conundrum | |
n.谜语;难题 | |
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4 lighter | |
n.打火机,点火器;驳船;v.用驳船运送;light的比较级 | |
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5 shunned | |
v.避开,回避,避免( shun的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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6 draught | |
n.拉,牵引,拖;一网(饮,吸,阵);顿服药量,通风;v.起草,设计 | |
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7 craved | |
渴望,热望( crave的过去式 ); 恳求,请求 | |
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8 engraving | |
n.版画;雕刻(作品);雕刻艺术;镌版术v.在(硬物)上雕刻(字,画等)( engrave的现在分词 );将某事物深深印在(记忆或头脑中) | |
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9 cuffs | |
n.袖口( cuff的名词复数 )v.掌打,拳打( cuff的第三人称单数 ) | |
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10 bowling | |
n.保龄球运动 | |
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11 alley | |
n.小巷,胡同;小径,小路 | |
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12 turquoises | |
n.绿松石( turquoise的名词复数 );青绿色 | |
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13 limning | |
v.画( limn的现在分词 );勾画;描写;描述 | |
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14 sneer | |
v.轻蔑;嘲笑;n.嘲笑,讥讽的言语 | |
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15 bouts | |
n.拳击(或摔跤)比赛( bout的名词复数 );一段(工作);(尤指坏事的)一通;(疾病的)发作 | |
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16 apprentices | |
学徒,徒弟( apprentice的名词复数 ) | |
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17 derivatives | |
n.衍生性金融商品;派生物,引出物( derivative的名词复数 );导数 | |
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18 sneaked | |
v.潜行( sneak的过去式和过去分词 );偷偷溜走;(儿童向成人)打小报告;告状 | |
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19 scurried | |
v.急匆匆地走( scurry的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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20 perusing | |
v.读(某篇文字)( peruse的现在分词 );(尤指)细阅;审阅;匆匆读或心不在焉地浏览(某篇文字) | |
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21 reassuring | |
a.使人消除恐惧和疑虑的,使人放心的 | |
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22 scotch | |
n.伤口,刻痕;苏格兰威士忌酒;v.粉碎,消灭,阻止;adj.苏格兰(人)的 | |
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23 epithet | |
n.(用于褒贬人物等的)表述形容词,修饰语 | |
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24 appellation | |
n.名称,称呼 | |
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25 salvation | |
n.(尤指基督)救世,超度,拯救,解困 | |
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26 dime | |
n.(指美国、加拿大的钱币)一角 | |
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27 conscientiously | |
adv.凭良心地;认真地,负责尽职地;老老实实 | |
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28 specimen | |
n.样本,标本 | |
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29 offhand | |
adj.临时,无准备的;随便,马虎的 | |
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30 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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31 rigidly | |
adv.刻板地,僵化地 | |
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32 poking | |
n. 刺,戳,袋 vt. 拨开,刺,戳 vi. 戳,刺,捅,搜索,伸出,行动散慢 | |
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33 scent | |
n.气味,香味,香水,线索,嗅觉;v.嗅,发觉 | |
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34 impudence | |
n.厚颜无耻;冒失;无礼 | |
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35 blight | |
n.枯萎病;造成破坏的因素;vt.破坏,摧残 | |
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36 winks | |
v.使眼色( wink的第三人称单数 );递眼色(表示友好或高兴等);(指光)闪烁;闪亮 | |
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37 sergeant | |
n.警官,中士 | |
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38 eloquence | |
n.雄辩;口才,修辞 | |
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39 sublimated | |
v.(使某物质)升华( sublimate的过去式和过去分词 );使净化;纯化 | |
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40 inquisitiveness | |
好奇,求知欲 | |
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41 nostrils | |
鼻孔( nostril的名词复数 ) | |
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42 exhausted | |
adj.极其疲惫的,精疲力尽的 | |
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43 indefatigability | |
n.不疲劳,不屈不挠 | |
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44 diversified | |
adj.多样化的,多种经营的v.使多样化,多样化( diversify的过去式和过去分词 );进入新的商业领域 | |
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45 leisurely | |
adj.悠闲的;从容的,慢慢的 | |
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