The telegram, worded in the spirit just described, was forthwith despatched care of Belknap and Jephson, whoimmediately counseled Clyde what to reply--that all was well with him; that he had the best of advice and wouldneed no financial aid. Also that until his lawyers advised it, it would be best if no member of the family troubledto appear, since everything that could possibly be done to aid him was already being done. At the same time theywrote Mrs. Griffiths, assuring her of their interest in Clyde and advising her to let matters rest as they were forthe present.
Despite the fact that the Griffiths were thus restrained from appearing in the east, neither Belknap nor Jephsonwere averse2 to some news of the existence, whereabouts, faith and sympathy of Clyde's most immediate1 relativescreeping into the newspapers, since the latter were so persistent3 in referring to his isolation4. And in thisconnection they were aided by the fact that his mother's telegram on being received in Bridgeburg was at onceread by individuals who were particularly interested in the case and by them whispered to the public and thepress, with the result that in Denver the family was at once sought out and interviewed. And shortly after, therewas circulated in all the papers east and west a more or less complete account of the present state of Clyde'sfamily, the nature of the mission conducted by them, as well as their narrow and highly individualistic religiousbeliefs and actions, even the statement that often in his early youth Clyde had been taken into the streets to singand pray--a revelation which shocked Lycurgus and Twelfth Lake society about as much as it did him.
At the same time, Mrs. Griffiths, being an honest woman and whole-heartedly sincere in her faith and in thegood of her work, did not hesitate to relate to reporter after reporter who called, all the details of the missionarywork of her husband and herself in Denver and elsewhere. Also that neither Clyde nor any of the other childrenhad ever enjoyed the opportunities that come to most. However, her boy, whatever the present charge might be,was not innately5 bad, and she could not believe that he was guilty of any such crime. It was all an unfortunateand accidental combination of circumstances which he would explain at the trial. However, whatever foolishthing he might have done, it was all to be attributed to an unfortunate accident which broke up the mission workin Kansas City a few years before and compelled the removal of the family from there to Denver, leaving Clydeto make his way alone. And it was because of advice from her that he had written her husband's rich brother inLycurgus, which led to his going there--a series of statements which caused Clyde in his cell to tingle6 with a kindof prideful misery7 and resentment8 and forced him to write his mother and complain. Why need she always talkso much about the past and the work that she and his father were connected with, when she knew that he hadnever liked it and resented going on the streets? Many people didn't see it as she and his father did, particularlyhis uncle and cousin and all those rich people he had come to know, and who were able to make their way in sodifferent and much more brilliant fashion. And now, as he said to himself, Sondra would most certainly read this--all that he had hoped to conceal9.
Yet even in the face of all this, because of so much sincerity10 and force in his mother, he could not help but thinkof her with affection and respect, and because of her sure and unfailing love for him, with emotion. For in answerto his letter she wrote that she was sorry if she had hurt his feelings or injured him in any way. But must not thetruth be shown always? The ways of God were for the best and surely no harm could spring from service in Hiscause. He must not ask her to lie. But if he said the word, she would so gladly attempt to raise the necessarymoney and come to his aid--sit in his cell and plan with him--holding his hands--but as Clyde so well knew andthought at this time and which caused him to decide that she must not come yet--demanding of him the truth-withthose clear, steady blue eyes of hers looking into his own. He could not stand that now.
For, frowning directly before him, like a huge and basalt headland above a troubled and angry sea, was the trialitself, with all that it implied--the fierce assault of Mason which he could only confront, for the most part, withthe lies framed for him by Jephson and Belknap. For, although he was constantly seeking to salve his consciencewith the thought that at the last moment he had not had the courage to strike Roberta, nevertheless this otherstory was so terribly difficult for him to present and defend--a fact which both Belknap and Jephson realized andwhich caused the latter to appear most frequently at Clyde's cell door with the greeting: "Well, how's tricks today?"The peculiarly rusty11 and disheveled and indifferently tailored character of Jephson's suits! The worn anddisarranged effect of his dark brown soft hat, pulled low over his eyes! His long, bony, knotty12 hands, suggestingsomehow an enormous tensile strength. And the hard, small blue eyes filled with a shrewd, determined13 cunningand courage, with which he was seeking to inoculate14 Clyde, and which somehow did inoculate him!
