Chapter 73

    THERE IS a loneliness that can be rocked. Arms crossed, knees drawn¹ up; holding, holding on,this motion, unlike a ship's, smooths and contains the rocker. It's an inside kind — wrapped tightlike skin.

　　Then there is a loneliness that roams. No rocking can hold it down. It is alive, on its own. A dryand spreading thing that makes the sound of one's own feet going seem to come from a far-offplace. Everybody knew what she was called, but nobody anywhere knew her name.

　　Disremembered and unaccounted for, she cannot be lost because no one is looking for her, andeven if they were, how can they call her if they don't know her name? Although she has claim, sheis not claimed. In the place where long grass opens, the girl who waited to be loved and cry shameerupts into her separate parts, to make it easy for the chewing laughter to swallow her all away.

　　It was not a story to pass on.

　　They forgot her like a bad dream. After they made up their tales,shaped and decorated them, those that saw her that day on the porch quickly and deliberatelyforgot her. It took longer for those who had spoken to her, lived with her, fallen in love with her, toforget, until they realized they couldn't remember or repeat a single thing she said, and began tobelieve that, other than what they themselves were thinking, she hadn't said anything at all. So, inthe end, they forgot her too. Remembering seemed unwise. They never knew where or why shecrouched, or whose was the underwater face she needed like that. Where the memory of the smileunder her chin might have been and was not, a latch² latched³ and lichen⁴ attached its apple-greenbloom to the metal. What made her think her fingernails could open locks the rain rained on?

　　It was not a story to pass on.

　　So they forgot her. Like an unpleasant dream during a troubling sleep. Occasionally, however, therustle of a skirt hushes⁵ when they wake, and the knuckles⁶ brushing a cheek in sleep seem to belongto the sleeper⁷. Sometimes the photograph of a close friend or relative — looked at too long —shifts, and something more familiar than the dear face itself moves there. They can touch it if theylike, but don't, because they know things will never be the same if they do.

　　This is not a story to pass on.

　　Down by the stream in back of 124 her footprints come and go, come and go. They are so familiar.

　　Should a child, an adult place his feet in them, they will fit. Take them out and they disappear again as though nobody ever walked there.

　　By and by all trace is gone, and what is forgotten is not only the footprints but the water too andwhat it is down there. The rest is weather. Not the breath of the disremembered and unaccountedfor, but wind in the eaves, or spring ice thawing⁸ too quickly. Just weather.

　　Certainly no clamor for a kiss.

　　Beloved.

The End

1 drawn   

v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的

参考例句：

• All the characters in the story are drawn from life.故事中的所有人物都取材于生活。
• Her gaze was drawn irresistibly to the scene outside.她的目光禁不住被外面的风景所吸引。

2 latch   

n.门闩，窗闩；弹簧锁

参考例句：

• She laid her hand on the latch of the door.她把手放在门闩上。
• The repairman installed an iron latch on the door.修理工在门上安了铁门闩。

3 latched   

v.理解( latch的过去式和过去分词 )；纠缠；用碰锁锁上（门等）；附着（在某物上）

参考例句：

• The government have latched onto environmental issues to win votes. 政府已开始大谈环境问题以争取选票。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He latched onto us and we couldn't get rid of him. 他缠着我们，甩也甩不掉。 来自《简明英汉词典》

4 lichen   

n.地衣, 青苔

参考例句：

• The stone stairway was covered with lichen.那石级长满了地衣。
• There is carpet-like lichen all over the moist corner of the wall.潮湿的墙角上布满了地毯般的绿色苔藓。

5 hushes   

n.安静，寂静( hush的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Following the roar, out rushed a tiger from among the hushes. 一声吼叫，呼地从林子里冲出一只老虎来！ 来自互联网

6 knuckles   

n.（指人）指关节( knuckle的名词复数 )；（指动物）膝关节，踝v.（指人）指关节( knuckle的第三人称单数 )；（指动物）膝关节，踝

参考例句：

• He gripped the wheel until his knuckles whitened. 他紧紧握住方向盘，握得指关节都变白了。
• Her thin hands were twisted by swollen knuckles. 她那双纤手因肿大的指关节而变了形。 来自《简明英汉词典》

7 sleeper   

n.睡眠者，卧车，卧铺

参考例句：

• I usually go up to London on the sleeper. 我一般都乘卧车去伦敦。
• But first he explained that he was a very heavy sleeper. 但首先他解释说自己睡觉很沉。

8 thawing   

n.熔化，融化v.（气候）解冻( thaw的现在分词 )；（态度、感情等）缓和；（冰、雪及冷冻食物）溶化；软化

参考例句：

• The ice is thawing. 冰在融化。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》
• It had been snowing and thawing and the streets were sloppy. 天一直在下雪，雪又一直在融化，街上泥泞不堪。 来自英汉文学 - 嘉莉妹妹