"Any more preachers around to-day? Any more country girls or Mason's boys?" For during this time, because ofthe enormous interest aroused by the pitiable death of Roberta, as well as the evidence of her rich and beautifulrival, Clyde was being visited by every type of shallow crime-or-sex-curious country bumpkin lawyer, doctor,merchant, yokel15 evangelist or minister, all friends or acquaintances of one or another of the officials of the city,and who, standing16 before his cell door betimes, and at the most unexpected moments, and after surveying himwith curious, or resentful, or horrified17 eyes, asked such questions as: "Do you pray, brother? Do you get rightdown on your knees and pray?" (Clyde was reminded of his mother and father at such times.) Had he made hispeace with God? Did he actually deny that he had killed Roberta Alden? In the case of three country girls:
"Would you mind telling us the name of the girl you are supposed to be in love with, and where she is now? Wewon't tell any one. Will she appear at the trial?" Questions which Clyde could do no more than ignore, or if not,answer as equivocally or evasively or indifferently as possible. For although he was inclined to resent them, stillwas he not being constantly instructed by both Belknap and Jephson that for the good of his own cause he musttry to appear genial18 and civil and optimistic? Then there came also newspaper men, or women, accompanied byartists or photographers, to interview and make studies of him. But with these, for the most part and on theadvice of Belknap and Jephson he refused to communicate or said only what he was told to say.
"You can talk all you want," suggested Jephson, genially19, "so long as you don't say anything. And the stiff upperlip, you know. And the smile that won't come off, see? Not failing to go over that list, are you?" (He hadprovided Clyde with a long list of possible questions which no doubt would be asked him on the stand and whichhe was to answer according to answers typewritten beneath them, or to suggest something better. They all related to the trip to Big Bittern, his reason for the extra hat, his change of heart--why, when, where.) "That's yourlitany, you know." And then he might light a cigarette without ever offering one to Clyde, since for the sake of areputation for sobriety he was not to smoke here.
And for a time, after each visit, Clyde finding himself believing that he could and would do exactly as Jephsonhad said--walk briskly and smartly into court--bear up against every one, every eye, even that of Mason himself-forgetthat he was afraid of him, even when on the witness stand--forget all the terror of those many facts inMason's possession, which he was to explain with this list of answers--forget Roberta and her last cry, and all theheartache and misery that went with the loss of Sondra and her bright world.
Yet, with the night having once more fallen, or the day dragging on with only the lean and bearded Kraut or thesly and evasive Sissel, or both, hanging about, or coming to the door to say, "Howdy!" or to discuss somethingthat had occurred in town, or to play chess, or checkers, Clyde growing more and more moody20 and deciding,maybe, that there was no real hope for him after all. For how alone he was, except for his attorneys and motherand brother and sisters! Never a word from Sondra, of course. For along with her recovery to some extent fromher original shock and horror, she was now thinking somewhat differently of him--that after all it was for love ofher, perhaps, that he had slain21 Roberta and made himself the pariah22 and victim that he now was. Yet, because ofthe immense prejudice and horror expressed by the world, she was by no means able to think of venturing tosend him a word. Was he not a murderer? And in addition, that miserable23 western family of his, pictured as streetpreachers, and he, too,--or as a singing and praying boy from a mission! Yet occasionally returning in thought,and this quite in spite of herself, to his eager, unreasoning and seemingly consuming enthusiasm for her. (Howdeeply he must have cared to venture upon so deadly a deed!) And hence wondering whether at some time, oncethis case was less violently before the public eye, it might not be possible to communicate with him in someguarded and unsigned way, just to let him know, perhaps, that because of his great love for her she desired himto know that he was not entirely24 forgotten. Yet as instantly deciding, NO, no--her parents--if they should learn-orguess--or the public, or her one-time associates. Not now, oh, not now at least. Maybe later if he were setfree--or--or--convicted--she couldn't tell. Yet suffering heartaches for the most part--as much as she detested25 andabhorred the horrible crime by which he had sought to win her.
And in the interim26, Clyde in his cell, walking to and fro, or looking out on the dull square through the heavilybarred windows, or reading and re-reading the newspapers, or nervously27 turning the pages of magazines or booksfurnished by his counsel, or playing chess or checkers, or eating his meals, which, by special arrangement on thepart of Belknap and Jephson (made at the request of his uncle), consisted of better dishes than were usuallyfurnished to the ordinary prisoner.
Yet with the iterated and reiterated28 thought, based on the seemingly irreparable and irreconcilable29 loss of Sondra,as to whether it was possible for him to go on with this--make this, as he at times saw it, almost useless fight.
At times, in the middle of the night or just before dawn, with all the prison silent--dreams--a ghastly picture of allthat he most feared and that dispelled30 every trace of courage and drove him instantly to his feet, his heartpounding wildly, his eyes strained, a cold damp upon his face and hands. That chair, somewhere in the Statepenitentiary. He had read of it--how men died in it. And then he would walk up and down, thinking how, how, incase it did not come about as Jephson felt so sure that it would--in case he was convicted and a new trialrefused--then, well--then, might one be able to break out of such a jail as this, maybe, and run away? These old brick walls. How thick were they? But was it possible that with a hammer or a stone, or something that some onemight bring him--his brother Frank, or his sister Julia, or Ratterer, or Hegglund--if only he could get incommunication with some one of them and get him or her to bring him something of the kind--If only he couldget a saw, to saw those bars! And then run, run, as he should have in those woods up there that time! But how?
And whither?
按照以上所述写成的一封电报,当即发出,烦请贝尔纳普和杰夫森转交。
他们收到以后,马上给克莱德出点子,要他回答说:
目下他一切都好,他的辩护律师很出色。同时也不需要经济上的帮助。还说,要是他的辩护律师没有通知他们,最好不要麻烦家里来人了,因为,凡是他需要的各种帮助,只要能办到的,早都在办了。同时,他们还另外写信给格里菲思太太,向她保证他们非常关心克莱德,并劝她这件事暂时不要去管为好。
纵然西部格里菲思一家人因受劝阻,没有在东部出现,可是,不论是贝尔纳普也好,还是杰夫森也好,他们都不反对各报上点点滴滴透露出一些情况,说克莱德是有亲人的,现在他们都在什么地方,以及他们个个对克莱德满怀着信心和同情。因为,在这以前,各报总是动不动就提到克莱德孤苦伶仃,得不到亲人们的关怀。而令各报喜出望外的是,克莱德母亲的电报一到布里奇伯格,就被一些对本案特别感兴趣的人看见了。这些人又把此事偷偷她告诉了公众与报界某些人。结果,在丹佛的这一家人,立即被记者一找到就采访过了。东部。
西部所有的报纸,都刊载了一篇相当详尽的报道,比方说,有关克莱德家的目前境况,他们经办的传道馆的活动,他们非常狭隘而又独特的宗教信仰和实践,甚至还谈到,克莱德小时候,也不得不上街唱赞美诗。做祈祷……这些消息在报端一披露,几乎使莱柯格斯和第十二号湖畔上流社会人士,如同克莱德本人一样深感震惊。
格里菲思太太是个诚实的女人,对自己的信仰和活动,真可以说是虔心诚意。她毫不迟疑地对一个个登门采访的记者介绍了她丈夫和她自己在丹佛等地传道的详细情况。她还说到,别人家孩子一般都能过上好日子,可是,不管克莱德也好,还是她其他的孩子也好,却一个也没能沾上边。但是话又说回来,不管目前控告他犯了什么什么罪,她的孩子天性并不坏,她决不相信他真的会犯了这一类罪行。这一切全是一些不幸的意外事故凑在一起而造成的,他在法庭受审时是会解释清楚的。可是,不管他可能做过一些什么荒唐事,说到底,毛病全都出在那次不幸的意外事故上。几年前,他们也就不得不放弃在堪萨斯城的传道活动,举家迁往丹佛,好让克莱德独自谋生去。正是由于她的劝告,她的丈夫才写信给莱柯格斯的那个有钱的哥哥,因此后来还到莱柯格斯去了一趟。克莱德在牢房里读到这一系列采访报道,觉得伤了他的自尊心,因而极为反感。最后,他不得不写信给母亲,大发牢骚,说她干吗非要把过去的事以及她和他父亲的传教活动老是讲个没完没了,既然她也知道他儿子从来不喜欢这一套,而且对上街传道历来是很反感的?
很多人的看法跟她和他父亲迥然不同,特别是他的伯父和堂兄以及他有幸结识的所有一切有钱人,他们都是通过完全不同,而且光彩得多的办法获得成功。现在,他自言自语地说,想必桑德拉当然也会看到这一切……所有这些他一直想隐瞒的事了。
不过,尽管这样,他一想起母亲禁不住心中满怀着眷爱和敬意,因为母亲身上充满了那么多的热诚和力量,而且,她始终如一。坚定不移地爱他,就使他情绪上更加激动不已。她在给他的回信上说,要是她伤了他的心,或是伤害了他的感情,那她也是很难过的。不过话又说回来,难道真理不是永远应该让人讲吗?
上帝的道路都是通往至善至美的道路,侍奉上帝当然不会招来什么恶果。
克莱德决不应该要求她说谎话。不过,只要他开口说一句话,她一定高高兴兴地设法筹措一笔必不可缺的钱,赶来帮助他……跟他一起坐班房,琢磨拯救他的方案……握住他的手……不过,克莱德心里很明白,也早就考虑过了,因此,他决定现在还千万不能让她来……她依然等着他说真话……她的那双明亮。坚定的蓝眼睛会直瞪瞪地盯住他的眼睛。这在目前真叫他受不了。
因为,他面临着法庭受审……审讯如同怒涛汹涌的大海上一座巨大的玄武岩岬横在他面前。何况一开庭就意味着梅森的猛烈攻击,对此,克莱德多半只能用杰夫森。贝尔纳普替他编好的那一套假话来应对。虽然他一直聊以自慰的是:
在最后关键时刻,他总算没有勇气去砸罗伯达,可是,要他另外编出一套话来,而且还得为之进行辩护,他觉得委实太难了……贝尔纳普和杰夫森看出了这一点,所以,杰夫森就经常光临克莱德牢房门口,跟他打招呼,说:
"喂,今天的事儿怎么样?
"瞧杰夫森身上这套衣服,样子真怪,又旧,又脏,针脚也马虎极了!
还有他头上歪戴着的那顶深棕色破帽子,低得快要盖住眼睛了!
他的那双瘦骨嶙峋的长手,多少给人显示出一种巨大的力量。他的那双严峻的。小小的蓝眼睛,精明。
坚定。狡猾,但又充满了勇气……这些气质正是他竭力灌输给克莱德的,而且好歹部分已经灌输给他了!
"今天又有谁来过没有?
比方说,是什么传教士。什么乡下姑娘呀,还是梅森的伙计们?
"因为,近来人们对罗伯达的惨死,及其有钱而又美丽的情敌,都激起了极大的兴趣。因此,对犯罪只是一知半解的,或是对性问题感到好奇的各色人等,诸如乡下的蹩脚律师。医生。掌柜。乡村福音传教士或牧师,还有本地这个或那个官员的所有朋友。熟人,都赶来这儿竞相争睹克莱德了。他们老早就伫立在他的牢房门口,先是用好奇。憎恨,或是可怕的眼光把他上下打量一番,然后冷不防向他提出类似这样的一些问题:
"你要做祷告吗,伙计?
你还不马上跪下来做祷告?
"(这时,克莱德就常常回想起了他的父母。)他向上帝祈求宽恕了吗?
他确实否认他杀害了罗伯达。奥尔登小姐吗?
有一回,三个乡下姑娘一块问他:
"请你把你据说爱过的那位姑娘的名字告诉我们?
现在她在哪个地方?
我们决不会告诉任何一个人的。到时候她也会出庭吗?
"对于这些问题,克莱德只能一概置之不理,要不然,回答时就尽量含糊其词。模棱两可,或是漫不经心。尽管他对这些问题讨厌透了,可是,贝尔纳普和杰夫森却不时点拨他说,为了他自己着想,他还得佯装自己很和气,很有礼貌,很乐观呢?
紧接着,还有一些男女新闻记者,带着画家或摄影记者一起前来采访,为他拍照画像。不过,对于这些人,他根据贝尔纳普和杰夫森的旨意,八成儿拒绝交谈,要不然向他们只说事先关照过他该说的一些话。
"你不妨爱怎么说,就怎么说呗,"杰夫森和蔼地给他出主意说。"只要你什么都不说出来就得了。此外,你自己要沉住气,明白吧?
脸上还要陪笑,明白吧?
别忘了常常翻翻那份单子吧?
"(杰夫森给了克莱德一份长长的单子,上面列出了开庭时势必向他提出的一些问题,那时他就得按照用打字机打在那些问题下面的答案作回答,要不然,此刻想到有什么更好的意见就不妨提出来。所有这些问题,都涉及到他的大比腾之行,他又买了另外一顶草帽的原因,他回心转意的原因……是为了什么,在什么时候,又是在什么地方。)"这些你可要记得烂熟,你明白吧?
"随后,也许他就给自己点燃一支烟卷,可他从来也不给克莱德递烟的,因为让他能有一个正派青年的名声,克莱德在这里是不能抽烟的。
有一段时间,在杰夫森每次探监以后,克莱德觉得杰夫森的吩咐自己完全可以做到……精神抖擞。步态轻盈地走向法庭……不管是什么人,也不管是哪一人的目光,甚至是梅森本人的目光,他都能顶得住……哪怕是在证人席上,他也能忘掉自己对梅森的惧怕……梅森所掌握的这许许多多事实,他将按照这份单子上的答案一一加以解释,面对这些事实时的恐怖,他也能忘掉……还有罗伯达。她那最后的惨叫声,以及失去桑德拉和她快活的小天地以后所产生的内心痛苦和不幸,他通通能忘掉了。
不过,每当夜色又将降临,或是度日如年的时候,眼前只有那个瘦骨嶙峋。
满脸胡子茬的克劳特,或是那个狡猾而又不可捉摸的西塞尔,或者他们两人都在附近转悠,也许会来到牢房门口说一声:
"你好吧!
"或是闲扯本镇发生的什么新闻,或者下象棋。玩跳棋,这时,克莱德心中就越发感到忧郁,觉得自己出狱也许压根儿没有什么希望了。因为,他该有多么孤单啊,除了还有他的辩护律师。母亲。弟弟。姐妹的话!
桑德拉,当然罗,决不会给他捎来片言只语的。因为,当初她确实感到震惊和骇怕,但是惊魂甫定以后,她对克莱德的想法就多少有些不同了……归根到底,他之所以杀害罗伯达,沦为今日被人唾弃的倒霉鬼。也许就是为了爱她。但由于整个社会极深的偏见和震惊,她怎么也不敢想到给他写信,哪怕只是个短信。他不就是一个杀人犯啊?
何况,他在西部的那个家,该有多惨呀,据报上说他父母都是沿街传道的人,连他本人也是……要不然就是来自传道馆的一个专门唱赞美诗。做祈祷的孩子!
不过,有时,她也情不自禁回想到他对她那股子急切的。丧失理性的。看来足以使他自我毁灭的热情。
(想必是他爱她爱得那么深,这才敢铤而走险呀!
)因此,她在暗自琢磨,不妨等到某个时候,这一案件不象现在这样遭到公众激烈反对,是不是可以通过某种谨慎的。不署名的方式写信给他,也许仅仅是让他知道:
他并没有完全被遗忘,因为从前他是那么狂热地爱过她。可她马上又决定,不,不行……她的父母……他们要是知道了,或是猜到了……再有,万一给大家,或是给她过去的朋友们知道了,那还了得。现在可写不得,哦,至少现在还写不得。也许再稍晚一些日子,等他被释放了,或是……或是……定了罪……连她自己还说不准。可她心里一直感到创巨痛深……对于他为了竭力想赢得她而犯下的这种骇人的罪行,她是多么深恶痛绝啊。
就在这时,克莱德正在他的牢房里来回走动,或是透过铁窗望着外面死气沉沉的广场,或是把一些报纸读了又读,或是忐忑不安地翻阅着他的辩护律师送来的那些书报杂志,或是下象棋。玩跳棋,或是按时进餐,由于贝尔纳普和杰夫森同狱长作出了特别安排(这是他伯父提出的意见),他的饭菜供应要比普通犯人的好一些。
可是一想到自己似乎无可弥补地失去了桑德拉,他心里老是在琢磨,自己能不能把这场……这场他有时觉得几乎毫无用处的斗争继续坚持下去。
有时,在深更半夜,或是在刚破晓以前,整个监狱里寂然无声……一个个梦……他最害怕的恐怖的画面使他的勇气丧失殆尽,惊得他一跃而起,心儿狂跳,两眼睁得大大的,脸上。手上直冒冷汗。在本州监狱里某处的那张电椅呀。
从前克莱德读到过……犯人们怎样在这张电椅上死去的。他就开始走来走去,暗自思忖:
万一结果并不象杰夫森感到的那样十拿九稳的话……万一他被定了罪,复审的要求又被驳回的话,那怎么办……那时,啊……那时,也许能不能从这儿越狱出逃?
这些旧砖墙。该有多厚呀?
也许用一把铁锤就是一块石头,反正不拘是谁……他弟弟弗兰克,或是他妹妹朱丽娅,或是拉特勒,或是赫格伦……也许会带给他什么东西……只要他能跟他们里头某个人接上头,让他们把这一类东西带给他……只要他能寻摸到一把锯子,把这些铁栅栏锯断!
然后,出逃,出逃,如同上次在树林子里他早就应该逃跑了!
可是,怎么逃跑呢?
逃往何方呢?
1 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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2 averse | |
adj.厌恶的;反对的,不乐意的 | |
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3 persistent | |
adj.坚持不懈的,执意的;持续的 | |
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4 isolation | |
n.隔离,孤立,分解,分离 | |
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5 innately | |
adv.天赋地;内在地,固有地 | |
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6 tingle | |
vi.感到刺痛,感到激动;n.刺痛,激动 | |
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7 misery | |
n.痛苦,苦恼,苦难;悲惨的境遇,贫苦 | |
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8 resentment | |
n.怨愤,忿恨 | |
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9 conceal | |
v.隐藏,隐瞒,隐蔽 | |
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10 sincerity | |
n.真诚,诚意;真实 | |
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11 rusty | |
adj.生锈的;锈色的;荒废了的 | |
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12 knotty | |
adj.有结的,多节的,多瘤的,棘手的 | |
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13 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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14 inoculate | |
v.给...接种,给...注射疫苗 | |
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15 yokel | |
n.乡下人;农夫 | |
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16 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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17 horrified | |
a.(表现出)恐惧的 | |
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18 genial | |
adj.亲切的,和蔼的,愉快的,脾气好的 | |
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19 genially | |
adv.亲切地,和蔼地;快活地 | |
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20 moody | |
adj.心情不稳的,易怒的,喜怒无常的 | |
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21 slain | |
杀死,宰杀,杀戮( slay的过去分词 ); (slay的过去分词) | |
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22 pariah | |
n.被社会抛弃者 | |
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23 miserable | |
adj.悲惨的,痛苦的;可怜的,糟糕的 | |
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24 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
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25 detested | |
v.憎恶,嫌恶,痛恨( detest的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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26 interim | |
adj.暂时的,临时的;n.间歇,过渡期间 | |
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27 nervously | |
adv.神情激动地,不安地 | |
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28 reiterated | |
反复地说,重申( reiterate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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29 irreconcilable | |
adj.(指人)难和解的,势不两立的 | |
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30 dispelled | |
v.驱散,赶跑( dispel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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